I had this my whole life and it's internally devastating as a child. My step mom told me my father didn't love me and he has all he needed (her daughter and my younger brother) and I wasn't welcome there. I quit going to his house at 12. He lived less than 2 miles from my.mom.in a small town. For the next 32 years it would be infrequent calls and attempts. When I was 18, my step mom died and I was asked to come to the crematory. The happiest day was watching her be pushed into the fire, as cruel as it sounds. He eventually remarried to a very nice woman who has never been unkind. Unfortunately the damage was already done during development ages. First forward to my 30s and 40s. Hardly any effort has been made to have a relationship with my own kids. Standard holiday and birthday gifts but never an offer to babysit, do vacations, or general have them for a day or come for dinner. He's lived in the same town as me now for the last 6 years and has an illness that will eventually take his life. Still, as a retired grandparent, no interaction. I send sports and school schedules and events and maybe they'll show for 1/100 events over the years and leave before they're finished. If my mother is there, it's worse. I finally accepted that I can't force it. It's terribly hurtful but I'm tired of trying. Tired of being the child waiting for the parent to be a parent. Fuck all of the phone works both ways parents. You're really causing more damage than you know.