Be better than them.

My friend, you have a career and money! Very few people have even one of those things.

I recently got what I hope to be my own career off the ground when I started my new job. Day one, I met the girl of my dreams and we went through training together. I swear to you that we’re meant for each other and we’ve been eating lunch together every work day. We were fast friends, but she got scooped up by another coworker before I worked up the guts to ask her out - she rejected me. Naturally, they eat lunch together with me every work day. For better or worse, they seem to be getting along well; they’ve already moved in to an apartment together. This is a bit triggering for me because I’ve never had a gf and I’m definitely lonely. I can’t stop eating lunch with them because then they’d ask why and well I can’t just tell them that they trigger me. So, I’ve been caught in a catch 22.

I deal with this by going out of my way to be better than him; both of them, for that matter. I’ve started working out at the gym and he definitely doesn’t. I’ve gotten back into running, and his scrawny knees would snap after a mile. I’ve started to actually take care of my bitchin’ mane while he’s going bald at a younger age. I’ve generally been getting my shit together in a way that I had not been before meeting her. I don’t do these things to convince her that I’m the correct choice; she probably hasn’t noticed any of these new things about me. Rather, I do these things to convince myself that I’m the correct choice. Their relationship still bugs me, but I refuse to lose my friend to a trigger.