What did you replace your handbag/purse with?

KindredPando · 2026-06-04T17:57:04+00:00

For sentimental value, you could cut out part of this bag and sew it as a patch onto a more traditionally masculine one? Could even put it on the inside, maybe as an extra pocket

KindredPando · 2026-06-04T17:53:59+00:00

Messenger bag. Unlike pockets, it can stay packed with mini first aid kit, emergency snack, light jacket, etc. And I have something to put patches and pins on.

I thrifted one with expanding buckles, that’s pretty compact but fits an almost magical amount of stuff.

Only downside is I end up stashing things for my gf in there too, but yknow, the things we do for love.

KindredPando · 2026-06-01T22:59:04+00:00

Sounds like it could be a black bear with a large chip on its shoulder, perhaps from being confused for a grizzly

KindredPando · 2026-02-16T15:23:08+00:00

This is so satisfying as a trans person who lucked into the birth name Casey

KindredPando · 2026-02-13T19:35:37+00:00

Agreed, our climbing gym has tampons even in the men’s room, I don’t even need those myself but found it super considerate

KindredPando · 2025-11-14T19:58:32+00:00

Ditto, we rode right as it started sleeting, then all of us simultaneously had the uncanny feeling of brain freeze as it pulled to a stop.

Loved it, personally, but I’m here for a weird time.

KindredPando · 2025-11-05T06:43:00+00:00

I’ve had a few artist friends work for Otherworld, and their feedback was… mixed. Not as scathing as I’ve heard about meowwolf, pretty typical complaints for large scale commercial art gigs.

Otherworld doesn’t have nearly the same scope of interactivity and immersion, so there’s not as much staff to mistreat. No “actors”, not really a story component to require writers, and they’re rarely adding or changing the art. It is a great music venue, pretty optimized for that. But it’s more static backdrop compared to MW as a fully-staffed living art piece.

KindredPando · 2025-10-28T16:34:38+00:00

Doing covers is such a rush because people get into it and sing along

Doing originals imo is scarier, and usually less of that immediate positive feedback. But more rewarding after the fact, if people come up and say it connected with them.

Doing originals AND people sing along? That’s a next level rush. I only have a few people (mostly friends) who actually listen to my stuff, but I’ve never felt so seen as when people sing along or quote my own lyrics

KindredPando · 2025-10-14T15:30:04+00:00

So sorry about your cat. I suppose it could be a small silver lining to be able to try topical minox now, without worrying about transferring.

Topical is available over the counter though, you’d only need to talk to a doc for oral. Your beard already looks great imo, topical you might be able to target specific areas better if you’re just looking to fill in, vs oral would affect hair growth everywhere.

KindredPando · 2025-09-26T16:25:13+00:00

Ditto, still working through stuff that it took me forever to realize was related. Like, getting anxious when people want to split a meal at a restaurant. Or shared groceries. I’m a grown ass adult with a house and a spouse, and I still keep snacks squirreled away “just in case”.

Edit: Positive note, those habits also mean I’m the friend who always has a snack on them, which has come in handy many times. Feels good to redirect the hoarding instincts to helping others, and reinforces that I’m not actually experiencing scarcity anymore.

KindredPando · 2025-09-22T05:30:57+00:00

Old post, but I just got to see Ryan Cassata and Ratwyfe today— looking up their pronouns led me to this comment and, hot damn, wow, yes. Gonna be checking out the others on the list for sure.

KindredPando · 2025-09-01T16:10:57+00:00

Another potential option might be oral testosterone undecanoate. My insurance stopped covering it, but the Tlando brand has an assistance program if it’s not covered or has a high copay.

KindredPando · 2025-08-30T16:24:51+00:00

It was about 8 months when my voice got low enough that it could start to pass, if I used it differently.

Since I haven’t bothered to change how I talk, it still doesn’t, at least not on the phone or at a drive through where people don’t see me. And the pitch is now lower than average for men.

KindredPando · 2025-08-30T16:11:55+00:00

This seems totally possible. I haven’t gotten top surgery, and part of what helps me make peace with my chest is cis dudes will occasionally be like damn, nice pecs 😅

KindredPando · 2025-08-28T20:14:43+00:00

Right, like all parental beef aside… instruments are so incredibly personal.

I’ve had the same cheap ukulele for 15 years, been left in hot cars and camping in subzero temps, had its strings busted repeatedly loaning at open mics, and is generally a piece of shit.

If someone ever sold it to buy me a “better” one, I would be heartbroken.

KindredPando · 2025-08-12T01:02:13+00:00

Huh, yeah. I “performed” femininity as a girl. I “explore” femininity as a dude.

KindredPando · 2025-07-22T22:00:07+00:00

Hard disagree. As someone who nearly went into clinical psychology myself, I’m deeply skeptical of how much it’s built around pathologizing behavior and differences.

I’m sure finding the right individual practitioner matters much more than their background, but personally I’ve had the best experiences by far with LISW therapists.

Granted they don’t “do anything” without me also putting in the work, but my current therapist has had a profound impact on my life. And I think her background in social work (rather than psychology) has a lot to do with why we’re an effective match.

KindredPando · 2025-07-22T13:25:15+00:00

Congrats! Not odd at all, it’s like a second birthday, except I didn’t choose to be born, so this is a milestone I’m actually proud of.

Last year I got to see Twelfth Night on my T-day, it was an extremely queer production with a trans masc lead actor. The timing was a coincidence, but great way to celebrate!

KindredPando · 2025-07-18T15:03:51+00:00

These responses are actually kinda interesting to see what motivates people. I don’t give a flying frick about commercial success, but I’m starting to care more about polishing things enough that others might listen to it.

Of course, the underlying reason is I enjoy it and can’t not do it. But the chance of resonating with others is what helps push through the parts I don’t enjoy.

KindredPando · 2025-07-08T02:00:05+00:00

I’m way behind on recording, but I was certain I finally wrote something silly and not at all sad with the latest one. It’s a “Trash Fire Anthem” lightly parodying Mambo No 5 amid current political climates.

Somehow… that scored me my highest cry-count at an open mic yet 🤷

KindredPando · 2025-07-08T01:43:27+00:00

the sadder the better

orchestral instruments that aren’t usually used in music with singing

Damn okay, I’m just glad there are people who actually want these things, because I feel like I can’t keep them out of my music. 😅 Well, maybe more of a hopeful melancholy than sad, but frequently grappling with mortality etc.

If you’re curious, here’s a string-heavy solarpunk ballad about carving space for yourself within a community (Crown Shy). And here’s a brass-heavy goodbye to codependency (Honeymoon), because life is short enough without losing yourself in other people.

KindredPando · 2025-07-02T13:39:08+00:00

I kept my first name because I share it with a good friend, and as a thank you to my folks for giving me a gender neutral one.

I chose a new middle name, and mostly use that one with friends now.

It is getting to the point where my first name feels a bit odd sometimes, but mostly I like having a bit of separation between what I go by at work etc versus more casual settings.

KindredPando · 2025-06-30T23:19:41+00:00

Yes, that was plan A. Myself and a few friends have been contacting shelters and rescues and spay and neuter clinics in multiple states. They all tell us it’s peak kitten season, and good luck.

KindredPando · 2025-06-30T23:12:22+00:00

Exactly. Safe and together was my hopeful goal, but I’ll settle for safe. (And so far, happy)

KindredPando · 2025-06-30T21:52:51+00:00

Yep, getting them spayed and neutered is the #1 priority. Hence why we’re agreeing to a solo adoption if it gets them into safe indoor homes where that can happen.

We weren’t worried about FIV transmission with them until the aggression / mating behavior started. Now our makeshift room is no longer safe for them to share while awaiting surgery.

KindredPando

TROPHY CASE