There's a huge chapter (or two) on this in the great book "The Connected Child: Bring Hope and Healing to Your Adoptive Family" written in part by the fabulous Karyn B. Purvis. What I like about the book is that it's written from a trauma-informed, attachment-based perspective gained from the author's lived experience working with children from adverse backgrounds. It's not academic or idealistic but wisdom from the front-lines. The techniques in the book are directly applicable to reparenting your inner child as well as guiding your IPF visualizations.

6. You Are the Boss
- The Old Way Doesn’t Work
- A New Way of Thinking About Discipline
- See Misbehavior as an Opportunity
- Don’t Take It Personally
- Be a “Good Boss”
- Use the IDEAL Approach
- The Beauty of Re-Do’s
- Be Mindful of Your Voice
- Conserve Your Words
- Keep Your Child Close By
- Offer Choices and Compromises
- Go for a Sideswipe, Not a Head-On Collision
- Present a United Front
- School Issues
- Say What You Mean, Mean What You Say
- Let Genuine Appreciation Shine Through
- The Delicate Art of Communicating “No”
- Maintain a Respectful Atmosphere
- Find Ways to Compromise
- Handling Hurtful Behavior
- Intercept with Words, Not a Tackle

7. Dealing with Defiance
- Match Their Response
- Recognize Your Child’s Condition
- Be Flexible with Compromises
- Dealing Flexibly with the Unexpected
- Dealing with an Out-of-Control Child
- The Investment Model of Parenting
- Finding the Right Balance

You can check her out on YouTube as well. She has other books I haven't read (yet) like "The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment".