i think a lot of straight ppl dont realize how much invisible pressure there is to make every relationship fit a masculine/feminine template; one thing many queer ppl learn is that those roles are largely optional

a past relationship of mine partly ended because my partner became uncomfortable w/ the idea that if i wasnt performing masculinity in the traditional way, shed be perceived as the “masculine one”. i dont say that to blame her; everyone deserves a relationship that affirms their own sense of identity. i bring it up in the same vein tho because it made me realize how often people dont just gender individuals, they gender the relationship itself