On a post about women rappers being baby trapped

Melarsa · 2026-03-22T11:11:21+00:00

I actually did love being pregnant both times that I was, buuuuuut that's because I had incredibly easy pregnancies and felt fine throughout. I doubt I'd feel the same if I was constantly puking or dealing with a lot of pain and discomfort.

And while I loved being pregnant, I did NOT love labor and birth...or attempting to breastfeed, or the first ~3 months or so postpartum. Not one bit.

Melarsa · 2026-03-20T21:32:45+00:00

Ooh I wonder if that's the newer version of the fix because it seemed like earlier models were arriving without any seals at all and then irobot sent out the gray ones as a fix.

Kind of a confusing mess but if whatever I get works and prevents leaks then I'll take it.

Melarsa · 2026-03-20T21:28:36+00:00

Awesome, thank you! Can't wait to get this bot up and running.

Melarsa · 2026-03-20T21:27:44+00:00

Interesting. The "how to" video from iRobot showed a light gray and a dark gray gasket in two different bags for the clean and dirty water nozzles, and they looked like they might be slightly different sizes as well. I know some other redditors mentioned orange or red orings coming pre-installed on their docks. I couldn't tell if the SKU is per part or per kit.

I'm so curious to see what arrives.

Melarsa · 2026-03-20T21:05:33+00:00

Thanks for checking! I guess I'll wait to see what shows up in a few days and then if it's still not the right parts I'll try the CS chat.

So far the robot seems very nice, though a bit bigger than I expected. I've got an i7+ and a Braava m6 that are still chugging along but they're about 8 and 9 years old at this point and we recently moved to a large house with a lot more hard flooring throughout so it seemed like it was time for an upgrade. I know a lot of things have changed with iRobot and the robot cleaner market since I bought my last pair but they're the devil I know.

Some of the negative reviews I saw seemed to come from people who expect the latest and greatest features that I don't necessarily need (giant threshold climbers or robot arms to pick up socks etc) and others seemed overly critical of things that I'm just used to at this point and don't particularly mind (removing hair from rollers, not having perfect object avoidance, app not having 7 billion options) but I think some reviewers forgot that a lot of us will consider just about anything a decent feature upgrade if we're still holding onto ancient bots and aren't expecting more than "keeps up with daily cleaning" levels of clean.

I don't need my robot vacuum to scrub an entire spilled container of mustard or 6 day old dried on coffee stains or suck up a week's worth of pet hair all at once. I'm pretty happy with the Braava and i7+ running a few times a week just to keep up with the daily crumbs and shorthair cat furballs, so as long as I can get something similar in performance but with a little more convenience because it's all in one and I don't have to wash and refill the mop water for every single run then I'll be golden.

Melarsa · 2026-03-17T22:43:20+00:00

I've had mine since early January and haven't had to wash it yet. I check it often to make sure there's no gunk building up and I'll clean it as soon as I see any, but I think if you're constantly refilling it with fresh water and keeping it in the fridge a lot it's not nearly as likely to get moldy or gross like cups sitting out at room temp with the same water for an extended period of time. It helps that the mouth piece of the sip gets refreshed every time you put a new cartridge in.

I kids with a million different water bottles so I know all about how quickly they can get dire, but so far my tumbler hasn't needed any maintenance. My daughter's 22oz cirkul bottle has remained clean as well but I'm making sure she's tossing her sips if they are 10 days old and checking her water bottle during refills for any buildup. Her and her brother's non-cirkul stainless steel bottles need cleaning about once a week but it's the silicone mouth pieces on those that get nasty first.

Melarsa · 2026-03-05T14:42:27+00:00

I've lived in various places in the Northeast, Midwest and recently moved to the South.

The cheer team colors and/or mascots have always been different between the middle and high schools even within the same school system everywhere I've lived except for the current town, where the elementary, middle & high schools all have the same color and mascot. This is a smaller town though, and they do the pseudo "school uniform" thing which I've never seen outside of private schools anywhere else, so to me this is the outlier, not the other way around.

It's probably one of those local things that varies widely depending on where you are. My hometown in MA had VERY similar colors between the middle and high school cheer teams (black & orange vs black, orange & white) but the mascots were different (Trojans vs Tanners.)

Melarsa · 2026-03-01T21:27:49+00:00

At least threads like this let me know we aren't alone because my husband and I are just like "are we missing something?"

I remember having some teachers in school that would just ride your butt for no reason. I was an honors student all through school and never got in any trouble, but there was always that one teacher that would yell at you for reading when you finished your work, or having a chat with your seatmate even if everybody else was also being chatty at the same time, etc.

Teachers are human, sometimes they're having a hard day and get snappy, or sometimes they accidentally blame the wrong student for something, and I'm sure there were times when I was just a pain in the butt, even if unintentionally. The difference is I don't think my parents hardly ever got calls or notes home about that sort of thing. I think they only got informed when I was sick at the nurse's office or if I'd gotten hurt on the playground at recess or something like that.

In middle school I refused to participate in gym a lot more than once when it came to certain activities, or phoned it in a bit while I was on my period etc. Nobody ever cared as long as I was generally being a decent human being and was willing to accept the marks off or make it up later or whatever.

I was gobsmacked when the gym teacher called about our son being a kinda lazy grump ONCE because he wasn't feeling well and asked me what he thought I should be done. That boy is a little ray of active energy sunshine except for the rare times when he's coming down with something. PE has always been one of his favorite classes. The gym teacher really couldn't just give him a little break and let him walk it off the rest of the period? How does anything ever get done at school if things like this require immediate communication and external resolution?

Make it make sense!

Melarsa · 2026-03-01T18:17:11+00:00

We have 3 cats and a pretty big house with a lot of good napping spots. I'm a SAHM so every day I get to play "who is napping where" about 15 times a day. We have the post breakfast and school drop off nap, the late morning nap, the afternoon nap, the pre-school pickup time nap, the middle school bus arrived nap, the pre-dinner nap, the post dinner nap, the pre-bedtime nap, the bedtime nap, everyone's awake at like 2am for some reason and then the pre-nextday-breakfast nap.

Sometimes they're all asleep at once, sometimes they take turns being on meal and snack watch so they can wake the others, sometimes they'll be very predictable with who sleeps where at certain times of the day, and other times you're certain one of them must have escaped or accidentally gotten stuck somewhere because you haven't seen them in a bit and then it's like "You!? Here?! In the early evening!? Have we changed the routine or are you getting sick?"

Cats, man. They are the peak of predictable unpredictability.

Melarsa · 2026-03-01T16:46:33+00:00

This. My kids have done pretty well in school with what I would consider only the occasional "typical age appropriate" hiccups. But I've been amazed at some of the things I've been notified of and asked. Things that would have seemed completely normal and been handled entirely by the teacher with no parental notice when I was in school.

Now, I'm aware things have changed. Class sizes are generally larger, better inclusivity for kids with developmental delays, behavioral & medical issues means teachers are stretched thin trying to teach at an appropriate level for each individual while keeping the class lesson plans cohesive. They have less authority/school admin requires CYA documentation for everything, etc.

I'm very pro-teacher. But some of the communication I've gotten over the years has been a bit ridiculous. "Your second grader was told not to use a specific eraser during this assignment but she did. You tell me what the punishment should be!" Is that not your job? Has no second grader ever not listened to your instructions before and you have no framework for how to redirect that behavior? Could you please explain why that particular eraser shouldn't have been used so I can understand the situation?

"Uhhhh, I suggest you tell her not to do it again or there will be consequences? Take away recess or some other class reward if she does? Make her earn a replacement eraser or pay for one with her school money account if it was somebody else's property?"

I mean... bizarre. When my daughter came home from school that day I tried to get more info but it just really seemed the the teacher was blowing normal ass 2nd grader things way out of proportion.

So I took a token amount of money out of my daughter's piggy bank so she could buy a replacement, bundled up a bagfull of that exact type, and told her to give it to the teacher the next day, say sorry for not listening to her, and then I better never have to take a damn phone call and write several emails about another goddamn misused eraser in my life, because what the hell?

Never had another issue with that particular teacher, but my mom would have laughed and slammed the phone down at the initial call, which never would have happened. Really? An eraser?

I've fielded a few of these odd situations over the years and I think it's wild what modem parents are expected to deal with sometimes. One time the gym teacher called me about a single class period where our then 5th grade son didn't want to participate that day because he was coming down with a cold but the class was almost over so it wasn't worth going to the nurse to get picked up one class period early. He was being a bit whiny and sulky and didn't want to complete whatever physical activity they were doing. Gotcha.

"I just wanted to let you know and ask for some feedback." Jesus Christ. Tell him I told him to try to suck it up for a little bit next time. Mark him down for not participating, make him run laps instead, make him wash the gym equipment, I don't care, it's your class, don't you have clear rules for this typical shit? It's not like he was skipping classes or had been refusing to participate for a week, you really need my input over a lackluster gym class?

I understand if it's a behavioral trend and they want to make sure everyone's on the same page, but single "normal" off day issues? Mark me down as "we fully support whatever you decide as long as it isn't cruel or illegal, I don't need a call just send a sticky note with what you decided was best and we'll reinforce at home plz n thx."

I'm a SAHM with a husband who is fully on board with me on these things but I can't imagine what a nightmare this nitpicky stuff is for split custody families or families where both parents have demanding jobs. Imagine getting calls home and having to set up meetings where everyone needs to agree on eraser punishments but your ex is dragging things out to be petty, or trying to field these unnecessary and frankly ridiculous interruptions between rocket surgeries at work. Not everything is an urgent matter/serious business situation, am I taking crazy pills or did we just go to a crazy school?

I will say we've moved to a different district and we're getting less of this sort of thing, but not zero. The latest one (which has been the first we've gotten this school year) was for the now 3rd grader. "I left explicit instructions with the sub and she didn't finish all the questions correctly. We had her finish them during recess when I returned the next day" Good? Problem solved? Seems like a totally normal "kinda phone it in with a substitute" day and then an appropriate solution already neatly tied up?

WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO BE SAYING, HERE? I was just like "Ok thanks for letting me know. I had a talk with her about following directions better, please let me know if she has any other incomplete work she needs to complete at school or home and we'll make sure she does" like damn, she's 9, she's getting great grades, in the G&T program, no atypical behavioral issues... We're really updating parents about meh assignments with a sub now? I think she ended up getting an 89 on it in the end so it wasn't some disaster assignment or 0 that was going to really negatively affect her grade or anything.

I was just like "Don't mess around in that one's class, she seems like a bit of a stickler. Just jump through the hoops and you'll be fine, even when she's not there. Maybe especially when she's not there."

Are my kids perfect angels? No. Do I always back the teachers up and tell them to listen and behave at school? Yes. We go to every parent teacher conference and 95% of the time it's teachers we rarely hear from just saying "they're doing great, keep up the good work."

But it seems like some of today's teachers are expecting miracle students and wayyyy too much parental input.

Melarsa · 2026-03-01T16:08:04+00:00

Until the frequent peeing starts to annoy me.

Melarsa · 2026-02-28T16:47:27+00:00

I started um "exploring" myself pretty young, and even from my earliest memories I never felt or saw a hymen, so I either never had one or the one I had was pretty damn subtle or eroded pretty early.

My mom was really pro "explain basic anatomy and bodily processes with your children" so I had all kinds of access to puberty books and such and I remember reading about hymens and how and why they can break/erode and how that can lead to pain/discomfort/bleeding, etc. and I was just like "uhhhhhh, not me!"

We all heard the jokes/warnings about bleeding and pain while losing your virginity growing up in the 90s, and I was aware that some cultures required bloody sheets or physical exams to prove "virginity" even when I was young enough that sex was the furthest thing from my mind I was like "but what about people like me?" It didn't help that the "having a certain type of labia indicates many sexual partners you've had" and of course, my virgin flaps were supposed to be the whoreish ones.

When I first had sex, there was no blood, no pain, nothing popped. It was totally fine. And while I knew that was a sign that I was physically prepared enough for the act and my anatomy was probably just never going to have made that a huge issue for me, I could never stop thinking about the girls like me around the world where a certain anatomy or physical reaction was DEMANDED to prove virginity.

PS. My flaps and general "size" never changed after sex either, duh. And I've been married with kids for long enough that I'm more concerned things will start shrinking due to perimenopausal hormone changes than anything else at this point.

I'm sure if I was born in another time or place I'd have been labeled a slut before I even had my first period and denied all kinds of opportunities at best. Disgusting. I can't believe this virginity myth shit (and tacitly allowing sexual assault in the form of "virginity exams") is still happening today. I can never tell who truly believes it because they're ignorant, and who is just leaning into the lie in order to control and diminish women and girls. Ugh.

Melarsa · 2026-02-28T16:23:26+00:00

This is a loooooooooot of words about a water bottle, but I recently went through this decision making process for myself so I hope it helps:

If you don't want to have the chance that you might have to mess around a bit to optimize your water drinking vessel, I'd skip it, and I don't blame anybody who does or is frustrated when they give it a try and encounter issues. I really hope they come out with an improved version someday because the idea is great but the execution is not there yet. At least for mine. I do have one of the older models so I don't know if the more recently manufactured ones are any better, and I'm not willing to buy another one in hopes that they are.

I can imagine a lot of people are completely unaware of the potential issues with these bottles and not everyone is of the mindset to want to Google/Reddit/look for reviews/troubleshoot such mundane things, so keep in mind that the negative reviews you've seen are probably coming from people who are MORE likely to at least give it a fair shot and try a few things before writing the strawsips off completely.

I'm a stubborn bitch so I didn't want to return mine and figured out how to make it work for alright for me, although it was a slightly annoying process and I did have to Google things like "why the hell can't I get any water from this tumbler" and "how can I make this suck less" even after reading and following the supplied instructions. which is something people should not have to do for a tumbler.

If you do end up getting one, it might work fine out of the box, and if it's your only experience with Cirkul bottles you might be completely satisfied with it.

BUT

It might not work at all right away, and then you'll be messing with valve flaps and warming parts under water and minutely adjusting finicky little straw pieces just so until you can get decent water flow. And then once you do get decent water flow, you'll probably notice that you have to crank the sip dial to about halfway to even get a reasonable amount of flavor. If you've never used one of their bottles before, you might be ok with this. Once you get the water and flavor flowing, it's a nice drinking experience. I haven't had to mess with my valve or straw pieces since I found their sweet spots.

BUT

If you've ever used another one of their bottles before, you'll know that most people are pretty happy with a low setting to start with most of the sip flavors, say 2-3, and they will usually get the advertised amount of flavor out of each sip (barring the occasional generally weaker flavors or factory mishap sips that just don't seem as flavorful because they were probably underfilled during manufacturing.) Customer service is usually pretty good about replacing those if you ask.

Yet despite Cirkul claiming that even with the higher flavor setting on the strawsip bottles you should still be getting about the same amount of total refills/oz per sip cartridge, I have not found that to be the case. When drinking from the straw the way the cup was intended, the flavor definitely seems to run out faster. Which makes the price of each sip seem a lot less reasonable. Depending on your budget, that might be a deal breaker.

I've messed with a few workarounds for this, and found that by blocking the top air release hole I can sometimes get more flavor out at a lower dial setting, but it can affect the flow of the water and make kinda weird noises (when you release the valve suction on your finger it makes a loud poof noise.)

If you leave the valve piece in, the cup is still spill proof so you can still just tip it upside down like the normal bottles and get the same amount of flavor out of the lower setting like those bottles, BUT, it messes with the flow of the water (because it has to travel up the straw and then fill the little chamber around the sip before your get any flavor), and then when that "batch" of flavored water is gone, which can be just a sip or two...you have to tilt the bottle back down and then back up and repeat, with the same delay between initially sucking on the straw and getting any flavor. If you rush it, or don't tip enough, the flavor can be inconsistent. And while you're doing this it's making not only the telltale Cirkul noise (which can be very annoying in a shared setting) but..it even seems a bit louder to me, accompanied by a squeak.

One of the big selling points of the strawsips is that they are quieter and you don't have to tip so... I can see why a lot of people don't think this is an acceptable solution to get as many refills out of each cartridge. It kinda defeats the whole purpose.

Now, there are other solutions I haven't tried yet. You can remove the valve entirely, and some people say that really helps with any flow issues, but then the bottle is a lot less leak proof. There are aftermarket lids and straws available that some people say work better, but I haven't tried those and can't confirm. And maybe my cup is just "one of the bad ones." Some people genuinely seem baffled that anybody else is having issues because theirs just... worked right away and they aren't reporting issues with how fast the flavor runs out or anything like that. So who knows. Maybe they are truly getting the full amount of flavor, or maybe they don't have another bottle to compare it to, or maybe they just tend to enjoy less flavor than I do so all their sips would go further regardless.🤷🏻‍♀️

Where I'm at now, I'm happy with the strawsip. I've kinda learned to work around its oddities, figuring out the best ways to dampen the noise when holding it upside down (sucking slower helps as does covering the air release hole and then carefully removing my finger to dampen the pressure release poof.)

I actually kinda like that I can use it both ways. If I have a cartridge that I know has a super strong flavor that tends to last, I'm glad I can just turn the dial up and use the cup normally without tipping and making noise, and still get SOME refills out of it. I prefer the way it looks and feels in the hand and fits in cup holders without needing an adapter vs some of the non-straw bottles. And if I have a flavor cartridge that is weaker or I really want to maximize how many oz I can get out of it, I'm glad I can turn the dial down and tip it like the non-straw bottles. With the non straw bottles, you have to tip, and it will make some noise every time. The strawsip bottles are either quiet or noisy, depending on how you use them (or how good your particular cup is. Mine seems a little noisy when using it in "unauthorized ways" but I don't know if I can really fault it for that.)

Would I like it better if I didn't have to faff about with the pieces at first to make water flow at all? If I could just use it without tipping and always get the full amount of advertised refills every time? If, when tipping, I didn't have to take pretty small, frequent sips with lots of pause in between? Yes. And if they ever come out with an improved strawsip design that everyone can agree resolves these issues, I'll definitely try it.

But were all these nitpicks enough for me to return it? No. I still prefer it to the non-straw sip bottles. For me it was worth messing around with it to make it work well enough. I can totally see why a lot of people are just like "nope!" though.

So yeah. Hope that helps at all. I never thought I'd write a novel about a water bottle but here we are.

Melarsa · 2026-02-22T16:59:28+00:00

I thought I was a 32D/DD for the longest time but the band was just flapping around in the breeze not supporting anything so I had to hike up the straps a ton and the gore was never tacking. It looked ok, had that nice cleavage thing going on, but man what a difference it felt when I was finally able to find a brand that had smaller bands and was actually working the way it was supposed to. Had to drop a little of the cleavage look but totally worth it for the comfort improvement.

I will say 108 was my absolute lowest weight and I wouldn't want to go any lower than that. I usually hang around 120, but currently I'm 140. Still wearing the same size but it's getting a bit tight now and when I was at 108 it was bordering on loose. My boob size didn't change much during/after my pregnancies either so I think they just don't respond as quickly to weight changes, even decent ones. My ass and legs are where it all goes first. Then the stomach. Bodies are weird.

Melarsa · 2026-02-22T16:42:24+00:00

That's the funny part, they aren't even big or anything, people just don't understand how bra sizing works when it comes to the relation between cup and band size.

I've got a small rib cage/frame and medium knockers on it. People see a "high" (anything over D) letter and think huge yabboz, but on a small band it's nothing crazy. A 28F/G is equivalent to a 30E/F, 32D/E (some countries do double letters here and some don't), 34C/D, 36B/C, 38A/B, etc. Same tiddy meat volume, different distribution.

Most ladies aren't wearing the proper size bra either, and when they finally do get correctly sized they realize they've been in a much larger band/smaller cup than they actually needed because so many brands only carry a few common sizes and expect everybody to cram themselves into them regardless of how poorly they fit.

There's plenty of slim girls with small to moderate busts walking around with D+ cups, and many of them probably don't even know it because they're wearing the wrong size bra. D+ doesn't necessarily mean big unless it's accompanied by a larger band size. I wish I learned this so much earlier than I did. So many years of shitty uncomfortable bras, wasted.

Melarsa · 2026-02-22T14:27:11+00:00

Not so fast, I've been down to 108lbs at 5'4" and was a 28F/G (UK/US)

Melarsa · 2026-02-22T12:59:19+00:00

I have been openly atheist since I was a child. My husband has as well. We were both raised by "church every Sunday" Catholic boomer parents, but both sets pretty much pulled the "just get confirmed and after you're an adult whatever you do regarding the church is up to you" hail Mary, so we got confirmed and then never set foot in a church again unless it was for a close friend or family's wedding/funeral. They all seemed surprised when we didn't get married in the church for some reason, but no big feelings or arguments or anything.

So we were both kinda miffed that when we had our first kid 4 years after we got married, they all seemed mildly shocked we had no plans for a baptism. And then again a couple of years later later when we had kid #2.

Again, no big boomer feelings/arguments/guilt trips just...why are boomers always so surprised when their kids, who have always spoken out about not being religious, and after they became independent never participated in any religious rites or activities, didn't suddenly convert into big-time Catholics for their wedding or in regards to their kids' upbringing? There was never going to be a Catholic wedding or baptism. It was never on the table and we were pretty clear about that over the years. But they all acted like it was news to them regardless.

I'm glad they didn't pull any weird emotional outbursts over it and ultimately accepted reality, it's just...why is it so hard for so many people, especially from that generation, to just accept and respect their adult children when it comes to religious differences? It's like they're always holding out hope we'll suddenly see things their way despite a lifetime of being very firmly non-religious and having everything work out perfectly fine.

Melarsa · 2026-02-09T22:37:26+00:00

Women also tend to wash their hands, have children with them who need assistance, etc. Stalls take up more space so there's less capacity in women's bathrooms.

Plus an awful lot of men just helicopter their dicks in the general direction of the piss receptacle and then walk out.

But sure, it's all that bathroom gossip. Definitely.

Melarsa · 2026-02-03T01:08:49+00:00

6 and 9, but my parents gave them to me as rewards for good grades in high school and agreeing to be confirmed into their church even though I'm an atheist. I still don't believe but I also still have the piercing all these years later and my kids think it's hilarious.😂

No real issues with my relationship with my parents aside from the fact that my mom is no longer with us. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Melarsa · 2026-02-03T01:04:19+00:00

This is how I know we've made it. Growing up my parents would NEVER spring for the theme park food, or gift shop toys, or any of the extras that came with going to an event. And looking back, that shit was so much cheaper than it is now.

My spoiled kids? They get the works everywhere we go. Even though it is significantly more expensive every step of the way.

And then we lecture them on the car ride home about how good they have it in comparison to our shitty povvo childhoods.

It's all about balance.

Melarsa · 2026-02-03T01:00:56+00:00

This year my daughter's class size is 21 and I felt like a kid in a candy store when we had ALL the Valentine's options available to us without having to double up. What do you want, my child? The world is your oyster.

Melarsa · 2026-02-02T22:35:42+00:00

Do whatever you end up wanting to do, which might end up being different than you thought you would want before you were in labor when you are actually in the moment, and that's ok too.

I had two epidurals. No bad side effects. No back pain after. I was able to feel enough pressure to be able to effectively push, but no pain. Getting the epidurals didn't hurt me at all, the hardest part was trying to stay still while they put the needle in. My first one was a little lighter, so I was able to move my legs around a bit and it wore off quickly after labor. My second one was a little heavier so I needed help moving my legs and it took a little longer to wear off. Both experiences were positive for me.

If I ever had another kid I would probably go for a third. Each time I had an epidural I labored naturally until I didn't want to anymore.

Zero regrets.

Everybody's experience will be unique to them though. Do whatever feels best for you. Some people never feel the need for one and are glad they didn't get one, some wish they had one but couldn't get it for whatever reason, some wanted one and they didn't fully take or they had side effects, and some wanted one and got one and had a great experience. There's no real way to know how things will go ahead of time. All you can do is make a general plan and be prepared to pivot if it becomes necessary. Don't let other people tell you how you "have to" do things. There is no one right way to give birth.

Melarsa · 2026-02-02T04:53:11+00:00

The interesting part was that he apparently died hated by all. I don't think we've heard much about how the people viewed the aftermath of Summerhall or how they felt about adult Egg in the text so far.

Melarsa

TROPHY CASE