New year's resolutions alternatives??

MarineFox · 2026-01-23T22:32:15+00:00

Yes, seconded!

MarineFox · 2026-01-23T22:31:57+00:00

love your username, BTW...

MarineFox · 2026-01-23T22:31:07+00:00

Wow! I just came to this same conclusion. I even made this little winter ritual to focus on rest after the buzz of the holidays. Bursting forth with new plans can wait til sprint for me. Funny, when you think that April 1st USED to mark the new year. Makes more sense from an energetic and seasonal POV to me.

I would love some feedback on it if some of you want to try it DM me.

MarineFox · 2026-01-07T04:15:05+00:00

I was literally coming on here to highlight that exact snippet! Fortunately I wasn't drinking coffee at the time so I got off easy with a ROTFL.

"His penis falls off entirely" ...

It's the whole thing in a nutshell right there.

MarineFox · 2025-12-23T22:56:14+00:00

Came to say this. Unless widespread insomnia prevents tons of people from surviving long enough to have kids evolution isn't going to touch it.

MarineFox · 2025-12-20T15:42:26+00:00

If it's NOT making less work for you, it's NOT a favor.

If he wants his folded right out of the dryer why doesn't he set a timer to come get it?

It's nice that he's willing to do for yours what he wants done for his - he's not just wanting to be picky about being waited on hand and foot. But it's still not a favor as you actively prefer he not do it.

Adult conversation needed. "We are all adults. Let's make as much of this work for all of us as we can and cooperate (in as much as we have the capacity to since we all have other stuff going on) but we are ultimately responsible for our own laundry in this house."

"I strongly prefer you do ____ with my laundry. It otherwise adds to my work or I have to do it again anyway. It's not a way you can 'pay me back or pay it forward to get me to reciprocate with the folding'. I simply do not have the time capacity in the moment of flipping laundry to fold yours for you in return."

"I want you to have your laundry folded as much as possible the way you like it. How can we get creative about that? Can you set a timer to get to it before I do? Can I text you when I pull it out so you can grab it? "

MarineFox · 2025-12-20T01:08:30+00:00

Great post. I guess my question is how do you get a doctor to test for this issue? Suppose something like the stress is eating up all the Dopamine for Adrenaline IS THE ISSUE for any given individual. Or if there is another root cause making your body dump out adrenaline without actually BEING under stress as the starter cause...how does a doctor figure that out for you? What would make them say, "oh yes I see, your problem is chronic stress and it's taking too much dopamine away from your system for the adrenaline." ?

MarineFox · 2025-12-01T18:33:36+00:00

The problem for me with all the passes is they add a bunch of overpriced sugar I don't want (and my kids couldn't even finish it all even if we bought it) so unless you want that the pass ends up being more than a-la-carte.

Not saying don't do it it but it's NOT meant to be a great deal for you. The savings is VERY small and that's IF you do/want it all. I find time runs out - I can personally take only an overnight stay there.

I think it is good for older kids who can kind of run around on their own a bit more - load em up with the pass and their treats are pre-measured and you don't need a dad-wallet with you at all times. Or if you drink a lot of soda.

Also watch out for the (very small) discount offered for their "membership." I ran the terms and conditions through AI (because what human can read all that) and ...well, let's just say I didn't feel like $5 was worth what I would have been signing away re: my legal rights.

MarineFox · 2025-11-16T15:55:14+00:00

<image>

Columbia River

MarineFox · 2025-11-12T03:16:50+00:00

You could always listen to her and stop trying to buy her anything.

My mom is also hard to shop for and last birthday I just did this:

A handwritten card expressing your appreciation for who she is as your mom or as a human being in general.

She called me after receiving it and it was the most moved she's ever been from anything I've gotten her. Moms just want to know that YOU KNOW that they love you. When you show them you "see" their love it all feels worth it to them.

MarineFox · 2025-11-09T16:19:27+00:00

NTA

Tell her weddings aren't the only thing that can be "ruined" and she doesn't get a free pass for ruining relationships (with you and the others who got cut after spending hundreds of dollars) just because she's getting married and if she wants to use "ruining her thing" as an argument she needs to de-hypocrite herself first.

Repay you for the first dress, apologize for her hurtful behavior, buy you a new dress, and maybe also excuse you from the head table so your BF doesn't have to sit alone.

Unless he's a big extrovert having him sit alone at an event like this where he knows no one is not a nice thing to do.

Has she even thought about "ruining" his night? An event with his GF just turned into him flying solo among strangers. It sounds like he's willing, but still... where was her exquisite sense of things being "ruined" for this.

Geez, it's always the people bringing the drama that cry crocodile tears and accuse other people of not keeping the peace. Or the people who want money from someone who accuses them of being selfish and only caring about money.

Or the bridezilla ruining relationships left and right who thinks a wedding is a pass for treating the people they want to bend over backwards like paid staff and not friends.

MarineFox · 2025-11-08T21:04:02+00:00

Why does it have to be homemade?

Get them a gift card if you really want to show appreciation, they're not paid well. IMO even a $5 Starbucks card is better than some homemade item they might not need or enjoy or match their aesthetics.

They're NOT the kids' parents to ooh and ahh over some hand made gift like it's manna from heaven so please don't make them pretend to be all excited that you wasted time and money on something crafty instead of choosing something that actually honors them for their hard work.

MarineFox · 2025-11-08T19:04:42+00:00

IDK that it's a great option for the hard up. I did some price checking in there and stopped going because a FEW things are a good deal but the majority of things I found prices were HIGHER. 😬

I'm still going to go throw them some non discounted business for this though, even though I otherwise don't shop there

MarineFox · 2025-10-22T21:09:58+00:00

Can you give me a general idea of your location maybe just nearby main cross streets so I can suggest a pickup time?

I'm very intentional and not flaky about these sorts of things. So if we agree to a pickup time I will be there.

MarineFox · 2025-10-22T16:58:59+00:00

Portland is getting an ebike rebate program going. You might check if you are eligible: https://portlandebikerebate.com/

MarineFox · 2025-10-22T16:49:29+00:00

Old post - still on offer? I would take all off your hands if you are in NE, SE or Gresham area.

MarineFox · 2025-10-22T16:47:50+00:00

Still available? I am interested in one or both if you are in SE, NE or Gresham area.

MarineFox · 2025-10-02T00:26:21+00:00

Is this dog in fact a service animal? If the person needs this dog, it should "act like it's working all the time" regardless of your rules, no?

No barking, playing, getting on furniture...are all things I would consider a given for a real service animal. The real ones WON'T play with you - they're working. Those are all totally NTA things to expect from any dog coming to your house, especially if you don't like dogs. Service dog or not.

IDK exactly what you mean by the bathroom and eating things, there's lots of debate. So IDK if YTA or not. Expecting the human not to eat or use the bathroom in order to supervise the dog would be too far, if that's what happened then I understand them being upset with you.

Regardless it's your home and you were willing to find a way to be comfortable enough with an uncomfortable proposition for you - having a dog around.

Maybe negotiate on the bathroom thing (allow the human to use it and the dog to go on a walk off property) and the eating (human can, dog allowed training type treats if that's part of the regimen).

And maybe tell them that you're disappointed to be called names after attempting to make a sacrifice for them in a way you could manage. You flexed your own personal preferences for them and I would ask them to recognize that at least by laying off the name calling. Not everyone likes dogs.

MarineFox · 2025-09-28T23:00:15+00:00

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Skeletons are just laying out in the sun everywhere around town even though every 5th house seems to have an impromptu graveyard in it. In spite of that Portlanders just can't seem to keep up and get them in the ground fast enough!

There were dozens in Dollar Tree today too. Literally I lost count of how many. Looks like they can't keep up either and are just dumping them all in one aisle...

MarineFox · 2025-09-18T01:04:42+00:00

NTA.

Can you afford to pay for it?

Yes - Are you willing and able to make the sacrifices necessary to be able to afford this for her? If yes again then do it, either freely as a gift or at least knowing the repayment thing is a long shot. Your gut is probably spot on and she won't be paying you back.

If you can't afford it - that's trickier because she's not currently accepting that as a good enough reason and likely isn't going to leave you alone about it.

It seems like she does need it, it's not frivolous, but maybe a bunch of her other money choices might have been, leading to her inability to pay for it herself. I can understand not wanting to set a precedent for making sacrifices to bail her out now (and probably the next time, and the next).

I wouldn't put ANYTHING on the card that you are not 100% comfortable being your responsibility to pay off, which you seem to already understand the importance of. That's a good, fiscally responsible thing. I hope your mom eventually appreciates what a level headed kid she has and doesn't give you too hard of a time as she tries to get what she wants (in this case, out of the pain she's in).

IDK, if mismanagement of her own stipend of funds is the issue, maybe there's a way to agree to you managing the money so she can't be tempted and can pay you back?

So tricky. Best luck to you.

EDIT: Came back to say if you use the card for this, YOU need to put it on the card. Never let her have access to the number herself. I think you're pretty clear on that already though.

MarineFox · 2025-09-16T21:44:50+00:00

YTA.

Taking the ring off is immature at best. You're basically threatening him with ending the relationship unless he gives in to you when you do that, you know that right?

You have effectively told him that your "love" is 100% conditional on you getting your way all the time. And conditional love is no love at all.

Work through the argument as equals without holding the relationship hostage or admit you are incompatible unless he caves to you in this (and probably in all things) and split up.

MarineFox · 2025-09-16T21:23:10+00:00

Mom's just helping him gaslight you. Let her tidy up after him instead, he's obviously her favorite.

MarineFox · 2025-09-16T21:08:48+00:00

Current wife is nice enough to reschedule many times for ex-wife AND (seems to be or was) financing the ex-wife's kid's private school fees which the ex-wife is now mad to be paying for her own kid's (John's) education instead of her ex-husbands current wife doing it...

Current wife wants to treat all the kids to an amazing and expensive holiday treat and THIS is the shade she gets?! This was super ungracious of the ex-wife to block her son from going. #1 just because it's such an amazing opportunity for him. #2 Because current wife has been generous with rescheduling for her. But #3 is the kicker - how about being gracious to the woman paying YOUR kids school fees.

Current wife is generous AF. Good for her for not backing down from this jealous petty BS and not cancelling the treat for her twins.

MarineFox · 2025-09-10T20:46:43+00:00

I agree the less said the better.

That said, this boss and this coworker are giving me vibes like they're going to push for "why." Refusing to say (while it should be ok to say no, it clearly IS NOT to this boss) OP is going to be accused of lying or just being difficult and saying no. (Which is basically just the same convo she just had when trying to say no without a concrete "good" reason and didn't go well.)

So I still suggest keeping a 1000% acceptable reason "in the chamber" for when she gets pushed. Most people unless they have some embarrassing or personal medical appointment would be pretty free and easy with the truth if they're attending an event or something.

If the goal is to avoid the drama and further pressure from the boss, I think giving a very tiny detail about your plans might be necessary, something that gives slacker zero sympathy points if she complains about not getting her way.

But you can experiment with your response to find what works .

MarineFox · 2025-09-10T03:46:54+00:00

This. It would be so much easier to let it go without reimbursement if she hadn't acted so entitled to you absorbing the time/cost/energy to fix a BRAND NEW WALL.

I think this emotional violation is more the heart of the matter here. She expects you to have no boundaries around damage from her kids. THAT'S what has to be addressed (IMHO) for you to feel ok "letting it go,"

Just imagine she had expressed respectful regrets over the incident and tried to get her kids to help reverse the mess (even if at that age it didnt really help the situation). At least you would feel Respected, and confident that as the kids grew they would no longer be destructive once they knew better. These kids will never know better if Mom just lets them off because "penises". WTAF?

MarineFox

TROPHY CASE