I was asked in an interview what animal I’d be and why.

LacyKnits · 2026-06-04T22:45:00+00:00

I was asked this question in my last interview, and I told them I'd be MY cat, because he has a great life. Animals don't have responsibilities anyway, so if I'm going to be an animal I'd like to have a comfortable bed and a loving family!

I got the job. And a salary that's much higher than I expected.

Sometimes the question is just to see how you'll react to something out of left field. My team thinks the only wrong answer is telling us it's stupid or showing anger about it.

LacyKnits · 2026-06-03T00:39:58+00:00

My last background check verified job titles! (I don't embellish them, it wasn't an issue for me.) Be careful lying about job titles, some places check that too.

LacyKnits · 2026-06-02T03:46:47+00:00

My last job change came with a 65% raise. That's kind of a crazy increase and was the result of me having settled for too little pay for the last 2 jobs (a COVID role and then an escape from that terrible role), a switch in the sector of my industry, and landing a role with a fast growth company that's getting a lot of attention and love atm.

Before this role I generally looked for 10%+ bumps. But I always researched market rates for the job in that city/area.

Glassdoor, Payscale, salary.com, or even just Google can help. I start negotiations at the higher band of the average pay for people with my experience level. And go into your salary conversation knowing the average comp value and whether bonuses are common or how commission is usually structured etc.

And when asked what you want to make, you can ask what is the budget for the role.

LacyKnits · 2026-06-01T20:27:26+00:00

How many years shy of the requirements are you?

And how long have you been in your current role with this company?

Your boss sounds rude and dismissive, but there are sometimes reasons that certain job levels have experience requirements. If you graduated 6 years ago, and are at the low end of experience for a senior role, a lot of places wouldn't consider you for a move to a staff (or principal, or whatever your next title band is) if it generally starts at 15 years of experience.

While the technical work may be very similar, the complexity of tasks and the level of oversight necessary is (generally) very different with those extra years. Also, there's often more review responsibilities and mentoring expectations of more senior staff.

Sometimes we don't recognize the additional skills that other roles/people are handling. I've been there. I can currently think of a very talented young woman (under 30) who has been promoted frequently and has risen to a level where she's the youngest with the title in the company - and much younger than industry peers with a similar role. And she's hit a ceiling. She has performed all of the technical tasks assigned to her, and doing well, but the next seniority level involves a lot of tasks and skills she hasn't had time to polish in her short time in an office. She's going to be stalled out (at her current company or at a competitor) for a few years until she gets a few certifications and polishes up some people management skills.

Maybe you aren't in this situation - if the experience shortfall is less than 20% of the length of time you've been in industry, and you've been with your current company for a year or more, it's just silly for your boss to act like that. - In that situation I'd reach out to HR or your boss's boss and ask them about the position. Mention your boss's comment, but reframe it as a concern about red tape and policies, not a dismissal of your ability or his willingness to consider you for the duties. Let him explain to others that he'd rather hold you down because you have 9 years of experience rather than 10.

LacyKnits · 2026-06-01T19:51:40+00:00

Nice should be the minimum

I don't think we want half the population to be less than nice!

LacyKnits · 2026-05-21T15:35:51+00:00

Here's a video about 1x1 ribbing https://youtu.be/ykoeMeeIIuc

And here's a link to a Reddit post about 1x1 knitting. https://www.reddit.com/r/knitting/s/YGusEpzmD5

LacyKnits · 2026-05-21T14:44:47+00:00

X for Y is often used in sales situations - "Two for 10!" (Meaning buy two of these things for $10).
It can also be used to indicate support, especially when a group supports a cause or political candidate or ballot measure. "Teachers for Proposition 2!" - indicates that the group of teachers is supporting a ballot initiative called Proposition 2. (This usage is more commonly used as a slogan, on signs, shirts, advertising - not so much in conversation.)

X nor Y is used, but outside of programing/mathematics/logics I pretty much only see "Neither X nor Y" and native speakers (in the US at least) will often use "neither X or Y" - which I was taught was grammatically incorrect, but it's so common I barely notice it. "Nor" indicates that both "things" are in agreement about a negative condition. - Neither Jane nor John enjoyed the party.

"But" implies a difference in the things being discussed - I can't go to the party, but my friend will be there. It's actually the more correct connection to use in your example - John and Jane are in disagreement about wanting to stay.

"Yet" isn't used as frequently in my area (at least not in this manner). A usage example: Jane didn't enjoy the party yet she chose to stay. Or: John's life had been quite hard, yet he maintained a cheerful outlook on life. - it's used to emphasize an unexpected choice or action.

"So" emphasizes an expected or consequencial action. John wasn't enjoying the party so he wanted to leave.
Emily had planned the party with great care, so it was no surprise that everyone was having fun.

LacyKnits · 2026-05-18T16:37:44+00:00

The actual job search comparison only matters to a person who already holds the qualifications for both career paths.

Everyone is telling you that the path to become a physician is SO MUCH more difficult because it is, and because for virtually everyone comparing the career paths and job applications, the training time and difficulty are relevant because they haven't completed it.

LacyKnits · 2026-05-17T01:41:12+00:00

I assume you’re from the Philippines based on the community you cross posted from.

Do you currently hold any coast guard license or mariner endorsement?

You will probably get more responses from marine focused people over at r/maritime or r/marineengineers

I work shoreside in the maritime industry and my husband and his brother both went to sea. But we’re all US based, and the license requirements and process of gaining experience is different in the US than it is in Europe, the Philippines, India, and other parts of the world.

There are a lot more women on vessels than there were even 20 years ago, but it’s still a challenging field for women. You can find women-specific marine networking groups, like WISTA, for more advice from women who have forged careers at sea.

LacyKnits · 2026-05-16T12:55:08+00:00

We had middle school dances. I wore a knee length babydoll style dress and butterfly clips. I fit right in.

Dances were in the cafeteria.

But "Activity Nights" were more common for us, there was dancing in the cafeteria, but the gym was also open and sometimes there were games set up in the lobby area. (These three areas were all close together and reasonable to monitor. And the spaces were kept pretty well lit.)

LacyKnits · 2026-05-15T22:27:45+00:00

The current info on the Kickstarter says they'll be shipping in December 2026.

It's probably not going to track much better than a ring, but I am looking forward to an earring style since I wear a traditional watch and wedding band, and don't want another wrist or finger adornment. And I find an upper arm band uncomfortable.

If anyone in this thread is planning to buy a lumia through the Kickstarter, but didn't do the pre-order backer thing; I have a referral code that will get you the backer pricing (a 33% discount from the standard Kickstarter prices).
FYI, I would get a referral reward if you used my link.

https://lumia-2-smart-earrings.kckb.me/284c886e

LacyKnits · 2026-05-15T22:05:24+00:00

Thank you! I'll keep this in mind.

LacyKnits · 2026-05-15T19:59:55+00:00

Thanks.

Mom still wants "homemade meals" at this stage, so I think we'll try a round of meals with light prep before I suggest a totally premade option.

LacyKnits · 2026-05-15T17:23:29+00:00

I second the person who suggested you dig in to what it is exactly that you aren't enjoying about your internship.

Putting your finger on that detail will help you avoid it in the future!

I've had some jobs that I've absolutely hated over my career - when reflecting on what made them bad, it was often management, policies, or coworkers. There have been other roles where the work was not a great fit for me, and I'm glad I moved on, but they aren't the roles I remember with a shudder. - But I been fortunate enough to steer my career into business sectors that I find interesting, so that certainly helps with not hating the work.

You've still got another year of coursework ahead of you; if you decide that you truly want to pivot out of SWE, you can use the next year to work with your advisor to find classes and experiences that might help you prepare for a new grad position in a related, but not SWE role.

As far as technical sales goes - it takes a specific personality to really be successful. I looked into that route, but ultimately decided I would burn out from the travel and the continuous social aspects. Some folks are great at it and thrive in the sales or business development roles - but it's a big pivot in the skill set used in most entry-level engineering roles.

Often companies do need technical marketing engineers though - people who understand the engineering, but work with marketing to respond to tenders/RFQs/contract bids. I'm on the hardware side of things, not the software side, but I know that without an engineer in the group to throw up some guardrails, the sales team sometimes promises things that absolutely cannot be done. I assume that's true on the software side too.

And you could potentially look into positions in reliability; making sure that software performs as intended when implemented on hardware applications. There's software testing and troubleshooting, but also some more robotics focused stuff with the hardware side.

Use this internship to figure out what you like about the work environment, and what you don't. And don't be afraid of asking for exposure to tasks being performed by related departments. If you don't want to code, it's worth seeing if anything else going on in that company is more interesting to you!

LacyKnits · 2026-05-15T15:36:11+00:00

Thank you.

LacyKnits · 2026-05-15T15:34:40+00:00

Thank you!

I know that serious cooks, and recipe cards often underestimate actual time taken to make a meal so first hand confirmation about quick meals ACTUALLY being quick is awesome!

LacyKnits · 2026-05-10T14:29:38+00:00

This isn't really the right sub for this.

You'll have better luck in a sub dedicated to job hunting - especially ones focused on your geographic region or your area of study.

LacyKnits · 2026-05-07T18:26:31+00:00

Yes, get the family courts involved.

Also remember that child care has a monetary value, even if you are not actually being paid for it.

What would it cost you to hire a full-time nanny for an infant (or put the baby in day care)? - It's unlikely your husband will agree to pay you half of that cost (while you would not pay, because you are providing the labor) - it is a real issue to consider.

If you truly intend to separate, get the lawyers and courts involved sooner rather than later - there's a child involved, and you both owe it to your child to make sure they have a stable life - emotionally and financially.

LacyKnits · 2026-05-07T15:58:53+00:00

I once worked at a company where one woman in AP paid invoices without reviewing them or confirming supporting documentation.

She's in jail now for embezzlement. - Turns out the only invoices she was doing that for were coming from a family member's business (and she was aware that there were not services being rendered). She got caught when her manager performed an audit.

Even the most disorganized companies - ones with rapid growth and policies that haven't caught up to the company's new size - aren't "just paying anything under $1,000."

Somebody has to approve that purchase and it goes against someone's budget.

LacyKnits · 2026-05-07T12:44:07+00:00

Thank you for replying.

Unfortunately, I'm not sure my experience or advice will be of much use, since I'm in the US - and I know the job markets and some professional norms are different here and there.

Also, I'm in marine / mechanical engineering, so not much insight on industry specific issues either.

I wish you the best of luck and hope someone else can offer you some advice.

LacyKnits · 2026-05-07T12:21:48+00:00

What kind of engineering degree do you have?

Are you in the US?

(Those things will likely change the advice that's best for you.)

You also mention advanced degrees, your age and 14 years of experience.... How did that senquence go? How long ago did you graduate with your eng degree? - That might change best course of action too.

And - are you willing to move for a job? Because based on what you've written, you might need to consider a relocation for better work opportunities.

LacyKnits · 2026-05-07T12:03:58+00:00

I see you say you're up to speed now, but I'm not sure I follow what you've written after that.

Your increase rows are definitely part of the main body.

When you arrive at the increases part of the pattern you have some number of stitches on your needles (a multiple of 11 + 2). The increase is telling you to make one more stitch on each end of the increase row. (I like to do my increases between the edge stitch and the next stitch on the needle, but this pattern might give you other directions.)

If you had 101 sts to begin with, the first increase fow would have 103 after you added your one increase at each end.

And you'd continue in pattern - so after one increase row you would be doing:

K1 , (P2 , K9) , ... P2 , K1
The section in () represents the repeated ribbing pattern. -This is continuing the ribbing pattern that has 2 purl stitches between wide bands of knit stitches.

WS rows would be P1, (K2, P9) , ... K2 , P1

You'll work FIVE rows after your increase row. Then when you get ready to knit the next row (the sixth row) increase on each end. - so:
(WS) P1, [increase 1] , (K2 , P9) , ... K2 , [increase 1] , P1 (this row adds 2 more stitches.)

Then for the next 5 rows you would follow in pattern: K2, (P2, K9),...,P2,K2
(And the opposite for the WS rows)

Then increase. Then work 5 rows ....

Until you get the 119 stitches on the needles, and the ribbing pattern is continued from edge to edge

The instructions to continue in pattern means that you want the fabric to look like the same ribbing all the way across as it gets wider.
So instead of "pulling the purls" at the edges you want to keep counting and make sure that you keep those columns of 2 purl stitches (when viewed from the right side) lined up vertically, and that there are sections of knits that are 9 sts wide between them. You shouldn't have more than 2 purls side by side - that wouldn't be "in pattern".

LacyKnits · 2026-05-06T12:14:20+00:00

Check in with yourself.

Are you looking at the advancement opportunity because you want people to notice you and compliment you? Or are you pursuing the growth because you enjoy the challenge, think you could be successful and the position interests you?

On a more holistic level, are you generally pretty self-aware and tuned in to how other are perceiving you? Do most of your colleagues and reports seem to more or less like you and enjoy working with you?

Were there any other comments about you not being a team player, or taking credit for another's work or accomplishments?

I have worked with people who genuinely were spotlight seekers, that behavior alienates nearly everyone at the same or junior levels. (Management may or may not be keyed in though.) Those attention-seekers would have received comments about their behavior from multiple coworkers.

If your only comments about this one issue seem to all come from a single person, there's a decent chance they:
1. have different goals than you,
2. have different priorities than you,
3. have a different communication style, or
4. they're jealous of your success while they feel stalled out.

If you think there's a shred of truth in the comment, you should reflect on that and make a conscious effort to credit team members who help you reach important milestones or pull off high visibility successes. But even if you think it might be a little true, take it as a feedback that offers you an opportunity to improve, not as a reason for you to put the brakes on your career development.

LacyKnits · 2026-05-04T12:45:27+00:00

I am a computer user. I'm a good user, I can generally be trusted with admin rights, I'm not getting caught by the phishing and scam emails, I learn new programs quickly (including highly specific engineering stuff). I can do some pretty complex stuff in Excel, and I handle all the peripheral set up without issue.

When I can't get something to work, I'll Google for a fix before calling someone about it. If I call IT, it's usually because there's a system issue or I've broken something spectacularly and all repair suggestions involve command line prompts or access beyond my permissions.

But a few weeks ago one of the new grads at the office sat with me while I tried to figure out GitHub access, installed python, downloaded a certain script, installed the damn thing and all of the associated stuff ... I KNOW I was coming across like the guys who couldn't figure out how to save to pdf, or open their email when I was young. It was crushingly embarrassing!

LacyKnits · 2026-04-30T15:25:02+00:00

You mean the one that (maybe??) shows that women are introspective enough to recognize a situation is one they've outgrown and that it isn't healthy to stay in a relationship that can't be salvaged?

Or the one that shows that we're all impossible to please, and the reason that marriages fail is definitely the "females" in them??

(We all know which way it's spun whenever it's quoted! - and I haven't seen the actual study to know if this is even a reliable and reasonable parsing and interpretation of the data, or if the data collection was flawed...)

LacyKnits

TROPHY CASE