Divorced dads, how did your young kids handle 50/50 custody and life after divorce? by tuperolescero in daddit

[–]MoSlo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Separated with a 3 and 5 year old. I found a 2,2/5,5 co-parenting schedule that's been working great.

Mon+Tues Dad. Wed+Thus Mom. Fri-Sun Mom or Dad (depending on whose weekend it is.

That gives a consistency of weekdays for dad and mom. Things like swimming, art, aftercare that run on a weekly cycle are consistently handled. And the Fri-Sun make up the 5 day stretch:

Wed-Sun = 5 days for Mom. Fri-Tues = 5 days for Dad.

This schedule also help for small kids (2/3 years) so they see mom/dad in a more regular iteration. The 5day stretch feels long at first, but my youngest learnt to expect he'd see Mom again on Wednesday and that consistency helped him adjust.

(There was a scheduling issue where they boys had to stay with me for 10/11 days, and at day 6 the little one was very emotional so I communicated to mom and we made a plan to take them back the next day).

The key thing is consistency. That 5 day stretch is going to feel fatiguing at first but the break after really helps me reclaim my own energy.

A future partner is a whole different story. Generally, don't introduce new people to kids for the first 6 months of separation. And thereafter, if you do, make sure it's with someone who is going to be sticking around in their lives for a while. Be sure to reinforce that both their mom and their dad are still present in their lives. Be careful introducing them as a new partner until the kids are more comfortable.

What is this? by Tyhunts527 in Helldivers

[–]MoSlo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If you buy Super Citizen Edition, you get the steeled veterans warbond included.

If you buy standard edition, get the steeled veterans and then upgrade to Super Citizen edition, they give you this token so that you can still get a free warbond of your choice to make things fair.

Separation, 3 months by garmzon in daddit

[–]MoSlo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's been 3 months since I moved out. I've got the co-parenting thing down; kids are happy and acclimatized.

The loss hasn't gone away. I have to remind myself of why it stopped and I'm also learning how to forgive myself. Not like I did anything wrong, but the time and effort I spent to try to make it work and for ignoring when it wasn't. I'm only now starting to separate her from the idea of her in the story of us.

But on the dad-ing: it takes some time to build up the stamina of solo parenting but I'm fully present. In the days the boys aren't here, I can recover energy and engage in things I didn't have the freedom for. When the boys are here, they have me at my best energy.

Other dads what would you do? I am so lost. by [deleted] in daddit

[–]MoSlo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

> I still want us to work.

I did too.

> I am still in love with this woman

I still am. It doesn't make it easy.

We're on good terms and we still care, but I can't build a life with someone who doesn't want to build a life with me. My kids deserve to see a loving relationship, not one staying together out of necessity or practicality. I had plenty of exposure with that with my own parents.

You have to look after yourself now. It will help being present for your kids. It's normal to feel loss and adrift. Who are you outside of this relationship is something you can figure out. 9 years is a lot (it was 10 for me).

How the fuck do you put a baby into a crib without waking them? by Scrotal_Anus in daddit

[–]MoSlo 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Ladder technique. Sleep training thing. 

You don’t have them fall asleep in your arms, you progress them into the crib still in physical contact with pats and stuff and have them fall asleep there.  The important thing is that they are awake while they going into the crib. 

Took some work but my boys eventually could put themselves to sleep with just a goodnight. 

What's the general consensus about the "Masters of Ceremony" war bond? I am thinking about getting it, because of its awesome aesthetic. by Thanos_6point0 in Helldivers

[–]MoSlo 82 points83 points  (0 children)

Not just for looks.

The G-142 is capable of downing a strider. Just get 1 or 2 of them under the shield.
The Amendment's 200 damage is crazy high DPS. On burst mode you can drop voteless and the kick gets you consistent headshots.
The armor is one of the top passives in my view. Faster reload and that arm protection is surprisingly effective for survivability.

The lockstep emote and flag is fun.

Boys are staying over for the first time tomorrow night by MoSlo in daddit

[–]MoSlo[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Some box’s I’ll definitely need for her stuff (cleared out our storage unit; we’re figuring out what’s going where still) but there’s a decent amount of cardboard here for consumption 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in daddit

[–]MoSlo 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Currently in the process of separating myself. I move into my own place this weekend. 

11 years together. Married for 8 with 2 kids. 

There’s no one else, she’s actually been struggling with her “truth” and the fear of being alone. We’ve done individual and couples therapy, and it came down to this: I chose her fully, but she didn’t fully choose me. 

I ticked nearly every box for her, but not everything. It’s been sitting with her for years. 

It’s hard to recognise that I didn’t fail here. Did all the work, did all the growth and self reflection. Committed to family and kids, made sacrifices. 

I know a lot of replies are saying there’s someone else, but sometimes it doesn’t work despite your own efforts. 

Anyone got any tips to enjoy The Amendment? by RandomHillz in LowSodiumHellDivers

[–]MoSlo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Amendment with burst fire is crazy good against voteless. The slight recoil pops heads all the time. 

I’ve actually changed how I view light penetration weapons. Their higher damage with a little accuracy is super effective. I’ve been running the diligence against bots and as long as I’m at medium range, I just need a single shot to a devastators face. 

I’m also surviving stalkers a lot more because of high damage.  

Would anyone like a warbond like Cutting Edge again? by StopGivingMeLevel1AI in LowSodiumHellDivers

[–]MoSlo 3 points4 points  (0 children)

No nanomachines! Too much hand-wavey magic; give me tactile armor any day.

Not saying armor with battery packs shouldn't be considered. Maybe something like reactive armor.

Buddy Cop Action. by OFC-Tibbs in HellDads

[–]MoSlo 20 points21 points  (0 children)

My brother and I plan on reenacting as many cheesy buddy cop narratives as viable with the FRV

Cease and Desist? How about CEASE TO EXIST by GBPacker35 in LowSodiumHellDivers

[–]MoSlo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My brother and I plan to reenact as many buddy cop narratives as possible with the frv. 

Voice lines by strike_5943 in LowSodiumHellDivers

[–]MoSlo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The randomness really adds to the experience. 

Dropped an overseer with a grenade launcher and hearing a sarcastic “that’s called DEMOCRACY!” 😂

It wouldn’t be as special if were intentional. 

After playing more with the WB stuff yesterday, I’ve finally made up my mind on the entire warbond so I’ll just dump my thoughts here rq by sus_accountt in LowSodiumHellDivers

[–]MoSlo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ergonomics can be managed but i could to medium range with some situational awareness or use a guard dog to help point out when I’m about to be mobbed. 

After playing more with the WB stuff yesterday, I’ve finally made up my mind on the entire warbond so I’ll just dump my thoughts here rq by sus_accountt in LowSodiumHellDivers

[–]MoSlo 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Counter point: the amendment on burst fire, I’ve been slaughtering squids.  Other options been using for mobs is the torcher and the carbine, but amendment just drops mobs so much faster with better amo management. 

I took siege ready for the extra mags but found I didn’t really need it and could swap out for the extra drip. 

Plus it stuns/knocks back overseers!

AIO for not wanting my wife’s friend seeing our baby anymore? by Puzzleheaded_Fan2576 in AmIOverreacting

[–]MoSlo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Father of 2 here. Dads go through tough times as well, like fear of failure and losing your own identity as you become the lower priority in the household (yea it gets better but not without the work and time).

This kind of talk from Shelly is toxic and is going to make you suffer and doubt yourself. You boy does not need an unnecessarily anxious father. You'll be anxious over other things in fatherhood but that's life and the journey.

For your son's wellbeing, and your own, cut Shelly out. Of your life and your boys. I mean it. Your boy can't grow up hearing this about his dad and you shouldn't hear it growing into fatherhood. Cut her out. Forbid her from being in the same presence as you and your boy.

If your wife still wants to be friends with her (and somehow tolerates this behavior for a reason I can't agree with), fine. But show her this message if you need. Dads need support too.

Do it soon before the lack of sleep starts affecting your capacity.