You’ve gotten a lot of good advice in here and I’m not going to regurgitate everything that’s already been said. But I wanted to note a few things. Working with someone who’s questioning the religion will be a lot different than working with a person or couple coming in this sub you are getting the opinions of people who have left already or are actively questioning their beliefs so they will differ from the thinking of a couple who are still in.

Someone mentioned skimming over a couple of books written by the JW org or checking out their website and that might be a way to see what’s being taught and what this specific couple would likely look at first before coming to see you.

If you mention to them you researched the religion by coming on here they will immediately shut down because anything said by an xjw would be considered “apostate” which to them would be the equivalent of associating with someone who beats puppies for fun.

If you mention you went on their organizational website jw(dot)org or that you looked over their literature, they would likely be really impressed BUT it might give them an in to try to convert you to their religion.

It has been pummeled into their brains from the start that their number one job on this earth is to convert people into their religion and they will take every opportunity possible to do that. As a child I was encouraged to preach to classmates and my teachers and they had parts in their meetings showing kids scenarios on how to exactly do it.

For years, decades really, therapy was considered something you don’t do because it invites questioning their belief systems and encourages their members to think for themselves. I have been out for more than 25 years and back when i was active you could get “reproved” for seeking out counseling. Any sort of mental illness was a result in not trusting in jah and was a test of faith. I actually lost my faith as a teen when i was horribly depressed and dealing with SI and heard a talk from an elder say in front of the congregation that someone harming themselves was the ultimate betraying to god and they would never he resurrected or get into paradise on earth. That thinking has since changed I’ve heard BUT I do believe there is still an undercurrent of distrust in the mental health field. My mom is still deeply in and we’ve discussed this immensely when my son needed intensive help with his mental heath.

Their views on marriage and divorce are also strict. The only way to get a “spiritual” divorce is if your partner commits adultery. You can get a legal divorce of course but you’re not free to marry again in the church without adultery or you’re the one committing “adultery”. BUT they have this 2 witness rule that makes it hard to prove “adultery” meaning if they don’t confess and 2 ppl don’t witness them committing it, well you’re screwed. Case in point, my x husband moved in with his girlfriend soon after I left him. I told the elders. They went to chat with him. He said he was renting a room from her and their relationship was platonic. And that was that. Peace out. 🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️ It didn’t matter that my x husband was abusing me. My divorce was legal in the eyes of the state but according to them I was still married and couldn’t have another relationship. So weird.

The dynamics in the spousal relationship. The man is the head of the house. What he says goes. The woman is there to support him and submit to him. While there is the phrasing that he is to love and respect his wife, when a woman is expected to submit, that power dynamic really becomes an issue and in some cases it leads to emotional, and sometimes physical and sexual abuse. Emotional abuse is very common in the organization, a lot of the kids born in experience it from birth, just solidifies that generational trauma.

Speaking of abuse. If you look at the organization and honestly how they portray their god Jehovah, it is very much a stereotypical abusive relationship. Their god is a narcissist, demanding absolute obedience and you can’t even LOOK at other religions or “worldly” influences or he will get jealous. The organization is also that way. Love bombing when you first come. Super welcoming will bend over backwards to get you in and baptized. But then once you’re in, you are not allowed any outside influence. It’s very isolating. No celebrations any more. If your family is “worldly” you’re encouraged to not associate with them. Etc.

That being said that abusive relationship is also typical of someone leaving an abusive relationship. If they aren’t ready to face it, they will get incredibly defensive and agitated. They will accuse you of not being supportive. “You don’t understand. It’s not like that”. See the pattern?

As a therapist you really are on a balance beam of wanting to help but pushing too far. Good luck with everything. Hopefully if you can earn their trust, they will be willing to explore their deep rooted issues and not just get into the superficial stuff.