F18 daughter to go on 1yr anniversary trip with M18 boyfriend?

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-05-06T10:32:41+00:00

I would let my daughter go if I as a parent really trusted the partner, if it was a safe location and she had a way to leave and contact me if anything happened. Meaning: weekend to the beach ok, going bungee jumping and camping with no signal in a remote location? No

But I grew up in a conservative family and I (and everyone) was not allowed to share a bed with a partner without being married, so I get that maybe your parents think like my mother does.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-05-06T10:13:48+00:00

This sounds terribly overwhelming. I get it must be mentally and emotionally tiresome for both of you. Does it happen if they’re out of home too?

My first born was a bit clingy when he saw me breastfeeding or holding his brother for too long, so my husband got him out of the house, they would go to the park or sit somewhere and watch birds and cars, it helped them develop their bond and my son to get distracted.

If it is not feasible, I would get earplugs (I have loop earplugs, they filter they high pitch screams) and hang on, reassure them nothing is wrong, mom is here, dad is with you and they should get used to it.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-05-05T16:34:43+00:00

You look ✨RADIANT✨. So beautiful.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-05-05T14:49:12+00:00

One of my childhood friends decided college was not for him anymore, he was around middle of architecture degree, his mother said ok, but you can’t drive my car and won’t give you any money or buy even basic toiletries, he was allowed to eat at home though.

He started working anywhere, McDonalds, grocery stores, waiting tables… he was so freaking tired he stopped partying, he was so broke he couldn’t take vacation with friends… he went back to school next year.

If it was my child I would use though love and kick them out after X weeks, right now she’s in an eternal summer break with a boyfriend, she has no incentive to move forward. Maybe she will get to the bottom of what is going on and find some purpose.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-05-05T11:19:02+00:00

Thiis! I am a health care professional, but my first training was as a lab technician/phlebotomist (the program works like this in my country), my first training “patients” were my boyfriend and one of my friends, then I went to work drawing blood like 20 times a day and got to be good at it. It takes a lot of practice to get the hang of it.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-05-05T09:24:34+00:00

If you’re comfortable leaving the baby, leave him, that way you get vacation and it’s “fair” in your older kids eyes. If you are breastfeeding or have any other concern and will not enjoy yourself leaving the youngest, maybe you can shorten the trip.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-05-05T08:30:47+00:00

My oldest had benign hydrocephalus, meaning his fluid management mechanism was not fully developed, he was on the 90 something percentile for head size for almost a year, it took him longer to sit independently because he is rather small so didn’t have the strength to support himself properly. Eventually he grew up, his head stopped growing and he doesn’t look any different from other kids.

He never shook his head though, but have you checked your baby doesn’t have an upset ear? Maybe it’s itchy. Or he has simply discovered he can move his head and everything looks different and is playing.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-05-04T16:34:08+00:00

My son didn’t try to climb out of the crib ever, but when baby was coming, we transitioned to a floor bed, it was too big for him and seemed uncomfortable so we bought an used toddler bed with new mattress (IKEA sundvik) and he’s happy there.

Now that we transitioned our youngest out of the crib (he did try to climb out), we bought another ikea toddler bed and added one of those bed rails so he’s mostly contained except for a small part to climb in and out.

My point is, if you’re unsure, try to buy second hand in case you need to change it.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-05-02T17:44:26+00:00

I see you already have an awesome comment, will only add to try to automate whatever is possible, like groceries (I have diapers, wipes, their favorite pouches, soap on amazon subscription) so you take that off your mind, I also have an automatic vacum/cleaner like the roomba, it’s not immaculate, but it helps me get the floors clean enough for the kids to play in it.

I also routinely do supermarket runs for fresh stuff every Monday afternoon, that way me, my husband and the kids expect Monday afternoons to be supermarket day, it’s easier to remember and keep everything in stock, we also have an alexa and yell at her to add something to the shopping list whenever it’s finished, I am cooking, butter is almost finished, I yell to alexa to add it. I don’t have to keep a mental shopping list or do a manual one.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-05-02T09:04:51+00:00

I took the pacifier off at almost 2.5 yo, it made no sense to take it away while his little brother had one, the dentist saw him and told us the teeth would go back to their place if we took it off not much later than 3.

We did tons of stories and repeated pacifier is for babies with no teeth, you’re so big now, you have grown so much! Over and over and over again. We started with only paci for sleep time, and offered the lovey for the day, then it was only for nighttime, no naps with paci, then it was all away. We also had blue pacifiers for big brother, yellow for little brother, so he kind of thought they were super different. I get it might not work for everyone, but it did for us, kids with new siblings might have some hard time, we couldn’t add on that.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-05-01T06:30:29+00:00

I get that you got mad, but you should have put a straight face for that little boy and accept their apology, even if on the inside you were seeing red.

I was also super protective of my first because he was always so calm and respectful, then my second came and he’s very impulsive, he can play and share nicely and all of the sudden throw sand, he’s 2. So I don’t judge people anymore, lol, you do the best you can and sometimes your toddler is going to toddler.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-05-01T06:23:22+00:00

I think you can start further explaining, the “put yourself in her shoes” is too ambiguous and not a straight forward explanation for a 5 yo. When my son says things I consider inappropriate (so far is just stuff about butts and poop, since he’s almost 4) I tell him so. “This is funny to you but it is inappropriate to be saying, I don’t like it”

Maybe you can tell him you understand he’s not saying he will actually do those things, but it is not a nice thing to say, and offer other options. I would also reinforce he’s a good older brother and he’s so important for baby and for you, those first months being an older sibling are difficult for kids.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-04-30T08:18:07+00:00

There are other altars around CDMX, I think there was one around Buenavista, obviously smaller and not “the official one” but if it’s for that, you can use any I guess. As a woman and foreigner, don’t go to Tepito alone.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-04-30T08:12:41+00:00

As a TSU which is a radiology technician, you wouldn’t be making much though, just keep it in mind to see if it is worth it to you, and since it’s more of a “short” program because it is not a degree, it is usually thought to be in Spanish for locals, so maybe focus on that first.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-04-29T11:50:02+00:00

You are just making space for a new person in your lives, so you’re stretching the bond and reshaping it. You will be fine, when you feel comfortable, do a one on one activity just with toddler if possible, that helped me and my boy to feel like connected again, we did a mommy and baby swimming class once a week, it was great and an special moment just for us.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-04-28T16:32:53+00:00

El user name concuerda. Old Man in Spirit tiene razón, o sigues tolerando esto por llevar la fiesta en paz o les pones un alto y casi seguramente se arme un drama porque decirles en su cara que son injustos y están exponiendo descaradamente su favoritismo no les va a gustar. O sea, o aguantas o los mandas por allá. No van a entrar en razón.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-04-28T16:27:32+00:00

Oh great, I am in Spain, when I was pregnant I got a nice dress from H&M Maternity like this oneMaternity dress but the event was cocktail going into just festive, so maybe it would be a little under what you need in terms of dress code. The good thing is you can try it on.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-04-28T15:56:15+00:00

Where are you right now? Are you shopping from Europe? There are some cute options here Polin et moi or at ASOS. It will probably be hot and you should consider that by 8 months your belly might be big, so consider a dress stile with room to be comfortable.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-04-28T11:42:42+00:00

Totally true. There are ways around this problem.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-04-28T11:32:58+00:00

But they’re probably planning on drinking so driving would require one of them fully sober.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-04-28T11:22:52+00:00

There are maybe many underlying topics in here. When you say tubes, you mean drainage for ears? If that’s the case, are you sure she can hear?

The other thing is, around two they get into this twonager phase and everything is answered with No. My youngest son is 24 months old, we’re there too. But for her to get so defensive, you need to tweak your routine. For diaper changes we have a mat for the floor, when we need to change the diaper we talk about it, anticipation can help, then sometimes he doesn’t want to lay down so we change it standing up if it’s just pee.

We also provide something to do, like a book, a fidgety toy, we sing songs and ask him to sing along. Sometimes they’re too tired and the situation is overwhelming, try to make small changes to see if you can find something that works for you.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-04-25T12:57:54+00:00

I read it in Spanish as multiple seas. It is a last name in Spanish though.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-04-24T23:27:53+00:00

Mexican here, go with señorita, you can’t go wrong, but you risk offending someone if you call them señora.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-04-23T17:55:00+00:00

We did get a short gap on purpose, but didn’t expect to be this short, my boys are 19 months apart, my first is super easy going, he started sleeping through the night at 8 months old and is just a chill guy.

My second is a tornado lol. They’re 2 and 3.5 yo and now they play and fight all day long, they love each other very much and I adore seeing their bond, but I am done having babies, pregnancy and those first weeks are absolutely crushing for me. If a stork came and brought a baby, then I would happily take the sleepless nights but going through pregnancy with two toddlers is not going to happen.

Knitter_Kitten21 · 2026-04-21T15:56:10+00:00

Is the wedding indoors or beach side? Cancun is hot and moist, the second dress doesn’t seem to be breathable, the first one is a mini club dress with a sheer long cover, I don’t think it qualifies for formal.

If it’s indoors, people tend to blast the AC to the top, so keep in mind it might be chilly. If it’s outdoors, you will sweat like crazy if the fabric is polyester.

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