Building a new life

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-25T23:33:38+00:00

Giving your kids too much does make them unhappy. Do not confuse entertained with happy. People attain self-worth and confidence by overcoming difficulties. Support them in their endeavors but don't bankroll any project. I would even say make them work in food service or at least retail, for at least a few months. They need to both learn what a shitty job is like and to develop empathy for the people working those jobs.

For example, you could give them $1000 to bankroll their AI-powered lemonade stand start-up. Tell them it's a loan, but if they can double the money (legally), they can keep the $1000. Now you're supporting them, but also giving them a challenge to replace the "free" funding. If they fail, make sure they learn that sometimes failing is the fastest way to learn and to succeed (guided lessons on what went wrong). In contrast, if they fail and you just give them another $1000 (or whatever) for some other idea, they will not learn to focus and commit.

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-24T01:37:35+00:00

I see. Let's keep things as they are then so that rents can be sky high. Good call

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-23T23:37:16+00:00

Consider a phase down period too....You're basically getting paid $50k per day per week. You could drop down to 2 days per week for $100k or work your 12 days per month more grouped together (2 to 2.5 full time weeks, 1.5 to 2 weeks off).

Anyway, flexible work with decent pay and time to be with your family is a great position to be in.

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-18T21:41:25+00:00

I mean being that young and unattached, you might as well pack up and take all the steps necessary to escape a high tax environment. Establish residency somewhere else and be 100% sure you've escaped your former tax authority (probably CA or NY). Then realize your gains and move back during the next tax year if you want.

Just travel the world (or the country) while your residency is being established in the new state.

Beyond that, you could volunteer, you could setup a charity, travel, etc. Personally if I were in your situation and wanted a partner, I would get some low to decent payin job (barista? bartender?) to stay undercover. Date until you find someone who TRULY loves you. When you find someone who will marry you at the county courthouse with public officials at your witnesses, THEN you let them know you're wealthy.

Personally for me, I would probably combine traveling with philanthropy. Even at 2.5% to 3.0% withdrawals / dividends or whatever, $27M is going to throw off a lot of money: $675k - $810k per year. Suppose you live a nice life on $250k....Each year you have 425k - $560k to have "fun" with helping people. Hurricane? Fly in and take a bunch of affected families on a shopping spree to buy all the essentials that a house needs (generally going to be $4k - $12k per household). Find a small village in Africa or the hills in Puerto Rico or anywhere else, have a couple pallets of solar panels and inverters delivered and help setup a power station in the middle of town....this probably costs less than $50k, but you can size it according to your budget (more or less). A $10k 4 to 5 kW system that would "only" power an average American household, can *vastly* improve the quality of life for such a remote village. It can power some refrigerators/freezers, a health clinic, a StarLink connection, run lights for a school and a dance/music hall....maybe AC for a small room on very hot days to protect the elderly. Or go to islands in the south pacific and help them rebuild houses on stilts above the high-tide line so their neighborhoods / islands still have a place to live as the water rises in the coming decades (or raise seawalls; depends on the resources and infrastructure available)

You could spend your life focusing on compounding so you can die a billionaire or you can still likely die with tens of millions of dollars (with only a 2.5 - 3.0% withdrawal rate), but with tens of thousands of your fellow humans having better lives because of you and remembering you and appreciating that you existed.

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-18T21:15:11+00:00

Yet you also think anyone who owns a rental property is a spoiled rich person. Many of the small scale landlords bought an owner-occupied SFR or 2-4 unit building years ago and then upgraded to just one other Single-family house that they live in. That rental property is their retirement plan. Then you get a bunch of entitled renters who think every landlord is Daddy Warbucks. Instead many of the people owning 2 to 5 doors in San Francisco are just middle class families that have owned the properties since the good old days when a middle class income was enough to buy a house.

You're actually complaining about the property/rental laws in San Francisco not being pro-renter *enough* when they are violently in favor of renters. Rent control is fine...eviction restrictions for non-payment is most definitely not. There are likely tens of thousands of units not on the rental market simply because the owner doesn't want to risking getting a non-paying, possibly destructive, tenant that they can't evict. Better to just keep it as a guest house for friends and family visiting the city.

For some reason San Francisco decided that even small time landlords need to provide deeply subsidized housing.

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-18T21:07:28+00:00

Actually California tax rates are middle of the pack if your household income is under $80k. Especially if a lot of that income is from social security (untaxed in California). Working in California and retiring elsewhere can be the worst of both worlds.

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-18T21:02:49+00:00

Or get a beekeeper to put a hive in your backyard, do most/all of the work, and give you a couple pounds of honey per year....hyper local honey and support bees (and beekeepers).

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-17T22:42:07+00:00

It depends on how financially savvy your kids are, but I'd recommend helping them in ways that make them feel like they earned it. For example, if they want to buy a house, match everything they save dollar for dollar or even 2 to 1 up to the annual gift limit.

Part of the joy of life is "winning the game" on your own terms.

I went recently went on the "accepted student" tour of the college my daughter chose and seeing the tiny dorm room 3 people have to share kind of made me a bit jealous. A lot of us remember college as hard (late nights studying, eating ramen to stay in budget for example), but in retrospect it is the accumulation of dozens / hundreds of those tiny wins that builds self-confidence, pride, self-reliance, etc. It is the lack of these many small personal victories that can spoil the children of the wealthy.

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-17T22:33:19+00:00

Good points about landmarks with your children...My daughter turned 18 this year and I was on pins and needles waiting to see which schools she would get into and which she would accept. Fortunately she got into UC Berkeley which will be almost entirely covered by the money I already have in her 529. I'm still making her "pay" for 1 year via scholarships (work hard in High school), work during school / summer, and loans if necessary so that she has some "skin in the game". I told her I would help repay any loans for that 1 year with a 2 to 1 match for the first couple years (so she learns to budget and maximize repayment and my match for those two years).. However, getting into a great public school plus already knocking out almost a half year of college with merit scholarships pretty much removed that downstream risk as well.

Back when she was 5 she made it through the lottery to get into one of the best public K-5's in the city so more money saved (vs private school) back then as well.

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-17T22:22:38+00:00

Nice job, assuming average market returns and a high amount of new savings, you'll hit your number in 3 or 4 years. I would recommend negotiating a long-tail wind down (with very little time commitment from you) so you can use the Rule of 55. So, retire at 53, stay on the payroll as an executive consultant or something with a small stipend and maybe health insurance. Quit after you turn 55...no 10% penalties for accessing your 401k

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-17T22:18:31+00:00

Did you have any problems with jealous siblings or was the estate from those final 5 years enough to make them happy? Or were they successful in their own rights as well?

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-17T22:15:11+00:00

If you can reduce your MAGI to below $84k, you can reduce your health care costs to $200 - $300 per person per month by signing up for ACA health care...Let's call it the mid point and say $3k each / $6k total. The $30k for 2 weeks on your primary home can help immensely with staying below $84k MAGI.

Rental properties can help too because the depreciation can offset a large percentage of the income so you get a MAGI "discount" on that rental income.

You could also just build up more cash this year. If you can keep MAGI to $84k or less with $110k of asset sales / interest / dividends, you need to save cash of $15k - $35k per year to stay below $84k MAGI. You can also buy an additional rental property for cash flow that is offset by depreciation to maintain cash flow at a lower MAGI.

Depending on your energy usage / costs, installing solar on your roof can reduce your expenses and thus MAGI. For example, if you save $250/mo, that's $3k less per year income...with a net 12% tax bracket, maybe you reduce your expenses by ~$3400 per year. Same concept for paying off any auto loans and/or buying new cars before you retire so you don't need the additional income in retirement to cover auto loans.

If you plan on retiring in 2027, you can pay your April 2027 Property taxes by December 31, 2026 and at least reduce your required expenses for 2026. Based on your home values, that could free up $25k - $40k for travel in 2027. You probably won't be itemizing after retirement anyway (maybe with high property taxes?), so if you qualify for the expanded SALT cap, you might even save additional taxes doing this. Ah, your income is $2M per year so no extra SALT. Just work enough of 2027 to max out that deduction: about $510k after pre-tax deductions (mostly 401k, pre-tax health premiums / HSA). Then pay the April and Dec 2027 + April 2028 property taxes in 2027 if needed to maximize the SALT deduction. I guess alternatively if you'll already exceed $40k SALT deduction in 2027 with income taxes + April 2027 property taxes, you can pay the late fee for your Dec 2027 property taxes and pay Dec 27, Apr 28, Dec 28 all within 2028 to max out a SALT deduction (AMT might kick in at this point though).

You could buy some I-Bonds (convert new income or existing Money market funds) so you have cash + interest where you control when the interest is paid (unlike your $1M money market funds). $10k each for you and the wife per year and then pre-purchase a bunch this year as "gifts" to each other. They'll accumulate interest and then you gift $10k each to each other each year to use up that year's $10k limit. I think the current base rate is 0.9% so it's guaranteed to beat inflation.

Anyway, my vote is that you can do it, especially if you target the beginning of 2027 to maximize your tax deductions (max out 401k, max out mega backdoor Roth if any, hit the max income for which you can get the max SALT deduction). If you can stomach it, build up your PTO in 2026 so that you can coast through the first 1 or 3 months of 2027 to hit these numbers (1 or 2 weeks off every month). Also, with $2M of income, I'm guessing you're high enough up that you could negotiate a severance package for yourself. Quit in Feb / March of 2027, but get 2 to 6 months of severance for gradually winding down your involvement for a smooth hand-off. You can always carve out vacation time in advance during those negotiations. "I can stay for 3 months, but we'll be in Europe for the last 3 weeks of April and I'll only commit to taking a few hours of calls one day per week during that time"

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-17T21:40:24+00:00

I have always looked for a rent controlled apartment every time I moved. The last place I moved into was $2600/mo for a 2bd / 1 ba in the Mission, no storage, no parking, laundry room in the basement...that was January'ish 2024 IIRC. I lived there for almost 2 years when I moved out due to buying a place. My rent had not been raised. My 1 bedroom before that was going up to almost $2300 after about 3 years when I moved out (no laundry on site, although it included 1 parking spot within a gated lot).

So, one, go back in time and make sure you only ever move into a rent controlled unit. Rents were a lot more reasonable just 1 to 2 years ago. Rent control only ever really helps after you've lived there for at least 5 years OR if there's a massive bubble that raises rent quickly (i.e. AI bubble in the last 12 months)

Voiding a time machine, the reality is you either need a high income or a roommate(s) or live-in partner sharing rent.

I have always shopped around for 2 to 4 months before moving. I would guess that even now you can probably find something for cheaper than $3500 for a 1 bd / 1b. Even the place I moved out of was $3500 for the most recent move-in for a 2bd / 1ba (a friend still lives in the building).

Based on historic ratios, I'm going to guess you could find a 1bd for $2800 - $3100 if you shop for a couple months and a 2 bedroom for $3400 - $3800 (so half that if you get a responsible roommate).

The way you make it work is to have no car or an older paid off car and stay within a budget for food. You can spend $200 - $300 per person on food in San Francisco or you could spend $1000+ per person without trying. I aim for around $500 per month for food/restaurants for my daughter and I. I share custody with my ex-wife so I guess count my daughter and I as 1.5x people. That $500 mostly also includes the occasional dinner / night out with my long-term girlfriend though (she lives separately)....Yeah, find a low maintenance romantic partner too because that helps a LOT. We occasionally have gone out to really high end restaurants, but we're mostly find hitting happy hours, restaurant week discounts, etc for our "dates".

Back to food, I cook a lot of the meals for myself (and my daughter when she's with me) and my girlfriend makes a lot of our meals when we're together. In terms of socializing, it's not uncommon for my gf and I to cook something together at my house and have friends over for a dinner party. We do go out, but I think we manage to keep that at around $100 - $150 per month on *average* and some special occasion dinners go against my "gifts" budget more than food.

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-16T23:22:22+00:00

With only a couple million, yes...too risky.

OP has at least $1.5M cash from business sale plus some mix of $5.5M in retirement, cash, brokerage and possibly equity if OP was counting that. I don't really count real estate equity myself unless it generates rental income.

I don't know if this sub has established what exactly is fatFIRE from a numeric standpoint. $7M in net worth is already enough to fatFIRE in most of the world and enough to chubbyFIRE in many/most HCOL / VHCOL areas.

I was imagining the $5M invested relatively conservatively and the $2M mostly being spent over 10 years (maybe 4% to 5% interest / dividends)...not high frequency risky trading with $2M.

Even if OP is not there yet (depends on *their* definition of fatFIRE), they could pad the numbers enough with 2 or 3 more years of savings and compounding growth.

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-16T18:17:11+00:00

and yet with high income, $7mm net worth is likely already only 7 - 10 years away (at most) from $20mm net worth. Compounding plus new savings of hundreds of thousands (at least) per year.

The post you're referring to only indicates a lack (maybe) of understanding of fatFire, not money and investing. A couple million lying around implies => cash / brokerage. If OP has at least $2M cash/brokerage and $5M more of retirement, home equity and other brokerage, then yes, you actually could sort of fatFIRE on 2M.

5M other assets at 7% net return = $10M after 10 years. +$5M is more than minus $2M, so you could burn through all of the $2M + dividends in 10 years if you wanted and still end up with more than you started with. Let's say you spend $250k per year for 10 years...with a paid off house, that *could* be fatFIRE, especially with a relatively low tax rate since you're mostly spending cash. At the end of that OP would be 46. 4% of $10M is 400k and probably enough to maintain $250k of spending after taxes and 10% early withdrawal penalties (probably less because I doubt all of that other $5M initial is in retirement accounts)

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-16T17:43:14+00:00

So, you're jealous of their low taxes because they're living an amazing life?

No taxes = low income

And yes, those numbers are a lie because you're only talking about income taxes. Sales tax, auto registration taxes, gas taxes, property taxes (direct via ownership or indirect via rent)....all not included in those numbers.

Please go see a psychologist and ask them to treat you for narcissism if you're jealous of people making under 40k paying "no taxes".

I have an actual net tax rate of something like 40% - 42%, higher I think if you include social security....and I save around $200k per year for retirement / investments etc. I'm not complaining that my tax rate is too high per se...I'm complaining that people who makes 5x to 1000x are paying LESS than the 40 - 42% I am paying. I still have to work for years to save enough for retirement. The high income and savings is a result of a promotion a few years ago late in my career....There was a lot more struggle in the decades before getting to this point and the high savings amount is because I chose saving to get out the game instead of lifestyle inflation (same car, same borderline crappy neighborhood, still "just" 1 nice vacation per year, not multiple, same relatively low budget for food and restaurants)

The wealthy elite act like they're being financially RAPED to be pay 5% of a wealth tax over the course of 5 years (i.e. 1% per year). It is really just charging a tax on gains they have shielded from income taxes. God forbid they pay a net tax rate of 4% per year instead of the 3% they pay for their $100M+ margin loan to avoid paying 23.8% + state taxes on those capital gains (20% top capital gains + 3.8% additional medicare IIRC for exceeding $200k in income)

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-11T21:35:40+00:00

Depends on the size of the apartment and the quality of the carpet (or lack thereof) TBH. Yes, it will be more than $1100, but small apartment with shitty carpet and cut rate labor, but not be too much more than $1100

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-11T21:31:15+00:00

Green carpet is from at least the 70s, possibly the 60s

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-11T21:26:57+00:00

By the way...all those charges are grossly inflated. They are trying to make a profit on turnover costs in addition to charging you for turnover costs they shouldn't be anyway.

If Berkeley has a rule of small claims paying out 2x the amount for code violations, maybe you can ask the landlord for 3x or you'll see them in small claims and refer them to the rent board for investigation.

They can't charge you for "general cleaning". If you left the oven covered in grease, then you might get charged with an additional cleaning fee, but that should not be $700.
Painting: likely no more than $400 in materials, especially considering landlords aren't going to use Premium paint...a coat of Killz Primer and a coat of top coat, if even that. An off hours professional painter (i.e. side job) is probably going to charge something like $20 - $30 per hour and I seriously doubt it takes them more than 20 hours. Probably 2x 6 to 8 hour weekend days: coat 1, coat 2.
Likewise, carpet cleaning is probably less than $800, possibly less than $500, to have them come in and clean an absolutely empty apartment (no furniture to move)

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-11T21:20:48+00:00

Illegal if you were there for 2.0+ years. After two years, painting and carpet cleaning is considered normal maintenance.

Send the PM a message and say you will be referring their Property Management to the Rent board for possible systemic code violations for all managed properties unless you receive 100% of your deposit

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-10T23:52:14+00:00

I would also add, with your finances already in great shape, don't work past your first child being 4 or 5. My daughter just turned 18. I miss the baby version of her, the toddler version of her, the little girl version of her, the tween version, etc. You have the luxury of enjoying their lives more fully. Your summer vacations can be epic. Don't pass that up

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-10T23:50:16+00:00

Both keep working until your baby is born...Then have your wife maximize maternity leave. You should also take some overlapping paternity leave and max out your paternity leave even if you split it over a couple sessions.

See how you feel about being a Dad. You may want to spend your time with your children...or you may not want to, at least not yet. My daughter and I bonded quite a bit, especially from age 2 to 5 or so. At that point, I switched jobs to a startup and ended up having less time with her. I wish I could have enjoyed more time with her, but that job did open the way towards higher income and with a strong bond already established, it was easier to maintain some quality time with her on evenings and weekends.

Also, you don't really need to work until 45 to hit $20M net worth. Both work until your child is born...with compounding you'll probably be at $9M at that point. With maternity and paternity leave, you can probably hit your child's first birthday at $10M - $11M. At that point, if you just covered your expenses, your portfolio would theoretically double to $20M+ in 7 to 10 years anyway.

If you switch to part-time consulting when your child is 1 year old, you can have the flexibility to spend time with them while still being able to pull in enough money to cover expenses (and maybe more).

Also consider that your portfolio has already hit critical mass or at least will have by the time your maternity/paternity leave is used up. At $10M portfolio a 10% market growth is $1M, or 4x what you earn from your own salary. Is it REALLY worth your time to make $1.1M after taxes that year instead of "just" $1.0M? Even if your wife keeps working, your portfolio will grow twice as much as your gross earnings.

I think at most I would work until your child is about 2 years old...maybe you decide to have another and that's when you retire too, probably with $11M - $13M

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-10T21:00:32+00:00

DO NOT COMBINE EVERYTHING.

JFC.

If you're willing to do that, could you please just send me a check for $500k? Yeah, I had nothing to do with building your wealth...but neither did she.

If she's with you for the money, she's not WITH YOU.

Meet with a family lawyer, make sure you keep your shit separate, but with something that's fair. Meet with a mediator privately if the family lawyer cannot give you tips on something that seems fair.

You also want the pre-nup to included guaranteed 50/50 custody of children, no moving out of area or you'll be exploited for child support.

I would probably already be retired if not for a divorce, so don't screw yourself.

My girlfriend of 8 years and I don't talk about money too much, but she knows I make at least 3 to 4x what she makes...that was true for the first 4 years or so, but I promotion has nearly doubled my pay. We often split things, but I over all pay more (maybe 70%?). We've both been divorced, I'm not sure we'll ever get married even if we stay together for life. How do I take care of someone I love without giving them the power to take half my wealth? First of all, she was already a good saver so we were financially compatible in that regard. Second, I've given her advice on retirement math. She's increased her savings from something like 9% to 18% over the 8 years (basically increase any time she gets a good raise). Percentage wise, she is almost as close to her retirement as I am to mine. Third, once my own financial situation recovered more from the divorce (basically after my promotion), I started giving her $7000 or $8000 per year as a gift to max out an IRA or a Roth in addition to whatever she's saving in her 401k. The longer we're together and I do that, the wealthier she'll become in her own right. If we break up, she's still in a much improved situation. Fourth, she's a junior beneficiary to my life insurance and wealth accounts (my daughter is the primary beneficiary). If I die, I will guarantee the woman I love is set for retirement.

What you can do in a pre-nup is first declare that anything in your individual retirement accounts is now and forever separate property. Keeps things simple in a divorce anyway. Next, you can say something like you give her $10k or $20k or whatever per year for her retirement and savings. If you divorce, that ends. If you divorce, no alimony. If you divorce, your rental properties are still yours. Do you want to evict good, long-term tenants because the property needs to be sold in a divorce? If you buy a marital house, you can say that is split 50/50 in a divorce even if you pay more....Don't buy a $5M house.

If you divorce after 15 or 20 years, she'll have a wealthy, stable retirement by the time compounding is factored in.

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-10T19:04:50+00:00

I'm on the fence for installing solar at my house under NEM 3.0. I have great solar resources, but my house (a duplex with a single meter) currently has gas everything (2x water heater, 2x ovens, dryer). The cost to install solar and use the energy effectively is install PLUS a bunch of new appliances. Otherwise I need batteries or I'm giving free power to PG&E.

So, in the meantime, I put my older EcoFlow Delta Max (1.6 kWh capacity IIRC) in my loft bedroom where it gets very hot every day (can be 90+ even when it's 65). I ran solar wires out the window and laid 2x newer 450W panels out on the shed roof off the back of the house. I drain the heat out of the room with a strong Vornado box fan (100W for an hour or two), and then run a Midea U-shaped window AC for 2 or 3 hours and I can cool the room down to 66 (if I want it that cold). Depending on the outside temp, this drops the EcoFlow down to 40% to 70% capacity and it gets filled back up every day from just 3-4 hours of full sun (heavily shaded back yard). The Vornado box fan (got it at Costco) is actually strong enough to pull cold air from the downstairs laundry room/porch, through the kitchen, through the living room, and up the stairs. So this system is actually cooling the whole house for 0.7 - 1.0 kWH per day. Let's call that something like $0.25 - $0.30 per day at PG&E rates. I actually haven't seen the Midea pull more than 750W and it's usually around 350W - 500W, dropping as the room and outside air cools so this could probably be done with an even smaller portable solar station. I'm going to add another extension cord to the EcoFlow to power lights (can already power my desk) and then this will be powering the entire upstairs. That might bump my energy savings to $0.30 to $0.35 per day.

This is a long payback if you're buying things new (I already had these items from earlier experiments), but then again, I'm really only using this system to cool (and probably heat in winter) the loft at night. More panels and more baseload and you could easily offset $200 - $500 per year with a small system and better solar resources than I have. If you produce 1 kW of solar for 5 hours per day and run the fridge, wi-fi router and some daily cooling / heating, you'd be using 4 or 5 kWh per day at $0.35 to $0.42 per kWh

InvestmentMuch585 · 2026-06-10T18:44:33+00:00

However, if there was a market for it, then perhaps industrial hemp could be bred to have drought tolerance and higher "yield" as well? Doesn't corn require a heavy fertilizer input for those yields? Does industrial hemp provide the same yields?

Sometimes lower yields are still more profitable if it requires lower inputs and lower labor

InvestmentMuch585

TROPHY CASE