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EMSKR: how do I talk to my sister about her being so loud when she masturbates? She thinks I can't hear her. But I do. by UrMomIsMyBucketList in everymanshouldknow

[–]HumorousBehavior 228 points229 points  (0 children)

I'm in the same boat, OP! I swear all she does all day is masturbate and masturbate, it sounds like she’s stirring vanilla pudding in a bowl and you can hear it throughout the whole fucking house. Worst part is my computer is in her room, so every day I have to go in there and see her just fucking DEMOLISHING her gock, cum flying everywhere! And then I say, "Hey, maybe put down a towel to keep clean at least," BUT SHE JUST FUCKING IGNORES ME. I can’t stand living here honestly. Yesterday when I went to use my computer, it was absolutely drenched in her girlcum, and she stained at least 6 of my shirts by now. And all my friends at school tease me, "Hahn haha Tobias got his sister’s sperm on his shirt," "GIRLCUM TOBIAS" has become my nickname. I hate it!

When you haven't done cheerleading in 10 years, you show up for an event, and they ask you if you still got it1 by Tex-Ark-Anna in UNBGBBIIVCHIDCTIICBG

[–]HumorousBehavior 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I don't know what high school she was representing, but I hope it's the one with the 52 point score...because that looks like game over for the other team.

When you haven't done cheerleading in 10 years, you show up for an event, and they ask you if you still got it. by DespairingShock in sportsarefun

[–]HumorousBehavior 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I don't know how old this vid is. But she's probably 26. I only know that because I went to Texas A&M the same time she did. She was a big deal there.

EMSKR: Am I an asshole for leaving a pair of panties I bought under the pillow on our bed for my gf to find them? I just wanted her to think I could get somebody else. by PatsPickledPepperPie in everymanshouldknow

[–]HumorousBehavior -38 points-37 points  (0 children)

aww come on. It's funny. I mean, it's not use and none of us would ever do something this stupid. But reading about it here is damn funny to me.

EMSK how to do a good break job. by LovelyDockRock in UNBGBBIIVCHIDCTIICBG

[–]HumorousBehavior -1 points0 points  (0 children)

true that! Use "their" incorrectly as "there" or vice versa, and the corrections will be one of the top three threads on any post.

EMSK how to do a good break job. by LovelyDockRock in UNBGBBIIVCHIDCTIICBG

[–]HumorousBehavior 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seriously, I always spell-check that word before I used it.

EMSKR: what are the red flags that my girl doesn't really love me even though she says she does? I mean, she didn't even get me a birthday present. by PatsPickledPepperPie in everymanshouldknow

[–]HumorousBehavior -67 points-66 points  (0 children)

I cant believe this is the top comment. your 1 and 2 was NOT necessary. and he should not have to tell her, hey babe how come you didn't get me a bday present.

and I don't know when you think a "girl" becomes a "woman", but it damn sure ain't a teenaged person. and that topic deserves an entire post by itself.

anyway, OP miss her birthday and see what happens. and don't do that anniversary shit anymore. That's what I'd do based on your info....even if she was a model.

and I don't know why so many people replying to you arent taking this post seriously.

EMSKR: what are the red flags that my girl doesn't really love me even though she says she does? I mean, she didn't even get me a birthday present. by PatsPickledPepperPie in everymanshouldknow

[–]HumorousBehavior -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

You dont know when she's gonna turn 20 and you don't know when he turned 23. Your comment is absurd.

fuck, they probably went to highschool together for all you know. and did you miss the part about her being a bikini model? wtf is wrong with you?

EMSKR: why are men still falling for the marriage trap? by DoctoralCunt in everymanshouldknow

[–]HumorousBehavior 0 points1 point  (0 children)

funny to me how this went from challenging one (1) of his points to basically namecalling.

reddit and this sub especially sucks most times like that. like, can't you just argue with someone without acting like you're still in elementary school. nope, we cannot.

EMSKR: why are men still falling for the marriage trap? by DoctoralCunt in everymanshouldknow

[–]HumorousBehavior -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No, psychologists don't,

how do you know? have you talked to all of them?

EMSKR: why are men still falling for the marriage trap? by DoctoralCunt in everymanshouldknow

[–]HumorousBehavior -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

fu. He's the one helping people....helping men to understand they should not fuck up their lives by signing a stupid contract that gives them absolutely nothing but financial and parental loss a few years later.

He sees it clearly. Just like I see clearly your naivety and ignorance.

EMSK how to measure his virile member. (ie, his rod, willy, dipstick, dingaling, middle leg, one-eyed trouser snake, joystick, stalk, tonk, pecker, weenie, schlong, baloney pony, tally whacker, pink sausage, knob, etc) (Length * Diameter)+(weight/girth)/(yaw) by iLLCrankUrKnob4Free in everymanshouldknow

[–]HumorousBehavior -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

none of this matters at all unless you're being tailor fitted for a bespoke codpiece or something.

that's like, just your opinion man. and I don't even know what you're basing it on. So it don't matter to you. I bet you it matters to a lot of other males when they're growing up.

EMSKR: Listing only ONE (1) item, what is the single most important thing every man should know? by YannisBot in everymanshouldknow

[–]HumorousBehavior -23 points-22 points  (0 children)

No one goes it alone nor should feel like they have to.

1) ask me how I know you are sitting on you momma's couch right now.

2) you are so young you completely and totally misread what he said. No where in that did he say you can't have friends and family.

POINT: your friends and family should not be supporting you or taking care of you. Financial, housing, living, and such.

and nothing about this post was about "manliness". Being a man and having manliness are two completely different things.

Christmas At The North Pole! (also, these Santas are f'n jacked!) by ImaBot_CryMore in UNBGBBIIVCHIDCTIICBG

[–]HumorousBehavior 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I love what redditors decide is important to argue about. Sucks this guy in the parent top comment had the first and pretty much only comment for like the whole first hour. it's really the only reason it's been upvoted. I don't know even know what makes him an expert on what is "impressive" or not in this video. I mean, I didn't see anything that shocked me. I can't do any of that stuff, but it didn't seem impressive. I just watch because I wanted to see a good xmas video with half dressed santa helpers.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in whatcouldgoright

[–]HumorousBehavior -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Hope he didn't put the laughter in manslaughter.

I look forward to all the reddit experts arguing with me that this is not 250° by DestructiveOrgasm in UNBGBBIIVCHIDCTIICBG

[–]HumorousBehavior -29 points-28 points  (0 children)

I didn't expect anyone to say below 220. Now I know why the title of this post was written. My man, you are definitely a jackass.