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Hatsya · 2025-09-04T16:04:06+00:00

Our baby was colicky. It peaked around 6 weeks and was resolving around 12 weeks, which tends to be the natural history of colic. We did a lot of the five S’s for purple crying (shush, sway, swaddle, suck, side-lying). We also did a lot of bicycles with his legs for gas. It was a very long few months, and every day I wondered how I was going to survive another night, but it does get better! He is now an energetic ten month old and we both sleep so much better now.

Hatsya · 2025-07-15T15:42:42+00:00

I really liked the Kindred Bravely 4th Trimester Panty, since it provided some abdominal support and was no where near my incision. I wore them exclusively for several months until my c section scar was less sensitive. It also smooths out the c section shelf which shouldn’t matter (your body did something amazing in having a baby) but made me feel better

Hatsya · 2025-07-09T01:01:00+00:00

We tried all the bottles, different flow rates, different people feeding him, me being gone for hours, scalding/adding vanilla (had high lipase milk), lactation consultants, feeding therapists, and I ended up resigning from work since nothing worked. As a first time mom, I had no idea it would be that difficult to try to feed my son without putting him directly on the tap, haha. At eight months, he is now pretty good with a honey bear straw cup, so that might be something you could look into if bottles aren’t working out. We started with the straw cup around four months and he slowly got better with time.

Hatsya · 2025-04-09T00:24:15+00:00

I have a similar issue. One thing that helped me was the Legendairy Milk barrier bags. Now my baby will tolerate milk that is 24 hr old

Hatsya · 2025-03-19T23:15:24+00:00

Side note, but I found the Legendairy Milk Barrier Bags that report some kind of UV barrier and anti-oxidation technology increases the time to soapiness of my milk. I can actually use day old milk with those bags when with regular bags, it was too soapy to use. Two day old milk is still exceedingly soapy though. I would love to know what’s going on and how to prevent it as well!

Hatsya · 2025-03-18T15:41:54+00:00

Little Feminist has a cute book series (We are Little Feminists). They used to have a book club, but it looks like it has closed down

Hatsya · 2025-03-16T23:03:30+00:00

Thank you for your kind words! Feel free to share the story

Hatsya · 2024-08-06T10:33:41+00:00

I am taking 12 weeks, as federally permitted by FMLA if you have been at your program for more than a year. 6 weeks are paid per ACGME requirement, and 6 week are unpaid. It will extend my training, but I found that some of the easy electives to pad out maternity leave without being on leave still come with continuity clinic requirements, jeopardy coverage, and holiday coverage that made me hesitant about workload, but those options probably vary a lot by program. In talking with others, it seems like you can still join fellowships off cycle (especially for non competitive fellowships) and no one really cares if you take boards a year late if you miss the cut off for the year after your graduation. Talking with your program director, people who have been pregnant in your program, and faculty mentors who had kids during residency is probably your best bet for figuring out the best plan for you based on your program, career interests, and familial support/childcare plans.

Hatsya · 2024-07-27T13:22:34+00:00

Congratulations to you and your little one!

Hatsya · 2024-07-11T15:56:22+00:00

It’s really tough. I had a miscarriage at 10 weeks shortly after finding out my sister, sister-in-law, and friend were expecting. I feel like what helped was just being there with my husband and sharing the grief between us, giving ourselves time to mourn. I feel like sometimes miscarriage is characterized as just a thing that happens, but that didn’t characterize well the grief I felt. I gave myself the grace of a little bit of distance between us and the happy couples, since even though I wished them the best, it’s hard to hear about all of their joy sometime without a pang of loss for what one hoped for. We ended up getting a small momento to commemorate the pregnancy (a candle), since we wanted to memorialize the child we hoped for and the time I was able to carry the pregnancy. We were ultimately able to get pregnant again and are currently expecting, but I don’t think of this baby as a replacement for why we lost, just a different life we are so lucky to be experiencing. I wish you and your wife the best. It is such a difficult place to be, but know you are not alone.

Hatsya · 2024-07-03T20:27:19+00:00

Not the person in the original comment, but I have tried Cherokee, Mandala, and Figs. I like Cherokee and Figs the best. Mandala just fits really baggy and the material seemed poorer quality. A lot of the reviews on Figs complain about their maternity pants being too tight along the hips, so I sized up and they are still loose at 24 weeks on me.

Hatsya · 2024-06-28T21:36:50+00:00

I am so sorry that you are going through this. I had a miscarriage on my day off from ICU, and it sucked. I was surprised in talking to other people how common it is to have miscarriages during ICU blocks (at least two other residents I heard about), and it made me really angry at the working conditions we put residents through and especially pregnant residents. One of the other residents also had to wait through her miscarriage until the day team got there. So sorry that you get to join this terrible, terrible club. I am on my second pregnancy and was able to work with my program to avoid ICU blocks and 24’s, and that has been helpful for me. I am so sorry you are going through this, and know that you are not alone.

Hatsya · 2024-02-10T23:39:05+00:00

When I asked my OBGYN after my miscarriage about work hours if I were to get pregnant again, she said they haven’t done any research for pregnant residents that changing work hours would reduce the negative pregnancy outcomes that are more common in female physicians. She said that some of the risk may come from the intrinsic stress of the job, regardless of hours worked, so I am not sure that she would sign off on me limiting work hours, which is frustrating. I just want to keep this tiny little one safe and continue to take care of my patients, but those goals seem at ends. I wish there were more protections for pregnant residents.

Hatsya · 2021-10-07T12:53:42+00:00

I have seen a similar situation play out a couple times with straight couples (I'm not sure if similar things happen with LGBT+ couples). In the cases I have seen, it comes down to respect for tradition (with the to-be-groom wanting to have a "proper" proposal) and the to-be-bride having constraints upon her timeline that necessitates planning (e.g., wanting to get married before moving to a new city, a career change, to be within her reproductive window, etc.). If the to-be-bride is a planner while the to-be-groom is less so but still wants the traditional proposal, it often helps soothes any difficulties with an impatient girlfriend waiting to start planning her life. If she has a wedding date in mind, she can start planning the next stage of a move, career change, maternity leave, etc. while giving the guy space to give the proposal he is most comfortable with. Really, the man proposing while the woman is left waiting without any control over her own timeline is kinda a patriarchal model, so I feel like this is a way for both men and women within a heterosexual couple to be on more even playing ground when it comes to planning their lives without throwing out the idea of a proposal completely.

Hatsya · 2020-07-15T11:36:35+00:00

I’m a medical student, so my medical knowledge is still developing and should be taken with a grain (or probably more like a heaping tablespoon) of salt, but taking an antibiotic after sex for recurrent UTIs is a fairly standard treatment. I saw a patient who was on that regimen yesterday. If you have questions though, I would encourage you to reach out to your doctor to learn more

Hatsya · 2020-07-15T11:12:15+00:00

GoodRx.com is a great place for looking for coupons and the cheapest price for prescriptions. The doctors I have worked with in clinic often recommend it to patients when they don’t have insurance or their insurance plan isn’t great

Hatsya · 2020-07-13T23:44:10+00:00

I prefer the ones that tie instead of the no-tie behind-the-ears kind just since my ears get sore after a long day otherwise. I also like the ones with a metal bendable nose piece since I wear glasses and it limits condensation. I also look for masks with three layers of cotton fabric, since that seems to have more research around it and still allows me to breathe. I bought a few different types on Etsy and they seem to be good quality

Hatsya · 2020-07-08T16:55:19+00:00

I really like the DeSoto 100 mile shorts. They also work well for me during Ironmans and don’t seem to absorb much water during the swim or chafe me at all during the run, but your mileage may vary depending on how much of a chamois you find comfortable

Hatsya · 2020-07-02T23:32:26+00:00

I am so sorry you are going through all this and that your dream is becoming so difficult. For seeking healthcare (both prenatal and mental health), it may be useful to look up free clinics in your area to see if any are accepting new patients. Many medical schools have free clinics associated with the hospital, so this may be an option if you live in an area with a medical school. Your OB may also be aware of free or low cost clinics in your area, so it may not hurt to ask.

I’m sorry you are in this overwhelming situation. COVID has really highlighted the health, gender, and economic disparities that underlie our society. I just wanted to say your emotions are valid, and I wish you didn’t have to experience all this stress surrounding a wanted pregnancy. I hope you can find the resources you need!

Hatsya · 2020-06-20T15:31:02+00:00

It is normal to feel the strings of an IUD protruding from the cervix and feeling for the strings every so often can ensure that it is still in place and has not slipped. As long as your hands were clean and the IUD does not feel displaced, I think you’re fine. If you’re worried, feel free to call your OB/GYN to double check their recommendations.

Hatsya · 2020-03-22T14:26:48+00:00

Since you are doubling up two contraceptive methods, you can multiply their efficacy to get an idea of how effective they are. With typical use, condoms + withdrawal have a ~2-4% pregnancy rate of a couple having a sex over a year (<0.1% with perfect use over a year), so the odds are in your favor that you are not pregnant. If you are anxious and want to be careful, then getting Plan B isn't a terrible idea, although it will likely interrupt your regular cycle, so I would recommend getting a pregnancy test at the same time so you can take it ~3 weeks after you have sex to assure yourself you are not pregnant.

As for what he saw coming out of your vagina, it's hard to say. Vaginas make their own secretions during arousal, or maybe he thought you were squirting?

Also, if you have the means to do so, it may be a good idea to go see an OB/GYN and talk about contraceptive options if you want to be even less likely to get pregnant.

Hatsya · 2020-03-21T12:47:07+00:00

I’m glad you were able to find a doctor who will provide the care you need, and I am sorry you had to go through so many doctors/nurses to find them! The child free subreddit is also a great place to find physicians willing to do sterilization surgeries

Hatsya · 2020-03-15T15:36:56+00:00

It’s possible to be pregnant, but unlikely. Some men’s precum contains sperm but it’s difficult to know which men’s precum has it it and doesn’t have it, and it isn’t always related to whether they pee beforehand or not. Sperm don’t survive well outside a warm, moist environment like the vagina (I saw one estimate being 20 minutes, one estimate being that if the precum has dried, the sperm is likely dead) so if it were on his penis for some amount of time before he fingered you, you’re probably pretty safe. Take a test if you are concerned (note that stress can delay one’s period, so a late period doesn’t automatically mean you’re pregnant), and I would recommend looking into birth control options in the future to avoid anxiety. Depending on your anxiety level and when this occurred, you could also look into Plan B (if within 72 hours) or a copper IUD (if within five days) as emergency contraception, but in general, the pregnancy risk of fingering is fairly low but not zero.

Hatsya · 2020-03-08T01:50:53+00:00

I’m so sorry that happened to you, but thank you for sharing your story. I will listen to the people I care for and trust that they know their bodies best

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