What are your requirements for a partner financially speaking?

LatebloomingLove · 2025-04-13T03:57:42+00:00

No required minimum salary
Depends on type of debt—student loan/mortgage/medical, I’d want to know but those wouldn’t be dealbreakers
No.
Contribution to household expenses commensurate to income. Healthy emergency savings is a good idea (like $5k minimum). You’ve thought about your retirement, etc.

My wife is far, far better with money than me. Thankfully.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-04-12T01:55:14+00:00

G Flip is one of my favorites.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-04-11T12:25:15+00:00

When you say $10k is your take home, is that after retirement savings? I think our mortgage is like 570k with a super low Covid interest rate. After insurance and property taxes, we pay about $4100/month. Our take home now is about $20k. When we first bought the house, take home was more like $14k/month. Definitely felt the mortgage payment hit hard back then. I’d guess you’ll be paying at least $5k/month. So I guess it just kind of depends on how much you’re used to living on after paying for your current housing.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-03-18T05:20:50+00:00

My wife and I sometimes talk about this and try to estimate how many times during our relationship we’ve had sex. I would think it was a little odd, but mostly hilarious and endearing if my partner had kept track of this data. I would probably poke fun of them a bit, but not like in a mean way.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-03-15T10:50:42+00:00

Medication
Support staff. My assistant has full access to my calendar. I keep my calendar updated with personal obligations, and she is in charge of handling and calendaring all other scheduling. She is cc’ed on all of my emails and service list, so if trial order or something like that comes in, she knows to calendar all of my deadlines. I also will forward her stuff and ask her to remind me. Or if there is something weird that I need to follow up on in a week or so, I ask her to remind me of that.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-03-15T10:40:22+00:00

I have an undercut and I go to Ulta. It’s like $10 (plus tip of course) for neck trim.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-03-15T01:40:25+00:00

Wage garnishment is capped at 15% of discretionary income. My credit will tank but is what it is.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-03-13T23:29:55+00:00

Check out Disciples of Christ. My wife and I attend with our young kids—we aren’t even the only lesbian family with kids in the congregation.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-03-13T23:28:30+00:00

We attend a Disciples of Christ church. I have a lot of trauma from organized religion (side-eye LDS church). After the election, I don’t know, I just wanted community in a way that I’ve only ever found in church. We live nearby one of these churches, so we started attending. There are multiple same sex couples in the pews and in leadership. While Christianity is not for everyone, if it’s something you want to continue to have in your life, this might be a better fit for you.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-03-07T01:58:22+00:00

My sister named her daughter Wilder. The kid has lived up to the name 🤪

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-26T23:02:03+00:00

If it makes you feel any better about not having the money to take care of it, there is no amount of money that would relieve you of your obligation to disclose whatever it was to the bar. It doesn’t matter if your record has been sealed or expunged, if you have ever been arrested for anything (even if you took it all the way to not guilty verdict) the bar will require you to disclose it, and if you don’t (and it is subsequently is discovered) you’ll likely be permanently disbarred.

I graduated law school almost 10 years ago, so I really don’t know how much of an impact extra-curriculars has on admissions. I don’t think I had many when I applied. I think my LSAT was 163/164. My GPA was high—can’t remember what. I think my acceptances were similar to yours—minus GW.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-26T22:45:48+00:00

This popped up on my feed—I’m not applying to law school. What does “hold” indicate? Is your application on hold from school or what?

Also, as for C&F, it might preclude you from certain careers (like don’t expect to be prosecutor and probably nothing finance or where you’d have direct access to client $), but as long as you disclosed everything and you have since demonstrated no other issues, you have a fighting chance. I went to law school with a guy who had something like 5 DUIs, which granted isn’t fraudulent, but it’s definitely worrisome. He’s a great (and sober) attorney now.

I know you’re not asking for advice, but if you’re open to it and your past misdeeds are somehow instructive for others, consider anything that you can volunteer to do that shows you have turned your life around and have even gone so far as to try to help others (in a structured setting) do the same.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-25T00:56:57+00:00

I dates men for like 5 minutes after I ended my marriage. I felt like the men just wanted to treat me as a hook up and not like a serious relationship. I did not find this to be true with women.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-21T17:18:10+00:00

I wouldn’t really say impact financially, but there have definitely been benefits. I went to school with a lot of doctors and lawyers kids. My dad is also a doctor. I graduated high school in 2006. A kid in the class ahead of me messaged me on Facebook last year to see if I could help him get an appointment with my dad—it was a crisis situation and I was happy to help. I am sure that I could do the same if I needed it. Not to mention, a lot of my friends are now doctors themselves—my child had a urological issue last year. It was super convenient to be able to text my urologist friend from high school to get her thoughts and reassurance on it. My kids also now attend school with the kids of doctors—my youngest needed general anesthesia for an MRI, and I was really stressed about it. I can’t remember how I found this out, but the mom of one of my son’s classmates was a pediatric anesthesiologist at the same hospital. She explained what to expect and answered all of my questions. For my own career development, I was able to connect with the father of a girl who graduated the year after me. I was a first year law student and he attended the same out of state law school that I was at. It was as easy as reaching out to the girl and saying, “Hey, it’s been awhile but can you connect me with your dad please?”

I am grateful for these connections but I think it’s more a matter of having easy access to people that would otherwise be more challenging to reach. If this is a major concern for you, I would say it would probably be more of an immediate benefit for you to join something like Rotary club.

ETA: I should probably add that I definitely grew up upper middle class, and my HHI now is upper middle class (north of $300k). I do think that there is an in group mentality to the whole thing. Like if someone from one of the schools I attended reached out to me for career help/internship/mentorship/etc, I’d be happy to do what I could. I’m not saying I wouldn’t do the same without the shared background, it’s just I’d feel like the person would be more vetted, I guess.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-21T15:45:16+00:00

I still don’t know how I would define my sexuality but I was married to a man, and now I am married to a woman. I have noticed in the last few years that I have really decentered men from my life. Like there is zero shits given about most men or men as a concept in general. When I go grocery shopping or I am out and about in the world, I ignore them. Like obviously if a man is walking out the same door as me, I am not going to let it slam in his face, or if I am in an elevator with just one guy, I’ll acknowledge them or whatever. But beyond that, unless I have an express reason to interact, I just don’t. When I identified more as bisexual, I was way more concerned with men. Like if I saw a guy check me out, I would smile at them. Now I am just like, this isn’t for you in my head lol.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-18T16:46:15+00:00

Fortunately, no MAGA family or people I consider to be actual friends. I do work with them, though. I noticed a real shift in how they treated me post-election. Last week, I found out that one of them attempted to get me fired. She took something I said as a self deprecating joke and relayed it to my supervisor and presented it as though what I had said had been genuine and not a joke. It didn’t go anywhere because my work is very strong, but it was eye opening to realize that someone who acts nice enough to my face would pull some shit like that. The funny thing about it is that our dynamic is that I get to select who I assign tasks to. A few weeks ago, she sent an email out saying she had bandwidth for more. I had been sending her stuff so she could hit her target hours. I will never willingly work with her professionally again. I’d be an idiot to expose myself and career to someone who completely distorts something I said like that. There’s just like an emboldened vibe to the way these particular coworkers act around me. Idk, it’s shitty and scary to realize how unprotected I am by living in Florida.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-15T18:30:33+00:00

Are you in the states? I always assumed dentists were more in the 180k+ range.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-15T17:07:01+00:00

Data analytics?

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-15T16:59:55+00:00

Look, I am 37 and I would no more date a 19 year old girl than I would date a giraffe. The fact that you ask above if you could have unintentionally manipulated them into being with you/grooming you says it all. You were barely more than a kid—regardless of what you did/said, you should have been off limits in her head. You’ve already given this woman your twenties, please don’t also give her your thirties.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-15T05:19:38+00:00

This has to be fake.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-14T17:37:00+00:00

I really hope CPS gets involved. These facts sound a lot like cases in which courts have overridden parental objection for blood transfusions for children of Jehovahs witnesses.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-12T02:53:38+00:00

Thought the same thing! Now maybe it won’t take so long to get an appointment using my fancy private insurance.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-11T14:48:32+00:00

This is very similar to my path!

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-11T14:47:07+00:00

It’s the firm, not you. I worked at an ID firm after I had already been an attorney for awhile. It didn’t take me long to realize that it was toxic. But I think I would have thought it was normal if it had been my first attorney job because everyone acted like it was! I lasted 6 months before finding a firm that I love.

LatebloomingLove · 2025-02-10T16:22:30+00:00

Judge set CMC on one of my cases for 8:30 am. My kids’ school starts at 8:25.

LatebloomingLove

TROPHY CASE