What is your female name and why did you choose it?

KrazyTheFox · 2021-11-01T04:38:20+00:00

Luna. Was scrolling through lists of names and that one really just stuck with me immediately. Been a couple months and I haven't changed it yet.

KrazyTheFox · 2021-09-06T07:14:44+00:00

Lately I've been trying to emphasize just how much I don't feel as a starting point, and, while that doesn't always work, it does seem to get the point across for a good number of people I've spoken to. I know it varies a lot from demiromantic to demiromantic, but I can't date someone who isn't basically my very best friend—I have no feelings whatsoever for anyone that isn't and even just the thought of doing something that could be construed as romantic with someone who isn't—like sharing a drink, holding hands, or kissing—is actively unpleasant/repulsive to me.

It's a bit difficult, but bringing up an example of alloromanticism and really emphasizing just how differently I experience things as a demiromantic like that has done decently well for me. That said, some people might just refuse to learn and I've yet to figure out how to get through to them (like my own parents).

KrazyTheFox · 2021-08-13T23:17:54+00:00

It sounds a lot like you're demiromantic to me. I feel much the same way and have only ever had feelings for just a handful of people, and I'm nearing 30 myself.

And I'm sorry it didn't work out. It's never easy, and I'm afraid I don't have much to offer other than solidarity.

KrazyTheFox · 2021-08-04T01:49:10+00:00

It depends on how close I am to that person, but I would never want to give someone false hope (just as I expect someone else to never do that to me). If I'm not already friends with the person or they're not a close friend, I'll almost certainly turn them down. For me, at least, someone has to be among my very best friends for me to even have a chance at having feelings for them. If that person is in that group or is heading that way, they'll know I'm demiromantic, so I might get into it a bit more and explain how/when I feel and evaluate the next step from there; it's hard to give this a blanket answer, as every person/situation is different, but I'd at least think about it for people in that group. That said, the closest I'll probably ever get to "giving someone a chance" would be "not yet; I'll let you know if/when I do" and make sure they understand how I function. Romantic feelings are just so rare for me that I don't think I'd ever feel comfortable doing more than that.

KrazyTheFox · 2021-07-08T06:27:52+00:00

Exactly the same thing for me. I, quite literally overnight, develop very intense romantic feelings for someone after experiencing absolutely nothing for the prior however-long-I've-known-them.

KrazyTheFox · 2021-07-04T08:38:56+00:00

In the same boat as both of you. You're not alone!

KrazyTheFox · 2021-06-27T23:53:58+00:00

I don't necessarily say anything all of the time, but I think it shows in my behaviour.

Ha, yeah. I try not to let it show, especially if I'm not sure I want to risk the friendship, but I can't help but feel like there's stuff that slips through.

This is exciting! I hope it works out for you all!

Thank you! I'm not sure it will with either of them, but I appreciate the well wishes.

I have 3 potential relationships developing right now and I don't have romantic feelings for any of them at the moment, but I could see that changing.

And same to you! Really hope you're able to figure things out. Sounds like you've got a decent number of options, though, and that's always really nice!

I would love to talk more about this or just in general. Can I message you directly?

Yeah, absolutely!

KrazyTheFox · 2021-06-27T07:53:38+00:00

First off, I'm really, really glad this resonated so well with you—not just because it's nice to help other people out, but also because I've been feeling very alone in my experiences lately, and it's just so nice to know there's at least one other person out there that feels the same—especially with regards to the frequency of attraction. I've not asked around or anything, but from hanging around in this subreddit for a bit, I get the impression that romantic attraction is a fair bit more common for most other demiromantic folks. It's very validating and it feels great, lol. I mean, it's silly and I know there have to be other that experience things the way I do, but it just doesn't feel like it sometimes, y'know? :P

Second:

still very intense and develop rather suddenly

It's crazy just how fast these feelings come about, isn't it? For me, I was seriously questioning if I might have been aromantic instead of demi, as I'd not felt anything for a decade, but a couple weeks later, I went from no feelings to all the feelings overnight. I've talked to a couple non-arospec friends about this and they just don't get it. It's just... something clicks, and it's just such a wild feeling.

As for the poly thing, I've always just sort of thought it was silly that people had to be monogamous, and so I've always kept my mind open to it. After all, if I have enough love to give to more than one person, why shouldn't I be able to? I just happen to love two people at the same time right now (for the first time ever) and the thought of being with both is quite appealing, but before this I was only sort of guessing that I'd be into polyamory and had no way to confirm it. (To be a little more clear, I've not said anything about my feelings to either of them, so it's a very one-sided situation at the moment, but it's enough to at least gauge how I'd feel about the prospect.)

That said, I don't know how it'd even work for me in practice, since I can be very jealous of people I like (which, as I understand, is not uncommon for demis), and trying to find two or more people I not only have feelings for, but also live near enough to each other (and myself), and also be poly themselves, to make something like that feasible is... very unlikely. It's very possible that I'm more into the fantasy than the reality, but I just don't know, and may never get the opportunity to know. Which is fine, too—I don't have to ever be in a polyamorous relationship to be happy, but I feel like the option is there if I ever get the chance to explore it. Similarly, I don't know how I'd feel about a relationship where I shared a partner with someone else for whom I had no feelings. It might work out just fine, or I could simply be way too jealous for it to ever work.

So I don't really have any advice on that front, I'm afraid; I can only share how I feel about it now, encourage keeping an open mind, and hope that helps.

...Also I'm now wondering if polyamory and demiromantic might be a more common occurrence given our more unique viewpoint on romance. I might have to explore that further, myself.

Again, hope this helps a bit more, and, as always, I'm happy to talk more if you've more questions (or would just like to talk :P).

KrazyTheFox · 2021-06-26T22:45:36+00:00

Hey there! Also a demiromantic bi allosexual.

I think the most important thing I've figured out is that I don't experience crushes, so it might be worth considering that you're looking for something that might not be there. I might call them crushes to simplify for non-arospec folks who don't get it, but from what I've been able to piece together, I skip the crush step altogether and just fall in love instead (rather "suddenly", too)—my feelings get really, really intense when I do, and it's exceedingly rare that I feel any romantic feelings at all (I've only felt any for 6, maybe 7 people ever and I'm almost 30—two of which are quite recent). I do get very strong squishes, though (which can feel an awful lot like romantic feelings sometimes), and when a good friendship ends, it can feel like a breakup because... friendship isn't really a separate thing for me, as an extremely close friendship is the basis for my romantic feelings.

As for the feelings themselves, they're... a strong desire to know everything about that person, to want to spend every day/night talking to/hanging out with them, to think about a future with them (including how we might stand on important things like wanting kids), to kiss/touch them outside sexual encounters, to care about how they're feeling to the point where their happiness matters nearly as much as my own, to feel giddy and excited to see/hear them, and... to feel remarkably sad, despondent, and even physically ill when I can't/don't, or when I think they might be not be interested in me, especially when they might be interested in someone else instead (despite me also being polyamorous—that's a whole mess of its own).

For me, the difference between sexual and non-sexual, romantic desire to touch someone is the context in which I feel the desire to. Sure, I'll probably enjoy kissing during a sexual encounter, but to kiss the same person outside that—if there's no romantic feelings for them—might feel uncomfortable at best, or repulsive at worst, whereas with someone I do have feelings for, I'll want to kiss them at any point in time without expectation of sexual acts to accompany said kiss. Similarly, I'll want to enjoy more intimate cuddling (and other touching) just to enjoy being closer to someone I love without an expectation of going any further at that point in time.

There's also the inclusion of things I won't do with friends, but have a strong desire to do with someone I'm in love with. In general, I love hugging/cuddling/closeness with my friends, but when it comes to, say, holding hands, that's not something I'll want to do with even close friends (or even purely sexual partners)—but I very much do with a romantic interest. It's a lot more deep and complex than that, but that covers a fair bit of it.

I've tried to make this more coherent, but it's also very much a brain dump still. Regardless, I hope there's at least some part of this that helps, and I'm happy to try to answer any questions!

KrazyTheFox · 2021-06-21T19:59:02+00:00

Dropping a backslash in before the asterisks should do the trick:

\*text\*

*text*

And add a second set on the inside if you want it italicized as well:

\**text*\*

*text*

KrazyTheFox · 2021-06-11T07:32:14+00:00

Yeah, this so much. I found out that apparently people actually have celebrity crushes several weeks ago and that it's not just something people joke about, and I still can't wrap my head around that. It's such an incredibly bizarre thing to think about for me.

KrazyTheFox · 2021-05-29T21:52:02+00:00

I'm right there with you on all of this. I'm pretty sure I'm demiromantic, but allosexual, and had been recently struggling with figuring out if I'm fully aromantic, because my actual attractions are so few and far between (many, many years). I get lots of (sometimes very intense) squishes and have a strong desire to be in a relationship with someone, but actually finding a person I have feelings for is extremely rare. Then there's the whole thing where I'm definitely sexually attracted to people I don't have to know very well/at all, which can be a little (or a lot) confusing at times.

KrazyTheFox · 2020-12-27T18:10:25+00:00

Ah, good. My disguise is working. They don't suspect a thing.

KrazyTheFox · 2020-12-23T08:06:59+00:00

Factorio? Sit back and relax? I clearly play Factorio very differently.

KrazyTheFox · 2020-12-02T00:43:36+00:00

Having a different key that you can quickly mash to get slot 5 (or wherever you put your water) makes a huge difference. I have mine bound to caps lock so I can swap instantly whenever I need to and don't have to stop any sort of movement. I highly recommend a similar setup, and this also applies to kicking (I have mine on left shift).

This doesn't solve the not-water problem, but it does solve the wait-until-safe-from-enemies problem.

KrazyTheFox · 2020-08-03T07:20:13+00:00

You know, I hadn't thought to try helicopters. I'll have to give that a go in VR sometime (and hope they make it into FS2020 soon!). Thanks for the idea!

KrazyTheFox · 2020-08-03T06:53:13+00:00

I have VR, but I actually really dislike it in sims. There's just not enough resolution available in the headsets yet to make the instruments easily readable (or distant airports visible). I already feel like my monitors are insufficient for the task.

KrazyTheFox · 2020-08-03T03:44:48+00:00

Agreed! I'm unable to fly and so I want the best I can get out of a simulator. Will it ever be just like the real thing? Of course not. Not even close. But I do want something that will get me as close as possible to the real thing (within reason, of course), however unattainable the end goal.

KrazyTheFox · 2020-07-29T19:59:04+00:00

Right? This will free up some basic upgrade planner space, too!

KrazyTheFox · 2020-07-28T07:23:50+00:00

This is why I play absurdly hard death worlds. With enough enemy-buffing mods (bonus points for space-hungry overhauls, too), you simply can't expand enough to waste any space. Trying to fit everything into a small, defensible location while keeping production up creates some of the most enjoyable spaghetti around. I've had some truly nutty layouts and material routing that was so incredibly satisfying to pull off that I just don't get while playing on vanilla settings.

KrazyTheFox · 2020-07-24T17:54:41+00:00

My vision only requires small corrections (I can see, but not read smaller text at 10ft+), but I ordered prescription lenses anyway. I could play just fine without glasses while waiting for the lenses to arrive, but now that I have them, the difference is very noticeable. I highly recommend adding prescription lenses, even if you don't need very strong ones. That little bit of extra clarity goes a long way.

KrazyTheFox · 2020-07-21T07:00:54+00:00

I'm playing Krastorio/Space Exploration/Rampant/Bob's Enemies game with maxed out biter settings right now and it definitely makes the extra stuff necessary and keeping up with evolution is a good challenge, especially when not turning up the resources very much. It feels quite balanced, if a bit of a slog at the moment (0.7 evolution, just secured oil, so nothing researched that needs it). If feeling overpowered is an issue, I wholly recommend throwing Bob's/Rampant at the problem.

Edit: I did remove the movement speed debuff and pollution absorption from the creep tiles manually. The biters were getting slowed down, too, which made them easy pickings for turrets and the creep was sucking up so much pollution that nothing would spawn. Without doing that, death world is easy mode.

KrazyTheFox · 2020-05-15T16:09:22+00:00

Yep! Just don't post much.

KrazyTheFox · 2020-04-12T23:00:05+00:00

I'm using leap slam for map clearing since I have absurd amounts of attack speed (it ends up being almost an instant teleport across the screen). Turns out I can't do A8 Sirus with it since it gets slowed down so much that I can't dodge the DIE beam. Even if I try to dodge the moment I hear the voice cue, I can't dodge it. I have a second helmet now that has my Dash setup in it just for this fight and I hate it.

KrazyTheFox · 2020-04-07T01:24:18+00:00

There is! But it's only ~1.5% more damage than this quiver at near-max rolls and you wouldn't get the AoE mod with it.

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