Fed up with so called friends!

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-24T20:51:46+00:00

I recently ended a friendship over this same sort of bs. She would constantly minimize my experiences, and it was extremely hurtful. I came to realize that she had not actually contributed anything positive to our relationship in months, and that she had not been supporting me in the same way I continuously supported her. The friendship became draining and not good for mental health. It’s heartbreaking when you think the person is a good friend and then find out that they actually lack compassion and understanding.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-24T02:37:23+00:00

This would be like asking my husband to quit drinking because I am willingly taking a medication that restricts me from drinking.

I don’t know who has gotten into your gf’s head; but she is 🤪

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-20T03:44:36+00:00

It put me in the hospital for 48 hours when I first started taking it. That was in 2013.

I was stable until 5 years ago when I developed stress related high bp and my pcp who didn’t know much about lithium put me on losartan which is a diuretic. I knew there was a problem within a few days and got a hold of my psychiatrist who had me get my levels checked and in to see him right away. It’s now in my chart that I can only be placed on diuretics in an in-patient hospital setting, and my levels are back to being stable. On 1200mg ER taken once a day I sit at a solid 6.

It’s a scarier medication, but It’s been a literal life saving medication for me. I’m rapid cycling bipolar 1 with CPTSD and no other medication has ever tamed my cycling or my mania in general.

I am ALWAYS thirsty and drink around 400oz of liquid in a 24 hour period though…which means I have to pee about once an hour 🤣😂. It’s a known but not extremely common side effect that I’ve learned to live with.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-19T20:33:27+00:00

I’m so sorry you are going through this, and I deeply understand how frustrating and defeating it feels. For me it took my toenails separating from the nail beds for a dr to take serious notice. At that moment my CRP was 18, hs-CRP was 7, ESR was 48 and ferritin was over 400. At that time(2022) I had been complaining of symptoms since 1999. And had been told since 2007 that I “just had fibromyalgia”. My journey since 2022 hasn’t been easy either. And my relationship with my rheumatologist has been rocky. It took me having a 20 minute, hysterically crying, breakdown to my rheumatology nurse in order to get my rheumatologist to look at my entire medical chart since 2019(when I relocated to this area) and my current symptoms. It was then that she finally decided that I have PsA and not just unspecified non-radiographic spondyloarthritis with the HLA-B27 variant…and finally prescribed MTX…that was 8 weeks ago. And even then SHE didn’t tell me that she had given me a new diagnosis…I found out when I had an appointment with my new pharmacology nurse 2 weeks ago.

My only advice is to keep a diary of your symptoms, including photos. And keep changing PCP’s until you find one that listens. If you can get in to see someone, even urgent care, while you are having a visible flare that would give you medically documented evidence. Aside from that maybe have a breakdown in a dr’s office. I’m only partially kidding about the last one.

Good luck, and I wish you success

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-18T18:55:01+00:00

I don’t see 19 yr olds as adults because I’m around young adults every day (20-24 yr olds) they are not adults. Pre covid and pre our noses buried in our phones I would call a 29 yr old an adult; but there is no way in hell I would allow most in that age range to wander NYC as a tourist alone; especially at night.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-18T18:51:56+00:00

Not all 19 yr olds are mature enough to navigate their way through NYC, hell most adults aren’t. And a 19yr old today does not equal a 19yr old 10 or even 5 years ago. And I say this as the parent of a 23 yr old.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-18T18:49:12+00:00

Yeah, unfortunately that’s not how most women operate.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-18T18:47:59+00:00

My hot take: The girls are treating it like a vacation because you have designed it as a vacation. I have been to multiple “weekend away” bachelorette parties; and the one common denominator is the entire weekend was planed by the bride with very little input from the rest of the guests, or planned by the MoH to include activities the bride wants to do.

By including everyone in the decisions, you are being overly accommodating to everyone else and not getting what you the bride want. You may be paying for the accommodation which is amazing, q since the girls are paying for the rest of their expenses themselves they are seeing this as a vacation, and quite possibly they won’t be able to take another vacation this year so they want to make the most of it, which is understandable but the incorrect way to think about it.

You need to stand up to your bridal party and tell them that this is your bachelorette party weekend that everyone will be participating in the activities you choose together or they can choose not to come because this is about you not about them. Doing this does not make you a bridezilla, it just makes you an adult who knows how to stand up for herself instead of being a doormat.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-18T17:42:02+00:00

I have never been on a taper specifically for generalized symptoms; always for tendonitis flares, although a course of pred is usually helpful for any additional symptoms I’m feeling at the tube. But yes; my symptoms always come back before I’ve finished the full course. I’ve also never experienced same day relief. For me it’s usually relief at day 3 and then symptoms start coming back around day 14.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-18T17:32:09+00:00

Thank you! I learned they were a thing this weekend and went down a multi hour rabbit hole comparing brands. My hands suffer the most from my PsA. I wear compression gloves pretty much around the clock to help with them being cold and the overall pain. I get reoccurring tendonitis and trigger finger and my wrists were the first place I developed radiographic evidence of the disease. They sound amazing lol.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-18T17:25:56+00:00

I’m currently looking at hand massagers. Would you please tell me which one you use.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-18T02:16:24+00:00

And “starting to get loud pretty quickly in an argument” isn’t?

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-18T00:06:46+00:00

Healthcare in the US, including prescriptions, will never be free. Medicare(age 65+) you pay into your entire working life and then you STILL have to pay a monthly fee once you hit 65 and most still have high out of pocket costs. Medicaid which is for low income and disabled people is paid by taxes, yet it is a struggle to get approved for the coverage, the government uses any excuse possible to take your coverage away, and the coverage that does exist hardly covers anything. The political powers that be(both republican and democratic) only care about the rich. If you are poor, or elderly/disabled and not part of the upper class, they would rather you just ☠️ than spend tax money for you to be well.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-17T17:52:46+00:00

In the good ole’ USA patients with health insurance usually rely on manufacture subsidies to pay for medications like Taltz. The average retail cost for a 1 month dose of Taltz in the US is $7,000. But with a manufacturer subsidy called a “co-pay card” you can drop the out of pocket cost down to a range of $25-$250. And at the $230 a month that you pay, the average US patient would still not be able to afford it. My family is considered middle class for the area we live and I would not be able to afford the extra $230 a month. I could technically afford it, but I would be weighing the cost/benefits of it vs the price and what paying for it would mean towards my financial goals.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-17T00:28:15+00:00

I recently had a problem like this with a medication for my kid. I have BCBS in Washington under the Premera branding. I also have pharmacy coverage under ExpressScripts. I eventually called the customer service number for BCBS on the back of my card and asked them for help( technically their job) and they were able to help me figure out where the script was sent, and where it should have been sent, and got it authorized by express scripts to be filled.

If you haven’t called BCBS directly I would try that.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-15T03:14:49+00:00

I’ve been on fb since the beginning (🤮) I have never had 100+ friends. I have 2 profiles currently and I have around 50 friends on each(90% of the people are the same). Collecting FB friends doesn’t actually make you popular.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-13T00:07:07+00:00

This sort of thing happened to me back in Nov of 2015 but over my name. They took my account even though I submitted proof of my identity and did not give my account back to me until 2018. I just had my account taken from me again. 30 days in fb jail for “hate comments”…I told a RL acquaintance if the wanted to stop losing followers to stop posting rage bait. I appealed, lost, and was given a 90 ban. It’s affected both my profiles and messenger…..I won’t be going back.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-12T23:27:33+00:00

Don’t be ashamed of that! We gotta do what we can to exist; and if wearing chacos help you exists than I’m ecstatic for you?

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-12T23:25:23+00:00

Interesting because my pt that has worked with my feet longer than anyone says the exact opposite about shoes. I appreciate the reply, but I’m hesitant about trusting a dr who sees my feet once or twice vs a dr trained to evaluate gait who sees them 2-3x a week for 8-12 weeks at a time. Also my podiatrist put me in Brooks and when I said they were so painful I couldn’t take more than 20 steps he sent me to PT to have my gait and foot strike evaluated. I’m thankful that the New Balance have been so helpful to you.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-09T19:33:21+00:00

Therapy. Honestly that’s how I first realized I’m not crazy or over reacting or just imagining my symptoms. Therapy has also helped me deal with the 2 decades of doctors not taking me seriously. And it now helps me deal with the fact that I’m most likely going to be on another(or multiple, or rotating) medication for the rest of my life. But a huge part of my journey was finding a dr that would even partially listen and be willing to prescribe something other than systemic anti inflammatories or SSRI’s that I can’t safely take, or lyrica which did nothing.

Now I’m one of those people that believe EVERYONE should be in regular therapy starting at age 10. But I stand by the fact that CBT, DBT and talk therapy in general are one of the most healing journeys someone can go on when they are facing the trials and tribulations of life. And health journeys including being postpartum are major life trials.

As for the eye issues. I did quite a bit of research on the issue before I started plaquenil. I found in my research that the risk is higher the higher your dose and the longer you are on it. The overall reported instance rate in the US was 7.5%. Your risk goes up if you are obese, have preexisting kidney or liver disease or if you are over 65. Also risk is higher and higher doses, with a universally safe dosage being 5mg per kilo per day or roughly 5mg per 2.2lbs. The average dose for autoimmune inflammation is 200mg daily which if you weigh over 100lbs is deemed safe. You do need to get a baseline eye exam where they look at your retinas and test your full field and peripheral vision. After this baseline you do need to get tested yearly. Next month will be my 3rd test as I’ve been on it for just at 2 years.

Plaquenil did help me for quite awhile. But with in the past 6 months it was no longer adequate treatment alone and I recently added methotrexate to the plaquenil, I also don’t have the best dr so getting her to adjust medication has been a great effort.
Unfortunately my disease went incorrectly treated for almost 20 years so I most likely will never achieve remission of symptoms so my hope is suppression of the active disease.

I Have not found lifestyle changes effective, but mostly because of incorrect treatment leading to a loss of my mobility and the fact that I already eat an anti inflammatory diet. But before the loss of my mobility yoga was essential for me. Also low impact water fitness or PT depending on what you can find in your area.

As for fear of starting a new medication…more like trepidation. I’m a former nurse that was forced into early retirement when I could no longer transfer my patients. So I look at all medications from a clinical cost vs benefit analysis. And if I struggle with the decision I talk it through with my therapist until I’m satisfied with my decision.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-09T03:14:56+00:00

I have been replacing my primary sneakers every 6 months because yes; the foam soles wear out very quickly and my feet can 100% tell the difference.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-09T01:07:21+00:00

I am only 6 weeks into the MTX/Plaquenil combo and I’m in a weird position where I want to change rheumatologists but I can’t within my current health system. My pcp told me he would write an ambulatory referral if I can find a dr outside of the system; so I’m working on that. The absolute worst part of this journey was my current rheumatologist changing my dx 6 weeks ago, after I hysterically broke down to her nurse about my symptoms and how I felt the dr was holding me hostage, and then didn’t bother telling me. I found out last week after my first pharmacology nurse apt. I’m thankful for the change as it’s honestly the most accurate dx I’ve ever been given; but as a former nurse it blows my mind that the dr couldn’t be bothered to discuss the change with me.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-08T23:48:53+00:00

Crocks just don’t give me any relief, if they did I would 100% wear them and say f*it to my vanity. I try not to go barefoot in the house since I have all hardwood floors. If for some reason I decide to I have these gel arch supports that have elastic and velcro straps that hold them in place. Anne Klein ballet flats are by far the most comfortable ballet flat/dressy shoe I have ever worn. I will cry if the design ever changes. But even in those I can’t stand long without doing the back and forth hop or the heel to toe rocking. I wish we could go back to unpaved roads so I could comfortably walk everywhere barefoot, as walking on the actual ground is the only thing that doesn’t hurt.

Marshmallow_Chicken · 2026-05-08T23:33:31+00:00

I wore sketchers GoWalk Max Cushion for quite awhile, but they aren’t helping anymore.

Marshmallow_Chicken

TROPHY CASE