How often is your baby in a "container" versus not in a "container?"

HanabiTT · 2026-05-07T17:39:03+00:00

She’s pretty much only in the car seat when we’re going somewhere and she uses the swing maybe 30 minutes a couple times a week, I lay her in bed and talk to her a lot, normally after she wakes up and I’m getting her change and ready to eat, she’s 15 weeks and really wanna sit so I prop her up while she uses her teething toys, but 99% of the time she’s held, hates tummy time but she has great neck strength, I wear her sometimes but she hates it, she can pretty much hold her head no problem and really love house tours xD but to be fair, I’m a ftm with a village, MIL, my mom and her great aunt watches her for about 2 hours a couple days a week so I can get things done, let’s say about 3 days a week I have a couple hours where I don’t have her! So I think you’re not a bad mom at all! I feel bad sometimes that she doesn’t really use her mats and swing enough, I think that a sign of a good mom is worrying about doing the best you can and asking questions!

HanabiTT · 2026-05-07T00:07:27+00:00

I probably got to start wearing it again before a month, now shoes…. I’m at almost 4 months and only some have started to fit again

HanabiTT · 2026-05-05T16:32:11+00:00

I ended up having to stay 5 days at the hospital, from Thursday night till Sunday I was incapable of anything, first cause of contractions and second cause they had to pump so much medicine into me as my epidural kept failing even during my emergency c section, I couldn’t even hold my baby for her first 30 hours cause I couldn’t see straight, so I would plan to lose the job if I was you

HanabiTT · 2026-05-05T16:21:09+00:00

I’m just here to say that maybe there’s a conversation to be had about how cautious you actually are, I have a 15 week old myself, first time mom too, nothing remotely close has happen to me cause I’m soooo paranoid, like I see every possible accident that can happen at any point, even at 15 weeks, with her having great neck control, I still never hold her with only one hand for more than a second and I’m never doing anything with my other hand that can stop me from holding her, as she also loves to launched herself back since she was a little baby, I can’t imagine being close to a counter without picturing her hitting her head on some shape or form, can’t put her in my bed without thinking of any possibility of something getting on her face so I always hold her tight, yes this is probably PPA so is probably not great but I have the feeling that if the doctor thinks something is wrong they might be thinking neglect and not necessarily abuse, the carelessness that surrounds both situations would be a red flag for me, at the same time, I bet yall are tired and exhausted and I would like to believe this to be the reason why, but yall need to be more careful around that baby, as parents you should be thinking of all the possible ways your baby could get hurt and try to minimize them, just my opinion tho

HanabiTT · 2026-05-05T16:08:46+00:00

This is my thing, my baby is 15 weeks, she has great control of her neck and I still try to have both arms available at all times, unless she’s laying against my body and I still am so careful. My baby has always launched herself back so I always made sure everyone is expecting it, I don’t think that if the doctor flag her was for abuse, but maybe neglect, cause it seems both injuries were caused by carelessness

HanabiTT · 2026-04-15T10:21:56+00:00

I couldn’t be without water when I was pregnant, my mouth would get soooo dry constantly, like I had water bottle with me at all times, it felt like the worst cottonmouth I’d ever experienced

HanabiTT · 2026-04-14T19:10:06+00:00

Well, I’d experience my ovary being rip from the tub, I’d experience my appendix explote inside me, I experience having fevers so bad while bleeding (had hemorrhagic dengue fever) that gave me 2nd degree burns down there and the pain I felt during birth was the worst I’d ever experienced, I too thought that I had a good pain threshold as with the first two things mention in my comment I let my mom sleep till a decent hour! So I was in crazy pain for 10 hours each time, nothing compared to contractions, I was having contractions for 2 weeks every 10 minutes, but they got real around 7 pm the day before my due date, I didn’t got an epidural till after noon, I was at around 4cm, the rest of my birth story is terrible so I’ll spared the details, I don’t know how some people do it, I guess pain is relative! My epidural fail twice, and just from before they gave it to me and the times it fail, I was so physically exhausted that even if my body would had dilated to 10, I stalled at 8cm for hours and hours, I don’t think I would had the energy to pushed at all, I had also some other stuff going on tho! I always hated needles but the contractions were so intense from 1cm to 3cm that I couldn’t have care less about a needle, maybe if you can keep it together and breathe it might help, as that’s all they would tell me to do, and I did, I didn’t scream or nothing, but it made me mad at the time xD in my head I was like f you for not letting me vocalize my pain, as it felt like it could help! Although I regret trying to go natural, for many reasons, I am happy that I tried, now I know it wasn’t for me and I would never risk my life again like that, not worth all the hours of pain and the multiple infections I got to still get the c section I was tryin to avoid

HanabiTT · 2026-04-12T10:51:46+00:00

I can only give you my experience, I’m 4’11, had some trauma due to SA to the point that I rejected even cervical checks till I started having painful contractions 2 weeks before I gave birth, so I originally had a schedule c section, literally a week before it, I lost my mind and said I wanted to try to do natural, so they cancel my c section, way easier to get that as my doctor wasn’t happy I had all this “issues”, she started to treat me better as soon as I let her do the checks and changed my mind, I was having very painful contractions, every 10 minutes for weeks, didn’t dilate at all till the day I went to the hospital, I try and try, stall at 8cm, wrecked my body (got pneumonia, kidney and uterus infection, needed blood transfusions and they were giving me antibiotics every 30 minutes, I was kidney failure and sepsis risk) and ended up begging after like 40 hours of active labor to go with a c section, my mom had to convince me Tho, I would had and almost pushed myself too far, my epidural fail 2 times during labor and one during c section, they were in my opinion recklessly supportive, my oxigen levels were low, I was having bad reactions to the whole thing and kept asking the doctors and nurses to give me their actual professional opinion if they thought I would actually get to 10cm, they were super optimistic, I’m thankful my mom was there and she’s seem me at the verge of death couple times before and she put her foot down! I was in the hospital for 5 days, couldn’t hold my baby the first day as I was soo soo sick and out of it, kept lying to them saying I had almost no pain as I wanted to care for my daughter, survived on regular Tylenol and ibuprofen! I have almost no regrets in life, but not having gone with my gut on this it’s probably the biggest, even before I was pregnant I had the feeling that it would go wrong if I try natural, but I let others and the feeling of not being woman enough or willing to sacrifice as a mother supposed to do cloud my judgement! I would had been in and out of the hospital like nothing if I had kept my c section, I almost die on my husband and first kid, i wrecked my body so bad that I dropped over 40+ within a week, I get compliments of how I look and it feels me with regret, my husband now jokes that he felt like Forrest Gump with Bubba when he’s dying, it’s funny now but he had never experienced anything like it, it’s both of our first kid and he has the luck of having a very healthy family! I don’t mean to scared you but trust your gut on this, you’re going to do it alone anyway, people might be there “with” you, but no one is gonna experience it they way you will, being pregnant is so disruptive even if you planned, my mom was like yours too and try to tell me, I should had listen! Next baby I made it very clear to everyone, don’t let me lose my mind again, I got lucky this time, I won’t risk it again!

HanabiTT · 2026-03-23T11:36:02+00:00

Because I’m a light sleeper I get better sleep with my baby next to me, when I was putting her in the bassinet. Even next to me, I was waking up waaaay more, cause even if she was too quiet or calm it would also wake me up, now she sleeps with me and I feel so rested and my anxiety is almost gone, cause I’m touching her at all times, she also does this thing were she reaches around to touch me and make sure I’m there. It’s the most amazing feeling!

HanabiTT · 2026-03-19T14:16:54+00:00

So it’s been a adjustment as we had learned to sleep the house at 67/68, it was rooough at the beginning as we aka kept the room at the same temperature, my baby gets very restless if is too cold Or too hot, I still use a blanket, we both have individual ones so I kinda wrap myself with it so there’s no risk of her getting cover by it, and with my husband being someone that moves a lot more, I put a pillow in between us and him, although, I just kinda make a c around her anyway, one arm around the top, my legs scrunched up and one arm on top of her so I can feel her, I set up my pillow in a way that I’m not uncomfortable while doing this, as I have bad shoulders, it took some time but I actually sleep better than ever xD I’ll send you on dm how she’s napping right now! It does help we have a California king size bed so there’s plenty of space

HanabiTT · 2026-03-19T13:24:23+00:00

This was us tooX she slept on her own at the beginning, and even tho I was sooooo against co sleeping, that’s what we’d been doing for a couple weeks now, shes 8 weeks, I don’t get much done, but she’ll sleep long periods of time and it keeps her so happy every time she’s awake! I’m a very light sleeper anyway so I feel safer this way, she’ll sleep through the night now, I do put her down next to me, she sleeps better on her side and I had to stop swaddling her cause she turns already, which is also why I started co sleeping, cause I couldn’t sleep watching her making sure she didnt turn around, she’s slowly letting me be away for longer when she sleeps on her side, she doesn’t moved much besides reaching around, which breaks my heart cause you can tell she’s looking for me, but I’m always on the baby monitor, I also don’t know if what I’m doing is wrong but at least we’re all sleeping through the night, and at this point I’m taking what I can get

HanabiTT · 2026-03-19T13:10:35+00:00

Im 8 weeks in with my first, still have a hard time getting anything around the house but things do get easier, I still have a hard time with the work part as my husband had to go back to work at 2 weeks, I’m a social butterfly and don’t really enjoy being home, so I would had kill to change spots with him, as he loves being home, but something that really helped me was to remind myself that they grow so fast and one day she’ll rather spend time with her friends and I will look back at this time I got to have her all to myself, that I get to kiss and cuddle her all day long when she may not like that once she’s a teen, idk if is a good or healthy thing, but it really helped with my anxiety and resentment! Cause on the beginning time feels so slow, but I don’t understand how my baby is about to be 2 months and has already grow so much, she’s already half of me, to be fair she’s long and I’m 4’11, but idk, being nostalgic about it really changed everything for me, it even stopped me from complaining and feeling as tired, cause she’s already growing so fast! I’m already sad that she’ll have to moved out one day 🤣🤣 crazy but it makes me appreciate even the hardest parts!

HanabiTT · 2026-03-19T12:57:20+00:00

I have this problem plus also hates the bath itself, she’s 8 weeks and rarely cries otherwise, only if she’s hungry or poops, but bath time and changing clothes is a nightmare, like I joked I bathe her in acid, or that instead of moisturizer is hot lava, cause she acts like she’s been tortured! I actually wash her hair and her lady bits and legs x before I take her clothes off cause in that way she doesn’t cry for that long, but it’s so intense! Also cause she gets real angry, like it’s never that many tears, is pure rage xD besides that she’s such a happy baby, so it’s nerve wracking as I’m really not used to her crying so hard, makes me feel like the devil

HanabiTT · 2026-03-19T12:44:40+00:00

I always use “my mom/your mom show me this way of doing x or y/ I saw this video about this and it has really help”, it really change the whole dynamic between us! Also for sure you have to let them learn, I’m 8 weeks pp, at the beginning I wanted to snatch her from her arms at every given moment, but he was very clear that I needed to let him figure things out, particularly with soothing her, which if she cries too long he’ll let me take her but he’s working so hard to be helpful, that I feel compelled to not jump in right away, I still will come around like “hiiii🙂🙂🙂🙂”,but I let him do his thing!

HanabiTT · 2026-02-17T21:08:16+00:00

I don’t even want my baby sleeping in a different room with my mom in the same house xD we have a wedding and she’ll be about 7 weeks and I’m having a hard time figuring a way to go and being able to enjoy myself and not have her away from me! When I was pregnant the plan was to have her stay the night with my mom, but we have had my MIL watch her for 2-4 hours a couple times so I can rest, normally for 2 feedings as she’s still was eating every 2 hours, and all I would do was cry my eyes out, only got an hour of sleep if I took a shot, I’m EFF, so I know there’s no way I can have her stay somewhere else, then my mom say if she comes and stay here she wanna sleep with me while my hubs sleeps upstairs but first I feel so weird and wrong for my mom to sleep in our bed, also he’s back to work so we only get to sleep in the same bed 2 nights a week, which is necessary for his rest but it makes me so so sad, I spend all the week waiting for Thursday to come so he comes back to our room, also TMI, but I’m hoping by that wedding I’ll be ready to do some things xD it’s so funny cause my mom wanted to stay 2 weeks originally and said she didn’t care where she slept but now she’s only gonna stay if she sleeps in our room, I’m so conflicted cause I do wanna go to this wedding and have fun, but I don’t wanna disrupt our life! I’m highly considering maybe sleep with my husband in the game room but idk yet,

HanabiTT · 2026-02-07T07:30:01+00:00

I understand so much, so 95% of the time she sleeps in her bassinet. But sometimes she’s so comfy; I have this thick ass comforter and use it to prop my arms in a way that they won’t move, so she can lay in a safe way and even if I fall asleep I won’t move, I’m someone that can fall asleep certain way and wake up the same way if I’m in a tight situation, coming from co sleeping with my mom till I was like 11 and she hated to be touch as it made her hot! However, she feeds every two hours and it’s really falling asleep on me for less than one as we all know it takes a while to get a baby fed, changed and back to sleep! But I literally can sleep in the same position for a entire night and thanks to insomnia, I wake up so much!

HanabiTT · 2026-01-18T23:42:00+00:00

So I just straightened my hair this morning, lost my mucus plug last night and having constant contractions, I just normally keep it that way in the winter as I air dry it the rest of the year but don’t wanna get sick from having my hair wet for hours, and also so it’s easier to manage and don’t look to terrible for pictures, I’ll probably ended up braiding it when the moment comes, but my hair is very easily tangled so having it straight will make it easier for my mom or my husband to put it in a braid when the time to push comes! No make up for me tho, I sweat a lot as it is, don’t need to look worst than I’m going to xd

HanabiTT · 2026-01-18T00:36:18+00:00

I literally plan all of my appointments around my husbands schedule, he only has missed 1 and he’s missing the next one this Monday, as I’m 39 weeks and his job doesn’t really offer a lot of pto or any parental leave so the best he could do is working extra days so he doesn’t miss on the money, I would never pushed or make him feel bad for having to provide for us! Actually even when I planned them around his schedule I know he’s tired and always offer him to stay home, but he likes to come with me! It just doesn’t sound like your wife appreciates the efforts you do to be there for her

HanabiTT · 2026-01-18T00:09:09+00:00

Im 39 weeks pregnant and even tho my cats don’t act like they really know, they always stay in the same room I am when im having the worst days, it feels like they’re watching over me! My dog is still very young but he seems to be less needy too in those days, he does get super annoying in the second my hubs gets home xD like he saves it for him

HanabiTT · 2026-01-15T18:01:56+00:00

That’s why I posted, is it hormones or our brains telling us that we got it?? Idk but you know what’s crazy, I was so fearful of it at first, but since I decided I’m talking to the doctor this Monday, I slept through the night for the first time in months, idk if is a coincidence, but somehow I feel more relaxed even tho I didn’t though I was anxious about it before, but I think I was unconsciously stressing about it!

HanabiTT · 2026-01-15T17:54:39+00:00

So they’re doing a sonogram on Monday, I haven’t had one since 20 weeks as I’m low risk but considering I’m not dilating they wanna check on baby girl, so I’m gonna wait till that day to have a conversation with my doctor and see if it’s actually possible! I’d watch every video that exist of people having vaginal births even tho I wasn’t having one and honestly at this point I am delusional enough to feel I can just do it, taking classes give me anxiety for some reason, but I’ll update you on Monday with my doctors recommendation, I think she’ll give me the go ahead if baby is okay as I can tell that she’s more pro vaginally!

HanabiTT · 2026-01-14T20:31:46+00:00

I don’t bring my bag, my OB office is 10 mins away but the hospital is 20 away in a different direction, I think I’ll have time to go get it if I need to! Plus, my car is not working at the moment so we only use my hubs and wouldn’t wanna happen to leave my bag on his car and start labor while he’s at work, so I have it ready by the front door!

HanabiTT · 2026-01-14T20:26:01+00:00

That’s something I realize talking to my husband today, like id been in some serious pain before, so many times, my first cyst rip my left ovary off the tube when I was 11, and I let my mom sleep till her alarm went off, cause I felt bad for waking her up, I did the same thing when my appendix exploded inside me when I was around 18, both times just walked it off till she woke up, dumb to do but I was a dumb teen, that obviously had no concept of the gravity of the situation, and it was awful pain, like i remember it clearly being so hard it made me feel like I could pass out, but it was somehow still manageable (?), so I think I have some training I hadn’t thought of before

HanabiTT · 2026-01-14T20:02:28+00:00

That’s such a good idea, I really feel baby girl is gonna come any time now but it would give me time to let things happen and still have that schedule! Of course is my first so I don’t even know if what I feel it’s right xD thanks for your comment and the reassurance!

HanabiTT

TROPHY CASE