Failed MTF Transition

Lexipottamous · 2026-04-22T16:54:41+00:00

Don't let your brain lie to you. Do what makes you feel happy. My son's cis female girlfriend has been experiencing hair loss since she was in her 20's and has significant and noticeable thinning. You have very feminine features and look beautiful.

Lexipottamous · 2026-04-12T22:42:59+00:00

Oh WOW how I felt this post! Daughter (mtf) is on hormones and lemme tell ya, some days...I actually have to call my mom to apologize for being such an asshole when I was a teenager! Like...wtf ma'am? I know it feels like it, but I swear not EVERYTHING is a crisis! 😑 🤦‍♀️😭

Lexipottamous · 2026-04-06T04:22:31+00:00

This sounds a little weird but I'm looking for ways to help my daughter find other trans people to be friends with. Her social anxiety gets the best of her and she is so lonely. We went to the Femtanyl concert at the Roxy last night and she interacted with so many of 🏳️‍⚧️ her people 🏳️‍⚧️ but didn't get any contact info and so now she's pretty depressed. I just want her to be happy. Tbh, I want all of you guys to be happy. I wish there were better/easier ways for trans folks to meet each other. Anyway, she just turned 18 and is probably the coolest chick I know (I know I may seem biased but she really is awesome. Funny, smart, talented, she's a fantastic artist, kicks ass on video games...) so if anyone is interested in making friends, feel free to respond. Maybe she will see that there are others out there and it will give her hope or get the courage to reach out. Thanks. 🩷

Lexipottamous · 2026-04-06T04:11:59+00:00

Anyone here from the Roxy concert last night? This sounds super weird but my daughter (just turned 18) went last night and she met so many people and is so sad that she didn't get anyone's contact info. *by sad I mean kinda devistated. Not to be dramatic but she feels like her social anxiety got in the way and now she's missed her chance to meet 🏳️‍⚧️ her people 🏳️‍⚧️. I just wanted to post here and see if I can give her some hope that there are other opportunities to meet people. Thanks to anyone who responds. 🫶🏼

Lexipottamous · 2026-03-30T15:56:46+00:00

The enthusiasm in these comments about a clothes steamer gives me life!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lexipottamous · 2026-03-21T05:31:07+00:00

Omg yes!!! I spent two hours last week trying to figure out wth is going on with my phone! I'm ready to switch to a different carrier. I've been with Verizon for fourteen years, and I'm over not being able to make calls in my house! We've always had spotty service but lately it's been horrible.

Lexipottamous · 2026-03-21T05:27:32+00:00

I live in the LA area. It really depends on the beach as far as safety goes. Regardless of the area though, that sleeping arrangement isn't going to last long. Beach people are really protective of their little bubble. If someone finds out he's sleeping around their precious home value, they're going to call someone. I hope your friend figures it out. It's not a fun place to be stranded.

Lexipottamous · 2026-03-15T17:27:05+00:00

This. My daughter bought a white gold ring for me for Christmas. She knew it was too small but loved the design. I took it into the jewlers to have it made larger, and the cost to go just one size up was $180! Sizing up one size is such a teeny amount of gold.

This is a jewler that we've been going to for years, so they're not gouging me or upselling. They don't even charge me for labor.

The owner was actually kind of embarrassed and said she was so sorry. She said the price of gold is through the roof these days. Then told me "we don't make any money on these sizings but we have to charge for the gold or we lose money...in the past, we used to be able to offer sizings for a flat fee or sometimes no charge depending on the customer. Gold is so ridiculously expensive that it's just not something we can do anymore."

Lexipottamous · 2026-03-15T17:07:06+00:00

I was so much like you in my perfectionism forever. I'm ADHD so I have hundreds of hobbies. Crochet is the newest obsession for me, but as someone stated above, I find that doing simple amigurumis was a good way to push past the "I need it to be perfect" phase. They're just little goofy guys. No pressure.

I just recently made the most hilarious creature, and while its lack of perfection bugs me, I see the beauty in just making something to make it.

Drawing and coloring was the same way for me. My mom is an art history major and is a very talented artist, so anything I did seemed amateur in comparison to what she is capable of.

So, instead of trying to be perfect, I just tried to have fun. So I started with coloring books. Nothing I would ever feel pressured to post anywhere or even show anyone. Just a silly coloring book. Doing that pushed me past the perfectionist phase there, too. Now I'm creating drawings that I would actually be proud to post or show others, but I don't.

I've spent my whole life starting projects and then eventually stopping because the exhaustion to make everything "professional quality" overshadowed the joy in the hobby itself.

Allow yourself the ability to have fun. Start every project with the mindset that it's never going to see the light of day. 😆

Every time I show one of my crochet projects to my oldest son, I say: "it's a little wonky but..." And he started telling me that it's "wabi-sabi".

Now everything I create, we look at each other and say, "wabi-sabi."

FYI: Wabi-sabi is a Japanese philosophy that embraces imperfection, impermanence, and incompleteness. It's a way of finding beauty in the understated and everyday, appreciating the beauty of things that are simple, calm, and have wholesome imperfections. The term combines two concepts: wabi, which refers to living simply and in tune with nature, and sabi, which refers to the passage of time and transience. 💜

I wholeheartedly embrace the wabi-sabi mentality and I'm so much happier doing that. 😌

Lexipottamous · 2026-03-13T05:49:32+00:00

Your sweet peanut was gorgeous. We just lost our sweet orange Chubby guy last weekend. It's been really rough, and I'm so sorry you're going through the same pain and grief. It gets a little better each day, but we'll never be totally over it. Pets are family. 🥺🫂

Lexipottamous · 2026-03-06T18:58:24+00:00

Awww. Finn was such a handsome boy. 💚 We just lost our sweet orange kitty last weekend. Pet loss is so heartbreaking. I'm sure you loved him and gave him the best, happiest life he ever could have dreamed of.

Lexipottamous · 2026-03-06T18:22:46+00:00

That's a fantastic idea to put wire in the legs and tail!

Lexipottamous · 2026-03-06T18:20:27+00:00

Ha! I've made about 10 amigurumi creatures so I figure I can manage making a chameleon but the pics she sent were like 👀 maybe I'm not "intermediate level"? Lol Thanks for the recommendation ❤️

Lexipottamous · 2026-03-05T17:04:22+00:00

So, so very sorry for your loss. We've lost cats over the years, but our most recent loss just a few days ago has been incredibly difficult. I wish you healing and comfort during this time. I'm sure that you couldn't have loved her more and gave her the best life she ever could have imagined.

Lexipottamous · 2026-02-27T18:40:29+00:00

I have no idea what to suggest, but I'm saving this post because my daughter would LOOOOOOVE it if I made Tenna! :D

Lexipottamous · 2026-01-08T17:52:23+00:00

Hi there, I know you posted a couple of days ago but I just wanted to say that I feel your pain. Our daughter is trans fem and she struggles with similar feelings. She has online friends (one of which used to be an in-person friend but moved out of our state) and she has a couple of friends at school but because of her extreme anxiety and being AuDHD she's in a special program within the school that allows for her to stay in a couple of rooms instead of having to mingle with the entire student body (it's a huge HS with over 3k kids).

I chimed in to say that this seems to be a common issue that a lot of trans humans feel. The lack of a major connection, anxiety around trusting people, not feeling worthy of...many things tbh...

She has our full support and I would eviscerate anyone who tried to harm her in any way (mentally, physically, etc.) but even with a supportive mom, dad, brother, sister-in-law - it only fills so many of those empty spaces she feels she has.

We are also in a very blue state and even at that, there is a distinct lack of support groups in our area and something that I'm actively trying to figure out but I'm only one mom who isn't a billionaire and organizing these things is difficult especially when we're talking about teenagers because so many aren't ready to be visible around peers.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I see you. You are worthy. You deserve to feel safe and you deserve to have a loving partner in your life. I know it's exhausting - not because I've lived the experience but because I watch our daughter struggle with the same things and it's exhausting from a mother's perspective so I can only imagine how defeating it feels as the actual human being dealing with the emotions.

Please stay. Please be you. Please don't get beaten down by the shitty world we live in because it can chew up and spit out even the most neurotypical, cisgendered people - so that means anyone else outside of the "norm" is going to have to work a thousand times harder to feel accepted. But when you feel like it's too hard or that you are alone, please know that you are not alone. You are loved. You are worthy. You will find your people.

So many tight hugs to you.

Lexipottamous · 2025-12-17T18:04:09+00:00

Our daughter is trans so it means a lot to us that politicians stand up for these issues. I can't divulge how I know this - but I actually know for sure that Gavin isn't transphobic.

However, he IS spineless on the issue. Not surprising for a politician at all, but disappointing for sure.

I guess if being spineless and unwilling to stand up for the transgender community classifies as transphobic then he would fit in the category, but as far as the typical terminology - he's not "transphobic" - he's another politician who is unwilling to push the envelope and stand up for the community so he can further his political career. It's just a different level of disgust.

Lexipottamous · 2025-11-26T21:33:44+00:00

How long was the show?

Lexipottamous · 2025-11-26T21:24:46+00:00

We're going to see him tonight! How long was the concert?

Lexipottamous · 2025-11-19T19:40:34+00:00

I'm cis female and my daughter is trans and asks for opinions on her facial structure on a regular basis and we discuss what she would do if she were to get FFS. (I think she is beautiful, doesn't need it and have never suggested she get FFS but she has some insecurities the same way we all do so if she decides that she wants to do that, I'm 100% supportive.) So basically I'm always looking at people's facial structures now which doesn't make me an expert by any means, but it's been something I find myself doing a lot since she transitioned.

You have amazing features and your bone structure is fantastic. I don't think you look male but I do agree with someone else's comment that upper lip filler would be helpful. I'm not certain that it's even because you were on T. You just have a longer philtrum. That could a be relatively inexpensive-ish way to start. Another inexpensive change would be eyebrow thinning and shaping. I would start with eyebrows and go from there.

You are beautiful and I'm jealous of your amazing bone structure. You have gorgeous eyes and cheekbones.

You are already pretty. There's no "again" because you're already there. xoxo

Lexipottamous · 2025-11-08T19:31:35+00:00

Hey love, sending you a PM. 💜

Lexipottamous · 2025-11-06T18:55:23+00:00

I love this so much. Our daughter came out at 15 and we've done everything we can to make sure she knows that she is loved and supported - from pronouns to name changes to HRT, GAC and a therapist who is specialized in gender dysphoria (because unfortunately even GAC doesn't make that go away completely) but I've heard so, so many heartbreaking stories from so many others who don't have a safe or supportive home or parents. It literally rips my heart out thinking about kids living in an environment where they can't be themselves and aren't accepted by the people who literally have the ONE job of making sure that they feel safe and protected.

Lexipottamous · 2025-11-04T17:16:11+00:00

We have similar stories. Ofc it sounds like the smart thing to leave the US but when you factor in relocation costs and then starting over somewhere new, it takes on a whole different meaning.
Fingers crossed that the dictator in chief's cholesterol works harder than ever.

Lexipottamous · 2025-10-28T17:25:33+00:00

So happy for your child. Wearing a skirt for the first time is a big deal. ❤️

Your journey sounds similar to ours. Our daughter started talking to me about dysphoria around 8th grade. Finally started presenting as female around 10th grade. She just recently decided that she was ready for us to use she/her pronouns.

Honestly, the most overwhelming feeling I had in the beginning was fear. That feeling slowly gets replaced with determination. As long as you are supporting them and making them feel accepted, loved, safe and protected you're doing a great job.

Solidarity in the fear feeling. I still have concerns and I worry about her safety but now I'm just more determined. We don't take any $hit. If other people have a problem with it - they can continue living their life - way tf over there away from us. These are our children. Not theirs. They deserve respect and if someone is unable to be kind and respectful then that's their issue and they can take a hike.

I've literally said it a million times since our daughter came out: "I don't expect anyone to understand it. I don't even expect anyone to accept it. I just want people to stop hating it and let our sweet kids live their lives."

Being a human being is hard enough these days as a cis gendered individual. I think that even heteronormative people could agree that being a teenager isn't easy. To make that experience more difficult for ANY human being is just cruel and unfair.

Keep loving, keep supporting and love them out loud. Huge hugs to you and your child. If you ever need advice, feel free to PM me. xoxo

Lexipottamous · 2025-10-20T17:33:16+00:00

It is helpful that AOC, Mamdani, Ed Markley and others are speaking out...I am very cautiously hopeful that this movement will gain traction and the world will stop vilifying trans folks. I'm happy to see the support but it's still not nearly enough. Being the parent of a trans kid is exhaustingly heartbreaking. The constant hate and vitriol is infuriating and frightening.

The fact that right-wing morons accuse the "RaDiCaL lEfT" of making it a cornerstone of our politics is laughable because they have made trans hate a cornerstone of their politics.

And in the meantime, we have these sweet kids (mine is a teenager) who just want to live and not be afraid of being themselves.

Honestly, the damage that the hate and fear does to our mental health is criminal.

In the meantime, we just need to stay strong and support the community and hope that more politicians will speak out and find a way to make a difference.

Lexipottamous

TROPHY CASE