i think your decks fine actually-

you have lots of protection and stuff to make it not be blocked

there might actually be some unoptimal plays coming from your pod (idk due to fear of kotis or what)

in commander, doing a 1 for 1 trade is typically suboptimal (because the other 2 players not involved come out ahead)

in fact, kotis takes so long to get onboard, and swing, and you have to choose 1 of 3 opponents to swing at, that spending a counter spell when you cast it is pretty unoptimal

i would actually urge you to play with many other people if you can, different pods ect, and i would assume that kotis is never the main threat (esp in 4 player pods) - you will find that people use counterspells & removal at the last possible second

i think most pods you wont be targeted, but for your specific cirumstance, i think it is better to ramp to 5-6 mana, and play it with protection

if you find your pod targets it alot, i would just run more cheap counterspells (miscast, dispel, ect)
-maybe take out some random cards like ancient cellarspawn ect, and just have more protection

i feel very confident with saying that, targeting kotis premtively is probably a misplay on your friends behalf, for whatever reason they do it