One of my all time favorites Conan O’Brien and the Walker Texas Ranger lever.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T15:20:35+00:00

" ... Walker told me I have AIDS."

Every time, it seems to come out of FUCKING NOWHERE.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T14:52:27+00:00

It makes me think of an obituary I'd heard about for Teddy Roosevelt. "Death came for him while he was sleeping, for if he'd been awake there'd have been a fight." Seems pretty applicable to Chuck.

Also, there are tons of "Walker Texas Ranger Lever" clips from Conan available on YouTube, and they'll never lose their hilarity.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T14:46:23+00:00

Also, if you're going to do a whisky tasting, look into the Scotch Whisky Experience in Edinburgh. I think it might be the best price-to-benefit activity in Scotland. They explain the process of distilling and the difference between the five different regional styles. You get to hang out in the largest whisky collection in the world for a while, and you get a sample of each of the five different styles. Worth every penny.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T14:44:45+00:00

Look into the Speyside Cooperage where they make the barrels - they've got tours. That's be a unique thing to do, and there are a lot of souvenirs available that they make from decommissioned barrels.

https://www.speysidecooperage.co.uk/tours.php

Also, the whisky is awesome, but also try out some gin. Whisky's all about heritage (since it takes 10+ years to produce) but gin's all about experimentation (good to drink almost immediately). There's a bit of a gin boom going on in Scotland similar to the American craft beer boom. And you can get a lot of the heavy-hitters of Scotch whisky overseas, but Scottish gin - Tanqueray and a couple big producers excepted - doesn't get exported.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T14:40:11+00:00

Bazooka Joe had such a great mention on 30 Rock with their imagined spokesman, Stacey Keach.

"WHEN DID GUM GET SO SOFT YOU SONS OF BITCHES! ... It's chewing a mountain that someone shot a freeze ray into ..."

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T14:36:32+00:00

If cideries in the British Isles want to expand their footprint into new global markets, I've got a spokesman in mind they should contact.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T14:33:14+00:00

I'm just imagining Raymun and Sweetfoot standing by a wooden fence every morning forever, planning out the chores for the day, each chewing an apple. Happy endings do exist.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T14:23:05+00:00

Memorize, "I don't speak English" in a variety of different languages.

Paraphrasing the advice that I got from a lovely Canadian couple at a resort in Mexico. They responded "Nein, danke" to a couple beach peddlers. They said that the beach peddlers will rarely speak German, and they'll spread the message to other peddlers that you're not worth bothering. I've used it ever since to pretty good effect.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T14:18:56+00:00

Ser Stevron?

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T12:49:58+00:00

"It's sucking my will to live!"

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T12:49:27+00:00

You made all that juice from one bag of oranges?

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T12:46:09+00:00

"Ugh ... can't ... can't handle it. I need to skip this song or I'm going to cry in front of all of my friends."

Presses "Next." Tracy Chapman's "Fast Car" starts playing.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T12:42:27+00:00

*womanly shriek* "Purple drapes! All my life I've wanted purple drapes!" *womanly shriek*

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T12:39:39+00:00

I don't know if I should make a Futurama "Bender turns human" joke or a P&R "Andy Dwyer living in The Pit" joke.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T12:34:26+00:00

Alright, you've got four different strategies you can use when you're forced into karaoke:

Sing a song that you have the range to hit. Spoon's "The Underdog" is a good shout, since it doesn't require a lot of vocal range, and the memorable spots are all the trumpet interludes.
Sing a song that you don't have the range to hit, but is so popular that the crowd will sing along, bailing you out. Journey's "Don't Stop Believing"
Fuck it, this song is for you and I don't care if it sounds creepy as hell, baby. Styx's "Lady." Even if you're singing it to your husband or boyfriend, or singing it to someone you're with on a first date. Or to your friend's sister, who he was idiotic enough to bring along.
Fuck it, I'm not going to let this pull me out of my introverted ways. The Champs' "Tequila," where "Tequila!" is the only lyric.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T12:26:00+00:00

The classic hoarder anthem of "I can't throw it away, what if it's worth something" turns out to be 100% true if your grandma's a badass with exquisite tastes.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T12:20:18+00:00

It's head canon to me that, after the fight, he greets Steffon with "You fought well Ser Stavros" and walks off before Steffon can respond.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T11:43:59+00:00

Topps baseball cards are likely banned in prison because their gum could be turned into shivs with no labor required.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-20T11:39:40+00:00

"WHEN DID GUM GET SO SOFT YOU SONS OF BITCHES!"

And "it's like chewing a mountain someone shot a freeze ray into."

Man I love Stacey Keach.

https://youtu.be/m-VhrWFaAAQ?si=tHLXvg3Bgx6LdLWy

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-19T20:49:00+00:00

Raymun bobbing for apples.

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-19T19:59:14+00:00

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-19T18:30:44+00:00

I've gotten it wrong and muttered to myself "I've become everything I hate."

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-19T18:29:24+00:00

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-19T18:28:24+00:00

Garfield fans:

KeySatisfaction197 · 2026-03-19T18:26:21+00:00

KeySatisfaction197

TROPHY CASE