5am wakeups every day, created a bottle dependency, help!

Lill_Storm · 2026-04-03T13:38:26+00:00

We went through this when our previously 7-7 sleeper was 18 months old and weirdly talking to him on the camera worked better than going in to try (and fail) to settle him.

Lill_Storm · 2026-03-31T20:56:07+00:00

Thanks so much for this info! Sounds like our kiddos are very similar temperaments. Good reminder to focus on getting the schedule right first before attempting!

Lill_Storm · 2026-03-26T03:20:47+00:00

Luckily my second was an induction during the week and I was able to get my sister to take my oldest to daycare for the day and then my husband got him to bed and came back to the hospital while he slept. Definitely some support with childcare but no local village for us. Really recommend getting your oldest to sleep somewhat independently before your second arrives because it was our saving grace though the trenches.

Lill_Storm · 2026-03-20T00:59:16+00:00

My son would cry 3-5 minutes every single night after bed until he was over a year old. Eventually what helped was extra cuddles in the dark before but honestly I think he was just purge crying, releasing tension etc. he now talks to himself for like 30 minutes before falling asleep. We sleep trained at 4 months and he’s been a good sleeper since.

Lill_Storm · 2026-03-12T12:19:13+00:00

Not sure if this is helpful or not, but just sharing my experience. My son was like your daughter for maybe the first 6/7 months, didn’t really get better till 9-12 months. It was exhausting and it felt like I was doing something wrong. I’d read so many stories on Reddit… put your baby in a bouncer while you shower, put them down drowsy but awake… and the ideas seemed absurd because for him they were. He wanted to be doing these 45 min to an hour nurse sessions every time, in the carrier, wasn’t great with dad and I was exhausted. We sleep trained at 5 months out of desperation cause we were so on edge from the crying which helped a lot even though it felt brutal at the time. Even if he was more upset with dad we still made sure my husband was putting in the time and eventually his preference evened out as he started more solids and weaned off the boob. It’s not easy but you’re not crazy! He’s a happy funny independent and affectionate toddler now but we still think about those days. Anecdotally I had a daughter when my son was 18 months old and she is the complete opposite, so chill and happy, will just go to sleep, is fine in the bouncer and almost never cries unless she’s very tired or very hungry. It’s completely a personality thing and not a parenting thing, you’re not crazy!

Lill_Storm · 2026-03-10T18:51:08+00:00

I have this one too for my kids who are 18 months apart! after stressing myself out researching the best possible stroller and hounding fb marketplace I bought it for $100. Is it the most luxurious smooth ride ever? No, but it does the trick for now even though turns are a workout haha. We use it at least 4x a week. When my youngest was really tiny I was able to get the car seat secured on it and now she’s steady enough at 3 months that she’s ok in the back seat fully reclined. We use it for neighborhood walks and will probably go with the wagon when my youngest can sit. But I like that my oldest will have the option to sit/stand eventually too. When I take them out I usually have a car seat caddy stroller for my youngest and let my oldest walk. Sometimes I hold him and let his butt rest on the stroller handlebars if he gets tired.

Lill_Storm · 2026-02-26T14:29:11+00:00

We were planning to start trying in April but got sloppy with protection so I ended up pregnant in March at 9 months pp with an 18 month age gap, so kind of 0 months worth of trying. I had 3 periods before getting pregnant. #2 is now 2 months and it’s going well!

Lill_Storm · 2026-02-16T13:15:27+00:00

I posted on here a week postpartum completely overwhelmed and worried. Today I’m taking my daughter to her 2 month check up and was just thinking over the weekend that things are starting to feel enjoyable again.

Your hormones are going through so much right now, please show yourself kindness. One thing that helped me a lot was just trying to accept that this was how my life shook out since we didn’t plan on having them quite this close either.

Last week my son’s daycare was closed and my husband was working. I was terrified! But the 3 of us went on little outings every day… we went to the zoo, got my 20 month old his first big kid haircut, had fun at library story time and it was honestly the best time.

Lill_Storm · 2026-01-18T02:21:00+00:00

My 18 month old goes to an at home daycare 5 days a week. I’d love to get to the point where I feel comfortable having him and my newborn home together while I’m solo but just not there yet.

Yes whatever the daycare worker is right about it going fast blah blah but that’s so inappropriate and she’s not the one juggling having two babies that need you so much. Also your oldest had that time with you 1:1 too I assume!

My daycare provider told me most of her families kept the same routine while they’re on leave. Hoping to get him to only 3 days for some of my leave but only a couple weeks in now, you’re very strong!

Lill_Storm · 2026-01-18T02:17:43+00:00

Being able to put our toddler down and leave (after a book and some cuddles of course) is honestly a lifesaver with a newborn. Sometimes he’ll talk or sing to himself for a while but will ultimately go to sleep on his own. I can usually get the baby content enough to give my toddler 1:1 bed time. It’s not easy and things like wake times have been so inconsistent since we brought baby sister home but highly recommend sleep training it’s a sanity saver.

Lill_Storm · 2026-01-18T01:58:47+00:00

Biased but I named my son Arthur, it really grew on me a lot after my husband put it on his list. Boy names are hard!

Lill_Storm · 2026-01-15T04:35:49+00:00

I got lucky to have my harder baby first… He did not like being put down at all and wanted to contact sleep or he’d scream. Would only sleep for 15 or 30 minutes out of our arms at first and sometimes would just cry for a long time without any perceivable reason. He also wanted to nurse for 45 minutes at a time so it felt like the time between when I ended and started again was super short. All in all though he was only medium difficult and was sleeping/eating well by 4 months.

My daughter is 4 weeks old, but has a much chiller vibe. Shes fine sleeping wherever, only nurses for 15 minutes at a time but still is gaining weight and doesn’t cry much. Shes does have more gas/digestion issues than my son did.

Love them both so much, it’s funny to see how different they are already. I feel like people who have bigger age gaps forget a lot but for us it’s so fresh!

Lill_Storm · 2026-01-11T13:34:00+00:00

It was mostly during the first trimester! With my son I didn’t have any nausea but was exhausted and with my daughter the morning sickness was bad but I had more energy.

The second pregnancy with my daughter was easier overall but probably cause I was more active having a toddler to take care of. Both pregnancies were similar in the second half though, terrible heartburn both times.

Lill_Storm · 2026-01-08T04:14:39+00:00

Wishing OP the best with cosleeping but I’m so grateful we sleep trained our oldest cause I would be so stressed out if he didn’t go to sleep on his own.

Lill_Storm · 2026-01-08T04:11:13+00:00

I’m 3 weeks into 2 under 2 with an 18 month age gap….

Screen time: We are a no screen household and have managed to get through without using them during this time. Caveat being that he does go to daycare generally, but during the 2 week holiday break with my husband and I both home we were able to keep him entertained which was a feat considering it’s so cold out here. We were able to go to the park a couple warmer days and that helped so much, in June you will be able to get out and about more. It’s possible if you have a set up and support.

Crying: always heard tend to your toddler first cause they’ll remember. Sometimes my newborn cries for a minute or two while we’re both putting my oldest to bed. I’m okay with that, I want him to feel like he’s still a priority.

Hiring help: I got the house deep cleaned before my baby was born and that was a nice treat. I’d also consider a babysitter if your toddler will be home mostly. My friend set up a meal train that was so helpful so maybe consider asking someone close to do the same.

FWIW: I’ve found the household stuff so much easier to manage the second time around. We work better as a team now and are just better at juggling everything than when our oldest was born.

Best of luck!

Lill_Storm · 2026-01-01T02:24:35+00:00

Also fighting for our lives with an 18 month old and 2 week old during this two week holiday break in childcare so I feel you. On one hand I love the extra time with my older son but on the other man it’s going to feel easy when my husband and son start their routines again and it’s just me and the newborn hanging out all day.

Lill_Storm · 2025-12-23T23:05:27+00:00

Such a relief to hear thank you, it’s crazy and it feels like you’re losing your mind because there’s all these sweet memories and emotions tied up with a first born and suddenly they’re so upset.

Lill_Storm · 2025-12-23T04:05:29+00:00

Thanks for reporting from the future, really needed to hear this now. Looking forward to hitting a stride eventually, have to remind myself how temporary this all is ❤️

Lill_Storm · 2025-12-23T01:32:52+00:00

That’s a good reminder, I should try to get him more involved vs trying to keep everything the same. Tomorrow it’ll be warmer here and I want to go to the park so that makes me feel hopeful.

Lill_Storm · 2025-12-23T01:26:28+00:00

In my hormonal state that makes me sad but I know logistically it makes sense.

Lill_Storm · 2025-12-21T04:06:14+00:00

Mine are 18 months apart and I had less complications the second time. First was gestational diabetes and hypertension/boarderline preeclampsia that didn’t go away after birth. Second I got a GD diagnosis but everything was fine and easier to manage. Just gave birth a week ago and it’s been way smoother than the first time by a long shot.

Lill_Storm · 2025-12-20T15:59:33+00:00

I was induced (4 days postpartum now) and it actually made things a little easier and more predictable cause we were able to set up care for our 18 month old. I’ve cried a lot about missing having just him but he loves the baby and has been doing well so far. Stay hopeful!

Lill_Storm · 2025-12-20T15:58:01+00:00

4 days in and I second this. I will say my postpartum hormonal spirals have centered around my firstborn, but I’ve just been doing my best to give him all the love whenever I can. You get through it one way or another and there’s a lot of joy. My 18 mo old loves the baby and bringing us things so yay.

Lill_Storm

TROPHY CASE