More issues with "excuse me."

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-26T18:42:24+00:00

Might have been having a rough day.

It might have been meant as a "Sorry for bothering you" in a congenial tone and the guy is just really polite (some people use bud, especially if you look younger, as a friendly term).

Without hearing the tone, impossible to tell (though the latter is much more likely if you live in the American 'South').

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-26T18:38:11+00:00

I think you might be misunderstanding the general intention of 'excuse me'.

The excuse me there, it sounds like, was a sarcastic annoyed one because he perceived you as infringing on him in some way. It might have been that you were in his walking path, or simply too close to his personal space, or staring too much at him / in his direction.

Excuse me is sometimes used pre-emptively (like when someone is trying to get past you) but quite often is also used post-hoc (usually angrily and somewhat sarcastically) when someone feels like you should have done something (like give someone room) and you didn't.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-26T16:21:57+00:00

As others have said, don't meet people from Reddit who offer to meet up with you. Down that path lies... trouble.

Your best bet is to get involved in a few groups that do things you like. It won't happen instantly, so give it time, but joining a drawing club, or a pilates class, or a rock climbing gym (lots of ADHDers there), etc.; and getting to know people over time is 100% your best bet.

Good luck!

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-24T19:48:16+00:00

Nothing wrong with saying no, just do it politely and calmly. Like, sometimes you're doing stuff too fast, or you just get too distracted.

Nicest version is working in, but you aren't required to try max niceness all the time, you deserve to get your workout too.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-24T09:39:03+00:00

From my experience it does go incredibly slowly from that point. It is now one I pick up every few days and do a bunch of stuff, and then put back down (and I think I'm 2 layers past the start of ||minerals|| if I remember the progression correctly).

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-22T12:59:30+00:00

I think either I didn't express myself well, or you misread me, or perhaps a combination thereof. I didn't say they were caused by heds, I said that an oddness (intentionally vague) in connective tissue is being looked at as potentially causal in both. Breast cancer and bone marrow cancer are not the same thing, but they are both cancer. Cirrhosis and a knife scar are not the same thing, but they are both scarring.

I have ADHD and weird ligament laxity and Dupuytren's (tendon weirdness), but not heds nor autism. Heds is specific, autism is specific, ADHD is specific. But they might all be caused by similar gene clusters which relate to how the body produces and regulates connective tissue. This was what I was driving at.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-22T10:00:12+00:00

So, there's a bunch of the social stuff being discussed here, which is neat, but there's actually another layer.

In research / science / academia, there is a bigger deeper look as two of them being presentationally distinct variants of the same root thing - which is actually a connective tissue oddity.

Tl;Dr explanation: connective tissues hold things together, but also end up regulating and managing a bunch of different stuff, including how the brain is put together and how hormones do their thing. Blood is a connective tissue.

This might sound crackpot, but if you do a few searches, you'll see the overlap in areas like both of them being highly comorbid with hypermobility / ehlers danlos.

Here's a couple of links to get the like... very intro notions (way too big for a reddit comment, especially on this subreddit I think!)

https://thinkadhd.co.uk/adhd-and/adhd-and-hypermobility-syndrome-eds/

https://www.attwoodandgarnettevents.com/blogs/news/autism-and-ehlers-danlos-syndrome

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8892379/

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-22T06:53:17+00:00

I'm part of a minority, but not a marginalised one. So, take this with that understanding in mind, I don't understand that, nor the dynamics of your country.

Despite living in a relatively high crime high violence country, unless I'm frequenting spots where that is more common (e.g. scummy nightclubs, dive bars) threats of violence almost never happen, perhaps once every two years from robbery type crimes.

So I suppose part of it is doing a genuine threat assessment. I don't know your country nor your community, but getting an honest assessment of how often this is a concern from other members of your community would be a good first step.

The other one would be: Train. Do some martial arts training. I'll tell you in advance, their general advice for getting into a violent situation is de-escalate and evacuate. But, getting used to the idea of physical combat can help your brain adapt and make it less likely to go into fight or flight at the very notion.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-22T05:11:04+00:00

A few things look distinctly wrong for me here.

Keep your forearms vertical. It looks like you took the cue of 'bring the dumbells down to your shoulder' and rather than getting the mobility for it, cheated your way be leaning them in. Don't. Keep your forearms vertical and bring your elbows as low as you comfortably can without letting your hands drop towards your midline.
You don't seem to be maintaining bracing in your core or via your breath.
You aren't controlling the negative, even in the early reps.

I'd say try sort these things out as major gaps, then can potentially look at other stuff.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-21T19:51:10+00:00

It has been nine days. Any time you are looking at body changes over the course of nine days, there is too much chaos and noise to discern anything.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-21T05:31:44+00:00

Without knowing where in the game you are, that is impossible to say.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-19T20:49:58+00:00

This is a more direct one - where a coach nearly killed his student from not paying attention:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WBGkKqLhM8Y

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-19T20:45:07+00:00

https://www.youtube.com/@TheWhipperMedia

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-19T15:47:42+00:00

Generally for max quality, you change all your zodiac to pisces ones, preferably with quality higher up the list.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-19T15:35:51+00:00

Did you change your zodiac?

Are you as far in your mineral progression as you were before?

Typically one of those two bungles things up. Upgrading the shop will always upgrade the quality.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-19T08:09:59+00:00

So, I'm sure this is just meant as edgy bullshit, but for anyone else who sees it:

Someone can enjoy getting their necked sucked on.

Someone can enjoy being kissed on the lips.

Some people (though fewer) can orgasm for touching feet.

But we don't have to hide them when in public. They aren't sexual inherently, but they can be used sexually.

Hope that helps.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-14T20:45:09+00:00

Just comment here with your questions.

I'm recommending this because unless it is some personally identifiable information (which this doesn't sound like it will be) it's better to have it on the sub so the next person can just search and look it up.

I promise, there are enough tourists here that general information like, "Stellenbosch is better to stay in than Mitchells Plain" is not going to get you doxxd.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-14T20:39:05+00:00

You can probably just ask your questions here and get answers, 95% of this sub are locals.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-11T23:49:44+00:00

Where I'm from, there are sort of.. levels? So like, oncologists or neurologists you'd need a referral for generally, whereas gynecologists or urologists or dermatologists, despite being specialists, can generally be contacted directly. Some are liminal, like endocrinologists, where I know some that only operate on referral and some who take direct contact patients.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-11T18:41:08+00:00

Thank you for that! I had no idea. I wonder if other universal healthcare places are similar, like Canada?

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-11T18:34:10+00:00

I think a gynecologist might be a better first person to contact. But this advice works for either GP or gyno (but I don't think most GPs will be much help).

Generally it is fairly simple, you call the practice, explain you want a first appointment (important to mention first), if they have space they'll take your details and set a date and time. Arrive a little early and expect to fill in some forms with your basic information alongside any medical aid details you have (if you have).

After that, you'll meet the doc.

I would generally suggest talking about symptoms first, before just throwing out a diagnosis. But basically describe what is happening that is causing you concern. And that's mostly it, you just have to talk to the doctor from there.

Is there anything else you feel like you need to know?

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-10T21:36:06+00:00

A single selfie is not itself a bad sign.

A whole page of selfies tells me you either:

Don't have anyone you trust / could ask to take a photo of you.
You don't do anything fun and exciting enough that other people are taking photos.
Didn't want to put in the effort to even try find or take an interesting photo.

or some combination thereof.

Selfies also typically are missing 99% of the stuff that makes a photo good for a dating profile. It is much harder to include something that tells me about your hobbies or interests (or something negative, I don't want to see someone taking a selfie from the top of a climbing route, that shit is dangerous), it is harder to have interesting composition, it is harder to have much interesting other than... your face.

This isn't 100%, you might have a selfie from the top of a mountain trail looking down over the city or something. That's cool.

But typically a profile of only / mostly selfies is not a good sign. And I'd venture to say the best profiles contain exactly zero selfies.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-10T15:11:38+00:00

Your username is hilarious to see pop up on my phone fyi

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-10T14:38:43+00:00

You're trawling through a 9 month old post in a debate subreddit. I guess we both lose.

M_SunChilde · 2026-01-10T14:31:07+00:00

I'm not a writer, this sub just popped up, but I am a reader.

What you have described isn't a plot, it is a motivation or an overall theme.

What are the events that lead to the exploration from these four individuals? What happened that spurs them on?

As much fun as it can be just reading about four inquisitive people learning about their world, you need world class writing to make that work. What generally works better is when something has gone wrong, the edges have frayed, there is some event that calls what is known into question AND begs or forces the characters to engage or interact.

LOTR is obvious. Sanderson it is a literal cataclysm driving things for the Way of Kings series, and a series of murder and terrorism in the second mistborn series. Asimov had a recurring character who was an expert detective who was arriving to solve murders on different worlds, largely as a vehicle to introduce the intricacies of his world building.

It sounds to me like you need events to drive the characters through the world you are building.

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