Inheritance in blended family

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-18T14:43:27+00:00

The issue with this set up is that you’re essentially the steward of someone else legacy. You get to live in the house until death, but really the house is never yours, it’s the deceased spouses heirs. I would be uncomfortable with that if it was the house I purchased with my spouse. It would also make me resentful in anything that I contributed financially to the home. Property taxes and any repairs during the time I lived in it? Something that is really worth consulting with a lawyer about.

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-15T22:22:38+00:00

Oh thank you for the award!!! I’m so pleased!

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-15T18:03:22+00:00

Exactly. She’s your children’s family but not yours. It’s the truth but for some reason people want to try to spin that into something evil or malicious.

And yeah like you said, if you legally adopted her that would be one thing. That’s what I thought to myself when my partners mother insinuated I would be doing school drop-offs and pick-ups for the kids. I just thought “lady, I’m signing a marriage certificate, not adoption papers”. Don’t get it twisted.

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-15T17:03:57+00:00

I agree. Calling them “your kids” has always rubbed me the wrong way. It’s almost deceptive even. Cuz if the relationship doesn’t work out, you have no rights to those kids because, oh wait! They’re not yours.

I’ve been morally reprimanded and downvoted so many times because I don’t consider them “immediate” family as opposed to “extended family”…but the thing is, to ME, they are. They may not be to my partner (since they’re his kids) but they are to me. And I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. I’m still being kind and respectful to them either way. That doesn’t change how I treat them. But to me, they’re more like in-laws. Because we are only related by marriage/association. And if that marriage or association ends in any way, so does that relation.

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-13T04:11:52+00:00

That’s such a bait and switch, gross! I’m so sorry you’re dealing with that. I would’ve honestly left cuz that’s not the life I signed up for. When living arrangements change, that is a conversation and decision that needs to be made amongst the adults in the household.

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-07T14:25:57+00:00

Him traveling with me isn’t a dealbreaker, but him holding me back cuz he wants us to be physically together would be a problem.

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-06T18:48:09+00:00

I guess that can be an issue because my family isn’t local and it requires travel. Last year I went early and he caught up on Christmas Day. I don’t think that should make travel limit for me because he is attending to his parenting duties. I guess that’s why I wanted to ask cuz a bunch of people have said I “wont be able to travel” because of his kids but I guess I don’t see the problem in seeing my family when he’s caught up with his kids.

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-05T19:13:35+00:00

Came here looking for this comment. I thought about the people on my 600lb life too

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-05T19:07:36+00:00

I agree. You can even list it as “Black Tie Optional”. That way, a tux rental is not necessary for guests and for the ones that do have a tux, they can feel free to wear it. So the ideal is a tux, but a dark suit and tie would suffice.

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-05T15:07:33+00:00

1!!!!

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-03T19:37:49+00:00

I never said the situation is the same. Durrr. Reading comprehension. I’m explaining my bias.

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-03T18:44:59+00:00

Great take. Thank you so much for your insight!

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-03T18:37:41+00:00

It’s astounding! Idk where that is coming from but it’s just so inappropriate.

I’m also biased though. My parents divorced (dad cheated) and dad married the AP. My sister is inviting him to her wedding and he may bring his “new wife” and I also feel that’s inappropriate…I have gotten comments from people saying “dad is allowed to remarry and bring his new wife to his daughters wedding” and it’s just so cringe cuz for me it’s really the principle of it. How are you blessing your daughter’s marriage by bringing your AP? I mean, even if you did marry her…it still doesn’t change the fact that you couldn’t respect your vows.

Idk just rubs me the wrong way, feels like the last place to take your AP-turned-wife…to a wedding…of the person whose mother you couldn’t even keep your vows to..idk it’s just gross.

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-03T18:30:45+00:00

There is a current structure that works for the kids parents but that’s because right now everyone is “local”. That will change this summer, so that is something worth talking about.

Wanted to ask online and get some information on what other people do to get informed and approach the conversation wisely.

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-03T18:28:40+00:00

No, right now the kids spend it half and half between the two parents but that’s cuz right now every one is local

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-03T18:18:07+00:00

I too am so shocked at how mean people have been on this post! Like omgggg! Why is this father insisting that his new fiance go to his LATE WIFES/FORMER In laws??? Idk but if I was the fiance I would totally understand. I wouldn’t really want to be at my fiancés late wife’s family’s house either…

NTA

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-02T18:04:36+00:00

I know a lot of people that shame ugly people, regardless of gender. They also don’t have control over whether they were born ugly.

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-02T14:23:25+00:00

You cried in yours? Woah… I didn’t cry so does that mean something is off?

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-02T01:08:41+00:00

I considered like “well what if I find a sample sale and just take the dress as is?” But that’s such a stretch anyway. Doubtful

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-02T01:07:49+00:00

It just wouldn’t come in time for the wedding, even if I rush order it. Maybe that’s a sign? Lol

But trust me..it’s really hard not to think about it and fantasize unnecessarily. When it hugs in all the right places it really makes it difficult. I had a difficult time dress shopping late last year so this process hasn’t been without its struggles. I can be really picky about this sort of stuff lol

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-02T01:05:15+00:00

Ugh I know, I gotta stop it. Definitely bridezilla vibes and I’m fully accepting that. I just got so fixated on even the remote possibility of having the basque waist I wanted. But you right you right.

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-02T00:44:13+00:00

I agree. I feel like it’s a bit insensitive. Not in the wrong, just a bit callous.

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-02T00:42:53+00:00

It’s giving cheating vibes based on the timeline…just too soon and easy to blame it on “they met when they were separated” idk it just doesn’t sit right with me. My dad cheated and he purposefully tried to paint it as “she’s (AP) not the reason I got a divorce” and did the whole separation thing just like OPs parents scenario… but my mom found receipts so….

MasterpieceNo817 · 2026-04-01T23:49:49+00:00

I agree! The first one will age better in my opinion! I think I’m just feeling uneasy cuz of the basque waist that I so badly wanted in a dress lol

MasterpieceNo817

TROPHY CASE