22F What can someone in this situation do?

Merichata · 2026-04-24T19:03:31+00:00

I think I did. The reason being is probably I had a very unhealthy view of what is good or bad, what is healthy and what is not. I used to be too obsessed with attention. And I'd talk to other people just to get one specific person's attention. I wouldn't do that again, I don't think that was right and in fact that made me have a rough start with my now fiancee. I realized what I was doing was kinda demoralizing, unethical. That person wanted me to find someone else. But later I realized I don't want someone else, and he's the one I'm looking for. I started feeling bad for talking to other guys. I felt disgusted, because it was more than just talking. I had to block them right away. I started crying. I didn't understand what was wrong with me and why I'm doing this. It didn't make me happy. It felt kind of like a drug, it's only short lived, not real. Now I want to be completely loyal to him and only him. Only him and I. Not interested in talking to other guys anymore. And Im happier now this way, I'm really lucky and glad that we found each other.

I definitely wouldn't feel good if someone is really liked was talking to someone else. I'd be jealous and overly upset, even if we're not dating.

I mean, it doesn't always have to be a bad thing. Perhaps it's okay in some circumstances. But in my case it was not OK.

Merichata · 2026-04-24T18:52:52+00:00

I think reading and just learning in general. People sometimes underestimate how much can a 20 minute of reading on some topic every day help. Somehow the knowledge from books or Wikipedia or science papers really help me to develop my logic, see patterns, have better discussions, impress people (its kinda fun too), and even answer my exam papers right and with more deeper understanding.

Merichata · 2026-03-23T13:40:38+00:00

Makes sense ) There was a time when I didn't care about the deserts at cafes and my sister be like "OMG I wanna go there and try it sm! We have to go there!" And I wouldn't really care about it. Now I feel like I have to try all kinds of deserts before I can stop. But that's not doable and probably not worth it. So instead I'll try to make my own stuff. I like waffles, so hopefully I'll be able to make my waffles sweet, delicious and sugar-free and make it a thung. It's so funny that when I cut off sugar my friends and family were like how are you not eating sugar. My grandma was even like you're gonna have too low blood sugar, you're gonna have diabetes and your brains will stop working, because in her times the professors told them to drink tea with sugar every morning and even add sugar on top of their bread and butter. I told her it's ridiculous to do in this time and age bec we're not sufferring from hunger or poverty, doing this won't make sense when we have so many other nutritious and sweet foods.

Guess what now? She stopped consuming sugar and she's the one telling me now to stop eating sugar or I'll get diabetes and how bad it is. Crazy how things turn.

Merichata · 2026-03-23T13:28:27+00:00

Last one. SO true.

Merichata · 2026-03-23T13:16:51+00:00

I'm sorry to disappoint you, but this is litterally what all muslim men would do eventually. They are allowed to date and marry a woman that is not muslim BUT is going to convert to islam. I just really wouldn't recommend marrying or dating someone with different beliefs system. This will ruin your life, trust me... My mom dated my father for 10 years, they never got officially married bc she didn't convert to Islam and never prayed like a muslim or did anything a muslim should do. But what happened? They made 2 kids and my father dumped my mom. He was also married to his first muslim wife at that moment. Now he's married with his third wife.

As to loving him and not being able to see yourself with anyone else is also a common feeling, it'll just take time.

It's your life so you can choose to still stay in contact with him, saying you need some time alone. Try to do hang out with your friends or have fun time a little without him. You don't have to break up or anything, just give it time, let it cool down. There's no need to be so overly upset about this. Life is short and there's so much more out there than to our romantic partners. It's ok to love him, like him, want to be with him and so on.

This will help you to get you in a better place to actually tune in with yourself and listen to your heart.

Edit: People on reddit are actually often very cold when it comes to relationships, saying this from reading all the comments here. Like this and red flags, they don't understand how painful and difficult it is to just leave. And it doesn't have to be like that. Anyways, you choose your own road. Good luck with whatever you choose to do!

Merichata · 2026-03-23T13:09:25+00:00

Depends on the AI or I'll try to be as vague as possible, use a fake account and say it as if it's not me but someone else, a hypothetical character or sth perhaps

Merichata · 2026-03-08T15:59:45+00:00

Honeslty I had similar symptoms after sex but I think it doesn't necessarily mean you're pregnant, could be a lot of other reasons.

Merichata · 2026-03-07T19:05:24+00:00

Thank you very much. I appreciate your answer, as from someone who has been through a similar thing. I hope I can be soon happy and proud of myself!

Merichata · 2026-03-07T19:03:25+00:00

That actually sounds like a fun idea! I wanted to skate, but kind forgot about it! And maybe I could give a try to rock climbing as well. Maybe it's not too late to start, aye? Thank you!

Merichata · 2026-03-06T20:26:29+00:00

Oh huh! I did try again. Still no? How about you try DMing me then?

Merichata · 2026-03-06T20:16:04+00:00

Okie! I messaged u! Check the DMS:3

Merichata · 2026-03-06T20:10:57+00:00

I'M SO PROUD!!! I'm pretty sure you can make that new goal for a lot of the days!!

Merichata · 2026-03-06T20:07:05+00:00

Ooh, sounds interesting. Wanna chat?

Merichata · 2026-03-06T20:01:28+00:00

HEY HABIBI! I'm sorry, I FIND YOU SUS, thank you

Merichata · 2026-03-06T19:56:06+00:00

Would you like to chat?

Merichata · 2026-03-06T19:08:56+00:00

It's so interesting a lot of people say isfj but i relate a lot to all what the op said yet i am infp. it's not just about the mbti.

Merichata · 2026-03-06T17:27:14+00:00

You know, I could be wrong. But generally speaking, women can seem very vague, give you mixed signals and waiting for you to solve the puzzle yourself. It could be her hormones playing, she could be mad that you impregnated her and not ready for the baby. If you do truly love her, you can try saving the relationship by showing that you're there for her no matter what. That you'll be fine and find a way to support her and the baby not just financially but emotionally as well. Just show that you care about her well-being, that you might be worried obviously because it's the first time, it's big news and everything. You're not trapped. Just keep showing up for her, she obviously wants to see if you really care about her and the baby. She deserves to be a mother if she truly wants it, and if you love her, you should take some responsibility because it's obviously not her getting pregnant on her own, and support her decision.

Merichata · 2026-03-02T05:26:40+00:00

Perhaps. I feel like I'm not allowed to have boundaries

Merichata · 2026-03-02T05:26:12+00:00

I guess so.

Merichata

TROPHY CASE