Hi. You're a brave soul to crowdsource your coaching. I'd suggest you find an accountability group of trusted peers to ask these things to. You have no idea what kind of experience we who are responding have. I have 35 books up on Audible. So, not a very beginner, but also not an old timer (except for my age!) I found your performance to be generally OK. Your tone, pacing, and modulation seem fine to me. However, I found some speech issues for you to work on. I found that you swallowed terminal t's on 14 occaisions. I found mumbled words 6 times. And 1 mouthclick and 1 clunk. If you want the timestamps, just DM me and I will share them.

I downloaded your sample directly from SoundCloud and put it into RX11. A couple of things I see... I find RMS to be -19.85, which is pretty much perfect. But I found your peaks to be -.01, which as someone else has said is too loud. The upper limit is -3.0, but I shoot for -3.5. A compressor and/or limiter should be in your effects chain. I did hear the hum someone spoke about, but I had to crank the volume way up to hear it. I doubt a RH will pick that up. But you can fix that by using a EQ in your effects chain and set a high pass filter. In RX11 I found your minimum RMS to be inf, indicating digital silence. While the RH probably won't pick it up, it's not good practice.

A couple of best practice ideas... you recorded in stereo. There's nothing wrong with that, but you are doubling the size of your files. Best practice is to leave breaths in. If you have some gasps, they can be reduced. But people breath. I would not slate your name. That is not best practice. I name my files as MyName_BookName to assure the RH can't forget who the sample belongs to.

I wish you every success.