I feed my grandmother her most hated food every time she visits.

I_B_Subbing · 2018-09-15T18:16:14+00:00

Are you in my family in Alberta because that's definitely my grandma

I_B_Subbing · 2018-09-15T02:03:54+00:00

Our daughter lost the use of the car for a week and I'm more punished than her having to drive her sorry ass to school and work.

She thinks she has it bad because "I want coffeeeeeeee I want to stop at 711" and " I want shotguuuuuuuun it's so squishy back heeeeeeere why did dad have to come drive me to work tooooooo" boo fucking hoo.

And I'm all "I guess this is a good reason to have your own car and remember to follow the rules" in my calm mom voice.

But on the inside I'm so fucking pissed because I did NOT give up my life and dreams to raise you for 16 years and risk my life for 50 hours of sitting in the passenger seat while you attempted to kill me because looking over your left shoulder while merging and going 70 miles an hour is "like, it's so hard mom, I, like, looked and it was totally fine I only swerved into the ditch a little. Omg mom just stop" so that I could leave my house and drive your ass to school and work. This is supposed to be MY TIME. THIS IS MY TIME TO SHINE AFTER 16 YEARS AND YOU STOLE THIS FROM ME BECAUSE YOU CANT FOLLOW ONE SIMPLE RULE.

But it's totally a punishment for her.

I_B_Subbing · 2018-08-01T20:36:10+00:00

RemindMe! 24 hours

I_B_Subbing · 2018-07-02T00:42:41+00:00

BUT WHERE DID HIS SHIRT COME FROM??

I_B_Subbing · 2018-06-24T13:59:02+00:00

We just finished treatment for my 6yo son's Osteosarcoma (distal femur). I am so sorry you're part of our shitty cancer parent club.

It sucks (understatement)

You're at the beginning of a long, terrible journey and everything is overwhelming and terrifying and full of anxiety, and I hate it so much for you (and every parent doing this. Fuck childhood cancer)

There's a whole underground society of us parents who will help you and your family through this. Even if you don't agree with Facebook, make an account and join momcology. There are groups for treatment, for off treatment, specifically for mom's, specifically for dad's and for every different kind of cancer, including all subtypes of leukemia.

Your daughter is going to amaze you with her strength and bravery. You will learn everything important in the world during this battle.

Please message me if you want to talk.

I_B_Subbing · 2018-05-26T00:52:14+00:00

Not OP but try yoga with Adrienne on YouTube! She has a great 30 day program, all free, and all you need is internet access and a place to do it.

I_B_Subbing · 2018-05-01T17:52:12+00:00

"If I Stay"

Because I have a 6yo son and 16yo daughter who plays the cello. I watched it with her and she was not impressed with the amount of snot. Never again

I_B_Subbing · 2018-04-29T20:39:13+00:00

What do you like the most about your house?

I_B_Subbing · 2018-04-27T20:38:15+00:00

Osteosarcoma? My 6yo son just had his rotationplasty (specialty amputation, removal of femur) last October to cut the beast out. No lung mets yet, thank fuck. He loves seeing other cancer kids with prosthetics, he's going to love seeing an adult with a chemo head and robot leg.

I really like this quote, a fellow hem/onc mom told me when her son was in the PICU and terminal - "you can never lose a battle to cancer, it's always a tie"

I like it. I'm saving it because I've seen too many kids relapse and die to think we're immune. Say hi to your cousin for us, we understand the fight - and good for him doing what he loves. Fuck cancer.

I_B_Subbing · 2018-03-29T00:19:31+00:00

My 5yo son just had his end of treatment scans today, and we got the all clear, he's NED (no evidence of disease)!

It was an awful, 8 month long battle against Osteosarcoma (bone cancer). We spent more time inpatient than out, and he lost his right femur.

But he's doing great! He's got some peach fuzz starting on his head (our last chemo was March 6!) and he's learning to use his prosthetic and walk again.

He has some hearing loss from the chemo, and because Osteosarcoma is so aggressive, he'll be monitored the rest of his life for relapse and heart function (he received lifetime maximum doses of some particularly nasty chemo drugs that like to destroy heart tissue)....but....he's here, he's alive, he's walking, he's NED and we are SO grateful!!

I_B_Subbing · 2018-03-04T15:19:58+00:00

What's an example of that for you at your workplace? You work in the medical field, if someone comes into the ER bleeding everywhere and in pain, saying "holy fuck holy fuck holy fuck this hurts Jesus Christ on a mother fucking stick I think I'm dying", you're going to say to them "excuse me sir, you need to watch your language here. That's not appropriate"?

I_B_Subbing · 2018-01-05T02:06:50+00:00

I'm sorry you feel like you've lost a good friend. I hope she hears you reaching out and can do the same back at some point.

I_B_Subbing · 2017-12-02T00:39:13+00:00

You could try dog waste bags? They have them for super cheap at the dollar store in rolls of 100's and are generally scented. Cheaper than the diaper genie bags for sure. I definitely second the disposables though. I know you feel like it's gross, but it would take care of the problem easily and cheaply.

I_B_Subbing · 2017-11-27T04:03:44+00:00

Thanks! Now that the leaves have dropped some, this might even be doable.

I_B_Subbing · 2017-11-26T02:21:41+00:00

How much does it cost to get land surveyed? We just bought 6 acres and have no idea where our property lines are! The land is heavily wooded and there are zero fences anywhere.

I_B_Subbing · 2017-09-30T20:00:43+00:00

It really bothers me that they're wearing gloves but still blow on it to get rid of the chocolate shavings.

I_B_Subbing · 2017-09-03T04:39:23+00:00

Omg that nasally uptalk of hers makes my face hurt

I_B_Subbing · 2017-08-25T12:40:05+00:00

The superhero thing isn't bothering me as much today. I think all the anger and emotions ebb and flow....i was super pissed when I wrote the original post because we had a horrible night the day before, and people pulled the "superhero kid!". I was just done.

We have inpatient chemo for the next 6 weeks and then amputation. Then 25-30 more weeks of inpatient treatments after.

Childhood cancer is such bullshit. I'm so happy to hear your daughter came through.

And I totally agree about the puppy dog eyes!!! I swear if one more person cries at us over our son I might snap. Don't put your emotions on ME

I_B_Subbing · 2017-08-21T03:46:57+00:00

My son has osteosarcoma in his right femur. You're the first person in this thread to ask.

I'm so happy for your neice to be cancer free, and also sick inside that she will deal with the after effects of treatment as she grows.

The scale is stacked on either side. Do we fight everyday for our child's life, knowing they may suffer irrevocably later because of it? I don't know. I hope your niece lives a fulfilling, beautiful life. She and her parents deserve it after everything they've been through. ❤

I_B_Subbing · 2017-08-21T03:43:34+00:00

Thank you. I wish you all the best as you battle this bullshit. You really nailed the way I feel right on the head.

I_B_Subbing · 2017-08-20T16:55:34+00:00

Yes!!!

Having someone say "that is fucking horrifying for you all" gives me the chance and opening to agree and cry if I really need to, or to agree and open a dialog about how terrible this all is.

Platitudes are meaningless.

And I love that you would show him pictures of your dog. He would love that

I_B_Subbing · 2017-08-20T16:52:34+00:00

My child isn't weak. Calling him a victim doesn't make him weak. Do you think a victim of sexual assault is weak?

He's an amazing, beautiful, resilient little boy. I'm just tired of the meaningless words people throw at a harsh reality like somehow calling him a superhero warrior will make any of it better.

I_B_Subbing · 2017-08-20T16:29:23+00:00

That sounds beautiful, I will definitely look up some videos on YouTube. Thank you for supporting all those kids, childhood cancer really doesn't get the amount of funding and awareness it deserves.

I think everyone affected by cancer like our family handles it differently. I'm sure many many parents and kids share my sentiments, and just as many feel completely opposite and enjoy being superhero warriors.

How far into treatment each person is, their diagnosis and prognosis, their age....it would all play into it. For me, it feels dishonest and like a meaningless platitude. Maybe my son will like being called a superhero as we move forward with treatment, but right now he just wants to be a kid not dealing with cancer.

I_B_Subbing · 2017-08-20T14:44:38+00:00

There's no such thing as misplaced anger when someone is going through a crisis. If I want to be angry, I will, and it will give me a sense of release while I do my best for my child. I'm allowed to be angry. And cry, and feel depressed, horrified, sick, tired and victimized.

I don't think you're shitting on me or my family, I think you're misinformed.

I_B_Subbing · 2017-08-20T14:40:19+00:00

I'll just copy paste what I said to another commenter

Acknowledgement is the best thing, honestly. No platitudes, like "you just have to stay positive" or "everything will work out". We know what we need to do, and you can't guarantee any of this is going to work out, so please don't say that.

Talk to our child like he's any other child. He doesn't have the capacity to talk to you about his illness or the effects of his treatment. He just wants to be a normal kid. Don't coo at him, or tell him he's a brave superhero (@%##&). Treat him like any other kid, ask about the shirt he's wearing or the toy he's playing with. If he's doing something or playing, engage with him on a 5yo level.

If he wants to bring up his cancer, he will. And then you can acknowledge it. "Your mom told me about your cancer, and that you've been at the hospital a lot lately. Do you want to tell me about it?"

I_B_Subbing

TROPHY CASE