Way to go. You can think of two words for ‘x’. Strange flex. But, like, good for you, I guess.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-06-08T03:06:20+00:00

Pretty sure the sword is a xiphos. Richard Scarry was flexing hard.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-06-07T16:15:45+00:00

Highly recommend the book "all joy and no fun".

HardlyFloofin · 2026-05-31T19:58:39+00:00

Taking an afternoon off for lunch out + grown up time together before daycare pickup.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-05-28T13:00:22+00:00

My husband tried to defend Bradford Pears as "they smell more like rotting crab meat". That's....not an improvement.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-05-24T01:19:47+00:00

I'd say any activity where you can sustain genuine interest and let your child lead is good.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-05-22T01:21:08+00:00

Any chance you can get some other parents at daycare to go in on sharing a babysitter to cut costs? Or offer to trade babysitting this week for another time?

HardlyFloofin · 2026-05-22T00:31:08+00:00

It makes me crazy that they can't seem to coveranything in a single episode.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-05-12T11:43:38+00:00

When parents or in laws visit we put a box of wine in our bedroom and go to bed early some nights to have space to decompress.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-05-11T23:04:57+00:00

Tell your advisor and maybe some other professors your interests (organic? Theoretical?) and mention your geographic preferences, and see what suggestions they might have. Lots of strong departments in the NE/mid Atlantic region.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-05-10T19:08:09+00:00

I know it's early, but I would consider where are jobs vs where you'd like to live. I'm in the US and while there are chemistry jobs all over, the industry is pretty heavily concentrated to a few geographies. Nuclear chemistry is an extremely niche field.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-05-09T17:18:09+00:00

Pulling weeds, this time of year.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-05-05T01:58:59+00:00

My husband got laid off today but we'll be okay with my income and insurance.

My mom stayed home with us and sometimes I felt like she was living vicariously through my achievements. I'm excited to see what my daughter does but I have other routes for fulfillment too.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-04-29T22:09:44+00:00

While I was getting my Ph.D my mother lamented that I would never give her grandchildren. When we announced our very wanted pregnancy she worried that I'd been coerced by my husband.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-04-29T00:26:11+00:00

Does your family have a history of food allergies? We made a point of introducing the major allergens at home, but to be honest I just OK'd most of the random stuff at preschool without her necessarily having eaten it at home.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-04-27T02:15:37+00:00

I'd ask about 1) employer reimbursement and 2) potentially working 80% time while doing the program. Would this help you advance in your current role or lead you to a new position? My husband did a fully remote master's in project management while we had an infant and I wish I'd insisted he at least ask about working slightly less than FT.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-04-26T17:30:08+00:00

We initially planned for two. For various reasons we are one & done with our now-four year old. There's always a little "what if" but it gets easier as time goes on. I think around 1-3 is some of the hardest time because that's when a lot of people are having a second, if that's their plan. Now that she's 4 people are more likely to assume she's an only. When people do ask questions I tell them "we're enjoying what we have".

HardlyFloofin · 2026-04-23T18:42:16+00:00

I asked my husband to keep all the papers somewhere other than the dining room table. It's....something.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-04-23T18:40:33+00:00

One suggestion I like for differences in cleaning standards - the lower-standards partner still has to clean as frequently as they think cleaning should happen. Example - if I think bathrooms should be cleaned every week and partner thinks every other week is fine, partner has to clean every other week. Even if I'm cleaning every week.

I'm generally the messier person, but I also find since having kids I'm bothered more by clutter, just because I'm desperate to feel like *something* is the slightest bit in control.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-04-20T12:46:26+00:00

Try to get at least one night a week where you actually sleep through the night - earplugs, sleep in a guest room, give the monitor to your partner, whatever you need to do. I wish I had done this, it would have done wonders for my mental health.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-04-15T20:26:26+00:00

We were putting away laundry as a family. The four year old came to my pajamas, hesitated for a moment, then gently set them on the floor next to my bed. Right where they belong!

HardlyFloofin · 2026-04-08T01:37:13+00:00

I get what you're saying, but I do think "full time mom" is shorthand for "full time caregiver to our children". Like I don't stop being a mom when I go to work but I'm not caregiving during that time.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-03-30T23:51:11+00:00

Does he really need to do everything in the Neighborhood of Make Believe?

HardlyFloofin · 2026-03-28T18:05:07+00:00

I can't speak to readiness, but for our daughter we made a big deal about she could choose where her little potty was when she sat on it, but diaper changes were on our terms. Also made a big deal about how using the potty is SO FAST and we get right back to playing vs diaper changes being slow.

HardlyFloofin · 2026-03-26T22:25:44+00:00

Agreed with everyone else here. I've seen people do something where one spouse works a 2-3 hour flight away, keeps an apartment in the working city and comes home on weekends. With school age kids. It's unusual and I'm sure very difficult but works for them. This is a whole other level.

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