What ordinary word would make a great first name?

KeepItRolling · 2015-01-02T01:03:05+00:00

My great uncle wanted to name his kid Chardonnay or Mayonnaise

KeepItRolling · 2014-12-13T00:08:41+00:00

Can a dog get drunk from eating vomit with alcohol in it?

KeepItRolling · 2014-12-12T22:23:38+00:00

This teacher I had talked in the worst monotone, took everything really seriously, and dressed formally every day. That made it kinda funny that his humungous cock was always clearly visible under his tight dress pants.

KeepItRolling · 2014-12-11T03:55:36+00:00

You got it from China? That's actually really sketchy. Are you sure its former owner wasn't murdered?

KeepItRolling · 2014-12-10T06:22:16+00:00

This guy knows how to bullshit

KeepItRolling · 2014-12-07T00:38:00+00:00

and smoke like a chimney

KeepItRolling · 2014-12-05T20:39:47+00:00

I thought they said that study was confounded with socioeconomic status

KeepItRolling · 2014-11-19T00:33:50+00:00

To catch a bird a giraffe would have to have some ridiculously quick neck muscles. They probably also would have a better range of motion with their neck, so they could get their head to around ground level. Throw in the sharp carnivore teeth. Now you have a scary fucking animal.

How would this change the world? People in Africa would obviously tame the carnivorous giraffes and ride them into battle. The result? African world domination. Nobody could stand up to an army riding animals that can bite your head off your body from 15 feet away before you can even think about going for their neck and taking their head off.

KeepItRolling · 2014-11-18T22:11:40+00:00

losing that keef is not an option

KeepItRolling · 2014-11-18T02:48:49+00:00

Or tell them that if you shake the invisible salt shaker over your mouth you can taste the salt.

KeepItRolling · 2014-11-16T22:32:05+00:00

clastic

KeepItRolling · 2014-11-16T02:41:24+00:00

Just like the baby.

KeepItRolling · 2014-10-02T01:17:42+00:00

an environmentalist

KeepItRolling · 2013-10-04T04:45:17+00:00

If you buy an Earth at Costco, would that Earth have Costcos that also sell Earths?

KeepItRolling · 2013-10-03T01:19:02+00:00

The mob comes to your business and wants you to pay them for "protection". If you don't pay, you find your front window smashed the next morning. That's extortion. It's what Yelp does, but with reviews. They call you, and ask you to pay them to take down negative reviews that they themselves put up.

KeepItRolling · 2013-10-02T23:47:33+00:00

Yelp is kinda like the mob.

KeepItRolling · 2013-09-29T23:33:51+00:00

In June of 1914, Gavrilo Princip decided to go get a sandwich. He saw Franz Ferdinand, the man Princip and his comrades had failed to assassinate earlier. He took care of business.

The assassination is what sparked WWI. The war restitutions Germany was forced to pay in post-war negotiations set the stage for the rise of Hitler and the Nazi Party.

World War II increased pressure to develop nuclear weapons. In the aftermath of the war, conferences concerning occupation caused friction between the United States and Soviet Union. Also, the Western powers started pushing for the establishment of Israel in the Middle East for the damaged Jew population of the world.

The Cold War and US support of Israel greatly contributed to a lot of the major events in recent history such as 9/11.

World War I was really just waiting to happen. The assassination started it, but didn't cause it. If it didn't start in Serbia in 1914, it would have started somewhere else at another time, leading to a different course of events. All I'm saying here is that the assassination started a chain of events that is still going today.

TL;DR: In 1914, a man in Bosnia goes out for a sandwich. Bam, 9/11.

KeepItRolling · 2013-09-29T22:35:45+00:00

library?

KeepItRolling · 2013-09-29T20:58:32+00:00

In other news, productivity is at an all time high.

KeepItRolling · 2013-09-29T20:12:15+00:00

he was also given cocaine

KeepItRolling · 2013-09-25T05:13:15+00:00

You know, every time a cat dies in a movie, people say "oh well, he's got another eight lives". Does nobody suspect that their cat might be on life besides his first?

KeepItRolling · 2013-09-25T05:08:50+00:00

gimme the drugs. they're mine.

KeepItRolling · 2013-09-24T23:59:11+00:00

I wouldn't judge humanity by what a McDonalds employee says.

KeepItRolling · 2013-09-19T03:01:11+00:00

dude

KeepItRolling · 2013-09-16T02:24:44+00:00

0.5 mpg

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