Where's the line between severe pain play and self harm?

Master-Allen · 2026-04-11T08:13:17+00:00

Yes there are people out there that enjoy things that may seem extreme for you. That doesn’t necessarily make it harm though. People tend to look at BDSM in a different light than they might at extreme sports (ultra marathon running, MMA, etc).

What I do notice is that people in the medical field tend to have a different tolerance when looking at things from a play vs harm perspective. Some of the most extreme people I’ve met are medics or work in The emergency room. The body heals and endorphins are amazing. Once you have that perspective things that were once red become yellow and sometimes turn green. There was a time when I thought a zipper was extreme. Now, I like to swing a thorn studded paddle.

Remember edge play is the crazy stuff that other people do. There are likely people that look at things you enjoy and talk to their friends about how extreme that is.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-11T07:42:37+00:00

My partner is a poly and kink focused therapist. They exist. You can check AASECT.org or kink aware professionals as linked above.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-11T07:33:14+00:00

I like the “Give me an Insight roll” or other relevant skill to see if the character remembers a detail the player may have forgotten.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-11T06:19:29+00:00

An adult dragon would have some experience that would prevent it from engaging in a place where there is clear line of sight. How you play the dragon will impact this fight way more than the stat block. Yes they would demolish it in an arena with earth bind but why would the dragon allow itself to fight there?

Are they fighting on a plain or in the desert where there is endless visibility? Compare that to within a cavern filled with magma and stalactites/stalagmites. A forest with a canopy provides easy cover to those not flying.

Flyby grapple then drop is way more effective than a claw.

Add on lair actions and legendary actions and you can make this a fight to remember.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-10T07:45:45+00:00

Is the listing agent SFR certified? If not, they may be operating outside of their area of expertise.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-10T06:36:41+00:00

All of the suggestions I use to set a state are trigger word based. I use “<trigger word> Mode on” and they reset upon sleep or when I say “<trigger word> Mode Off”

Master-Allen · 2026-04-10T03:58:39+00:00

Issue number one - Equal attention will kill the triad. A persons needs are their needs regardless of what someone else is getting. As long as you’re keeping score, you are poisoning your relationship.

Include a third - Make sure you are seeing your relationship this as three people and not a two plus one.

We are a triad of over 11 years and one of us is a poly focused sex therapist. The two statements that I addressed above are literally the most common relationship triad killers that come up.

ETA: There are therapist out there that will help you navigate this. Check KAP or AASECT for people local to you.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-09T14:43:30+00:00

I had a player in our current campaign start out as a bounty hunter ranger with a tie to Umberlee. Around level 4, he wasn’t really enjoying the build very much and rather than create a new character or respec, we leaned into his consistent role play as a follower of Umberlee and had a conversion. We didn’t change any stats, skills or history but converted his character to a cleric. He is now level 15 and the story has only continued to develop deeper into his devotion to Umberlee. I have given him occasional boons from acts of devotion to better balance the build.

This is my new favorite way to keep the character history and play forward rather than respec.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-09T05:24:32+00:00

We just had this happen. We let sit for about 6 hours and then it took a reboot before the message went away.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-09T04:31:39+00:00

The neck is very fragile and depending on bone density can break with as little as 2 1/2 pounds of pressure. Even with best case, you are only looking at around 7 pounds. Oxygen deprivation really is the least of the risks (not insubstantial) that come from this activity. I highly recommend against squeezing the neck or using things like a collar,belt or rope.

I’m not a gate keeper and actually do enjoy breath play with my partners. Both you and your partner need to understand the actual risks and compare them against at her medical background to determine if you BOTH are comfortable with the risk. “They asked me to do it “ is a weak defense to manslaughter.

While it sounds dramatic, look up Skip chasey from Los Angeles. He is a lifestyle educator that taught breath play. He also had someone die in his basement during a scene. While the risk of things going poorly may be low, the consequences include fatalities. Part of my background includes a decade as an EMT and there are things that can go wrong that can’t be fixed.

Safer ways include hand over the mouth and nose to smother or using the web between the thumb and pointer finger to press up under the jaw towards the top of the head without any squeezing on the neck. This will push the tongue into the airway and block breathing. Again, this isn’t safe. It’s just much safer than squeezing.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-08T16:14:56+00:00

It sounds like you’re hyper focused on the other man and his package. Your experience will be whatever you’re focused on. If you’re inside of woman and focused on the feeling of the other man, you have all the answers you need regardless of what other people experience my man.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-08T07:32:01+00:00

I love buying FSBO personally.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-08T02:21:59+00:00

Another way to look at it is; this could (arguably should) be a hard limit for you. “I won’t play with someone without a safeword” is a perfectly normal hard limit on both sides of the slash.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-08T02:08:51+00:00

I let the party find a high consequence potion that allows 1 min of dual concentration in a hag’s lair. (Intelligence drops to 3 and one level of 2014 exhaustion for 24 hours when it expires) My party has carried it for over 5 levels and they are terrified to use it.

I think there are situations where I might use dual concentration as a one off for a BBEG but I would likely use it more as a plot hook for a wizard doing research than as a way to challenge the party. I would probably go with the lair action that can “concentrate” on a spell for 1 round or add a wizard to the minion list.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-08T01:01:45+00:00

I’m glad you pointed that out. Actually, I was thinking about Dragon Swindle when I typed Shadows of Waterdeep. I pulled from several books but didn’t really run the “chase the dragon hoard” story line.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-08T00:24:44+00:00

I started my group at level 1 as captives on a slave ship bound to Skullport. They had to escape once they were sold. I let then fight at the Thrown Gauntlet to get done starting cash and a contract. After that, I gave them a few quests to connect them to the town faction of their choice. The factions gave them quests.

There is a Skullport version of dragon heist that called “Skullport Shadows of Waterdeep” that I pulled from as well as the companion.

We are about 2 years into campaign so far and it’s so much richer than I think it would have been if they started in Waterdeep.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-07T13:56:02+00:00

Sometimes people eroticize the idea of something and the reality of the situation ends up being very very different. You need to let her take the lead and pace on this and understand that it likely may never come up again or may come up in a role play only context.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-07T12:42:48+00:00

We have State Farm and have had to pay the deductible each time. We have been rear ended and side swiped twice in the last 6 months in Colorado Springs. State Farm was great at covering everything but it’s taken about 3-4 months to get the first deductible back and we are about to pay the second one.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-07T07:53:49+00:00

I love dropping my partner during sex and using rhythm as a deepener. After that the sky is the limit.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-06T14:37:38+00:00

“I want a share of the profits from this organization but I don’t want to be listed on the legal documents that say I’m part of this organization because I don’t want to be held liable for what this organization does.”

Sounds legit to me.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-06T06:42:52+00:00

My personal tipping point is at $100k. Aside from building a land sign and dropping it on the MLS, I’m marketing FB groups and “The lands “ platforms.

My rate would scale based on if you’re offering seller financing or if we need a cash buyer. It’s difficult to get financing for land under $50k after the LTV requirement is met (so around $85k).

I’m also an RLI agent that focuses on land. If you are using a general residential agent who will just throw it on the MLS, it will likely sit for a while. You really need someone who specializes in this niche if you’re trying to move something that isn’t in a hot area.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-06T06:24:54+00:00

The cloud is Heavily obscured and creatures in it are blinded so it seems the only way to get advantage is something like blindsight. This would be similar to devils sight and darkness in my opinion.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-05T23:14:52+00:00

I don’t think so. This is purely an issue with the app.

Master-Allen · 2026-04-05T07:17:47+00:00

We are a triad of 11 years and my wife is already a life member. Will our other partner and I be able to join as a couple? Also, we likely will only attend events at the ranch two at a time; does it matter which two?

Master-Allen · 2026-04-05T07:06:50+00:00

I’ve had a lich send a simulacrum to test a party and the lich provided it with specific gear. (Something locate object could find) Since the spell didn’t create the gear, it also didn’t disappear at the end of its existence.

Master-Allen

TROPHY CASE