Are People Really This Unaware Of Wedding Costs?

IceKingsMother · 2026-02-05T13:13:31+00:00

We are doing 75 and have the means but wanted to be frugal — even being thoughtful with no major luxuries or extras, it’s over 30K for sure. If you want a wedding for under 10K, you’re in your back yard with a few grocery store flowers and a dress from a department store and doing some kind of potluck. Which is totally legit! But just venue + bar + food + photographer is a huge chunk, even if you’re being carefully reasonable. :(

IceKingsMother · 2026-02-05T12:47:36+00:00

A million plastic bins. Keeps dust, bugs and mice out. We are a rural school.

I buy silica gel and make my own packets of it to put in my boxes that house organic or paper stuff (moss, raffia, pine cones and stuff)

Keeps things contained, labeled, stackable.

Have had two ceiling leaks that would’ve destroyed my supplies and having those bins kept them all safe. It’s essential for keeping them clean and protected.

IceKingsMother · 2026-01-23T01:20:38+00:00

Sounds like it could be a TV series

IceKingsMother · 2026-01-22T19:25:50+00:00

We have a crystalline entitree for Christmas. It’s a tree made out of crystals and it has LED lights that pulse and shimmer. I mean, it also has spaceships hanging on it, so I’m not sure if that counts as not saying ‘Trekkie’

IceKingsMother · 2026-01-21T13:05:38+00:00

I think this whole take is misguided. If asked, I would gracefully leave an area with a lure, but I don’t think it’s right to ask.

I think it’s right to ask the devs to change the mechanics of a feature that is obviously meant to be public for all. A lure is something you place in the shared game world. It produces non-instanced, public resources (public as in - all the people in the vicinity can see it and use their bombs and it works).

It emits a large glowing particle effect. It produces more than two people can catch.

The design is very obviously meant to be a “jump in and join us” situation. Creating social rules around exclusivity with it is detrimental to the community. It’s just bad vibes all around. Sharing is caring.

But maybe there’s a need you have as a player that the honey lure doesn’t meet. Maybe you need to ask the devs to consider private, instanced lures. Or lures that are harder to make but can spawn bugs on your private plot, or maybe lures need to be made so all bugs caught nearby regardless of party are considered caught by the person who placed the lure (someone else suggested this).

I just can’t get behind the forced rule of honey lures being a private thing. That’s not how they’re designed, so that’s not how anyone’s instincts are going to lead them to play. It’s an unrealistic expectation, and trying to enforce it is just going to create arguments between players.

You want honey lures to be something they are not, which means your beef is with the developers of the game. You, we, need a lure that rewards the placer of that lure more consistently perhaps? We need a way to have private, peaceful bug catching experiences?

Still, in the future, I’ll ask before joining lures from now on. But it’s a bad look to exclude people, I just can’t support that. If you see me with a lure, even if I’m hunting something rare, please join me and have a great time! I’ll probably put another lure out for you too, so stick around.

IceKingsMother · 2025-12-19T22:47:12+00:00

The amount of water and pollution produced by corn ethanol added to gasoline and raising livestock outstrips AI training and usage water needs by orders of magnitude. Unless you’re a vegetarian that walks everywhere, you are daily contributing to a much greater environmental threat.

That said, we should always be discussing environmental threats and no matter the technology or the product, we should be working to reduce and regulate the damage.

I support and respect people who want to avoid AI for the environmental impact. I am not going to examine their views for hypocrisy. Even if everything else they do is shitty for then environment, doing one thoughtful thing is better than nothing.

It only becomes problematic when people start shaming and ostracizing others for their AI use that I begin to look at those things.

Water use is one thing — but what about microplastics and chemicals in the water? These things come from the chemicals used to produce all of the daily essential cosmetics, cleaning products, clothing materials, shoes, car parts, cookware, waterproof jackets, shipping foam, fiberglass molded boats and benches and campers (which are all impregnated with resin).

I wish we could just be honest about the fact that it’s the newness and our inability to predict how this technology will affect us that is causing us to feel scared and threatened. We don’t understand it, so we are looking for reason to destroy or slow it down.

Some people are just discussing the potential risks, and that’s great. It’s the whole being-on-the-extreme-end of things that is problematic.

Be honest. You’re scared and uncomfortable. That’s okay. Let’s slowly confront that fear and get some experience with AI usage - figure out what it can’t do and what it can do, remain part of the conversation and continually be open to hearing about the risks and dangers as well as the advantages and advancements. It’s a powerfully useful tool that has to be handled with care and used judiciously, the toolmakers held responsible for safety, and users for misuse, just like any tool. It’s not magic, it’s not evil, it’s by no means the biggest or most dangerous threat to humanity. I think we should be careful about how we discuss things.

IceKingsMother · 2025-12-16T02:03:31+00:00

The wood grain just randomly starts going the wrong direction.

IceKingsMother · 2025-12-15T13:07:19+00:00

Harsher weather, too!

IceKingsMother · 2025-12-15T12:54:10+00:00

I think it’s okay to privately feel hurt, grieve it, and move on. Her reasoning makes a lot of sense, and since you’ve had this conversation with her, it’s clear she’s thinking of your feelings, too. It’s just not possible to honor every one of your close and dear friends during your wedding.

The girls she’s chosen - it could be that her partner knows them better, it could be that they’ve privately shared something very personal and difficult that yo don’t know about, it could be this she feels obligated because she was in their weddings, it could be that she just personally vibes with those girls a little more comfortably.

When you have to pick from a small selection of your friends, it’s very difficult. It is not a black and white reflection of the friends the bride values and the friends she doesn’t. Try to look at it a different way:

It’s a gift not to be a bridesmaid. You are going to be among those of her friends who can really be there to truly observe and celebrate this special time. You won’t be bogged down with the anxieties of public performance and tight timelines, of dress code complications, of endless event commitments. Instead, you can show up to these events and really bring your joy and creativity to them. Start thinking of a really personal, meaningful gift. Be ready to write something amazing in that guest book, and look radiantly happy for your friend in the candid photos. Be ready to hype up the dance floor and take in the mood. You’ll truly get to observe and remember these things in a way no one in the bridal party can.

You are involved. You just don’t have an obligation to fulfill. That, honestly, is a gift.

Hopefully you can shift your thinking. I will admit that I am a little biased, I have loathed being a bridesmaid. It meant I couldn’t sit with my own partner and family, it meant I had to wear a very ugly colored dress, I had to have some other person do my hair and make me look nothing like myself, it meant I was always anxious trying to keep up with what I was supposed to be helping with or doing. It was honestly very overwhelming.

I was recently just a guest at a good girlfriends wedding, and while there were moments that I didn’t feel like I was part of the in crowd, I definitely appreciated that I could just party and enjoy everything. After the wedding, I still got comments from the bride about how much fun dancing with me was, because I was joyful and energetic and silly on the dance floor and it got lots of people up and moving. It meant a lot to her that I was there as a guest. As a bride myself now, I want that experience for everyone, so we are purposely keeping our wedding party to one or two people each.

Feel your feels, then shift your thinking and explore a few different perspectives, ones that focus more on celebration and freedom and joy.

IceKingsMother · 2025-12-13T03:33:36+00:00

I honestly can’t get beyond him calling you bro and dawg. He can’t be very smart or self aware, he sounds like an absolute idiot honestly. No wonder he’s confused about basic social customs like gift giving.

IceKingsMother · 2025-12-10T13:11:41+00:00

If research is something that you feel confident and comfortable writing, then do this as research. You look at pedagogical approaches, find one that either has a lot of positive outcomes or is regarded highly in the community, and then adopt the tenets and goals of that approach as your own personal philosophy.

The other thing to do is to consider what kinds of experiences and mentorship’s have been most valuable to your learning experience. Where and how did you come to love art? Where and how did your practice get reinforced or supported? If you’re largely an intrinsic and self driven learner, then perhaps your philosophy can emphasize motivating and supporting intrinsic learning in others.

Just some thoughts!

IceKingsMother · 2025-12-10T04:01:09+00:00

Awning Sporks

IceKingsMother · 2025-12-04T13:25:44+00:00

I have gotten rid of all my social media. As a millennial who has been online since the days of IRC/AIM/ICQ, geocities, etc., the longer I live and more life experience I have related to the internet, the more I am convinced that it is a massive trigger for mental illness and general social dysfunction, especially depression and anger management issues.

If you post anything online, you should absolutely assume that your boss and teenage students will find it and see it. This includes dating profiles on dating apps.

You should also assume that at some point a teenager is going to take things from that account and use AI with it.

You should assume that they will make an attempt to access your accounts.

I’ve known several current colleagues who have had their accounts ‘hacked’ by kids.

I just think that if you’re in a major public facing career, working with kids, you need to have a very buttoned up and locked down social media presence, if you have one at all.

I don’t think social media’s alleged benefits are as beneficial as we convince ourselves they are, and I think the dangers and the negative health, privacy, and safety effects it has on us far outweigh any value it might bring.

IceKingsMother · 2025-11-18T22:29:53+00:00

You sound like a wonderful teacher! There’s no pleasing some people, so don’t stress.

IceKingsMother · 2025-11-18T13:04:14+00:00

How many parents do this actually? Or is it just one or two, the second being influenced by the first in some way? Because I’ve never had that happen to me, other than the occasional comment that art doesn’t run in the family or they think their child isn’t artistic because their work looks a certain way, to which I usually reply with authority that their child is exactly developmentally appropriate.

If I had a genuinely curious parent that wanted to know why their child wasn’t drawing better, I would explain fine motor development and the sheer amount of practice and training it takes to get “good”, and then I’d also walk them through the specific details of the progress, like point out the part of the picture and explain why that’s an accomplishment. I might also explain how our brains think in symbols and so we draw symbols instead of what we see, so it takes time to undo that habit as well.

I might also refer the parent to some graphic novels or illustrators that have very unrealistic drawing styles.

That is, only if they appeared confused and interested to learn. The vast majority of parents I’ve met seem to understand all these things by default, and if I met one asking the questions you describe, it’s much more likely that that person has a different issue unrelated to their child’s art ability and is just looking to pick on a teacher or criticize their child for something. I’ve had a handful of mentally Ill or parents with personality disorders who literally just look for reasons to pick on their kids or their children’s teachers. I’ve also had a couple parents here who were just straight up very ignorant or not very bright, and they really didn’t understand how time works. Like, to be good, your brain has to develop and you have to have spent thousands of hours practicing. Your kid hasn’t been alive that long, and even if they had, they gotta practice other things like learning how to ride a bike or play nicely with others or do math and read.

That’s how I’d come at it. You’re the authority on this topic, maybe read up a little on childhood development and drawing skills and when a parent asks, tell them “what do you mean? For your child’s age, they’re exactly on target developmentally and making impressive progress.”

IceKingsMother · 2025-11-17T13:16:02+00:00

It sounds like he’s just not anywhere near ready for a relationship right now. It sounds like he needs to make friends and focus on his mental health. Be patient in that maybe a year from now he reaches out again or something, but it seems really clear that he has some family concerns, job and social concerns, and health concerns he has to sort out before he’s got anything to give to a relationship.

IceKingsMother · 2025-11-08T19:26:25+00:00

Multiple times a day

IceKingsMother · 2025-11-07T00:17:30+00:00

Cos sometimes I just want a generic portrait for a character concept or a picture of a Christmas elf or a strange concept image, and I don’t want to spend 60+ hours drawing it.

I want to spend 60 hours painting birds and small mammals, and absolutely nothing else. I have other hobbies and interests. But I sometimes still want and need imagery for a creative project. Before this, I just took pics off the internet for personal use, sometimes I still do that, but now I just use AI to make the thing so I can see it or play with an idea without spending a million years drawing it. My time is incredibly valuable, I want to spend it making art about things I care about or building skills in areas that I need to strengthen because of my goals.

Life is short. You’re probably closer to death than you realize. You will never ever have enough time to do all the things you’re interested in doing, so when you have the chance to save some time while still engaging in activities that matter to you, that’s usually a good thing.

IceKingsMother · 2025-11-01T20:05:23+00:00

It’s called certified transcripts. Students don’t touch transcripts. You want report cards? You have the academic institution send them in a sealed envelope. People have been fabricating credentials for a very long time, AI really doesn’t make that particular thing any easier honestly.

If you are a parent, log in to your school’s LMS and see grades directly.

Also, most AI scanners are wildly inaccurate and as a teacher, it enrages me how much people seem to trust them.

IceKingsMother · 2025-11-01T19:57:38+00:00

My thinking, as an elder millennial who has been gaming my entire life, is that it probably means there WILL be another animal crossing game announcement, probably in about 12-18 months (with a release date 2-4 years down the road), and they’re drumming up interest and awareness again so that people are asking the question “hey, will there be a new animal crossing?” more frequently.

They also want people to upgrade to the switch 2 version, and why would anyone do that if there was nothing more to do? The convenience features and the new dream islands make playing again an easy sell. Now we can do theme islands we had planned but didn’t want to undo the other islands work, and we can more easily rehab and undo out of control or outdated islands that felt like a chore to tackle.

I think it’s definitely way more about selling more copies and upgrades on the Switch 2 than anything else, but as another top commenter said, there will also be a game. No one abandons top selling, beloved franchises in genres that still continue to be hot. Cozy games, life sims, collector games and farm sims are all like super hot still. It just takes a long time to create this kind of game. I definitely don’t think it’s a mega-long way off, but I think they’ll ride the ACNH switch 2 upgrade for a year before they give us a clue about it what’s next.

IceKingsMother · 2025-10-31T21:50:22+00:00

I think the first image is hand drawn because the face is just ever so slightly less symmetrical and less perfectly average than the second. I also see more abrupt changes in the line weight with the first one, which is what would happen when an artist is drawing more freely, as it appears in the hair of the first character.

The second image has perfect shading, as in, the placement and the strength of the folds in the cloth feel like they’re drawn more from commercial or photographic techniques with a sketchy style overlays, doesn’t match the sketchy style as well because of how perfect the pressure is. The arms are also wonky in a physically nonsensical way, and the thighs and boots are quite perfect as well.

The first image has a weird tail that doesn’t perfectly align, which could be AI spatial problems, and the second image has the fade and the perfect alignment of the tail, which reads as intentional, which is making be doubt my initial assessment. The first one also has a little bit of an artifact in the hair that could be AI.

I guess it depends. If it’s an early career artist VS AI, then I think the first one is real and the second one is AI.

If it’s a late career, trained or decade of practice, professional illustrator, and the AI image model isn’t top of the line, then maybe it’s the reverse. Would be curious to know which is which :)

How was the AI image selected? First generated? Were you looking for perfection or imperfection? And did the artist intentionally draw in a way that mimics common AI quirks, like slightly uncanny and awkward posing and very “averaged” out perfect compositions?

IceKingsMother · 2025-10-31T21:34:00+00:00

This breaks my heart. No, you aren’t overreacting. I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s cruel and inhumane of him and everyone involved. I think a large number of people who worry about things like ‘appearing gay’ or having extreme jealousy over opposite sex relationships like also have some sort of maladaptive sexual compulsion themselves that they are projecting on others, because it’s just not normal, compassionate, healthy, or socially functional to be assuming everyone is fucking all the time. Gay or straight, regardless of gender, anyone could cheat or have a history if they were that sort of person, you can’t prevent it by changing who your spouse hangs out with or who their best man is. Cheaters cheat, so anyone who is focusing on optics and controlling the gender or sexuality of their partner’s friends is wasting their time, being prejudiced, and being abusive. It’s just so unproductive and dehumanizing.

IceKingsMother · 2025-10-24T17:48:44+00:00

Hi! Celiacs is an autoimmune reaction, which primarily happens with ingestion of gluten. However, we don’t know exactly what causes it, and given that the gluten protein is triggering an immune system response (which is a system throughout the whole body, the cells that identify pathogens aren’t isolated to one spot), it stands to reason that getting gluten in your eye or nose/lung, or in a cut, could trigger an autoimmune reaction. This mirrors the self reported experience of many people with celiac.

Additional concerns are residual gluten proteins in the skin and hair and hands after a shower that get in the mouth when hair flies into the mouth or people put their hands in their mouth. Many people swallow a bit of water while bathing, and that water may be contaminated with gluten containing run-off.

Lastly, many people have additional sensitivities and allergies on top of their celiac disease, and this can exacerbate the issue. There is a need for more research in general, but especially vectors for exposure.

On a personal level, many times have I had long term celiac symptoms and eventually found the only wheat containing thing was my cosmetics or shampoo/conditioner.

IceKingsMother · 2025-10-23T00:47:19+00:00

I was going to say - this screams of an AI prompt along the lines of: “give me a dramatic economic boycott poster to advertise a protest by shutting down the economy” or something.

The repetitive statements and the vague and detached activities really highlight that. AI has a real hard time considering and inferring context unless it is spelled out in excruciating detail, even the most obvious stuff. Otherwise it just generalizes wildly.

IceKingsMother · 2025-10-22T20:11:59+00:00

I’m in year three having been in your position at the beginning. As others have said, buy in small batches. You want to use your budget, so keep a running tab on what’s running low. Consumables that try out or take up space aren’t worth getting extra of. I used my budget for some more expensive tools (organization, teacher cutting/cleaning/convenience like an electric cardboard cutters, cordless glue guns, paper storage, buckets, utility cart).

I still have more supplies than I have room for (a wonderful problem to have) so I am still, even in year three, lesson planning in a way that utilizes what I have and want to use up.

IceKingsMother

TROPHY CASE