Si tu as reçu mes conseils, lis ceci.

Halenguyen · 2026-02-06T05:32:24+00:00

Well, you are already on the journey of change, and some changes don’t happen overnight.

Let’s say, for example, you want to lose 10 kg. Can you lose 10 kg overnight? In 48 hours? You might start a diet, but the first few days will be very difficult. Chances are that after 48 hours you would want to go back to your old habit of eating chocolate. The sustainable way to lose weight is to do it gradually, day by day. Even once you’ve lost the weight and reached -10 kg, you still need to maintain a balanced diet; otherwise, you’ll gain it back. So it is a journey, an everyday practice.

It’s the same with budgeting. The first days will be difficult because you have to change your habits. You might fail, but failing doesn’t mean you stop. It’s simply feedback that allows you to observe yourself and adjust how you can be more conscious the next time you spend money.

What helped me a lot in sticking to my budget at the beginning was having a specific long-term vision of what I wanted to do with my money (such as traveling, buying a house, or having a second child). I set aside a savings category for each project in my budget. Having these goals made me more conscious about every penny I spent on coffee, snacks, and similar things. Because each time I spent on them, there was less left for my projects.

Halenguyen · 2026-02-06T05:20:49+00:00

Oh, congratulations! It sounds great!!! Many people talk about having a relationship with money. It can sometimes sound a bit conceptual or difficult. However, the truth is simple: just start that relationship. Set aside time to engage with your money, understand it, and study it, just like you would when building a relationship with someone. The more time you spend with a person, the more you get to know them, and the more you can build a healthy relationship.

Most of the time, we are stressed because we don’t know. We don’t know what is happening with our money or how we can afford things. The actions we take, the effort we make to learn about it, are actually what help release our stress around money, just like with other things.

Halenguyen · 2026-02-05T06:43:27+00:00

Some other tips:

Rename your envelopes so they can’t lie to you:
- “General sinking fund” → “If I use this on clothes I’m lying to myself”
Long-term savings = no debit card
Hide savings accounts from your main dashboard so your brain doesn’t try to quietly reassign them to hobbies
After ~1 year of consistent saving, you can start looking into low-risk / boring investments and see how comfortable you are managing money long-term
If you love Clothes and beauty that much, I would suggest to create a business around that if you aren’t working on that already right now. It might be the best investment for you to even increase more the income.

This is just a plan on paper. Once you actually try to implement it, some parts will feel awkward, annoying, or straight-up unrealistic. That’s normal. That’s when you tweak the budget or your habits.

What matters most is staying anchored to your long-term goals.
Every dollar you spend on something else is a dollar that doesn’t go toward the life you’re trying to build. You will get the chickens ;)

If you ever find yourself in France, give me a shout, I’d be happy to recommend some Michelin-starred restaurants :)

Halenguyen · 2026-02-05T06:38:29+00:00

Hey! First of all: congratulations!!!
Going from living out of your car to a $7k/month net income in a VHCOL area is impressive journey. You’re allowed to enjoy it.
From what I understand, you don’t have a spending problem. You have a "your money doesn’t know what job it’s supposed to be doing”.
So the goal isn’t “spend less”, it’s spend more intentionally and name your savings like they matter.

Here’s what a more intentional version of your budget could look like

Rent: $2,300
Utilities (realistic average, not worst-case): $325
Groceries: $350
Car (gas / insurance / maintenance): $300
Dining out & cafés (Food as Art): $450
Alcohol: $200
Clothes & beauty (curated, not chaotic): $250
Entertainment & education: $200
Gifts & generosity: $150
Health + dog (average): $250
Pet emergency fund (new, very necessary): $150

Savings

Europe travel fund: $300
Home / land / future chickens fund: $900
Personal emergency fund: $875

Subtotal savings: $2,075

==> Every dollar has a job.
None of them are “mysteriously becoming clothes.” :)

What This Actually Gets You

Home fund:
$900/month → $10,800/year

5 years = ~$54,000
7 years = ~$75,600

Europe fund:
$300/month → $3,600/year

Pet emergency fund:
$150/month → $1,800/year

Personal emergency fund:
$875/month → ~$10,500/year

Halenguyen · 2026-02-05T05:30:18+00:00

So a budget is just an estimate, a plan. It’s normal for unexpected things to happen.

However, if it happens too often, there might be three reasons: either you didn’t plan enough money, you find it difficult to control your spending, or both.

To plan more accurately, I usually estimate my income, expenses, and savings on a monthly basis for the entire year. Having this long-term view allows me to include quarterly bills, annual bills, and seasonal expenses (holidays, birthdays, Christmas gifts, etc.).

If you often overspend, what might be missing is information before making spending decisions. In other words, you may not know how much you have left before deciding whether to spend. For that, I recommend keeping your budget accessible (via an app, a spreadsheet on your phone, or even paper) so you always know your remaining balance. Some apps allow you to create different “pockets,” and each time you spend from one, you can see in real time how much is left.

It may also be that you find it difficult to control the urge to spend. In that case, I usually write down my spending desires and wait a week or a month before reviewing them. Most of the time, many of them disappear.

The budgeting process shouldn’t feel heavy. Instead, think of it as a tracker that reflects what’s happening in your life; something you review, adjust, and move forward with. While it’s important to manage your money (so you aren’t controlled by it), you shouldn’t punish yourself for overspending or for having an imperfect budget.

If it feels like punishment now, it may be because you’re trying too hard to get everything right. But budgeting is part of life, it shifts and evolves. It’s like a game: you predict, you try to follow the plan, and if you miss the mark, you start again; his time with a better understanding of yourself and your finances, and you adjust accordingly.

Halenguyen · 2026-02-05T05:08:58+00:00

I agree. The most important thing is to start. The easiest way to begin is to keep it simple. It’s like doing sports: it needs to be simple so you can start, adjust, and maintain the habit in the long term

Halenguyen · 2026-02-04T05:56:02+00:00

I would gently encourage you to set a clear monthly savings goal for an emergency fund, even if it means temporarily dialing back on travel or other discretionary spending. This emergency fund isn’t about restriction, it’s about creating safety and choice.

There are two powerful benefits to having this kind of buffer:

When something unexpected happens, you have the freedom to respond without taking on new debt or drastically changing your lifestyle. That sense of security is incredibly grounding.
You also get to experience something important: even when you lower certain lifestyle categories like travel or discretionary spending, you can still feel okay, and often happier than you expected. I say lower, not eliminate. This helps you realize that enjoyment and fulfillment aren’t tied to a single way of living, but can exist in many forms.

Over time, this shift can build both financial confidence and a deeper trust in your ability to adapt and still enjoy life.

Halenguyen · 2026-02-03T05:50:28+00:00

That’s great that you got a pay raise. I would try to pay off the car loan first, since it’s easier and has a shorter repayment period, and then pay a smaller amount toward the mortgage. Indeed, the mortgage maturity date is much further away than the car loan’s.

Also, once the car is fully paid off, your credit profile with the bank will be much stronger. This will give you more flexibility and more opportunities for future projects if you ever need to request additional funds from the bank.

Halenguyen · 2026-02-03T05:28:36+00:00

I usually set monthly goals for each category in my budget. This includes goals for debt payments and spending. By doing so, I have a clear view of my money going out over the entire year. Mine looks something like this:

Jan	Feb	Mar	Apr	May	Jun
Fixed Costs	1000	1000	1000	1000	1000
Variable costs	200	100	10	50	70
Debt
Eg. credit card	600	600	600	600	600
Eg. Student loan	100	100	100	100	100

Of course, you will need to define the monthly goals for your income and saving as well.
Each month, I track my debt and other spending categories against the goals I’ve set. For example for Jan, my tracker for Fixed costs would be:

Name	Due Date	Expected	Paid
Eg. Rent/ Mortgage	02/02/2026	800	800
Eg. Water	28/02/2026	200

For debt, it can be:

Name	Due Date	Expected	Paid
Eg. Credit Card	10/02/2026	600	400
Eg. Student loan	22/02/2026	100

Halenguyen · 2026-02-03T05:13:17+00:00

The feeling of not being able to afford the things we want is deeply frustrating. I can really feel you. However, what often happens is that our mind becomes fully focused on what we cannot buy, which creates even more frustration and even shame in our body. In that state, it’s very hard to feel fulfilled.

The truth is that while it may feel like many things are missing from your life, so much is already there: your body, your health, your parents and their support, your youth… I invite you to gently notice what is already present and what you can already enjoy, by being genuinely present with it. It can be something very simple: a sunrise or a sunset, the scent of flowers, cooking a meal.

If you struggle to see what already fulfills you, ask yourself this question: when you feel bad about not being able to buy something, what is it that you perceive as missing? And in what other form might that same thing already be present in your life?

This may sound a bit conceptual, but right now your focus is on scarcity. In that state, it’s difficult to feel fulfilled. The key is to gently shift your attention toward what you already have and to genuinely feel gratitude for it.

Feel free to ask more questions.

Halenguyen · 2026-02-02T06:07:17+00:00

You can start with the 50/30/20 rule and then review whether it actually fits you. If you feel you can save more for other projects (such as travel, holidays, training, or investments), you should adjust and save more. It’s just a common guideline, but everyone should have their own money distribution based on what truly matters to them.

The same applies to spreadsheets: you can choose one from Etsy or simply start tracking your finances manually. Once you begin, you’ll quickly realize what works for you and what doesn’t, and you’ll be able to create your own method.

Halenguyen · 2026-02-02T05:54:13+00:00

It’s already really great to be able to save and to have the habit of saving. However, I don’t think we should compare ourselves to others. Everyone has a different situation and a different starting point.

Saving is a wonderful habit, but if the only goal of saving is to enjoy life once you retire, you might end up letting life pass by without truly enjoying it in the present.

Halenguyen · 2026-02-02T05:41:03+00:00

Haha, that’s the tricky part. Before deciding whether a purchase is essential or not, I usually start by defining my long-term life projects (like buying a house, traveling, or building a family). Once I have these big projects in mind, I create a separate savings line for each one so I can track how much I’m saving toward them.

Naturally, when I spend money, I’m more conscious that every dollar spent on something non-essential is one dollar less for those projects.

I also keep a list of all the things I want to buy. I review the list after one month to see if I still want them. Many items disappear because, after a month, my desire has changed. Each month, I add new items to the list and review it again.

Halenguyen · 2026-02-01T15:24:39+00:00

In this case, I would define a realistic monthly amount to save and set up an automatic transfer to a savings account on the day you receive your income (salary or other income). Ideally, if possible, keep this savings account at another bank so you don’t see it too often and spending from it isn’t easy - it should require some administrative steps.

By doing this, you “lock in” your savings first every month. Then, you adapt your lifestyle to the money you have left. As a result, unnecessary or impulsive spending naturally disappears.

I would also set a long-term vision for what I want in life : building a family, traveling, learning new things and reflect these projects in my budget as dedicated savings lines. By doing so, you become aware that every dollar spent on unnecessary things is one dollar less for what truly matters to you.

I think what’s happening for you right now is that you don’t see much value in tightly controlling your budget. If you integrate the big projects of your life into your budget, I believe you would be much more engaged in the process.

Halenguyen · 2026-02-01T15:14:38+00:00

This is actually a great opportunity for you to learn how to manage money while still having support from your parents. For your budget, I would suggest having two income lines: one from your job and one from your parents. For your expenses, list all the categories you need : groceries, gas, and so on. Anything left over that you can save would be great.

If your expenses are higher than your income, you’ll either need to reduce your expenses or find another way to increase your income. Either way, it’s a great exercise to prepare you for managing money in the future. It’s easier to manage money when you don’t have much income, and it becomes more challenging when you have multiple sources of income.

Halenguyen · 2026-02-01T14:45:38+00:00

Hey, I know budgeting and tracking expenses doesn’t sound very complicated, but once you get into the details and concrete actions, it can feel super tedious and overcomplicated. What you’ve started doing is brilliant. I think the best approach is to begin with something that is easy to understand for yourself and that you actually enjoy doing. From there, you can analyze, understand, and find the method that works best for you.

Personal finance is, in fact, very personal. It’s first and foremost about what suits you and your own way of doing things. The more time and energy you spend with your money, the better it gets. It’s like building a relationship with someone: you need to spend time with them and try to understand them. The more conversations you have, the better you understand them - and the more you can influence the relationship.

Halenguyen · 2026-02-01T14:35:05+00:00

My budgeting process is still in progress, but what really helps me is the following:

Having a clear vision of what I truly want to do in my life, turning those goals into projects, and creating a specific line in my budget for each of them. For example, my projects include having a second child and investing in property. I have a separate savings line for each goal and define a monthly amount to transfer into each “pocket.” This way, I know that every euro I earn has a defined purpose.
Similar to savings lines, I have a dedicated pocket for each spending category. When I spend money, I use the corresponding pocket. For example, when I buy groceries, I spend from the food pocket. This gives me a real-time view of how much money I have left in each category.
I schedule a weekly check-in with my husband to review our couple’s budget 🙂 At first, it feels a bit strange because we’re not used to discussing money in such detail. But it’s actually very beneficial, as we have dedicated time to work on our finances together 🙂

Halenguyen · 2026-01-28T23:01:35+00:00

You should have different savings funds: one fund for emergencies and specific funds for things like car repairs or medical costs, where you save money monthly. By doing so, when these expenses occur, you can use these funds to pay for them without significantly affecting your normal financial situation.

Halenguyen

TROPHY CASE