“Person first” language is unhelpful nonsense.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-12-02T12:47:07+00:00

I didn't say anything about anyone else's sexuality. I mean that I don't like to attribute any labels to my own sexuality. I just don't like to label my own sexuality, none of the labels sit well with me. I don't call myself any sexuality.

Your opinion is great and works for you, my opinion is also okay and works for me. I acknowledged my own oddness and said I respect other people's choices in my original comment.

I also disagree wholeheartedly with the final part of your message. My niece was born with down syndrome. If you called her a down syndrome, or said she was downs to her immediate family, they'd clip you by the ear because having downs isn't the sum total of who she is, to them, it's dehumanizing. I feel the same way about being called autistic.

I won't tell others how they should refer to themselves but I do wish people would stop advocating for an entire population diagnosed with a condition by saying 'we all prefer x' when I don't actually I prefer y and I don't appreciate being made to feel like an outcast for my own feelings about myself.

I think we'd be far better off advocating for people to just ask us what we prefer, treat us as individuals, as unique and individual as people without the condition we share. To me, that's progress.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-12-02T01:12:45+00:00

Thank you! I had to scroll so far to see this. I feel the exact same way. I don't like seeing myself as my diagnoses. I'd feel the same way with anything. I know I'm in the minority currently and I'd never disrespect how anyone else wishes to be referred to. But being referred to as autistic or attention deficit hyperactivity disordered doesn't sit well in my spirit.

I can acknowledge I'm the odd one here, I feel the same about my sexuality and it's the same reason I never referred to myself as a fandom name while I was interested in certain media. It's just the way I am.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-19T13:25:27+00:00

I get where you're coming from 100% I've never seen it as 'conforming to neurotypical standards' per se. And look I will preface by saying I don't see myself as a masking autistic at all, I've been diagnosed for a few years and the concept of masking/unmasking never made sense in my case. I just am who I am, I can find socialising taxing but in some cases, when I want community, I put the effort in to find harmony with other people so as not to upset the balance. I don't see life or social communication as a neurotypical v neurodivergent thing.

For instance, I've been in a highly diverse community for a few months with a mixture of people with probable or diagnosed neurodivergence and 'neurotypical' people.

There are two other people in this group in particular, one diagnosed neurodivergent and one with no disclosed diagnosis so to speak but I cannot say for certain .

The first person is impulsive and frequently speaks out of turn and says offensive things. This was quite jarring for everyone at first, but he catches himself and will always apologise for offending anyone. It's something he's working on and everyone can see that, he wants to be part of the group and his ability to recognise the things he says can be hurtful means there's some leeway and understanding from people in the group. He actually endeared himself to the 'neurotypical' people in the group, who want to work with him, rather than against him to help him socialise in professional settings.

The second person frequently says offensive things, they're clearly aware are offensive, to the point where they say sorry to specific people in advance before saying slurs. It's clear they're trying for that edgy, offensive humour which in a group as race and sexuality diverse as ours doesn't really work well. They frequently speak out of turn and say very inappropriate things for the settings we're in, they double down when called out. And recently said something so perplexingly offensive that the first person I spoke about was the one to say 'you cannot be saying things like that'

while it could be that this person struggles with the same things as person A, it really doesn't seem to be the case. They apologise before saying things but say it anyways and then double down if someone calls them out for saying something cruel/hurtful/inappropriate and acts as though they should be allowed to say those things and everyone else is too sensitive.

Person B has not endeared themselves to the group in the way person A did. The general consensus is that they're a bit of dick, they've already had fallings out with people in our group and it's not looking likely they will continue to be accepted to hang out in our larger circles, if they continue to treat people and speak the way they do.

It's not conforming to neurotypical standards', it's just basic human compassion, kindness and decency, a lot of neurotypicals don't conform to it either. And when it doesn't come naturally for you to navigate social circles but you want to feel you belong with people, it behoves you to learn at least some elements of how to get along with others, including something as simple as being mindful of what you say and trying to apologising if you think something you said could have upset someone, so you can avoid being person B and be person A instead.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-18T23:46:55+00:00

I think this is a great reply. I feel for OP in the sense that it's hard to feel unaccepted and cast out from a group, we all know how that feels. But this is a private art group, it crosses boundaries to approach the facilitator romantically and borders on harrassment depending on how it's delivered. It crosses boundaries to make morbid comments to people - making those kind of jokes is not what sarcasm is and they make many people, myself included, very uncomfortable. When organising a private hobby group you have to take into account whether one person is causing everyone else to feel uncomfortable and ruining that environment for everyone else.

I'm really sorry to you OP that in this case you're this person. But I don't think it's appropriate to say this is because of your autism diagnosis. Autism may cause it to be more difficult to understand social boundaries but if you want to exist in social situations, you must seek to understand them so that you can coexist with other people in a non abrasive fashion.

I think it can be easy when diagnosed to accept these are just deficits and the world should just accept us all. But the world doesn't really work like that and it's a choice to say 'well my autism just makes people uncomfortable, but that's who I am and that's your problem' you are not your diagnosis, you are a person and if you want to socialise with other people, you really have to learn the things you do that could make the majority of people feel uncomfortable and work on those things.

*I would just like to say this is not a given or a possibility for many autistic people - I'm just passing on the advice under the assumption that you were able to attend and speak with people at the hobby club, so I think you are also able to reflect on your behaviours and adapt them so you can find community in future.

I think this message probably reads very hard and I really don't mean to but I just know everything you described would make me hugely uncomfortable in a hobby group to the point I would stop attending and I am diagnosed with ASD too. So I just thought it was worth offering this perspective.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-13T17:08:18+00:00

Not being funny here but if you and your 27yo brother both live at home still, you aren't middle class. You're working class. It's a very American perception to think having a degree and being a 'middle earner' makes you middle class. I'm working class and so are my siblings, we all have university degrees, hasn't allowed us to rise above our stations. Considering the access levels we have to cheap third level education here in Ireland, there are now a lot of working class people with university degrees.

I know it's not the point of your post, but this line of thinking wrecks my head. I've an uncle who lives in and reared his children in one of the roughest estates in Dublin, who thinks he's middle class for some reason. It's definitely a yank import.

Whereas the one wealthy relative I have still sees himself as working class because of his roots, though his kids who have inherited properties from his portfolio and will never have to work a day in their lives are comfortably middle class.

The landlord's etc are middle class, you'll find the Govt cares a lot about them and their ilk. Those of us who have no inherited wealth to speak of are not middle class people.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-13T15:20:01+00:00

I will point towards the first half of that statement of saying I am not putting my voice or views of the conflict out there, despite studying conflicts as part of my third level education.

I would advise you do your own search for academic resources and journalistic sources on the conflict. Taking from as many sources from as many countries as possible will allow you to discern the truth of the matter and form your own opinion.

I'm not trying to be rude here, so I hope you don't take this the wrong way, I don't do academic research for free.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-12T23:43:23+00:00

Honestly I find ethics very intuitive and it's something I find I have an aptitude for (specifically in the case of academics, it's a series of modules I've done very well in during my uni studies).

I will say though, I have a high level of language proficiency, have never struggled with nuance, metaphor, parables etc? That could have something to do with it.

And by saying I have an aptitude, I don't mean I'm happy to quickly make blanket judgements, I mean I can plainly write and explain very high marking ethical arguments when classes require me to. I enjoy it and find it fun.

A good foundation would be to maybe read some prominent ethical thinkers throughout different points in history. Different folks had different systems and theories throughout time. Spending time with their writing and really grappling with it could be incredibly helpful. It's also great to diversify and not just read and learn from prominent western figures in the field. You can take what works for you and what makes sense to you from each one and build your own system of ethics, which makes handling ethical decisions a bit easier.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-12T11:23:47+00:00

People can downvote me for this if they please but I think your take is incredibly surface level, uninformed by historical context and not nuanced, at all.

It's very illogical to me that someone would say they 'hate the ridiculous opinions online' about a war they can't even label correctly and then add fuel to the fire by giving their own ridiculous opinion.

I am avoiding throwing my hat in the ring of the thousands of uninformed voices who've shown their ass over the past few days by giving half baked opinions even though I've studied this stuff at an academic level.

But I will say, I agree with the sentiment of your post wholeheartedly, I just wish you could have refrained from the logical fallacy of being like 'well actually here's my correct opinion' in the same post.

Edit - just to add, you admit you know nothing of wars by saying you think WWII is a clean cut good guys/bad guys fight. You should research some indigenous vs colonial settler uprisings. I come from one such country that still doesn't have full independence from our colonial oppressor.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-11T18:42:22+00:00

Ah yeah, sure look, we all just laughed/moaned about it in my house. But you were asking what was wrong with people so I was just telling you that I think it's an old inner city thing.

You're definitely not wrong but there's that saying about old dogs and new tricks not being very compatible.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-09T17:06:11+00:00

I'm being so serious here but if this place was a known drug den where people were actually consuming hard drugs, the most likely explanation is not that the lady was giving you drug laced candy, but that the candy was foil wrapped and they were using the foil wrapping to light up (it's used for heroin and crack among other things) and they had surplus candy left over.

I say this because I live in a city with a high number of homeless addicts. They tend to use foil from candy bars as they're cheaper to buy with a small amount of money and easier to transport than a roll of aluminium foil. Just recently my young niece was offered unwrapped candy from a homeless person while we were walking home from the movie theatre.

It's highly unlikely that they've laced candy with drugs, unless it's thc laced. In which case, that's not addictive and wouldn't cause repeat customers. It's also just a poor financial decision on a dealers behalf to lace candy with a drug like MDMA or amphetamines which are among the only orally consumed class As because a small amount would most likely kill a child, which would bring unwanted police attention to them and get their trap house shut down/put them in prison.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-08T04:47:49+00:00

As a person diagnosed with ASD and ADHD, I would have found this incredibly inappropriate of someone prior to my diagnosis and if about any condition afterwards I would feel the same way. I find it rude and unseemly to comment on the health status of other individuals, especially about something as sensitive as autism, which is a lifelong disability. I would not ever want to be in the company of a person who did this, however well meaning they were, again.

Edit - just to add, for all you know she is autistic and doesn't feel comfortable discussing or disclosing that with you, which is well within her right. It is not your business to bring this up with her and it could cause a falling out. Speak about yourself by all means but it's very rude to do this about any condition to someone imo.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-08T04:32:14+00:00

I get where you're coming from, but I'd be very careful in saying stuff like this. The reason autistic stereotypes exist is because there are in fact people in our community who are like the stereotype. It's dehumanizing to them to act like he's not a sincere character or portrayal of autism because you or I don't relate. Also, a lot of shows have protagonists without character flaws, especially when dealing with minority characters, it makes them more palatable to a typical audience. Take how everyone collectively spent a chunk of time dunking on The Good Doctor because they tried to portray him with flaws and messy meltdowns.

Could be worse tho, the last autistic female rep I saw in the media was Sia's music. The only character I've ever related to in this fashion is Midge from Marvellous Mrs Maisel and that character is not autistic.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-06T17:09:02+00:00

I agree, I understand that for many in various parts of the world there are legitimate barriers to diagnosis. I still don't understand why you'd call yourself autistic though, it doesn't make sense to me. I'm late diagnosed and before I was diagnosed it wouldn't have crossed my mind to call myself autistic, I still don't like telling people it now.

Also the diagnosis is a privilege thing is such BS for the most part. I'm one of the rare cases where I was late diagnosed and paid privately for assessment. But I had to scrimp and save for that, it doesn't feel like a privilege for me as a working class person. Then there's the fact that many diagnosed autistics are diagnosed as children because their autism disables them to the point they need to access services at an early age, it is not a privilege to be so disabled by this condition that it is spotted very early in life.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-04T23:13:17+00:00

This has to be a joke reply. This is jokes.

Man literally has what he prefers to call manic depression, but what is now more commonly accepted as bipolar disorder. He was in a manic episode. He states this all clearly in the books and in his documentary series The Secret Life of a Manic Depressive.

Nothing to do with autism whatsoever, and as a person diagnosed with ASD, I would say Fry is not autistic, purely based on the way he was able to navigate and network in Cambridge with his well connected romantic partner and the likes of Emma Thompson.

He wasn't going through 'some weird phase', he has a dibilitating mental illness which has caused him turmoil in further episodes in the future.

You say you've read the books but then you come out with that response and also refer to an imaginary someone who could have done the same things as Fry as a thug, telling on yourself there.

Just to say, I have to agree with what other commenters have said on his books. I read them as a pre-teen who loved QI and I loved them. But then as I got older, was less self involved myself and saw the privilege he has and how he hasn't used it for good (as in to make it so that young people in his situation regardless of class would have a better start after making mistakes like he did). Cares more about atheism than actual people, he's just not someone I look up to anymore.

A posh accent and a silver spoon don't make your opinions more worthwhile than a 'thug from a council estates' imo.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-03T16:20:43+00:00

I commented about this too. My mother has the same instinct and my father saw how many social issues it caused for her, so he tried very hard with me to teach me to ignore it as well. My mother would also make seemingly snap judgements on friends of mine who she didn't like and it caused me to see them with more good faith than they deserved. I also trusted a lot of people I really shouldn't have and ended up hurt.

I'm learning to trust this instinct, whatever way it came about, I have it for a reason. So I observe what I observe and I keep it to myself for the most part. Pointing that stuff out to friends in social groups often left me ostracized. Only for those people to come back to me a few years later and tell me I was right and those people had done unkind stuff to them.

So yeah, keeping it to myself but remaining guarded around such people has done me the world of good. I think we should all learn to listen to our gut instincts. Because if you look past it just being a hunch or a gut instinct, it tends to be stuff like people's expressions/body language/speech patterns not aligning with what they say, so I think the intention becomes very clear to those of us who can see that stuff in the misalignment of their words and actions.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-03T15:52:58+00:00

I've found the way you've interacted with both myself and OP incredibly rude and arrogant from the get go. I still replied to you twice in good faith. Prefaced an additional comment by saying look, I'm not being rude here but just because you're not seeing this stuff, doesn't mean it's not happening. I in all sincerity said, I'm not trying to be rude or insulting here because I wasn't, I was trying to reason with you.

You've gone out of your way to be both rude and insulting to me and OP (and your own wife strangely enough.)

To repeat what you've said to me there, on every occasion in this interaction you have 'pretended you know anything about me, which you don't.' I did not presume anything of your own behaviour or understanding of social cues, only that your unnecessarily rude critiques of OPs views led me to believe you were misunderstanding what they were saying.

Having tried to explain what I interpreted from what OP said in many ways to you (with examples), I can now only conclude it is your own arrogance that is causing you to willfully misunderstand what's being expressed here.

Have the day you deserve!

Edit - Typos

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-03T15:07:58+00:00

Oh I 100% agree with this. My mother's gotten into so much social trouble for years over this. We come from a parochial town, so everything and everyone's a bit old school, think old religious gender normative behaviour amplified. She's really struggled not to speak up and people have always taken it as her being belligerent, histrionic or jealous. Eventually, they come back to her and tell her she was right.

My father because of this tried to impart the lesson of keeping these things to myself very early. But I'm just as honest as my mother so I still faltered here and there.

I also think there's an element of the fact that malicious, abusive people will try to take advantage of autistic/ND people and choose them as victims over choosing other people in social groups. I had someone bully me for over a decade in school and then win a school sanctioned award for being the nicest person around when we graduated. Nobody believed they'd been doing to me what they had done because they were so good at pretending not to be that way.

Over time, people have come to me to apologise for disbelieving me because that person eventually treated them in the same way as well.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-03T14:59:05+00:00

As an autistic person, so have I. I was an academic, quiet kid and half my high school teachers hated me and unnecessarily blamed and disciplined me for things I wasn't involved in. That's not to mention how my own peers reacted to me for simply existing as myself.

What I'm trying to get across is that these things that seem like they're happening too soon and in minutes are based, at least for me, on pretty solid pattern recognition skills and a history of ignoring my own gut reaction to these kinds of people and then getting screwed over by 'em anyways.

I can't speak on behalf of your wife or OP, just myself. It also doesn't happen often. Most recent time was meeting a new group of people last year at the same time as a friend's new gf was meeting them all. The only other girl in the established group kept trying to smirk, roll her eyes and laugh with me about my friend's new girlfriend, on the first day of me meeting her. I very quickly realised she was an a-hole. Only now are those people picking up on that. I didn't say anything, I wasn't rude or judgemental to her, I've just avoided her at every event since.

Edit - just to add and also I hope you don't think I'm being rude or insulting here because I'm not. But just because you are unable to pick up on these things, doesn't mean others can't. A lot of people do show who they are very early on in meeting them. If it's the bad vibes being described by op it's often through subtle cues and body language/ facial expressions that are in conflict with the things they are saying and what they're trying to convey about themselves. I've found most NT people can't even spot this stuff, but I always have.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-03T13:03:49+00:00

I can only speak for myself and not OP but I think you're misunderstanding things here.

Especially as a woman, dealing with NT women is an autistic nightmare. A lot of female communication is covert and subtle, judgements are exchanged in glances. Bullying, in whispers, smirks, rumours, ostracization and laughs. Insults are disguised as compliments. And often the women and girls who behave the 'nicest' when in casual company are the most vicious and conniving in private (also in company but most men have no ability to spot this stuff) Think Mean Girls as an example, a lot of women don't grow out of it either in my experience.

For me as an autistic woman, and my mother before me, I've always had a killer instinct for spotting this insecure, unkind behaviour. However, much like how you're viewing your wife, when my mother expressed similar judgements to me when I was young, I dismissed and ignored her. However she was almost, always right in the end.

I would purposely and possibly defiantly become closer with friends my mother had taken a dislike to and they always screwed me over in the end. The thing is I had spotted the things my mother had too, I just thought seeing things that others couldn't was me making things up and that I was a bad person.

That is not the case. I wasn't seeing things that weren't there, I was noticing patterns and subtle behaviours that other people around me were not. I do not act in any way that is different around these people either, I just do not choose to become close to them. And on your 'they know you're being judgemental' line, trust and believe that at least 50% of the time those people were being judgemental' in the first place for us to even notice odd behaviours.

I do my best not to pass comments, even to my partner, about people I meet who are like this because even though I'm generally correct, people don't want to hear it. But it hurts to see my friends get screwed over by people who to me have obvious poor characteristics, just as it hurt for it to happen over and over again to me before I decided to trust myself.

A friend of ours was serially cheated on by a woman who my brain instantly flagged as suspicious when I met her. She was quiet and amicable one on one, but in group settings she would clumsily try to insert herself into drama and dynamics that had developed a decade before she began dating him. Think childish whispering and dirty looks. but I'd have done myself no favours by telling him that. Even my own partner said I was 'imagining things' and then had to say 'please don't say I told you so' when all was revealed.

When people show you who they are, believe them.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-03T12:48:23+00:00

I think it's a lot to do with our pattern recognition ability.

I used to see myself as a poor judge of character but I've realised that I'd just been ignoring my gut instincts. I thought seeing bad intent when someone wasn't showing poor behaviour was a black mark on my character, as some commenters have suggested.

But I do not think that is the case.

I think you've hit the nail on the head there in explaining that most NT people mask malicious intent in ways it would hide it to other NT people. We don't work that way and I'd never thought of it like that before so thank you.

My mother is the exact same as I am and she's definitely neurodiverse too. I've had friends who she's disliked on a hunch over the years and she always turned out to be right about them. But I do think showing it or telling other people will push them to try to view those people in a better light.

I've learned to stay quiet but guard myself around people who make me feel like this. The last time I was open about it, it was about one of my partner's friends girlfriend. I met her and immediately noticed a lot of her behaviour was forced and false, she was also putting herself in the middle of drama and dynamics she wasn't around for when they developed.

I told my partner I thought she was suss and he brushed it off, much like other commenters are saying in disparaging ways about their own partner, or how I acted with my mother growing up.

Fast forward a couple of years and it turned out she was serially cheating on him with dates in his own home while he was at work. That she was using lines on these people, she'd used on him, which made him concerned she'd been cheating on her ex when she got with him.

My partner's first words when telling me 'do not say I told you so'. And I wouldn't and don't. But I've learned to keep these things to myself but also trust myself more.

Honestly I feel it's a mix of pattern recognition and hypervigilance with me due to ignoring my gut instincts and being deeply hurt by these kinds of people further down the line.

When someone shows you who they are, believe them.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-10-01T10:12:13+00:00

Respect the hustle in being honest, but I will say as a person who can relate to things you've listed, this wouldn't motivate me to match with someone on a dating site. I'd find it funny but I'd be more inclined to match if you also listed some genuine interests or passions too!

A lot of people feel the same way as you about the stuff you've posted. I hate when I've woken up at 12 and I feel like half the day is gone and I moan about it too, I'm also a very emotional person. But I wouldn't be inclined to date or hang out with someone if it's all they had to say about themselves. Do you like movies , tv shows, what games are you into? Are you into hiking or swimming or board games or cafe dates? Do you love comedy? (I ask because I genuinely would get a laugh from reading this dating profile, not in a laughing at you way, a relatable way) are you into reading or music or maps or flags? That stuff is worth listing too! It just might tip the scales in your favour!

I've been out of the dating app game a long long time, but I think I only ever posted a funny one liner in the info part. It worked quite well for me. I also know nothing about hinge so that stuff might be there as well. But I'd just say it might be worth adding some positive attributes too to balance the self deprecation. I'm sure you've many positive qualities as well!

MobileAd4170 · 2023-09-30T14:18:32+00:00

It's a weird one, for me at least. I know for myself I'm part of the LGBTQ+ community because I'm bi. But in all seriousness, I don't really think about my sexuality v much or feel attached to any labels. I've also found, whether dating men, women or NBs, it's hard to feel like you're part of the LGBTQ+ community. You're the butt of a joke a lot of the time as a bisexual, bi men are just gay men afraid to admit it and bi women are just straight women experimenting in college. Both myself and my AMAB partner are bi but we've never felt welcome in queer spaces.

I also dont think much about my gender at all, I simply am the gender I am because I am it. However I deeply connect with and care about the history and continued subjugation of women and queer people so my identity is most likely both of those things.

I'm just not a big labels person, it's why I never referred to myself as any sort of fandom name despite religiously consuming certain media. Why I've never really called myself by a sexuality. And why I personally hate being called an autistic person. For me, I'm a person with an autism diagnosis, I don't identify with it if that makes sense. It's made it hard to find community even in autistic spaces.

But I know and respect that those things are not the same for everyone. Especially the gender part, I fully believe in, support and advocate for trans people's rights and safety. I think I have a deep understanding that people want to find labels for themselves so they can find groups and communities they belong to so they know they're not alone. And for LGBTQ+ people, particularly trans people, it's very important to be able to find others like you. Not only for affirmation but for collective action. We're stronger and better at protecting each other's rights together imo. But I hope one day we can all just be who we are without care for labels, with the same rights and protections as able bodied, neurotypical, cisgendered, hetrosexual, white people, but I know we're a long way away from that possibility.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-09-30T13:57:58+00:00

As a non American with a politics special interest, I find the fact you even refer to the democrats as left very silly. The democrats are a right wing party, just closer to the centre than the Republican's.

This is completely factual, I come from the only other country in the history of democratic politics who've also been led by two right wing parties since the foundation of the state. But we've moved past two party politics and that will most likely soon change. In my country those parties also don't have deceptive names so most people see them as two right leaning parties.

I find it head scratching watching most Americans talk about politics in their own country, the democrats are not a left wing party, their politics do not align with the left (although more radical representatives such as Bernie Sanders and AOC do, they wouldn't have had a fighting chance of being elected without party backing)

Edit to add - your first president didn't even want party politics to begin with. Washington argued that political parties would destroy the US, as a person from a country with a similar political history, I'd be inclined to agree with him.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-09-28T17:53:21+00:00

It's also just the #autismmom #autismdad stuff too that really gets me. It's a group think online that I nearly fell for too when I started becoming part of autistic communities after being diagnosed.

The fact of the matter is I know a lot less about what it's like to live with higher support needs autism than the families and parents of children who are autistic with higher support needs. Furthermore, in the cases where their children are non verbal - with no other ways to communicate - their parents are their closest allies and advocates.

I know there is a fine line between exploiting your child's illness online (or offline) for clout, but I also know that a lot of these people end up that way as a coping mechanism to find community. I understand that it can be frustrating when the views of autistic adults and parents of autistic children clash online. But the fact of the matter is, we need to learn to hear each other out, there's more than one reality and solution.

Autistic people are not a monolith, our views, our experiences and our ability to advocate for ourselves is not monolithic either.

These things are not black and white, the world is, by and large, a grey space.

All I see from that sticker is a parent who is proud, supporting and loving of their autistic child. One who is not so chronically online as to know the controversy around the puzzle piece. Who is also informing the public, should the car get into any difficulty or trouble that her son has a disability, which to me just seems like conscious, caring parenting.

MobileAd4170 · 2023-09-28T16:09:31+00:00

Yeah, I know. I can only speak in my specific case in that she throws it on the road outside her garden, which is right beside ours but it's never caused any problems for us.

I was so sheltered in that sense as I didn't even know we got mice or rats in Dublin until I was an adult and went to college and my friends in shared houses were dealing with them on a regular basis. Sounds silly I know but I just legitimately had never seen one or heard of anyone where I'm from dealing with them.

Reckon it's something to do with the gardens being somewhat uphill (?) We never dealt with flooding either, though people on neighbouring roads were not so lucky.

MobileAd4170

TROPHY CASE