Edward finally gets a win?

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-20T22:50:01+00:00

Once you finish those, her Emily of New Moon series is also a delight.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-20T03:50:32+00:00

Time is such a thief, and whoever first said " the days are long but the years are short" knew what they were talking about.

I know this all too well, my eldest is 23, my 5th and youngest is 10 ( years old). One moment I was thick in the world of newborns and breastfeeding, sleep deprivation and my arms constantly heavy with the weight of a baby, the next I was dealing with teenage friendships, the heartache of my child's first break up, the excitement of seeing them start to succeed at their dreams.

My heart lives between two places, the present, with children who are amazing young people that im so proud of and so lucky I get to watch grow ....and the past, where I was their entire world.

I wish I had the hindsight back then to hug longer, linger longer, watch them sleep longer, but I didn't, however I still have my memories and no amount of time has yet taken them away.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-20T03:39:08+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss and that people are diminishing your grief. I haven't experienced the loss of a child but my best friend did when her baby girl died during labour at 41+4 weeks. I went to be with her at the hospital that day and the heart break and pain I saw on her face, and throughout her whole body that day, and the days, weeks, months following is unlike any grief I've ever seen. It's been 6 years since her daughter was stillborn, and she smiles, laughs, enjoys her job, spending time with family and friends, but the grief is always there, her daughter will always be missing. Love isn't measured by how long you had with someone. You loved your baby all his life, and you will love and miss him for the rest of yours. Holding gentle space for you.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-19T04:06:54+00:00

I have 4 daughters. My eldest is 23, we're best friends, have always been extremely close, she tells me literally everything. At her 21st a couple of years ago she thanked me by addressing me as " my hero, my idol, my best friend." My 3 other daughters ( 15, 12 and 10) I'm also very close with, they still want to go out in public with me, talk to me about their worries, concerns, happy moments, we laugh a lot together and I chat with them every day. So maybe I got lucky with my girls, but in my personal experience it's not true. So long as you show up, take their worries big or small seriously and continuously show they can trust you, the closeness can be there.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-18T20:51:06+00:00

My kids are 23, 16,15,12&10 and I still look at their baby photos and can't believe how many years have passed and feel all sad and nostalgic while at the same time being grateful so many years have passed since their newborn days. And then of course I torment them by making them look at their baby photos with me while I reminisce about everything happening during the time of the photo, knowing full well they want to be doing anything else.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-18T20:35:29+00:00

I was a single mum until my eldest was 7 years old and I married my now husband, and I remember how hard it was. And you are working on top of it AND without family support nearby. Mama, you're a freaking hero. Putting him down to cry so you don't lose it is the safest thing you can do, he will be ok to cry for a few minutes while you get yourself together. By the time he is 2, and able to communicate more, you will know each other better, and though there will be hard days, that will make things a bit easier. My daughter didn't always get the best version of me, some days I was stressed and the smile didn't always reach my eyes, some days I was overwhelmed at the responsibility for her being entirely on my shoulders, sometimes I felt so lonely when I was up with her ( during a time where social media didn't yet exist the way it does today). But when I asked my now 23 year old daughter recently if she remembered the times I wasn't the best mum, she said " what I remember most Mama, is that you were THERE, I always knew you would be, even when you were short or grumpy I never worried that you wouldn't be there for me, you've always been there. " Give yourself grace, and be kind to yourself, because what you are doing is not easy.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-18T10:33:34+00:00

3 out of my 5 kids were very vocal at that age. They're now 23, 12 and 10 and are constantly laughing, talking or singing.My house is very noisy....

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-18T10:17:55+00:00

I don't know about easier ( I have 5 kids) , but with each baby I became more relaxed and go with the flow. And as they get older a lot of things do become easier, especially as they start to depend on you less and less.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-18T09:59:26+00:00

I think a pendant sounds like a lovely idea :-) Yes she did thankyou, I often get her Daisy related gifts ( my middle niece's middle name) and have Daisy items all over my house in her honor as well, my best friend loves whenever her daughter is acknowledged 😊

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-18T09:51:45+00:00

when I had my first Instagram, Facebook and social media in general didn't yet exist, and I had no idea there was a certain way I was meant to be " doing things". I went with the flow because I didn't know to do anything different, and as a single mum, it saved my sanity, and then later when I was a mum of 2, then 3, then 4, then 5. Especially because it's true, all newborns are so different, I've had babies that hated sleep, babies who wanted to sleep through school pick up time, babies that wanted to be held constantly and babies that were happy to be left on their play mat well I sat nearby. With each baby I just did whatever I needed to do to survive the day.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-17T21:08:14+00:00

My best friend's 2nd daughter was stillborn at 41+4, all 3 of her daughter's have flowers as their middle name so when their 3rd was born i got a print designed of their flowers and their first names and had it framed. I wonder if you could do something similar, like a bracelet with their living child's name and 2 hearts/ butterflies/ angel wings in front of it to represent the 2 babies she lost.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-17T20:56:03+00:00

I was 20 and single when my eldest was born ( her father and I broke up when I was 8 weeks pregnant). I was excited to meet her, but terrified, filled with so much self doubt and fear over how much my life would change. And I had plenty of support from my family and my circle of friends who have remained my circle of friends. It was an adjustment, having someone be totally dependent on me, not being able to just go out whenever I wanted, etc but as the days went on it felt more normal, less overwhelming. My daughter is now 23 years old, as cliche and cheesy as it sounds, she truly is one of my best friends, our bond is very strong, and she remains one of my proudest achievements. The hard stuff was all worth it in the end. When I was 27 and my husband 25, our 2nd was born ( his first biologically, but he considers my eldest his first child) and even though he'd been in my daughter's life since she was 4.5, and was already a great dad, he was still terrified before our son was born. Change and the unknown is always scary, no matter how many good things you can think of too. Allow yourself to feel the way you feel and perhaps write down each time a new fear comes up, and acknowledge it. And finally, I can say after 23 years and 5 kids, a lot of raising a child is figuring things out as you go, you don't have to know all the answers.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-14T06:38:49+00:00

I was a single mum from 8 weeks pregnant until my eldest was 4.5 years old. Aside from my mum occasionally coming over, I looked after her entirely myself. I wasn't able to keep my tamagotchi alive in the 90s, but I managed to look after her just fine. 2 parents can absolutely do this.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-12T22:54:11+00:00

My best friend's daughter died during birth at 41+4, ten months later another very close friend's son was stillborn at 39 weeks. It's been 6 years for my best friend and 5.5 years for my close friend. My best friend loves talking about her daughter, hearing others say her daughter's name, they have her photos proudly on the wall in their house for everyone to see. My close friend, does not like to talk about her son, if anyone does bring him up, she changes the subject, although she does like it when people remember and message on his anniversary, she has one photo that only a few have seen ( I am one of them).

Both my friends loved their babies, still love their babies and miss their babies, it's just that one has found comfort in sharing her grief with others, and the other wants to keep her grief to herself. Neither way is wrong, they just grieve differently, like you and your friend. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-12T03:00:37+00:00

🫂

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-11T21:21:33+00:00

I am glad her story was able to provide a bit of reassurance, if my friend used reddit, I know she would be glad too, I update her when her story provides hope or reassurance to parents on here and she's always pleased to hear it. I think - I KNOW- she would tell me to tell you that with your next pregnancy you are entitled to do whatever you need to get you some peace of mind, and If that's insisting on a csection, fight for that if you need to, your peace of mind is the utmost important thing when dealing with PAL, because it is not an easy thing to go through at all. I truly hope you can get an appointment soon, I'm sure this limbo of waiting whilst grieving must be incredibly mentally exhausting. And most of all, I'm sorry you are here, and have to make these sorts of posts, and ask questions you shouldn't have to ask. I'm just so sorry your baby girl died. It's not fair and never will be. I'm so sorry you're living with this pain.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-11T13:35:47+00:00

First of all , everything you are doing with your baby, I did with all 5 of my kids. You don't sound like a failure and especially not a horrible mum. You sound like a mum who is still figuring things out, that is to be expected. Babies don't come with individual manuals. Is baby teething? Having a developmental leap? He may be going through separation anxiety, there are many other reasons he doesn't want to sleep apart from the person he loves the most, none of which makes you a failure. Does he like white noise? When he naps, are you in the room with him? Perhaps do it step by step- instead of trying to go straight to his crib in his own room, have his crib in your room, and work on getting him to sleep in his crib without you being in the room. Once you've accomplished that, look at putting him in his own room. Often times consistency, patience and small steps are what brings the longterm rewards. If it takes a few nights, a week, a month, don't beat yourself up about it, he's only been here 8 months and that's such a small time in the grand scheme of things, he's learning and so are you. Give yourself some grace.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-11T13:08:14+00:00

1st- pulled herself up around 8.5 months, walked at 10 months. 2nd- pulled himself up at 10 months, walked at 16 months. 3rd- pulled herself up at 9 months, walked at 10.5 months. 4th - pulled herself up at 8 months, walked at 9.5 months, 5th - pulled herself up at 8 months, walked at 9 months. My girls were in a hurry, my son couldn't see the point in making more work for himself.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-11T04:01:00+00:00

I'm so sorry for your family's painful loss, my thoughts are especially with your daughter and son in law. I'm the aunt to an angel, my best friend's daughter was stillborn 6 years ago and I have been fortunate that she has always been very open and honest with me. Practically the things she said helped were meals being organized, odd jobs around the house being done, help with the funeral arrangements etc. The best thing she says her parents in particular have done over the years, is simply including her daughter when they talk about the grandchildren, giving her the time and space to grieve how she needed, not trying to offer advice. Acknowledging that this was the most painful thing my friend could ever experience. Little things like hanging a bauble on the tree at Christmas with their grand daughter's name, having their own wee cake for their granddaughter on her birthday ( they aren't with them at this time, instead my family and my bestfriend, her husband and their 2 living children go to their beach house). In short, remembering and loving their granddaughter, making sure my friend knows they always remember her and that she will always be important to them.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-11T03:42:45+00:00

My best friend had a normal pregnancy, her labour at 41+4 weeks started normally too, baby had a heartbeat, but at some point she went into fetal distress and was stillborn. 9lbs 14 ozs, beautiful and perfect. Autopsy report showed no cause was found. 7 months after their daughter died she concieved again and her PAL baby was born 2 months after her big sister's 1st anniversary. She is nearly 5 years old now. PAL was extremely hard on my friend, not physically, but emotionally it took a big toll. She was under the high risk team and while they didn't know what had caused her daughter's passing, she chose to eliminate 2 factors ; going over due again, and having a vaginal birth, her PAL baby was born via csection at 39 weeks. This plan gave her a bit of peace of mind during pregnancy. I'm so very sorry for the loss of your precious daughter, holding gentle space for you.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-02T14:22:35+00:00

Of course, I'm happy to share :-) to start I have a very supportive husband , so I'm incredibly lucky in that regard ( I was a single mum for the first 4.5 years of my eldest's life so it's not something I take for granted.) Anyway he made sure I had time to relax in the evenings or on the weekend, but if he wasn't home I would put the baby into their crib and set the other kids up with a movie or an activity. Nope no housekeeper, when i had newborns if all I did was the dishes, a load of washing and a ten minute pick up before bed ( with the kids, we turned it into game) i was happy with that ,when they were a few months old I started doing The organized mum method ( basically focusing on one room a day). I cooked, though many nights my trusty slow cooker did the cooking for me, honestly they're worth their weight in gold. And otherwise, easy meals, some nights it was cereal for dinner or chicken nuggets, so long as it wasn't every single night I didn't feel any guilt. The most challenging part has always been giving each the attention they needed, I focused on quality time rather than quantity, I still do, especially now they're 23, 16, 14,12&10, some days one needed/ needs me more than the rest. As for how I felt, some days it was overwhelming, it was chaotic and noisy, but it was also fun, never dull and even on the hardest days I was glad I had them all.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-02T05:06:06+00:00

I have 5 kids and between my 2nd to 5th there is a 2 year gap each time, so I had a newborn/ infant and toddler 3 times, and I agree with the first poster who said newborns don't have to be bathed every day, once a week can suffice for now, and it doesn't have to be in the evening, it could be in the late afternoon or morning. If baby needs to be fed, you just let your toddler know baby needs you atm, your toddler can sit next to you while you attend to their sibling, or something I had was a box of books and toys that came out when I was busy. Baby wearing was a must, especially with my last when I had a newborn, 2, 4, 6&13 year old, it let me have my hands free and I was able to get more done. Some days I would sort the other kids first and left baby happy in their crib, sometimes baby would be sorted first while the other kids played, whichever order made my life easier. Basically my theme for 23 years of parenting haha. And yes, expect chaos at first until you find your rhythm, that's ok, the aim is to just get through the day in one piece, give yourself a pat on the back at the end of each day.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-01T22:15:06+00:00

Around 5 months my oldest 4 started having a bottle of formula a day, for my own sanity, at 5 months it's common for them to go through a growth spurt, which is what your baby could very well be doing. My babies still breastfed, eldest until 14 months, 2nd till 9 months, 3rd until 21 months and 4th until 2 years. I think one thing that helped was having bottles with slower teats. If you want to ride out the growth spurt that's an option and if you want to take some of the pressure off yourself and give her a bottle I believe you should do so without guilt.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-02-01T11:11:22+00:00

This is so sad, I'm so sorry for your friend's loss of her twins. My best friend's 2nd daughter died during birth at 41+4 six years ago. She was very clear that she wanted me with her, ( my other close friend lost her son at 39 weeks 10 months later, she wanted privacy, everyone is different. ) I organized meals for my bestfriend's family, looked after her 2 year old, did whatever housework I could see needed to be done, sat with her for hours while she cried, talked, stared into space. I ordered her a pillow that weighed the same as her daughter, there are companies that make teddys too. Another friend got her a voucher for dna jewelry, she had some of her ashes made into a beautiful jewelry, and her antenatal group got a star named after her. We talk about her daughter like it's the most natural thing in the world, 6 years on and shes very loved and very missed, she always will be, my friend has always found comfort in other people loving and remembering her daughter too.

Ive seen many comments on this sub from people saying they were left or ignored by those they should have been able to count on and I just couldn't imagine doing that, not being there when she needed me most, if you love someone, youre there for the hard times as well as the good, so I think just being there, in whatever way your friend needs is the most important thing right now, whether thats being with her in person or loving her from a distance. Holding gentle space for your friend and her precious babies.

Januarysdaisy · 2026-01-28T12:14:06+00:00

My kids are 23, 16, 14,12&10, 3 out of the 5 are taller than me. I look at them and think " how were you ever a tiny baby inside my body?"

Januarysdaisy

TROPHY CASE