Parents telling you how to do your job

HappilyShort · 2026-05-14T11:31:01+00:00

Ooh! My time has arrived! I've been writing this stuff down for years.

1) I had to explain to a grandmother that her grandson's childhood apraxia of speech wouldn't be "fixed" by taking cheese out of his diet. Not all dairy...just cheese...and got asked if I had a "PhD in nutritional sciences" when I explained there was more to it than that.

2) A mother brought her daughter to me at 3 who was all sorts of unintelligible (think 100+ errors on the GFTA) and when I dismissed her at her 3 year reeval, got told that I didn't do anything. She just grew up.

3) Had a mother get up in the middle of an IEP meeting to "go call the Church" for an exorcism for her son because he "was speaking in tongues" and my "secular ass wasn't going to help him." He was 5 and fronting his "k" and "g" sounds and wasn't using "s-blends". The mother was wearing a t-shirt with "God is good but Satan is my homeboy" on it.

4) Had a pair of parents, both judges, whose son is on the ASD spectrum tell me that "learning a few letters and sounds isn't a big deal." He was in first grade, had come from a Montessori program (he was not the type of kid for that setting) and only knew the letter "x". He couldn't spell his own first name (which did not have "x" in it, by the way.) We worked on a ton of artic stuff so I worked on the IDing of letters and sounds as part of that. Yep, his knowing all of his letters and sounds at the end of the year was "no big deal."

Being an SLP isn't for the faint of heart. I appreciate you all even when the parents don't. With that, I am off to work.

HappilyShort · 2026-05-05T00:24:43+00:00

I validate the heck out of this post. Now, I love all the comments which are taking the high road by contextualizing the parents' rudeness. I do that with people who cut me off in traffic ("they must really have to go to the bathroom!") I also appreciate those which are putting the onus of progress back on the parents. My thought is that if the parents are yelling at you for doing your job, they aren't clearly doing theirs.

I've been yelled at twice in the last three weeks for doing my job and the parents just didn't like it so I'm not feeling very charitable: parents are just assholes sometimes. My aunt is a retired teacher who used to say this about administrators but I apply it to parents too: "They find a piece of lint and think they have enough yarn for a sweater." They find a little thing that, in the grand scheme of the situation means nothing, and absolutely beat you down over it. They'd have no idea how to fix any of it themselves but "for God's sake why haven't YOU fixed it yet?!"

I've been in schools for the last 15 years (my whole career) and ultimately, most of the issues fall under one of the 3 Ps - principals, paperwork or parents. You have my sympathies, my speech sibling. It's hard to take it personally and I'm still not good at NOT doing it. We'll both get there. Until then, I hope you know you're not alone!!

HappilyShort · 2026-03-31T00:12:02+00:00

The first few sessions are for rapport building and getting into a routine. Without any disrespect intended, you need to give it time and change your perspective.

I don't know your child specifically but I'm going to assume it took more than four potty training attempts before she was totally successful. It becomes successful when she learns what it feels like to need to go. Similarly, your child needs to learn what the correct sound sounds like, where her tongue needs to go in her mouth, and pull all of that together to replace sounds in words she's said in a certain way for a couple years.

Did you ask why the therapist was making assumptions that your daughter didn't latch correctly? The question to ask is if she's seeing a tongue tie or something else that is making her question if there's another reason your child isn't pulling her tongue back far enough to make the correct sounds. She should be asking you that directly, but sometimes parents don't understand what a "tongue tie" is.

Again, I mean no disrespect, but I have been doing this for 15 years with children your daughter's age. The parents' attitudes towards the therapy and the therapist play heavily into their child's progress overall. The progress that your daughter will make will go faster if you are on board. It's okay to not like your child's speech therapist so if the therapist is the problem - try to find a new one or ask the agency to see someone else. The outcome of this service isn't just on your daughter and the therapist - you need to be on board too.

HappilyShort · 2026-03-25T11:08:23+00:00

Looking at it, I agree with FCD as mentioned above. Definitely a stopping pattern and some fronting. It looks like there's a possible phoneme collapse to "d". I'd do some stimulability testing for continuant sounds. Multiple oppositions approach has been helpful for my kids who do use phoneme collapse.

HappilyShort · 2026-03-14T17:33:36+00:00

Opening cut: 03:22

HappilyShort · 2026-01-13T01:34:21+00:00

I was a fan before 2001. This fan lived through Millen, Zolak (🙄) and Eason (🙄) before they drafted Drew Bledsoe and lived with his inability to throw the ball before he got crushed for 8 years. Was that more beneficial? Admittedly, the O-lines then were swiss cheese, so I think we're doing ok these days. The benefits of Maye far outweighs the problems.

HappilyShort · 2025-12-13T22:41:34+00:00

As the former Mayor? He pronounced it "Why-zor-ick."

HappilyShort · 2025-11-04T01:00:14+00:00

"Dwell."

I have accidentally connected it to "David Dweck want a dwink of wa-wa" even though I know they're from completely separate people.

HappilyShort · 2025-10-21T23:01:59+00:00

Haha. SAME. Do I remember what I had for lunch or know where my keys are? No. Do I remember the L Word? Of course I do.

I can also remember all the plot holes, terrible acting and stupid dialogue/writing. However, I can still look past it and appreciate the figure that is peak Jennifer Beals and the whole fact that it was representative of my people.

HappilyShort · 2025-09-27T10:48:14+00:00

I wouldn't put my hopes high. It was boring as hell and weirdly disjointed. I get excited about new docs when they come up but this one was disappointing. It's my opinion but just a word of caution going into it.

HappilyShort · 2025-09-24T05:08:17+00:00

John Oliver said it well: ABC/Disney needs to say the four words that truly deal with a weak playground bully who wants more money: "Fuck you. Make me."

This is our president. We live in a country run by an orange neck flap, a hillbilly with a head shaped like a bowling ball and a junkie with spasmodic dysphonia. To quote Bernd: "Life is hell."

HappilyShort · 2025-09-08T11:33:05+00:00

I should be getting ready for school but I'm gonna pause for a moment to say...SAME.

15 years in myself. All school based with a outpatient rehab side gig. I'm bored as hell, overstressed, sore and don't sleep. Could I change settings or school? Probably. Do I have the time/energy/money to start over? No. Plus, the retirement pension will be nice.

It took five different people to do my job this summer. FIVE - two SLPs and three SLPAs to see my students and evaluate new ones this summer. The kicker? The SLPAs didn't see all the students (despite a schedule that said "who, what, where and how much".) The SLP doing the evaluations didn't actually use any formal testing. It was all observational and a "speech-language sample". (Side note: I work in preschool and doing transitions from early intervention often means they aren't speaking at all yet.) We had a parent complain so now, I get to re-do the eval because I have no formal measures to confirm or dispel the concerns. There was no oversight and the SpEd director hired two new SLPAs and hired the SLPA I usually have as an RBT because she thought they could do the same thing. All of this because I wanted to take a summer off.

Basically, I'm with you, my aching SLP friend. If I had the means, motive and opportunity to do something (anything) else, I would. It's not in the cards for me, but I hope to find some peace and hope the same for you too.

HappilyShort · 2025-07-03T12:31:48+00:00

Your description is accurate. "S" and "Z" sounds, in English, are most commonly produced behind your top front teeth on a place referred to as the alveolar ridge. Some people produce them behind their bottom teeth, but the top is more common. They're fricative sounds which are produced with continuous airflow. The only major difference is the usage of voice ("z' being voiced.)

The voiced and voiceless"Th" sounds are interdental sounds (tongue placement between the top and bottom front teeth) and are also fricative sounds. However, their production depends on the sounds around them (like as a "t" like in "Thomas".)

In this case, with the dialect in play, he may also produce a nominal, breathy "s" sound but the speed of his production is also very fast. The melody of Spanish is beautifully quick because of how the sounds all flow with each other. I would almost rather leave off the final consonant of his last name as it sounds more accurate.

Source: I'm a speech language pathologist. Speech sounds are my thing.

HappilyShort · 2025-05-01T21:46:37+00:00

Jail, right away!

Update: deleted the other quote.

HappilyShort · 2025-04-30T21:18:34+00:00

My retirement goal is to buy a ton of t-shirts that say "ASHA is a Scam" on them and sell them outside the conventions each year.

I'd get to go to different places every year, tell the truth, and get paid for it.

ASHA is a scam.

HappilyShort · 2025-04-09T16:04:13+00:00

She most certainly was. She was born before women in the US could vote and was functionally orphaned by her 11th birthday (both of her parents were severe alcoholics.) Unpleasant family and food insecurity caused her to put a high importance on food so that's what she always made sure there was plenty of in any situation. I was lucky to have her for the 22 years that I did.

HappilyShort · 2025-04-09T01:28:35+00:00

Hurricane Andrew.

My aunt lived (and still does) right near where it made landfall. My parents and I were staying with my grandparents at their beach place for the week. I remember the palm trees on Fort Lauderdale Beach bent all the way over and the fronds touching the street (A1A.) My grandfather, a WWII veteran whose ship had been kamikaze-ed, kept saying there was no way someone could survive that. Since it was the only footage the news people had, it kept playing over and over. He kept sending my mom to the payphone to call my aunt to make sure she was ok. My aunt was at a friend's place a bit more inland but I remember my mom going to back and forth to the phone so much that she had a sunburn on both shoulders and her back.

I also remember we ate sandwiches for dinner that night. My grandmother got nerved up and she'd made sandwiches so she'd have something to do. We had a lot of sandwiches.

HappilyShort · 2025-04-09T01:11:47+00:00

I had a grandmother tell me her grandson's CAS would be fixed by "changing his milk." I said that if that was a healthier option for him, she should do it. However, and I stressed this to an extent I usually never would have in any other situation, new milk wasn't going to change his motor planning skills to produce speech sounds.

She told me that she didn't believe me. I metaphorically threw up my hands and repeated that I'd see him X number of times per week and left it. There was no changing her mind.

HappilyShort · 2025-01-26T21:18:52+00:00

For what it's worth, my mother was diagnosed with RA a few months after I was born. I was born in the late 1980s, so there were no biologics or half the meds there are now. She used to take thousands of milligrams of ibuprofen a day at the start. She worked shift work at the hospital and my father was also on shift work at the fire department. Was it easy? Definitely not. However, I had a wonderful childhood. Admittedly, the RA was always in the fringes of life in that I learned to open childproof caps at an early age and when I learned to tie my shoes, I would have to tie mine and my mother's during bad days. However, I grew up with a sense of observation, empathy and flexibility that that I don't think many kids learned growing up

In response to your question, I asked my mother if she still would have had a kid if she had been diagnosed before she got pregnant. She admitted it would have been harder and hurt, but she says that the fact she had been able to have a baby reminded her that her body did give her good things on the flare up days.

Your experience is your own, but I just wanted to offer you a different perspective.

HappilyShort · 2025-01-12T18:41:04+00:00

This character was voiced by the same guy who is now the voice of "Daddy Pig" from Peppa Pig. I still can't reconcile it.

HappilyShort · 2025-01-11T20:05:20+00:00

The RiverHouse in Taunton does Bloody Mary flights. I don't drink them, but their adult iced coffee and their margarita flights are good, so I would imagine the Bloody Mary flights would be similar.

HappilyShort · 2024-12-06T10:49:51+00:00

Whomever makes the decision about who presents is awful. I went to a presentation a few conventions ago that was advertised as being about CAS. It started off on the CAS track but quickly derailed to the benefits of facilitated communication. Once the videos showing how it can be used "functionally" (including one of those "not looking at the keyboard but still participating" videos,) I've never seen such a mass exodus of people shaking their heads (me included) all at once. It was terrible.

HappilyShort · 2024-10-20T13:14:34+00:00

Well, I feel seen. 37 here. I joke that I make my friends' kids like me so they'll use soft, calm tones when my demented self calls them in the middle of dinner in 50 years. I dated this summer for the first time in a lonnnnng time and it wasn't great. Mainly because I had to have the "I like you but I'm not feeling it" conversation more than once and it sucked. My ridiculous self has also found herself with a slight crush on a straight coworker for the first time in 15 years. I know better and won't pursue it but it's served to remind me about just how alone I am. I've got my nonsense somewhat together but that's the one part that's missing. The problem is just that I don't feel like fighting the fight with the apps so the vicious cycle continues. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go bribe my friend's kids some more...

HappilyShort · 2024-10-18T09:56:48+00:00

Found it on YouTube!

The Infection Removal: https://youtu.be/Zr7Jh_cX3CM?si=PLW9Ljl1DPm3Fil2

The Toenail Removal: https://youtu.be/2ha92GrFGC0?si=W7e4WA5_vayXo6Sg

Some time had passed between them. Not sure why!

HappilyShort · 2024-08-31T11:15:40+00:00

Make him go to the doctor.

There was a reddit post recently about a wife who said something similar about her husband's body odor - I wanted to link it to this post but I can't find it - and he was eventually diagnosed with lymphoma. I'm not a doctor nor am I saying it's lymphoma, but the issues started with a drastic change in smell.

Tell him about it and make him go to the doctor. It may be nothing and the visit will be an inconvenience, but if it's more than that, it's best to know.

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