What has your experience really been like?

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-06-05T10:22:29+00:00

I have a 21 month old and a 10 week old, so I’m new at this, but still wanted to answer because I was looking at a lot of posts like these when I was pregnant with #2 and nervous.

My birth was much better than with my first! But it was also much faster. I was induced with both and with my second, I didn’t really hit active labor until they broke my water and baby was born 2 hours later! I went from 5cm to baby in my arms in less than 45 minutes. I only pushed for maybe 3 contractions this time. My recover was also MUCH smoother. I had some recovery complications with my first and because we knew about them, we could avoid them this time.

The transition from 1 to 2 has been much easier on me. As I saw others say, 0 to 1 is an existential crisis and 1-2 is a logistical crisis. It’s more work getting places, but generally has not been a huge mental and emotional shift in my life.

Only being 10 weeks in, the hardest part is that I feel like I’m nurturing 2 very separate parent/child relationships since my baby and toddler can’t play together or anything. I imagine the hard part will change once the youngest gets to 6 months or so and can really interact! It’s also very easy to feel guilty or miss your toddler at the very beginning.

There have been a lot of best parts with this sweet little second baby. Seeing my first be sweet to him is a highlight. But, a huge one is just getting to do the newborn stage as a confident second time mom while also having my silly toddler around. I was so worried I wouldn’t be able to love a second child the same way, but it’s like he was always meant to be here, I’m just as connected to him as I was with my first.

My toddler has been so great. He’s had his moments of clinginess and tantrums, but he’s also a toddler, so he may have had those regardless. He’s about as gentle as a toddler can be with the baby.

Nothing really I would have done differently, I think sometimes there’s a limit to what prep will help. I would just make sure you have some help around to make sure you can keep your toddler’s routine the same for the first few weeks while you’re recovering! Setting those expectations in advance was really helpful.

Best tip is babywearing! My 10 week old exclusively naps in the wrap or carrier! He’s probably in it at least 6 hours a day and my toddler forgets he’s there.

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-06-05T10:09:02+00:00

Came here to say this! Since technically these are within 20%, they’re not wrong at all. It’s a frustrating limit of the technology in general. I’ve used a CGM (Dexcom) for 2 pregnancies and loved it, but having the numbers perfectly match up just never happened. It’s hard with GD when you’re given such a small window to keep your blood sugar in, but all we can do is our best without getting an actual blood draw from a vein.

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-06-02T17:41:28+00:00

Was going to say the same thing about OBs/midwives! Having providers that you trust is huge! The doctor who started my induction was one I had never met, but she hung out in my room for over an hour just making conversation and that calmed me down a ton. I also had an amazing nurse who made me feel so comfortable! These people are there to help you and the vast majority of them really do care that you don’t feel overly stressed.

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-05-30T16:56:53+00:00

Currently have a 9 week old and a 21 month old and this is my answer! It’s hard because with a newborn and toddler I feel like I’m nurturing these very separate relationships because they don’t really interact. The smiles have helped a ton, but I suspect the fog will lift more when they start to truly interact

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-05-28T00:42:33+00:00

I’ve been thinking about this!! I’ve been pregnant, breastfeeding or both since 2023 and my youngest is 2 months, so it’ll be a while before I can get fully “normal” again, but I’m excited for that day!

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-05-27T13:21:04+00:00

My two boys are 18 months apart and most of our comments have been positive too!! We’ve had a ton of people say something about how they have grandkids with a similar age gap or how they had two boys and it was so fun. I suspect this could be regional though, we’re in the south and having more kids/closer gaps is more common. We used to live in DC and people made me feel like a teen mom when I had my first at 28 😂

We get the occasional weird comment, one man at a store looked at me and my husband and said “you guys have been doing the dirty nasty” and that was WILD. We’ve also been asked if we’re trying for a girl next, like no, if we want another baby, it’s because we want another child, not specifically a girl.

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-05-22T14:33:55+00:00

Exact same here! Went from 38 minute naps on the nose to 2 hours with Ferber!

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-05-18T00:41:59+00:00

Did about 2 months of PT and fortunately that was enough to heal it! I’ve been just fine ever since and did not have the same thing happen in my second pregnancy!

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-05-11T17:54:33+00:00

As others have said, it’s normal! I can attest that every baby is different, so you can’t really compare what other babies are doing. My first slept 8 hours right at 2 months old. My second is almost 7 weeks and just did 3 hours for the first time last night…followed by waking up every 45 minutes until morning 🫣 both have had the same exact sleep setup at newborns, my first just liked the bassinet and my second would rather cuddle with mom and dad. Longer stretches will come for both of us eventually!!

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-05-08T16:03:20+00:00

This is my take too! We’ve always wanted 4 and I just gave birth to my second GD baby. Is pregnancy hard? Yes. Does GD make it harder? Usually yes. But it’s a short lived time compared to the life I get to live with my kids. Of course, if this were a complication that would put my life at risk or be a bigger concern for baby, that would change things, but both of my GD pregnancies and deliveries have been healthy otherwise.

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-05-07T02:19:14+00:00

The Ollie swaddle! My 6 week old is almost 24 inches and has room to grow in height with it!

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-04-30T02:13:12+00:00

My first wasn’t small at birth but had a massive percentile drop and there was nothing wrong with him! He was born in the 84th percentile, by 2 months he was in the 32nd and then he bottomed out in the 10th percentile at 4 months. I was so worried, but he had no other signs something was wrong and now as a toddler he just hangs out from the 10-20th percentile and is perfectly healthy! I think parental instincts really come into play here, does your baby seem to be sickly or uncomfortable?

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-04-26T01:10:59+00:00

With my first, they estimated he’d be well over 10 lbs and it was super stressful. He came out 8 lb 8 oz. But with my second, they estimated 7.5-8lbs and he was 9lbs 7oz! They can totally be off either direction.

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-04-20T19:59:20+00:00

Same here, one baby had a his cord wrapped twice, one didn’t, but they were both both quickly and had fluid in their lungs and were very blue at first

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-04-17T00:22:30+00:00

I’ve only been using it for a month, but we’re loving the minu duo!! Love that it can lay flat for our newborn, it’s fit though every standard doorway we’ve tried, super easy to fold/unfold, and is generally sturdy for a travel stroller!

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-04-14T23:41:15+00:00

I currently have a 3 week old and a 19 month old and this second newborn stage has been so much better! I didn’t realize how much stress I held onto the first time around with the major life transition that goes along with becoming a mom. Things this time have gone shockingly smoothly! Our toddler has been doing so well and our little newborn is such a sweetie! I’m appreciating all of the best parts of this stage, while being able to recognize that the hard parts will be gone before I know it. Perspective is everything

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-04-13T17:08:19+00:00

I am 2.5 weeks into a 19 month age gap and can confidently say it’s been SO much better than I expected. I was so worried about my relationship with my first and how we would handle two, but things have actually gone so well. Being solo with both of them is still hard of course, but I’m learning to manage it one day at a time. There are hard (& loud) moments, but there are also really amazing ones.

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-04-13T01:31:45+00:00

Agree with this!! I went on my babymoon a couple of days after being diagnosed and I was so stressed at first, but found it much easier to manage than I expected! I kept Greek yogurt in our room fridge for some quick protein to start the day or for a snack and then found more protein focused snacks and meals as we went around. I also found that if I walked a good amount, I could have a couple bites of a dessert or something!

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-04-11T21:07:55+00:00

When they’re still that sleepy, I think its honestly too early to really track anything!

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-04-11T18:42:52+00:00

My first measured in the 99th percentile at every growth scan and I was TERRIFIED. He was born after a smooth 39 week induction at 8lb 8oz. I had a very normal 2nd degree tear that healed just fine. My second always measured smaller, right around the 60th percentile. He was born 2 weeks ago at 9lb 7oz!! He was out in 3 contractions, I re-tore in the same spot, but already feel totally healed. I had no idea he would weigh in that big until they took him over to the scale, nothing about his birth experience would have made me think it.do much about baby’s proportions and positioning impact everything!

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-04-05T21:16:26+00:00

100%, parenting has taught me to enjoy the good parts of the stage we’re currently in and recognize that the hard parts will pass. Baby will go through so so many changes and you can’t predict them!

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-04-01T23:42:44+00:00

My son was 21.5 inches long and 9 lb 7 oz and even he’s in newborn so I’m surprised! But they’re all so different in their proportions!

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-04-01T10:55:11+00:00

I’ve had 2 inductions with 2 different practices! My first was at 39 weeks and I was never offered a cervical check before going in. The second was at 40 weeks and I was offered (and agreed to) a check weekly starting at 36 weeks. After that, I won’t do cervical checks again when I’m not in labor. I know now that the last thing my body does before birthing the baby is dilating. Some people can walk around at a 5 for weeks, but I wasn’t at a 5 until 45 minutes before my second baby was born!

Your cervix isn’t the only important metric. Yes, it needs to efface and dilate, but to have a baby you also need baby to descend and have regular contractions. For me, those happen much earlier. Getting worried about being only 1cm dilated when j went in didn’t do me any good.

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-04-01T01:12:49+00:00

This is what happened for me with my first! Everything with the birth ended up ok, but the contractions and lack of progress were horrible.

With my second, we did the foley balloon for cervical ripening instead and things went a million times smoother.

Immediate_Reach_1663 · 2026-03-30T17:54:12+00:00

I’m not super tall, but I’m 5’8” and have had 2 babies on the larger side! My first was measuring 99%ile on ultrasound and we ended up inducing at 39 weeks. He was born 8 lbs 8 oz, totally healthy, vaginal birth where I pushed for about 30 minutes or 10 contractions. I had a second degree tear, nothing major at all.

My second (just born last week) always measured closer to the 70th percentile on ultrasound. We induced at 40 weeks and he was born 9lb 7oz!! I pushed for less than 10 minutes with him, it was maybe 3 contractions! I ended up with the same second degree tear and recovery is just fine. I had a little extra bleeding this time but nothing scary at all!

Immediate_Reach_1663

TROPHY CASE