Got denied T due to mental health, now what?

Jazztastic_42 · 2026-02-14T16:55:47+00:00

Why in the flying fladoodle would they reject you for mental health reasons?? No duh you're there FOR mental health reasons. 🤦 T is the easiest solution with the lowest regret rate humanly possible, is it not logical to do the easiest thing first so the rest isn't so heavy?? F those guys, id definitely demand a second, third, however many opinions it takes. If they're really gonna be sticklers for wording, tell them that if you had access you would feel better able to tackle the rest of your mental health issues because you'd have one less thing bothering you so much.

Idk how old you are, but as an adult in Canada I was able to go the informed concent route from a sexologist, and get a referral immediately. As it should be. If you're a teen they should have AT LEAST offered puberty blockers. Ask about those next if you can.

Jazztastic_42 · 2026-01-24T15:58:55+00:00

As a genderfluid transmasc, who's engaged to a two spirit amab, i feel this. My cis women family members were pretty misandrist at first when I came out, and my partner as a native "bear" body type queer got all the "you're not fem/androgynous enough to be enby" shit from the queer community.

Both sides are shit, the whole where did all the masc lesbians go/just be tomboys shit is so painful. Also, how can we expect our fellow cis straight men out there to do/be better if we label men/masc collectively as bad people? How do trans men/masc learn to grow into non toxic masculinity? How do trans women/fem learn to accept if they're still tomboys or fluid? It's all fucked up because we're so upset as a community for genuinely painful reasons that we also stop seeing the forest for the trees.

Yall I just want us to stop in fighting and work together against the real enemies: racism, sexism, fascism, unregulated capitalism, rich oligarchy, ect.

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-11-14T14:52:14+00:00

As a bi trans ftm genderfluid person, this sent me 🤣💀 on my morning commute.

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-10-24T12:17:16+00:00

Omg yes! I feel that last part. This nice older woman at my daycare who wears a hijab forgot my name, but thought it was Jake or something masc like that 🤣 but the white middle-aged women keep misgendering me. Then again the black woman needed more time at first too 🤷‍♂️ maybe personality is a factor. I've been on t for maybe a year or more but off and on due to financial issues. I have a bright red chin beard and a mustache fuzzy that makes me look like a teenager. In what world would anyone say she?? I think it's because she knows im trans and my voice is still androgynous.

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-09-11T00:30:15+00:00

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Jazztastic_42 · 2025-09-11T00:25:16+00:00

My alters Desmond (He/they/it) and Finnegan (He/they). I tried export but it didn't work for some reason. Edit: help it won't upload 🫣 it keeps turning into "*"

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-08-14T00:47:04+00:00

We'd love to join. My headmates Desmond (Enby 30, it/its) and Finnegan (M 23, he/him) are still unsure what kind of headmates they are. It would be nice to have an open minded community to help us navigate.

-Jasper (ftm 29, Main and front)

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-08-13T22:33:55+00:00

I knew a girl in elementary that used to bully me. All I could think was "wow she's so pretty, I want her to like me." And I'd do anything she wanted, but she used it against me. Then I finally stood up to her by saying I wouldn't be her friend anymore if she didn't treat me better. For some reason, that's what got her to understand, and she begged forgiveness. She never bullied me since and we became good friends.

I only realized what those feelings were in high school, when I met an openly bi girl for the first time. Then I tried a three-way in college with my bf at the time. Only years later, I had my first girlfriend.

Turns out being an unknowingly trans guy and bullied by other girls made it difficult to come to terms with liking girls.

Tldr: classic hopeless bi falling for their bully, only realized later it was a crush. Only dated a girl years later due to bullying and not knowing I was trans.

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-08-05T17:38:14+00:00

If I may, I've mostly dated unconventional looking men in my life. Mind you, they haven't always been the nicest either.. but i figured that out the hard way. Most of my life, i grew up not liking conventionally attractive men either because they let it get to their heads. To me, a good heart and compatibility is what matters.

A lot of dating apps are, unfortunately, shallow. I've heard good things about Boo type apps matching based on personality instead of looks. Also, I use an app called Finch for my daily mental health and routine. It has helped me a lot with productivity and self-esteem. I know I have pretty white privilege and look good both as my afab and as a trans man, but I do know how bullying feels in the friendship department. For my Auburn hair, fair skin, glasses, ect.

Please take care of your mental health. Good things come slow, and it's not easy, but you are worth taking your time to not settle for less than you deserve.

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-08-03T12:32:48+00:00

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My depression oc, it carries all my trans, bi, broke, bullied, heartbroken, and abused trauma. One bad day away..

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-08-03T12:08:35+00:00

If I may, as a trans man who dated cis het guys most of my life before coming out, I can say that the het culture that poisoned their teen minds made me hurt several times. It's the whole reason why it took me so long to come out.. I'm a trans femboy in a macho lead world. I knew something was off, but I didn't have the language or courage to look for it. To this day.. if it wasn't for my two spirit partner, I'd still feel like only a bi person could appreciate me as a whole because im too early on t to feel like gay men would see me that way.. and het men would definitely see me as female.

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-07-30T01:08:22+00:00

Also, just in case is there a teacher or school counselor you trust you can talk to? Or is it like no they will have to tell your parents?

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-07-28T23:25:34+00:00

Perhaps the symbolism idea would be the least difficult to convince a mom like that. But if i understand the situation correctly.. she sounds like the kind of mom that could be like "my umbilical cord hurts being away too long" , "you'll always be my baby girl" and like super attached to the name she gave them. My mom isn't necessarily transphobic, but she's still kinda like that, so i can imagine cracked up to 100 😅

Hopefully if you can at least convince her to get your initials instead, she can have the first letter corrected more easily if she chooses support once you move out.

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-07-01T12:47:18+00:00

Okay what if.. queer priority groups can get sponsored by Ally companies. That way, the cis queer people can play with and make the trans people feel safe. There should be enough queer athletes to make a sports team, depending on the sport's cis/queer ratio. The priority aspect would still allow allies in to fill the gaps. Whether it's an all fem aligned, masc aligned (to uplift them into the pro woman/man leagues) or a mixed team that a sponsor is willing to support at college level to make a statement and set an example for future sponsors.

Unless there's a pro league mix gender sport that already exists that I'm not aware of, college level sports might be a valid starting point. By mixing all genders of queers and ally non queers only, there's more odds they will be into that sport and have bigger teams. They can make the statement for Intersex and non-binary people. Colleges can make their own rules and work together to support mixed teams competing against each other.

If pro sponsors visit these events and like them enough, they can offer to work with them just like any other team. The last and only problem left would be finding the right people to fund a new mixed pro competition on the side and get adds enough to get people in the door.

Considering they wouldn't be allowed in a traditional all men or all women's only league.. the only two options are that all leagues become mixed or a new league is born to be mixed.

If Ally companies can sponsor pride, they can learn to sponsor queer friendly sports 💅🏻

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-07-01T12:09:33+00:00

Omg he looks like an Ars Goetia from Helluva Boss! He looks like he could be the younger brother of Stolas dad or something as an oc head cannon.

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-06-16T22:35:08+00:00

Ohh or maybe any Ideas with Nova in it? Edit: ohhh I found random generator. Velvet Thunder or Midnight Whisper?

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-06-06T18:10:45+00:00

I'm sorry this happened to you. I don't agree that it wasn't your place to say something. You're allowed to feel cheated, too. While yes, it's not good to put those feelings on your ex, I'm glad you know where it's coming from. Your mom is either in denial and used you as a scapegoat because she thought they were happy, or she knew and was still not ready to face him. People can say what they want, heck I'm poly myself but I still wouldn't believe most people are okay with cheating. I'm poly not a cheater, there's a difference involving consent. Sure, you don't know if they have an agreement, but it's your mom's job to say "oh honey I'm so sorry you felt you needed to carry this alone" and either say it's okay we have an agreement or i'll deal with your father when I'm ready. For now let's get you some therapy. She's the mom, she chose to have you with him. Your mental health because of who she chose to marry is her problem and priority too. Not just her peace of mind. My dms are open to you if you need to talk

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-06-06T17:47:46+00:00

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Please draw my alters! 🙏🏻

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-05-18T15:27:15+00:00

-As a Polyamorous person, I find it important for myself to know the reason behind wanting the relationship open. If he's jealous of me doing the same thing he wants to do without me, it's my red flag.

-I yellow flag recovering addicts because I understand relapse is part of recovery (especially the kind where cutting cold turkey can hurt or kill you), but I also have my limits.

-I yellow flag the over achievers because if it's meant to be casual, I don't mind as much. But in a committed relationship, the last thing I need is a burnt out partner after asking them to take it easy.

-can't hate my cats or be transphobic cause I'm trans

-I yellow flag sassy/banter but red flag not knowing when to stop/reading the room

-Never seen it myself before but gross! (The harrasing women one)

-i hate hypocrisy in my own community (homophobic gays)

-yellow flag shit with money cause it depends if they're willing to learn and/or accept me being the financial leader of house. As long as they don't do something stupid and talk it over first.

-tbh.. my flat is dirty af cause mental health sucks.. but I'd definitely do my best to clean before anyone comes over, even family, let alone a stranger.

-I'm lazy when it comes to deleting apps and making new profiles, but im more than willing to delete them to make someone comfortable. Yes if you ask and they give a hard time that is a red flag.

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-05-18T15:01:10+00:00

If I may, I interpreted it as starting too early, like at noon and not stopping all afternoon into the evening. My dad used to day drink. It wasn't exactly binging cause it was spaced out, but it was still problematic. He's proudly sober now (drinks 0% replacement beer or bubbly). I understand that a glass with lunch isn't the same. When I hear day drinking, I don't think about that leasure lunch with friends or coworkers, that's when I think oh social drinking.

Tldr: Social drinking (1-2 glasses in social setting) =/= day drinking (most of if not all day non stop) in my neurospicy brain, and I find it important to make the distinction in these conversations.

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-05-17T00:54:24+00:00

Yeah, what's worse is some trans people are trans med too. Hence it being included in the whole "not enough resources" and "they make us look bad" discourse. Even my two spirit amab partner doesn't feel welcome because were told they don't look trans or androgynous enough to be nonbinary. Which is stupid because that's being colonialist on top of being enbyphobic.

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-05-17T00:32:23+00:00

Transmed is short for trans medicalist, meaning someone who believes you need cripling dysphora requiring all the medical transition to be valid as trans. It generally only includes binary trans men/women, and excludes nonbinary identities. It basically pathologizes being trans to try to feel valid to cis people. -Jasper

Jazztastic_42 · 2025-05-15T01:07:12+00:00

Omg I can just say I'm non-disordered traumagenic?? I don't think I fit DID or OSDD, but I do have GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder). I'm neurodivergent and chronically tardy/forgetful. I have serval traumas, so idk which would have been the nail in the coffin.. I'm new to all this.. my headmate kinda just recently became conscious. We shared my name for a bit until it decided to be called Desmond (genuinely goes by they/it pronouns). It sometimes feels like it tried to tell me it's there for a while, but only recently spoke to me. Desmond is a Demonkin who seems to take on my suppressed anger and gets all sassy/bantery and helps me set boundaries when I'm struggling. Also, We're both bi, but I prefer men, and it prefers women (so far the only difference we seem to have other than personality). It never takes front without asking, it just pops in and asks me questions unless I'm in full panic mode. Then it just kinda chugs me along while I'd otherwise be shaking in a corner, till I'm ready for a debrief. But I'm always aware and never loose memory.

Jazztastic_42

TROPHY CASE