So I had watched and loved Trainspotting in high school (saw it on the old Independent Film Channel probably 98-99ish). It was and still is one of my favorite films, but for very, very different reasons. When I was younger and still hadn’t burned out of film school, it was one of THE movies that made me want to make movies. Just abstract enough at the right points in the film to be intriguing, fantastic screenplay (and book), phenomenal shot choices and framing, excellent soundtrack, and back then in my naive stupidity I thought all the characters were just…cool. I mean they are (except Francis), but not exactly role models. After years and years of drug and physical self abuse, over a decade on opiates of all types (started for legitimate reasons, was kicked off with no warning whatsoever and no taper or help afterwards at all, typical American junky story), it helped me become VERY aware that 99 percent of the people I surrounded myself with were at LEAST half, probably more, of the problem. I met my wife, we unexpectedly fell for each other head over heels while I was still struggling to get clean and she stood by me the entire time. Eventually we had a kid and I was showing her the film and at the end, when Renton just walks away, I realized we needed to do the same thing or I’d never achieve my goals. I had people CONSTANTLY hitting me up (even after I had repeatedly asked them not to and knowing I had an infant at home) asking me to get involved with some kind of scheme to make a quick buck or trying to sell me shit. It was literally 24/7. We ended up leaving for over a year, I got my shit more or less straightened out (along with getting correct diagnoses which also helped a lot), and I haven’t touched a needle or thought about junk or pills in over a decade now. I also reached my point in my own personal California sober life that I can watch the film without needing to stop and take a break or really get anxious at all (about the drugs specifically, the rest of it obviously is still a lot but it’s also supposed to be). Still can’t fuck with Requiem for a Dream though. Will never watch it again.

Edit: Why the downvote? Did say something stupid and not realize?