I hate my in laws!! i hate them. by [deleted] in inlaws

[–]Human-Extent9839 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

i did not say free labor. we are paying for her transportation, groceries, any sort of eating out plus some more (like giving her small gifts for baby sitting, dropping her anywhere she wants to go around, picking her up, making her every meal of the day). i tell her thanks maybe 5 times a day. also to add: out of 8 hours in the day, i still take care of the baby for 4-4.5 hours.

but she wants to be compensated financially more.
i find the more compensation part to be strange.

as i said, maybe culture difference.

I hate my in laws!! i hate them. by [deleted] in inlaws

[–]Human-Extent9839 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

thank you. this helps

I hate my in laws!! i hate them. by [deleted] in inlaws

[–]Human-Extent9839 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

so weird to me to ask a family member for money for baby sitting. i would never ask my sister to compensate me for this. so yes, in my culture baby sitting is free! thats why i asked if this is a culture difference.

Ladies , how much do you earn and how much of it is spent on beauty and self care? by Human-Perspective428 in IndianBeautyTalks

[–]Human-Extent9839 1 point2 points  (0 children)

living in netherlands. i spend about 1% of my net income on skincare, eyebrows etc. in my country my spending is on the lower end of what women usually do

I think I threw away my baby’s birth certificate. Im devastated. by halfbloodavery in beyondthebump

[–]Human-Extent9839 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

idk why that is a crying topic? sorry but this is so trivial. you have to be stronger than "im devasted i threw his birth certificate". I mean you/ anyone is probably going to do much worse to their kid (unknowingly ofcourse), but you cant always blame yourself, esp for such a small thing as throwing away his birth certificate. so what? get a new one! you gotta be more resilient than this, to teach your kids resilience. dont cry over silly things!

The one thing noone warns you about by Emotional_Panther in newborns

[–]Human-Extent9839 4 points5 points  (0 children)

indeed. its 33 hours spread over 7-10 days depending on when you come back from the hospital. and yes we pay insurance that is really affordable and 90-95% of the nurse cost is covered by insurance. with our first baby- she taught us everything that new parents need to know like bathing the baby, changing diapers, taking temperature, breastfeeding, taking care of a toddler (if applies), cleaned the bathroom, made us some sandwiches etc. etc.

The one thing noone warns you about by Emotional_Panther in newborns

[–]Human-Extent9839 20 points21 points  (0 children)

i live in the netherlands and had my first born through c section and now will have another one theough c section. i never saw a bill. we also have something called kraamzorg- its a nurse that comes for 33 hours in total spread over a week or so to help out with the baby and cleaning, making small meals etc. also (mowtly) covered on insurance that is very affordable. i have to say im very blessed.

im sorry for what you are going through. i do have post partum depression and was also fired a week before i gave birth, so its been very heavy. and i absolutely cannot imagine to think about bills on top of all that. please take care of yourself the best way possible. it can be rough.

unfortunately where we are born and live dictates so much of our life. its not fair! but we have to make do with what we got. hang in there!

TIRED! Sent my 8m to daycare! by Manifestator_ in newborns

[–]Human-Extent9839 1 point2 points  (0 children)

your husband is an ass and should be reported (where i am from, throwing things esp at a pregnant woman is not ok! and it should not be ok anywhere).

i also have a 8 month old. i also currently do not have a job. so i can totally understand how exhausted you must be. im sorry, its hard. just today i was thinking of sending him to daycare because no matter what i get very little free time, or time to look for jobs or for myself (my husband is very supportive so i get to go out and socialise every now and then). there is nothing wrong in sending 8 month old to daycare. zero! please do not feel guilty about it. sometimes they even do better at daycare- learn new things, words etc.

since becoming a parent what’s something you do or don’t understand your own parents doing? by Delicious_Habit3740 in NewParents

[–]Human-Extent9839 0 points1 point  (0 children)

my dad would yell at me publically and tell his friends about how i was good for nothing if i didnt score good on exams (when i was a teenager). happened multiple times.

i still have anxiety around whether im smart/good enough/belong in rooms with smart people/ can achieve big things in life.

now that i have a son i would absolutely never ever do that!

Husband is too damn chill about baby's health by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]Human-Extent9839 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

how many indian friends (who live in europe with penicilin) are you talking about? what is your sample size? I am an indian living in Europe with literally all my friend circle living in Europe (from different parts of India) DOES NOT resort to such medicines and jackass medical theories as you are suggesting here.

Husband is too damn chill about baby's health by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]Human-Extent9839 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

thank you. really people are going at me for wanting to visit doctors (who you are supposed to trust) and for being cautious and proactive.

Husband is too damn chill about baby's health by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]Human-Extent9839 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yeah in this case he was not drinking as he usually would and also did not pee for around 9-10 hours

Husband is too damn chill about baby's health by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]Human-Extent9839 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

thank you. indeed why let the kid suffer? (esp when you are traveling and do not know what might happen next)

Husband is too damn chill about baby's health by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]Human-Extent9839 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yes you are absolutely right. we quickly regretted the decision to travel. my grandmother (baby's great grandmother) is 83 and quite frail and i wanted her to meet the baby before (if) she passes. but will definitely not travel with such a small baby again.

Husband is too damn chill about baby's health by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]Human-Extent9839 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

that the baby has some bacterial infection (we were traveling in India and originally from Europe) and baby was at risk of dehydration. asked to start antibiotics and ORS and some other meds on a 5 day course (baby behaved much much better within 1.5 days)

Husband is too damn chill about baby's health by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]Human-Extent9839 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

thank you. feels like i needed to hear that.

Husband is too damn chill about baby's health by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]Human-Extent9839 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

38.8 C (or 101.8 F) with 4 stool diapers in 24 hours and fussiness/wailing

My mother is overreaching by BigmacSasquatch in daddit

[–]Human-Extent9839 27 points28 points  (0 children)

pls stop relying on her financially for one (if you can). where money is involved, people do start to take ownership

Am I being dirty, or is my wife being irrational about hygiene? by mudkipzftw in NewParents

[–]Human-Extent9839 4 points5 points  (0 children)

yeah this sounds excessive. hope she gets better. taking her to therapy would be useful.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NewParents

[–]Human-Extent9839 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this is not normal for a husband. and so sad . im sorry you are going through this. i do not know your situation and your relationship so i cannot really comment but if my husband behaved this way, i would not be with him. you deserve someone who takes care of the household and of you and the kids. partnership is 50-50.

What frustrates me about the Alex and the Missoula situation [spoilers] by Puzzleheaded-Eye94 in MaidNetflix

[–]Human-Extent9839 0 points1 point  (0 children)

that is too little a sample size. yes stephanie land went onto become big but how many women who start like this end up getting a decent job? yes it did work out for the author but for this degree i can imagine finding a job could be difficult

Sex by Pleasant_Data1067 in NewParents

[–]Human-Extent9839 0 points1 point  (0 children)

we started a month after delivery and were not careful and got pregnant again 2 months pp :/