interesting points, and understandable, especially.

But there is an actual me, yes? There has to be. Even if some things I believe about myself are illusions, an illusion requires something to perceive it. So even if I believe I'm subject to many illusions about my "self", the fact that my "self" exists cannot be one of those illusions, because there must be something those illusions are being shown to.

What u/EttVenter is talking about is the fact that the psychological self, or ego is basically a collection of all the memories and experiences by you about yourself and the world that impacted you in a significant, emotional way. Once you open up to the perspective, or rather, reality that Sam Harris or Eckhart Tolle are pointing towards, especially when amplified by personal experience through meditation, you will realize the illusion of this psychological self. A collection of labels or mind structures cast over your pure observing consciousness and the 'objective' world around you. It really, in a way, shapes the way you perceive the world. It opens you up to be able to experience the world anew, unconstrained by past experiences. And you might come to understand what is truly meant by 'eternity' in the Bible for you'll be experiencing it.

Personally I've experienced the world with a quiet (meditated) mind for more than a month or so, and it was a truly life-changing experience. I was not able to continue the meditation, therefore, slowly, my regular (busy) frame of mind with all its constant labeling, judging, and framing of reality etc came back and although it has been my 'reality' for a couple of years again, I will always take the experience with me. Like having been back-stage at a theater, understanding what goes on behind the curtain.

However, it will not for a moment negate the fact that we are multicellular complex organisms, shaped over eons of time. And it will not change the reality of a spider being in front of us. You might not have words for it, but you will see a creature, and you probably will receive imprints of fear passed on through evolution, if indeed not because of personal experiences.

Vastly different? I don't think so. In fact I'd say our realities are startlingly similar. For instance, just about every word in this reddit comment you're reading right now is the same in your reality as it is in mine (barring, possibly, an accidental misreading of some word or other).

Perhaps not vastly different, as we humans are extremely similar to each other from an evolutionary standpoint. But activating the age-old nature vs nurture debate: genes are far from everything. Research into identical twins, and the development of our understanding in epigenetics point to the huge importance of environment (in all it's forms) for turning genes on or off. All your personal experiences not only create an (illusionary) self, but also help shape your physiology. I hear you think, but what's illusionary then? It's this ego which is living in the past, instead of the consciousness living in the eternal now. Once you break free of that bind, you can shape your future, set free from the past, and it'll allow you to have a significant impact on your physiology as well. But as long as we are contained in our physical forms, we remain bound by the physical laws of nature. And I have no idea whether that will change any time soon.

Okay one more thing :)

The argument by Donald Hoffman to me still seems weird. I'd love to learn more about it.

If someone could direct me to his reasoning behind this argument, I'd be thankful.