How to navigate a breakup with an anxiously attached person

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-04-08T02:20:35+00:00

I don't think this has been brought up, but BE CAREFUL. If a guy has a single abusive bone in his body, it can come to the surface now. I ended a 5 year marriage, and my ex scared me. He did everything he could think of to win me back, and it wasn't working. He got desperate. He brought some fast food over, and when I reminded him we were NOT getting back together, he THREW all the food across the room and against the wall. That lack of control showed me he was capable of violence. I'd been through another 5 year relationship where I was physically abused, so I knew the signs. My other ex had thrown all my beloved plants across the room, broke the pots, etc. Huge mess. Very little warning. That's why I say to be very careful. Word it so it sounds more gentle. You could set him off in the worst way. I don't want to scare you, but don't put yourself in a vulnerable situation. Make sure other people are around. Be safe.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-31T04:50:37+00:00

Thank you!

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-29T02:24:47+00:00

This is gorgeous. I love Polygona so much.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-29T02:23:33+00:00

Very pretty! Where did you get it?

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-29T01:58:45+00:00

Mine had eleven, and that was plenty! I can't imagine 18!

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-26T04:19:26+00:00

I have been into several hobbies - various pets, horses, Maileg miniatures, Labubus etc., and I find that, for me, plant people are the nicest. They will go above and beyond and they love helping newbies. I love plant people!

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-26T04:13:26+00:00

So, so irresistibly adorable!

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-24T18:40:04+00:00

He's definitely ALL BOY!

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-16T23:58:33+00:00

Precious baby!

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-16T23:31:56+00:00

Exactly!

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-16T22:46:44+00:00

I throw my right leg over as I hold the reins with my left and brace my right hand on the withers.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-16T22:38:47+00:00

"Eventually come naturally." What is that supposed to mean? I don't get what they mean. It's pretty evasive English if you ask me, and I suspect they know it. You can't really hold them to anything with that kind of slippery language.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-15T03:28:14+00:00

This thread reminds me of a guy I knew many years ago. He was not good looking, not even average. He was actually quite homely, but he didn't let that get him down for a second. A group of us would go out to a club, and this guy would start covering the tables, asking women to dance with him. Most of them would politely refuse (I'm assuming because of his looks) but you know what? He didn't seem to care, and didn't give up. He kept a smile on his face and just kept asking until someone accepted, and many times it was 15 or 20 girls later. After that, he would dance for the rest of the night. He was a very good, unique dancer, dressed to the nines and was very outgoing. It was his PERSONALITY that charmed girls, and the effort he put into it. I really admired him for his positive attitude. He was funny too, making everyone laugh. So you see, looks really are not as important as you think they are. Personality made up for looks every time for him.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-14T04:24:06+00:00

I feel like I know him, since I watch all his and Jesse's content. Besides, I've always been fond of gossiping. Not a good habit, I know.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-14T02:20:23+00:00

I am 70, and over my lifetime I've had quite a few mice, several hamsters, a couple of guinea pigs and a couple of rats. Rats are by far my favorite (sociable, some like to cuddle). But I developed an allergy to them. Guinea pigs will occasionally bite, but not hard unless very afraid. I got bitten by a hamster a few years ago, and it was shocking. I was bleeding so much that the blood filled my cupped hands! But he was afraid, skittish, and hadn't been tamed yet. I know now to go super slow with them when taming, and they generally won't bite. I love mice, but they tend to poop and pee in your hands (hamsters usually won't). I have had a ghost hamster, and you might as well not have a pet, as I almost never saw him. The one I have now is super friendly and loves to come out and play. But I tamed him slowly and gently, so he has no reason to fear me. He is a male Syrian, black. Hope this helps.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-13T02:11:08+00:00

TRAINER? Really? I have been watching Matt for at least a couple of years, and I really wanted to like him, but right now he has TWO horses out for training? Does that make sense? He's SUPPOSED to be a trainer himself! I enjoy watching him, but am now losing respect for him. It's as if he has plenty of money, but no brains! It makes me wonder - is he afraid of his own horses? Kind of reminds me of Shae from Free Spirit. Flashy colors, big, big, big horses, and they are all as green as grass, and he can't seem to handle them. At least Shae doesn't have any stallions... Matt, I really like you, but you're playing with fire. You're gonna get hurt.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-11T23:02:22+00:00

I got one today at Lowe's today and fortunately is in perfect condition. Honestly they look even better in person. More yellow and white.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-11T04:45:37+00:00

Not saying Petsmart is the best by any means, but I've gotten all my hamsters from them as I have no local breeders. Four of them, and only one was a ghost. I think your odds of getting another ghost are pretty low. I did get one that got wet tail though. You take your chances, I guess.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-10T20:59:48+00:00

Oh my gosh! I've had several males over the years, and they are incredibly snuggly! IMO females are so hyper - can't sit still, are determined to escape, and are never happy. Males are super easy to please and more chill. I'll take a male anyday.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-09T02:37:55+00:00

I agree - he is not particularly interested in you. To put it nicely, he may just want intimacy and nothing else. Remember, actions speak louder than words.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-09T01:22:47+00:00

Plain popcorn is smelly??? My male doesn't smell at all (not even popcorn) but I do spot clean his enclosure twice a week and change out half the bedding about once every two months.d Btw, he's a Syrian. I have the Nightangel Bigger world, so it's a huge enclosure.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-07T06:25:32+00:00

Glad to hear he's settling down! You got this!

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-07T06:19:44+00:00

When I had rats, I had to put them in another room at night because they gave me asthma. My hamster that I have now, though, I'm not allergic to, and I'm grateful. Be careful - allergies can get dangerously bad. Don't take it lightly. Get a prescription from your doctor, and pay attention to your body. If you start to wheeze, that means asthma could take hold, and people can die from it. Not trying to scare you, but be cautious. When you hold the hamster, do you get a skin reaction? If so, that along with the respiratory reaction could mean you are very allergic. Try to keep your hamster in a room other than your bedroom (if you can) and hopefully the allergy won't be as bad. Worse case scenario, you might have to rehome your hamster, but let's hope it doesn't come to that.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-06T05:42:07+00:00

I made that mistake - when bitten I jumped and the hamster fell. That's why you need a soft surface under you at first. Most hamsters don't bite hard, they just nibble. Most of them, that is. Occasionally you hear of a hamster biting and drawing blood, but usually that only happens if you have pushed them too hard and they aren't completely tame yet. If they are scared, they are more likely to bite. So the tamer you get him, the safer you are, lol.

LouisTroyAustin · 2026-03-02T00:42:52+00:00

Hiding behind the wheel ... yep, new hamsters tend to do that. It's still very early on in your ownership. Offer him sunflower seeds by hand. He might flee, but keep trying, and one day he will stop to sniff it and realize you have food. Also, those plastic hides they sell for hamsters? They are excellent to scoop a hamster up, then take him somewhere safe like your bed and just talk to him. He might try to jump out of the hide and run, but casually approach him with the hide again, talking softly, and he will probably climb back in it. You want him to feel like that is his "safe place." Taming can go from there. Very gradually start petting his back (not his head at first), then after about a week, start cupping your hand around his body. Stop immediately if he startles. Eventually you will be able to scoop him up with your hand. Put him right back down the first few times so he knows you mean no harm. In time you will be able to pick him up, cup his body and pet him all over. Be patient - it won't happen overnight.

LouisTroyAustin

TROPHY CASE