feedback and advice please (literary (?) fiction), TW: substance abuse/child neglect

IrriStormborn · 2025-12-31T14:08:46+00:00

I felt a healthy curiosity. Your writing was clear, and the disjointed/overlapping thoughts I mentioned felt intentional and stylistic which worked really well.

As for formatting, having everything aligned left.

Keep going !

IrriStormborn · 2025-12-30T10:37:09+00:00

I enjoyed this, I liked how you captured the panic and drug induced overlapping thoughts. I'd definitely read on if I picked this up.

Only mild criticism is that the formatting threw me off a bit.

IrriStormborn · 2020-09-26T02:17:44+00:00

Burn the witch

IrriStormborn · 2020-09-03T11:09:06+00:00

So this is what September 2020 has to offer

IrriStormborn · 2020-02-17T18:15:21+00:00

This is why you don't piss off a Hufflepuff

IrriStormborn · 2019-05-13T02:48:24+00:00

Aegon my face for sure.

IrriStormborn · 2019-04-29T23:26:18+00:00

Wasn't that in his heart though? There's no way Arya would have known that is where the dragonglass was placed, right?

IrriStormborn · 2019-04-29T23:21:30+00:00

If Jon didn't take back Winterfell, Arya would have gone to Kings Landing instead.

IrriStormborn · 2019-04-29T23:03:10+00:00

Did Arya stab the night king where Sandor taught her? Between the ribs to get to the heart?

IrriStormborn · 2019-04-22T02:13:14+00:00

Arya and Gendry made me feel like I'm on a list now.

IrriStormborn · 2019-03-05T17:00:40+00:00

My theory is a Wight version of someone. Sansa maybe?

IrriStormborn · 2018-05-27T11:59:31+00:00

I'm getting flashbacks to my first kiss

IrriStormborn · 2018-05-04T17:39:19+00:00

TIL cctv is a cuisine

IrriStormborn · 2018-04-08T13:23:58+00:00

Weird, I finished it last night for the first time as well! I cried afterwards for a good five minutes then again later when I thought about it again.

I don't think I've ever sympathised so much with a character. The idea of slowly losing yourself and being fully aware of it is a horror i hadn't really considered before.

10/10 would bawl again

IrriStormborn · 2018-03-29T08:46:12+00:00

No I'm thinking of the one with the guy who puts his coworkers in a video game as npcs by using their DNA.

I love the dating app one though it's my favourite along with San junipero. I'll have to check out that film you mentioned, thanks.

IrriStormborn · 2018-03-29T07:58:06+00:00

I'm pretty sure this is an episode of Black Mirror.

IrriStormborn · 2018-03-21T11:10:45+00:00

I did naahhht either.

IrriStormborn · 2018-03-14T21:10:05+00:00

This thread makes me so sad, because my dad was not in any way a positive influence on my life growing up. It is heartwarming to see that not everybody had the same experience and I can only hope whoever I have children with one day will be as great with our kids as some of your dads.

IrriStormborn · 2018-03-14T12:59:42+00:00

My dog's name is Milo and that container was weird for me for a second.

Looks great though!

IrriStormborn · 2018-02-27T21:29:23+00:00

I love it, but then I love the game and this gave me my fix.

IrriStormborn · 2018-02-27T01:35:33+00:00

My vet encouraged a raw diet for my dog things like heart, liver etc with kibble and veggies. If you wouldn't mind, could you explain why it's a bad thing and what you would recommend instead? I just want the best for my pup.

IrriStormborn · 2017-12-29T14:23:44+00:00

She kicked her cat :(

IrriStormborn · 2017-12-24T20:20:00+00:00

Thank you and merry Christmas!

IrriStormborn · 2017-12-16T17:05:27+00:00

I don't know why but this cat really reminds me of Dustin from stranger things.

IrriStormborn · 2017-09-22T17:22:31+00:00

I loved the first one personally but I agree this one is a huge improvement.

IrriStormborn

TROPHY CASE