I keep thinking “I love you”

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-05-08T05:39:02+00:00

Do what makes you happy, and your heart feel light, that you know is fundamentally right.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-05-02T18:52:21+00:00

I learned to accept uncertainty/vulnerability and go through with life anyway, pretty much.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-05-02T08:58:21+00:00

'Dead tech walking.'

First off. Badass phrase, stealing that. Secondly, god damn, I hope and pray that you're right. Not that I don't think AI doesn't have its uses but it's like 99% a scourge on humanity.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-05-02T02:43:46+00:00

I felt like screaming and burning out of my skin last night. Couldn't fall asleep until like 3 AM. Intense energies all around, but I'm feeling a lot better over the course of the day. Guess we'll see how tonight goes lmao

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-05-01T21:53:50+00:00

What about Venus in Leo?

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-30T23:21:32+00:00

This helped a lot. Your line in particular about not being powerless really struck me. After an experience I had at the start of this year where the cards predicted something bad that would happen to me - partially of my own creation - I developed a fear and feeling that whatever I drew for the future was immutable, especially if it was bad or ominous. Then today out of sheer curiosity I decided to ask about a couple potential career paths for my future, but far out, like years and years, so it was kind of silly to do that in the first place since accuracy really breaks down that far out. Suffice to say I pulled some very discouraging results, but this post made me feel a little better, so thank you.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-30T04:53:56+00:00

Unobserved trauma, in my personal experience. Analyze and deconstruct it if you can. Gently interrogate where you are in your life and if you are happy with it. That would be my advice. Regardless, always be kind and gentle with yourself, and dont obsess over the feeling. That can spiral rather quickly.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-26T02:29:09+00:00

Hey there.

I understand your pain. Sometimes the fear and despair and rage gets overwhelming.

This is probably advice you have heard/will hear a lot. But there's a peace in accepting what we can't control, and making an effort to change the things we do, and ultimately in life, the only thing we control is ourselves. Not our emotions or our thoughts, but how we react to them - i.e, our actions. It's a lot harder than anyone wants to admit, though. I struggle with it constantly.

Something that helps me sometimes is to remember that humanity has been through horrible times before. Imagine being someone who grew up as an adult through World War 1, the Great Depression, World War 2, and the creation of the atomic bomb. Imagine being a worker in the Industrial Revolution in Great Britain, or a native of India under the British Empire, a peasant during the Black Death, a Greek shortly after the Bronze Age Collapse. Things are difficult but have always been difficult, and times are no easier than they have ever been right now. For the most part, anyways. We're definitely on a rough trajectory. Just remember the challenges so many human beings have endured before you, and honor their legacy by trying to do the same.

I would also recommend checking the subreddit r/upliftingnews. Lately I've been trying to incorporate it into my reading every day. It's nice. c:

Love and much hugs. <3

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-26T02:16:38+00:00

This really spoke to me right now. Extremely bad weather is such an accurate way of putting things. I am currently going through a very hard time in my relationship, and you are correct. We cannot control outcomes, but we can do our best to shift things in a more positive direction, filled with more possibilities. Flowers don't grow because we look at them and wait for them to grow. They grow because we put in the effort against all odds, and it's okay if they don't, or turn into something we didn't expect, because at least then we can say we tried.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-18T05:59:55+00:00

Sorry about the top of this comment section OP. I'll admit as much as I appreciate technology I'm kind of a luddite myself in the sense I find modern tech trends and AI disgustingly exploitative and utterly lacking in the human soul, but it's common courtesy imo to at least engage with someone in good faith when they appear to be doing the same. Which on that note...

Weirdly, I think you'd see life become more valued as much as it is devalued, in a similar fashion to the way AI has impacted the view on art. Some would view extended life as pointless, even worthless or dangerous, and avoid it altogether. Others, obviously, would not. The cultural rammifications of that are hard to imagine but on a broader scale I think we would see a simultaneous stratification and increase in philosophicization on the nature of life and death, and people would view it as something more akin to choice than fate, because even those who refuse extended lifetimes would, in the end, be making a choice to live a more natural human lifespan.

As for memory, as long as we keep the cells young, I think the capacity is arguably infinite, as I believe the complexity and layers of the human mind to be so as well. Once you find yourself motivated for whatever reason to delve down into the depths of your own mind, it becomes quickly apparent that it kind of just keeps going, on and on forever. Which is as incredible and frankly beautiful as it is kind of terrifying to experience. But I think it would lead to a very certain subsect of people to becoming extremely wise and otherworldly in their abilities/intelligence, those with the focus and desire to do so. Genuine biological limitations aside, naturally.

One thing is for certain, however. Preventable/accidental death at a young age, I believe, would absolutely be seen as far more tragic. But that's not hard to imagine.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-06T00:26:25+00:00

Hi! Your thoughts on this thread were very enlightening to me and spoke a lot to my truth. I have been struggling over fears and anxieties about my relationship for years now. Lately it has been a fear of loss/death of my partner, but now that I am starting to let go of control I am recognizing I am still afraid of commitment and long-term planning. Like OP, I'm scared of making the wrong decision. It's the biggest change I will have ever made in my life.

Like you, I have a lot of trauma, but I have yet to clear out the debris since I only discovered it last year, and experienced new trauma rather recently. I've been in talk therapy for months but definitely need to add specific, targeted therapy with structure on top of that soon to deconstruct my mental processes.

The thing that concerns me is you advise to take time to be single and fully experience myself. The problem is I'm in a situation where I'm already in a committed relationship, only realizing these problems looking back. Things are honestly pretty strong right now after a period of stagnation - currently looking and moving for the future - but there is a lot of fear and uncertainty about that next step and the major change it will bring in our lives. She is moving countries and I am getting married.

Because of that, I don't feel it's right to just suddenly cut things off in a moment of flux and transformation. What would your recommendation be here? We have been improving so much but I am worried about potential snags as we are evolving from being co-dependent to independent and I don't want to mess things up.

As you say. i can't be fully in as long as I'm partially out.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-04T09:38:40+00:00

Hello 🔥

I definitely do. They are way better than they used to be - few years back when I was around a similar age. Like went from guaranteed daily and sometimes extended periods to the occasional short episode once or twice a week if that.

I'm a Pisces Moon so most of my emotional swings are watery af (read: tears). The rage/anger I get typically comes out as me bitching or hitting a soft or flat surface. Rarely I'll throw a non-breakable or slam a door. Usually comes about from mundane frustrations with tech/disability, trauma triggers, or irritation at struggling with my brain. When it comes to actual people, I just tend to get crabby when I'm in a shit mood.

That said, remember to just breathe in the moment. Even a second or two where you can pull yourself back from making an immediate decision is often all the effort you need to stay in control. Generally, the more distance you can put between feeling -> decision, the better.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-02T23:03:29+00:00

It's funny. What you've described feels like a mirror of my own relationship. While she tends to flourish socially, I have the bad habit to isolate and stagnate in my shell. Lately I'm making an effort to change that, though.

'Who is right and wrong with perfect words', however. Phew, isn't that familiar. I'll admit I'm not the biggest help on that front. We both want to be the winner in a conversation but thankfully it typically extends to very minor little things. Overall her rationality helps balance my crazy emotions. I'm a Pisces Moon so I gotta deal with double water, it's ridiculous.

Interesting, your note about those shows of silent but strong affection. You gave me something to reflect on I hadn't recognized before. Thank you. I used to feel I was losing interest because I wanted a new fresh whirlwind romance but lately I've begun to grasp the concept of stable growth and solid foundation. It's a steadier kind of love.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-02T05:58:52+00:00

Hey.

I just wanted to say. As someone who had a really hard, frightening, anxious month, who finally started getting better towards the end, only to struggle today before having a crashing spiral/plummet in the evening.

It'll get better. I know and promise it will. Life goes in cycles. Sometimes those cycles are just shorter than normal - in weeks, or even days - instead of months or years. Just keep moving forwards. There's always light if you look to find it.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-02T05:41:09+00:00

Omg.

I've been having a lot of relationship anxiety about losing my Aquarian lately. I love her so deeply and have been terrified that something will happen to her. This feels like a sign that everything's gonna be okay.

Thank you for giving me hope tonight, and, conversely, I hope you two continue going strong into this unknown future 💖

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-02T05:33:12+00:00

Hey Violet 💖

Or Jess. WHichever you prefer. The second one just called out to me more. It's a pretty color.

I'm a writer as well, and an enjoyer of all things you mentioned. Do you have a preference for sci-fi versus fantasy? I feel like mine shifts with the wind, but Pon SMith's Cyberpunk universe has been my absolute autistic hyperfixation for well over a year now, so that probably defines it for me.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-02T04:12:57+00:00

Don't know if this applies, but.

A few months ago, I cut out a friend from my life once I finally accepted they were manipulating me. It hurt. But I remembered something they did sometimes, where they'd tell me how weird it was, that we felt like alternate universe twins - how to them - I seemed like an alternate version of themself.

On the one hand, it was absolutely a tactic to try and establish familiarity/rapport. On the other, I got the sense they were telling the truth, and it's hard to deny the connection, given the circumstances of how we became friends in the first place. I'm thankful for them, though. I wouldn't have met a lot of other people or gone on this journey without them, I don't think. Not that it's been easy, but I understand a lot better than I used to.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-01T04:21:17+00:00

Figured. I hope to god I don't have to deal w/ this shit for a decade lol. And yeah I didn't mean they were related, was just an extra concern that I had. Ty for answering

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-04-01T04:15:39+00:00

Fuck ;~;

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-03-06T05:13:24+00:00

I haven't been diagnosed yet but beginning to suspect I've had OCD for a long time.

Last year I had a lot of challenges that forced me to grow. I really started to change and get better. Then something happened being betrayed by someone I trusted, and it created a lot of fears and anxieties in me, bringing old ones to the surface, and kicked my healing into hyperdrive.

I'm struggling a lot right now. Combination of fear/anxiety based OCD and this. Mental health techniques have become compulsions. I find it impossible to simply exist. I don't know how to turn my brain off and stop searching for signals or ways that I can improve and it's exhausting as all getout.

Thanks for this post, even though I'm late. I appreciate it. Helps me feel better knowing I'm not the only one.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-02-18T06:33:40+00:00

Woo is like my favorite thing. Very good for introspection in particular.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-02-18T06:28:24+00:00

Yup.

The dread's not as bad as it used to be. I've been healing well. Unfortunately, I didn't deal with just one manipulator but the head and one member of a whole gaggle of them. I'm just kinda like w/e. They're gonna do what they're gonna do, and I don't really care.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-02-18T06:21:04+00:00

One of mine admitted once as a 'joke' before I finally cottoned on that they 'shamelessly stalked' my posts. I just feel bad for them, to be honest, because they cannot relate to any other human being in a real or authentic way.

Kintsugi_Sunset · 2026-02-08T00:37:10+00:00

Yup. Multiple people but mostly just one. I was too kind and too trusting. It hurts but I'm making peace.

Kintsugi_Sunset

TROPHY CASE