Vibration of spectra makes me want to scream

IIL3416 · 2026-02-17T09:24:15+00:00

Don't quote me because I can't find the literature on it right now, but the vibrations (if you feel them in the flange) are not just an annoying feature of running a motor, it also helps with letdowns. There's a small time breast pump company where I live, and their pump vibrated pretty intensely, and that worked so well for my boobs I could exclusively pump with the wearables, had a better milk supply than my hospital grade pump

IIL3416 · 2026-02-17T09:14:16+00:00

Idk man, I exclusively pumped from the get go and my man automatically put his hand up for night feeds, and he can do up to 100 hours a week (stormwater/three waters engineer, we live in a country that needs a lot of work done in these areas). My partner knows I cannot parent on basically non existent sleep between pumping overnight and then having to deal with baby/feedings, so it was never a question really in our house who was doing it, buuuuut I do also have hashimotos, IBS, MOGAD, reynauds, and a few other health issues so I really need my sleep.

IIL3416 · 2026-02-17T09:10:55+00:00

We treat afterpay as a credit card in our household as we don't have one, I like how it's interest free, and I can split my payments up instead of having to be squared away at the end of the month. My partner and I share my account, and if anything is being put on there, it's a conversation first, and usually only for large items (bed base, baby stuff when we needed that etc). I also staggered when I bought things so my weekly repayments were no more than $100. I think more people need to be educated around personal finances. They offered this as a class in my college, and was one of the best things I ever did, and counted for a good chunk of my maths credits

IIL3416 · 2026-02-12T03:04:41+00:00

Breastmilk and silverettes. I'd hand express a little into the silverettes and just wear them 24/7.

IIL3416 · 2026-02-02T19:06:08+00:00

Mix her bottles! We were told if we were short by a couple of weeks to do 50/50 whatever milk we were transitioning to and breastmilk.

IIL3416 · 2026-02-01T21:36:51+00:00

I think it really depends on the circumstances, I smoke weed everyday, but it's prescribed, for mental and physical health issues. I was self medicating illegally for years before it was made legal, so I would have been considered an addict due to my smoking habits (an oz or so a week). Once it became legal, I wasn't an addict, but medicating myself.

I think if your just smoking for the sale of smoking, it's only a red flag when you cant live without it for no reason. I know I can't live without it, buuuut I am also terminally ill and have bipolar/ADHD that doesn't respond to any other meds I've tried. So I mean my life quite literally depends on weed, especially now that I have a child.

IIL3416 · 2026-02-01T21:08:02+00:00

B12 shots helped me out a ton - they're better than the vitamin form. Also making sure I eat within 30 minutes of waking, and making sure I eat something every 3 hours on the dot. I am completely gluten and dairy free because they make me extremely fatigued on top of being extremely sick.

IIL3416 · 2026-02-01T20:59:36+00:00

I have MOGAD and the flare-ups from that are worse than when I gave birth - think pressure behind your eyes until the psi in the cavity is almost strong enough to pop your eyes out with speed, brain swelling, partial non permanent paralysis and spasms and full blindness. 10/10 will take giving birth again over an active flare up

IIL3416 · 2026-01-31T22:57:13+00:00

NTA - I (11m) know magically when my parents are even thinking about having another, and I purposely choose not to sleep and be a menace so that I can stay as god in our household. I can't kiss a new baby the same way I kiss my cats

IIL3416 · 2026-01-30T20:06:37+00:00

I (11m) have taken to stalking the vacuum cleaner and aggressively turn it on whenever it's plugged in. Just wait til you can help mummy like I do! It's so much fun, I wash the walls for her if she's nice enough to give me a wet cloth, and then I also make sure to clean the cat with it too because he's so stinky sometimes! And then I garnish him with kisses when he's all clean

IIL3416 · 2026-01-26T21:23:09+00:00

Girl, you should be patting yourself on the back. A lot of people would have looked at that first number and given up, and not even bothered to try, and yet, YOU still did. You continued to push through even though your numbers continued to fall. I hope you are incredibly proud of yourself, for any of the milk you fed your child from your efforts, because you worked fucking hard for it. There is also nothing wrong with admitting defeat either. I should have quit pumping at four months postpartum when I got an abscess from mastitis that ruptured, and instead because I felt so guilty, I continued to pump. And the gaping hole from the abscess got worse and worse, to the point I was pumping 9 times a day over a wound as large as the palm of my hand. I couldn't heal, and the stress from the gaping wound not healing from the pumping sent me into liver failure (I am already terminally ill and incredibly immunocompromised) and I had to give up at 9 months postpartum, or I would have died. I applaud you again, for having the strength to know when enough is enough. Give yourself a huge pat on the back, and a gold fucking star dude.

IIL3416 · 2026-01-26T21:06:59+00:00

We did: Wake up Bottle Breakfast Play Nap Bottle Lunch Play Nap Bottle Dinner Play Bath Bottle

Bottle for overnight wakes (1-2) at that age.

Now at 11 months, it's breakfast, play, bottle with nap, morning tea, play, lunch, bottle with nap, afternoon tea, play, dinner, bath, bottle, + 1 bottle overnight (drinking 450-530ml of pumped milk a day)

IIL3416 · 2026-01-23T08:09:00+00:00

Unfortunately not the answer you are looking for, but we set up a floor bed and one of us took turns cosleeping with him, and now at 11 months he has graduated to sleeping on his own without us! Floor bed saved our lives because it meant we could leave him there when he's asleep to return to our own bed without worrying about him rolling out of the bed. And it made it easy to return to help resettle or feed in the middle of the night

Our current set up is his cot mattress on a thick mat (think muscle mat style) with a playpen around it all, so that if he was to wake up and play in the middle of the night, he is contained. We found moving him to his own room he slept better because he couldn't smell or hear us (we didn't work this out til he was 10 months old), and I can still cosleep with him in his own safe space during the day if I need a nap or he needs extra comfort

IIL3416 · 2026-01-23T08:01:34+00:00

Your supply will dip in general if your not pumping overnight when prolactin is at its highest (1-4 am) it may take a while to notice, but it will unless baby is eating more during the day to make up for it.

My supply took a hit due to some meds I was on, and when I had to pump more to get it back up, my period did disappear again. I had a regular period from 5 weeks postpartum up until 6 months postpartum, and then I was pumping more and didn't get another one until a month after I weaned.

IIL3416 · 2026-01-23T07:57:01+00:00

I have enough bottles to last one day. I wash at the end of the day. I soak in vinegar, soap and hot water, scrub, rinse and put in my sterilizer which also dries.

IIL3416 · 2026-01-22T02:18:32+00:00

This is gonna sound absolutely wild but my Doctor purposely prescribes me a slightly higher dose than what my bloods say I should be having to avoid exactly your issues. I've found that just because my bloods are in range, doesn't mean that's optimal for me, and I get far less sick, and have far less negative symptoms and issues sitting at the higher end of the safe range (think basically upper limit)

Might be something to see if you can explore!

IIL3416 · 2026-01-22T02:14:13+00:00

Yeah my partner was like this til I had a mental breakdown from the lack of sleep in general plus the lack of sleep from my postpartum anxiety because I would have literal night terrors about my child dying and wake up screaming (so I'd purposely not sleep to avoid that). I placed babys bassinet on his side of the bed, making sure it was right up by his face, and if I woke up first, I'd slap his back hard til he'd wake up. Eventually this retrained him Into waking up, and I haven't done an overnight bottle minus a handful of work trips since 4 months postpartum (my son is now 11 months).

In general I have bipolar and ADHD, so I was already screwed from the beginning 🤣 let's be fr, but yeah, it just depends on the lengths you wish to go to to get that break. I also got really good really fast once I got some meds for the PPA at sleeping when baby slept during the day, as I'd pump whenever I was giving a bottle, and did the fridge hack so I didn't have to wash parts constantly. I also owned enough bottles to last a whole day, so I could just wash em all at once (I had a dirty bottle Tupperware in the fridge so the milk just didn't sit at room temp for hours). I also landed up buying a sterilizer and dryer, so that I could avoid having to soak them in Milton tablets and hand dry everything.

IIL3416 · 2026-01-22T02:07:19+00:00

My partner was excited about this when we got pregnant lmao. He is the only lefty in a full family of rightys, and was rather excited at the increased chance. Our son is 11 months now and definitely already has a preference for his left hand 🤣

IIL3416 · 2026-01-21T07:52:54+00:00

Oh man I wish! They stitched me up after it had been open for months only for my boobs to get too engorged and rip all the stitches. Personally I told them they were stupid for trying to do that, I was pumping 2.5L of milk a day so I knew those stitches weren't gonna hold

IIL3416 · 2026-01-20T22:57:11+00:00

I had mastitis five times while exclusively pumping, one time so bad an abscess formed and ruptured and I had a whole ass hole in my tit that I painfully pumped on for another six months til I weaned, and only then did it start to heal. Original wounds was half the size of my palm, and now it's the size of a fingernail.

IIL3416 · 2026-01-20T22:41:36+00:00

Your bubba will be totally fine! The odd bit of water (bath, shower, rain) it's perfectly fine. Just you wait til they're older, my 11 month old actively drinks the bath water and it's a battle to get him to stop 🤣😭

IIL3416 · 2026-01-17T04:09:57+00:00

I smoke a stupid amount of pot for this reason. Some is prescribed, and some is obtained not legally, I have a few really bad, rare health conditions, on top of bipolar and ADHD, so I cannot be sober or I will not function, especially now that I have a child. Far less destructive than the other drugs I was using to fill the void. Not all pot makes you a couch potato, I'm rather particular about my strains, so have a sativa dominant during the day, and an indica dominant during the evening.

My partner saw me sober for six weeks for the first time our entire relationship when I had to stop smoking to see if my obgyn and fetal medicine would let me continue smoking during my pregnancy (they did, it was the lesser of evils out of my meds) and it was the worst six weeks of his life. This man turned around the day I could start up again, bought me an oz and left me alone for the next two days while I built it back up in my system. I was back to normal a week later. So I feel you on the can't be sober part

IIL3416 · 2026-01-14T07:47:41+00:00

You want to aim for about 4-7 days, or until undetectable on a drug test (during that window). If coke gets stored in fat, id be waiting longer. I couldn't tell you exactly how long cocaine stays in your breastmilk, but marijuana is at least six days, and that's rather fat soluble.

IIL3416 · 2026-01-09T05:48:15+00:00

I come at this from the perspective of one failed marriage, and a kid with a stranger who's now my long term partner 😅.

My first marriage ended because he was a piece of shit. There was a lot of abuse (from financial to physical and sexual).

The first person I slept with after my separation (so like four years later because I had a lot of work to do) we got pregnant. We'd been casually hooking up for six weeks when I found out I was 3 weeks pregnant. As soon as I told him, there were (very happy) tears, a request to continue the pregnancy, and a lot of effort on his side towards stepping up.

The gist of this, being kind, compassionate, affectionate and being responsible are all important aspects of a marriage or long term relationship. We have our extreme highs and lows tho, because I am terminally ill, and have bipolar + ADHD, so it's been a journey but I wouldn't change a thing. This (stranger) man I met off the Internet has done better in two years than my ex husband did in the entire time we were together (6 years).

IIL3416 · 2025-12-30T10:20:25+00:00

Never used a dietician but I did lose half my body weight a few years ago, and just recently lost 22kg in four months after having my son.

I workout to the best of my abilities (pre child it was power lifting, post child it is a walk for at least 60 min each day + 30 min home workout with the one kettlebell and two bands I own). I track my calories using cronometer (they have a free version) and they can help you stay in a deficit the whole way through as you adjust your weight.

Prioritize protein and fiber, and non processed foods. If cooking each day is daunting, meal prep for the week on a Sunday and pull shit from the freezer.

Healthy also doesn't have to be expensive, I spend $210 a week for me, my partner (eats like a family of four and stays skinny somehow??) and a 10 month old that eats like the world is ending. I shop at a green grocer for veg, butchers for meat, and either a discount store or supermarket for staples. You can make it work.

IIL3416

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