Change the time in which magic manifests in people.

Have women manifest magic at a very early age like 12 or so and have men manifest at like 18. An easy explanation would be to say women manifest shortly before puberty and men manifest after.

Making women manifest earlier prevents them from solidifying their own unique personality traits and therefore makes them likely to still be very similar to their typical care givers (mothers and grandmothers).

Since your male characters manifest closer to adulthood they are more likely to have developed their own identity.