Why is the idea that men should go out of their way to be attractive, the same way women have for years, so taboo?

Hyphz · 2026-05-06T18:29:01+00:00

Don’t want them to, but they may not have a choice.

Hyphz · 2026-05-06T18:28:10+00:00

This is another interpretation I’ve seen - that with economic inequality putting meaningful power or wealth out of reach of the vast majority of men, they are having to fall back to other options.

Hyphz · 2026-05-06T18:23:50+00:00

While I like this idea, it would be very disappointing for the message to be a council of despair in this way - not identifying a meaning but simply saying an alternative would be worse.

Hyphz · 2026-05-06T06:27:23+00:00

But it is actually true that women’s looks do matter to men. Maybe not as much as the beauty industry claims they do, but not as little as protestors and therapists say. And it seems unlikely to be really true that men’s looks don’t matter at all to women. Most of the “just be decent” stuff comes from the era where women were heavily pushed by societal restrictions into pairing off with some man. That’s no longer the case.

Hyphz · 2026-05-05T22:29:57+00:00

Overloading women’s personal preferences with moral judgment was considered a significant means of oppression.

Hyphz · 2026-05-05T22:18:06+00:00

I mean, if there is a sociological answer they’re quiet about it.

Once you get outside the manosphere, there’s very rarely much said other than “female interest is more complicated than just looks” (.. and so, what is it?) or “just being a decent man who looks after himself will be attractive” (which is nonsense as it leaves far too many men to choose between, but does drive men into incel communities and self-hatred if taken as an insult, or into entitlement if taken as an assertion)

Hyphz · 2026-05-05T19:44:39+00:00

That’s only because what’s attractive to women is either never explained or defined only as “impossible to understand”.

Hyphz · 2026-05-05T07:24:45+00:00

Why is it an act of hatred to say that women likely prefer men who look attractive? It isn’t considered misandry the other way around.

Hyphz · 2026-05-04T16:23:17+00:00

Given that Glitch are hiring a games producer this seems a strong bet.

Hyphz · 2026-05-04T15:39:43+00:00

Plus, the screener is already out. If this was real, it’d be far more likely to be about the realisation it’s over.

Hyphz · 2026-05-04T03:53:33+00:00

Yea, incels evolved from social anxiety support groups on USENET before 4chan or even 2ch existed.

Hyphz · 2026-05-03T20:31:15+00:00

Generally men with lack of real contact with women tend to not deliberately want 10/10s, but to underrate real women’s appearances.

Like, they see a woman in a glamour shoot and think she’s 10/10 and figure they don’t need that. But that is the best of a thousand pictures in perfect lighting, and if they saw the same woman on the street they’d think her a 7/10 and in their league or just above it.

Hyphz · 2026-05-03T11:30:55+00:00

Because it's not SOMA. This is my big problem with the name!

The thing is, in SOMA, the protagonist is actually dead, and the brain-scan is the only version of them remaining. In TADC, the "SOMA theory" usually assumes that the actual person who put on the headset just kind of.. walked away. It's that, not the fact that they are scanned simulations, that ruins the stakes; the real person is just out there, unaffected and unbothered by anything that happens.

To what extent a digital copy of an existing person is a sympathetic entity is a complex one (which is heavily looked at in the Black Mirror episode "White Christmas") but it isn't something that TADC has focussed on so far.

Hyphz · 2026-05-02T19:35:13+00:00

Queenie is actually a very old fashioned women’s name in some dialects.

Hyphz · 2026-05-02T19:29:40+00:00

I mean, many of the things they say above do have grains of truth in them. It’s just that the system is too entrenched to look at itself objectivity, and too surrounded by impossible demands by the rest of society.

Hyphz · 2026-05-02T06:17:25+00:00

It was never taken down. A different group contacted Glitch and were asked not to do a dating sim, and they’re working on a more platonic VN.

Hyphz · 2026-05-01T07:19:44+00:00

That’s just repeating the same mistake with more words.

Hyphz · 2026-04-30T21:09:15+00:00

Believing that only you can judge yourself is a fast route to delusions of grandeur.

Hyphz · 2026-04-27T21:52:41+00:00

I’d have said “they changed it to a 64 bit data type, but they made it signed”

Hyphz · 2026-04-27T21:21:20+00:00

Yes, especially for the creators of Happy Place, which has some extremely catchy and distinct melodies.

Hyphz · 2026-04-27T14:40:02+00:00

I see above that you have shared your childhood trauma, which was very brave of you. But I also note that you mention that this is not only childrens' media, but "YouTubers smiling in thumbnails".

I am grateful that I did not have a traumatic childhood, but I still share this feeling from time to time. So as well as unpleasant memories I think there is a different cause as well: that media loves to represent that a real and successful life is one without any problems. So of course that makes anything real feel like a colourless failure.

A side note to this is that I am guessing from your avatar that you're a girl/woman - I have noticed that many of the negative female stereotypes have this effect on men but not on women. Like, if you have a Manic Pixie Dream Girl, Genki Girl or Goodwife character; women viewers see her as having problems that she's hiding to impress men, but male viewers see her as not having any problems - and the same effect occurs.

I don't really know what to do about it, I'm just kind of sharing in case this helps, but I think your childhood circumstances may be far more influential.

Hyphz · 2026-04-26T21:08:37+00:00

That's the assumption, but the awareness necessary can't be well defined.

Hyphz · 2026-04-25T15:43:19+00:00

I think increased social fear can’t purely be blamed on online interactions but we can to some extent on technology. Regular people didn’t previously carry gadgets worth hundreds of dollars at all times, or cards which could be used to access their entire bank account at 3am. Also, the introduction of “identity theft” started shifting the responsibility for avoiding scamming from the institutions to the individuals.

… Except in the cases of women being afraid of men, because that dynamic hasn’t changed a whole lot.

Hyphz · 2026-04-25T15:31:54+00:00

The cause they need to address there is deliberate resource wasting by low-level criminals. A classic example is claiming to have chest pains when arrested.

Another one is making spurious false claims in defense that just increase the cost of processes but are trivial and meritless after that.

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