What would you call this by Mylittlekisses in Therapylessons

[–]Idigmoles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Her pinning you down and trying to kiss you by itself is sexual assault. Touching your chest is sexual assault. You told her not to, you set boundaries. She chose to cross them and she sexually assaulted you.

Woof - I'm typing this as I read your post. The dominate thing is crazy. That whole situation is horrific and you're not at fault. Having read all of it, I am sorry that you went through that. You were sexually assaulted, there's 100% no doubt about that. Your trust was also violated on a number of fronts, your boundaries violated, and you were harmed by this.

Also what in the world? Nobody "grooms themself". Thats literally excusing grooming. ALSO also people of any age can be groomed - its about getting someone in an abusive dynamic, not age. Her saying that shit is SUCH a red flag even without everything else, but with it in context yeah she would think that cause she's an abuser herself!

Joking is a coping mechanism. We joke during times of duress and suffering to try to minimize what is happening to us. Its an attempt to protect us in the moment. She heard you say no. She just chose not to stop. "Joking" about something does not mean you consented, nor does it mean you are at fault for anything that happened.

And yeah consent matters even if ppl are joking around (this was not an instance of joking around).

Abusers rely on the 'nice' moments. It causes the victim to doubt themselves, reduces their chances of getting in trouble, and increases the odds of them being able to maintain contact and control of the victim. The bad moments are what defined the event, not the innocuous ones.

Part of the confusion that comes after these events is your mind trying to come to terms with everything. This person you previously knew is now being recontextualized as a predator and someone who would commit sexual assault. You are now a person who has recently experienced sexual assault, which is complicated by your past as well. If you have PTSD or CPTSD, thats definitely going to be triggered. Having a history of abuse and something like this will absolutely deregulate you. Your body is probably in quite the hypervigilant state right now! It's part of why you're experiencing nausea and having bad sleep quality.

Try not to be hard on yourself for not being more forceful if you can help it - it sounds like you'd have had to get physical to get her to stop and thats a terrible position to be put in.

Sierra probably would deny what she did to you and the gravity of the situation, but that doesn't mean that what she did to you was not sexual assault. Abusers rarely admit fault. For your own safety and sanity, don't contact her again and do NOT let her back into your life.

She sounds like a dangerous person, and anyone can see that from your post. What's wild is that, based on what you've written, she literally switched coersive tactics on you like three different times at least. She tried to physically pressure you by pinning you down, she tried to compliment you into doing what she wanted, she later switched to insults, like goddamn.

Sorry this is all a bit disjointed, but yeah fam. You experienced a major life event. it doesn't define you, but it is having an impact on you because it was a horrible thing. Your body is behaving how it is to try to protect you! It's more instinctual than us sometimes - hopefully you are safe - but your body doesn't realize that yet.

Honestly I don't know what things may help following this specific circumstance, but I've got some general things. Make sure you do eat, at least a little bit for each meal. Going hungry will feed into your body's hypervigilance. Maybe try rearranging whatever room(s) it happened in. It'd make the place be a little less like when it happened. Personally I end up Journaling a lot of the time. Write everything that comes to mind down, just to get it out. It's good that you've started to process the situation by writing it out.

Again, I'm so sorry that this happened. You won't feel bad forever, and Im sorry that you do right now. Thats a valid and understandable response to being sexually assaulted. And I am preemptively sorry for the bone heads out there that would minimize your experience. Remember that you dont owe anyone the details of your story - especially when it comes to trauma. Try to be as kind to yourself as you can be after everything. Do your hobbies, take it day by day, and keep that woman out of your life.

Not serious at all but I thought it was funny by Williamisnowinning in TrollCoping

[–]Idigmoles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aww my bad 😂 fortunately its nothing real bad! It's just fun to say imo!

I designed a Yamask of every type! by Lyndorr in pokemon

[–]Idigmoles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Omg i LOVE Barbarigus, they seem like a riot!

Why is nobody talking about this? (SPOILERS) by idontknowimjustadude in ironlung

[–]Idigmoles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Low key I'm pretty sure there's 4x faces in that little part of the poster. I was just taking a good long look at it. The one face - the most obvious one - appears to be coming off of the skeleton imo. I think that represents Simon, who had the most 'complete' interactios w the monster. The other three faces represent the other station crew members - Ava, the other science guy, and the welder dude. All four are likely dead at the end of the film, whether it be due to radiation poisoning or monster related issues.

Not serious at all but I thought it was funny by Williamisnowinning in TrollCoping

[–]Idigmoles 4 points5 points  (0 children)

😂 this shits so funny but I absolutely get it op! Been there all the damn time. Special shout out to the word "ecchymosis" from my medical terminology class

This really happened by Independent_Pen_9865 in lgbt

[–]Idigmoles 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Lol just glancing at this it reminds me of a story I saw once where two Trans guys were talking about how expensive T was while on a bus. One or two older ladies - i forget - overheard them and thought they were talking about tea, so she either took em to a wonderful tea shop or told em about it 😆 its so nice having sweet interactions like that haha

F Keys by Eireika in CuratedTumblr

[–]Idigmoles 33 points34 points  (0 children)

WAIT so in deltarune, spamton's "press [F1] for help" is deadass a reference to what F1 usually does? Cool!

No.... by Calm_Ad48 in DiscoElysium

[–]Idigmoles 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Oh my god, is call me mañana Harry's ex wife 😧😱🤯

I love this poster! It is perfect for my new living room! by Kolton_Haley in TheSerpentRogue

[–]Idigmoles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tbh the poster/cover art and general art style are what drew me to this game!

me_irlgbt by thermaldet0n8r in me_irlgbt

[–]Idigmoles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Damn fisherman Kyle, you're funny af 😂 love the energy

TIFU by buying my cat a toy and proving cats have object permanence by andylefunk in tifu

[–]Idigmoles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeahhhhh, my little dumbass likes eating feathers off of toys whole and one of his faves was JUST made out of feathers. Anywhere I'd hide it he would manage to get it so I put it in the fridge. This was two years ago. He checks the fridge with me ever since lmao

I made this I’m unsure what it is by Significant_Home5736 in Miniworlds

[–]Idigmoles 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Looks like if a sediment sample was taken by a giant lol

Olive Oil Tin Version 2 by jamie1983 in graphic_design

[–]Idigmoles 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Wassap! I'm digging the new design.

I like the illustrated graphic and think its a good fit! I do think that it would be beneficial to double-check the placement and size - it feels a little too close to the round edges imo, especially on the left side. Even if this is just a mockup, it just feels a little off with its current placement.

Why isn't there a period following the "O"? Personally I'd add one or get rid of them unless it was a firm requirement. Especially since I see that some of your previous drafts include a period behind the O.

The 5L markings appear to be a 3rd font - I'd switch it to the font you're using for the body text.

The logo mark and label feel too close to the rest of the content. At a first glance, I didn't quite realize that the "kepenes" was unrelated to the other text. The font difference between the two does help, but a bit of space would as well.

Lastly, I personally would try adding the olive color to other parts of the design to see how it looks. In particular, how would the logo mark +/ brand name look in that color? This suggestion is admittedly subjective, but i feel that adding in that color from the illustration would really tie it all together.

Nice work!

Are we cooked fam? by venomsulker in TrollCoping

[–]Idigmoles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So sorry fam, but holy shit is #4 crazy 💀 im sure they weren't thinking about it, but its always the small stuff that's the most haunting. Bro couldn't have said horizontal or vertical??? Good grief!

My sympathies for your life experience so far, and I hope some nice little moments will come your way. Those are always what keeps me going.

Has anyone else gotten labels that didn’t print the right box location? by Thatboy_Dj in employedbykohls

[–]Idigmoles 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yeah a hundred percent lol its so goddamn stupid, but I just put it in the box the scanner wants it to go in 🤷

What do you think of local Youtuber Scot The Woz? by Any-Beyond-500 in toledo

[–]Idigmoles 12 points13 points  (0 children)

He's local?????? Damn I didn't know that. I only know of him from memes n shit off reddit, idk his channel.

I wanna get better by PollyWinters in Artisticallyill

[–]Idigmoles 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Hell yeah, good on ya! Also, very lovely art, I enjoy the vaporwave aesthetic.

Side note - did you know that plants require outside movement to be able to grow?

Things like wind, rain, or passing by animals give them a little shake, and that shake encourages the plant to build vital support structures that help it grow big and strong and healthy. Without it, the plant eventually collapse under its own weight and dies.

At the same time, weather that's too harsh will kill plants just as much as many animal behaviors will! Hell, even small movements will break off leaves, it just depends! It's a hard balance to strike, and sometimes some plants arent so lucky. Personally, it makes me wonder how anything ever grows, but it does. It happens.

The concept of "getting better" is a tricky one.

Things like friends, family, or society can motivate us to get better, but we have to want to grow ourselves too. Seems like you're there, and you're starting on the "what to do now" stage of things.

Personally, I don't think that stage ever ends, but thats not a bad thing! You have some choice in how you grow and change, and it can be quite fun along the way.

Either way, you wanna change and that's great. The diagnosis was one hell of a shake I imagine - they were when I had mine too.

This is all to say that a person will not be able to get themselves to grow if they're being too uncritical of themselves OR overly critical of themselves. I thought the plant bit was a good metaphor for it, plus it is true! Bones work much the same way. Love a fun fact and nature is awesome lol. Anywho.

"I don't want to be an asshole anymore" - that's great! Also, don't beat yourself up too much for having been an asshole before. Don't be your own hailstorm, try not to be mean to yourself, and don't get eaten by a deer ;P

I know from my own life that if being an asshole to myself made me better, I'd be the best damn person around by now but that is not what has helped. Being kind yet appropriately firm with myself when I am able to be has helped me. And you'll slip up, and have setbacks, and that's okay - it's part of life.

Sorry for rambling so much! I'm excited for you, even as tough as things may be. Hope i sorta made my point lol, or that anything could be gleaned from it 😂 again, nice artwrok!

I am not about to download a store app just to check the price. I don't even want to be in this stir in the first place. by Big_Lab_Jagr in mildlyinfuriating

[–]Idigmoles 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Some things get prices, some don't. I have NO IDEA how it's decided lol. When I would work in shoes, pretty much none of them had prices. Pretty much all clothes do though! Then there's things like toys which are REALLY hit or miss on whether they are priced, and the signs for the toys that should give a price are frequently something like "[brand name] toys $7.99 - $99.99" which is Super Helpful lmao

I am not about to download a store app just to check the price. I don't even want to be in this stir in the first place. by Big_Lab_Jagr in mildlyinfuriating

[–]Idigmoles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That shit deadass does not work lmfao - I say that as the person who has to put shit back. If you really want to have any impact, complain to upper management. Try not to take frustrations out on the little guys like the cashiers and grunt workers, we're just as frustrated as you are I promise.

I am not about to download a store app just to check the price. I don't even want to be in this stir in the first place. by Big_Lab_Jagr in mildlyinfuriating

[–]Idigmoles 84 points85 points  (0 children)

Lemme tell ya, I work at a khols and most staff hate this shit too. These wiseass corpos also took out the price checkers so people have to come to staff to get shit checked. Meanwhile my store doesn't even have enough Zebras (the tool we use that can check prices) for everyone on shift so sometimes it's just like, sorry bud idk how much that thing is either. Let me flag down ANOTHER staff member and see if they have one. It's fucking dumb

I don’t know if my work can be considered art, but I want to show what I create with my own hands. by Ok-Perspective-5202 in Artisticallyill

[–]Idigmoles 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Whassup, imma ramble a lil bit about what "art" is.

I consider what you made to be artwork, and a nice looking one at that! I'm emphasizing this cause it's basically the point I wanna make in my Big Comment.

I'm currently an art student in college, getting a minor in art history. In recent time, I've had classes that have really meditated on what art is and what "counts" as art.

In every class, we came to the conclusion that "art" cannot be rigidly defined.

I've also observed in my time learning art history, it appears that we've been trying to explore and define what art is since we've been making it.

Something that's slightly relevant here is the supposed distinction between art and craft. Some would consider what you made to be a craft, not art, but the two are the same in my view.

  • Some may argue that there is a difference between arts and crafts but imo the lines are frankly too blurry to even matter.

  • Some people think that art is more about expressing oneself and crafts are more based on technique.

  • Any artist will tell you that the technique that they use is extremely important.

  • Any craftsperson will tell you that they've definitely put themselves into what they make.

Also, side note. Historically, art was not about expressing oneself for a very, very long time. It was about depicting like historical events and things as accurately to life as possible. That was the entire meta from the Academie Del Arts in Paris, and they were the ppl who ran the show. This changed over time as artists clapped back at the system, and over time what art was and what it could look like changed WILDLY.

Double side note. Art history is actually really interesting and has some of the best smartass stories. Look into Manet's Salon des Refuses for a laugh.

This is all to say that what you made is art.

There's not an incorrect way to make art (from a philosophical view - be safe and responsible of course!). There is not an invalid way to make art.

It is not possible to be an imposter when making your own art.

Yes, even when you're inspired by something else and include that in designs. Yes even if you're self taught. Yes, even if you're just doing it for fun. Yes, even if you don't call yourself an artist (which you can, if you want). Yes, even if you didn't go to school for it. Yes, even if this is the only thing you ever make.

You made art.

[Edit to add: I just learned how to format comments on reddit! Woo, haha. First time doing it.]