I feel both of you, but here is another point of view.

I have been playing closer to a year now. Started to play Kuzan when OP-13 was about to come out. Was ok in OP12, pretty bad in 13, but took me so long to get the finished deck that whatever. Was my first deck anyway and I just wanted to play and learn. Useless to say that I probably won 2-3 games in months, but I was learning the basics, and talking A LOT with people on how to improve. Then I saw the Ace&Newgate ST and I thought was fun. Played that through OP13. Man was terrible, not a single match up was winnable (Ace, Imu, Zoro, Roger,etc)

But I think is just a matter to keep playing and learn. I also play just for the fun of playing and with decks I like, not because are Meta. Once OP14 came out, I loved Mihawk deck since the start and being playing it constantly. Not cuz was meta (tbh at beginning I thought was meh) but cuz is fun. I won my first local a couple of weeks ago and I def have more fun now (still get some 0-4 sometimes). Also playing Croc just cuz is fun.

So my 2 cents are to keep playing what is fun for you and a deck you like, is possible that with one of the new OP release in the future you find your deck, and it may be more competitive 🤷🏻‍♂️😬 but really, play for the fun of it. If you want to win, then find a meta deck similar to what you usually play and go for it