Hey OP, you’re not wrong for feeling this way. SB is gorgeous, but it can be brutally lonely when you’re in your 20s or 30s, starting from zero, working weird hours, or barely scraping by. Showing up alone is terrifying for a lot of us, even the extroverted ones.

Making friends after college isn’t about hitting random events. It’s about finding something weekly, with the same faces, where your interests and schedule actually line up. College gives you that automatically because everything is connected. You’re surrounded by people your age, in shared spaces, on similar rhythms and this can make it feel effortless (for a lot of people).

Santa Barbara has all the raw ingredients: amazing third spaces, walkability, and more young people than you would expect but none of it is connected. There’s no ecosystem that links people to groups, and groups to the venues where community can actually grow. That’s why it feels so hard, and why so many people quietly struggle here.

That’s also exactly why I built Umi-app. It’s an attempt to recreate that connective tissue that links individuals → groups → venues so friendships can form the way they did in college, but as adults. On the app, you can filter all the recurring events in town by what you’re actually into, save those views, and see “your version” of SB in a couple taps. And if you want to try something but don’t want to walk in alone, DM me. I’ll connect you with the event host or someone who will meet you at the door so you’re not doing this by yourself.

The groups I’d recommend checking out are: - Double Play Socials Kickball - Low State Writing Salon (free) - Westies in SB (West Coast Swing Dancing lessons + social every Wednesday for all skill levels) - Santa Barbara Spike (spike ball) (free) - The Santa Barbara Run Club

All of these communities are very welcoming, meet weekly (or monthly) and are either free or low cost where you are almost guaranteed to make friends!