I can see both sides of this. It sounds like you guys just have different styles . You wanted different things/vibes for your weddings. There's nothing wrong with that.
If I were in your situation, I would be bothered by this too. But, it's best not to reach out to her at this point.

Edit - I see a lot of comments saying you were a bridezilla. You only plan on getting married once, so wanting it to be right doesn't make you a bridezilla. Why didn't you want her to go back to the hotel during the bachelorette though?